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Forever Young Alts

How old is this alt: 12 years old or 52 years old?

Forever Young Alts never age. They never appear to get older. They don’t appear to have a definite gender.

You can’t tell how old ForeverYoungAlts are. He or she might be an 11 year old whose parents make too much money and let them go on an alt-shopping spree, or possibly a 52 year old who worked in graphic design before Adobe even existed.

Forever Young Alts (4.E.Y.A.) might be into relevant stuff, or they might be into retro stuff. They also might be into what Gen Xers thought was cool in the 1990s (purgatory interests).
In addition, you can’t tell where Forever Young Alts are from. This person might be from suburban Ohio (visiting NYC with a church group) or it might be from 1970s Liverpool. It might even be from some sort of spaceship that dropped off ambiguously gendered beings.

In addition, you can’t tell if Forever Young Alts are ‘masculine little girls’ or ‘feminine little boys.’

Forever Young alts have strict diets that keep them from aging. They sleep in hyperbaric chambers with built in iPod touch controls/mp3 player functionality.

Have u seen n e Forever Young Alts walking the streets lately? How do you find out information about them? Communicating with a 4.E.Y.A. can be difficult because you don’t really know where/when they are from or what they are into.

[Photo by AltaMiraNyc]

They don’t make meaningful cinema like they used to :-(

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26 Comments

  1. Anonymous
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 7:11 pm | Permalink

    wooooooooohooooooooooo!
    nice outfit, definitely feminine boy.
    crls, how come everyone hates 15 yr. old alts?
    i’m pretty legit (not entry level) but american appy employees sneer at me when i try to buy a v-neck.
    what’s wrong with being forever young?

    Reply

  2. lou reed
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 7:30 pm | Permalink

    they just wish they had your skin and outlook on life

    Reply

  3. electroslag
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 7:41 pm | Permalink

    loves it…teeny weeny.

    Reply

  4. Martijn
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 7:44 pm | Permalink

    Is Ellen Page a 4EYA?

    Reply

  5. Anonymous
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 7:45 pm | Permalink

    that’s my friend’s little brother. he is 14 and gets more p00sy than all of us combined.

    Reply

  6. Anonymous
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 7:47 pm | Permalink

    Why do people blog on here “what’s wrong with being _” I am and I am okay. You are seriously asking a bunch of strangers to tell you to be okay with what you have self discovered yourself to be.

    Reply

  7. annnikaaaa
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 7:55 pm | Permalink

    what does alt meannn?

    Reply

  8. Anonymous
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 8:04 pm | Permalink

    that’s just some kid who spent too many hours wankin’ it to the jonas brothers and then he realized that instead of just tuggin it to them…he could be them and get all the tugjobs in the w0rld!

    Reply

  9. Anonymous
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 8:06 pm | Permalink

    highly tuggable

    Reply

  10. soft taco
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 8:39 pm | Permalink

    entry-lvl jonas brother

    Reply

  11. Anonymous
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 8:54 pm | Permalink

    LOLER

    Reply

  12. Anonymous
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 9:10 pm | Permalink

    the concept of a foreveryoungalt is very creepy.
    you made it seem like they were robots of some kind.
    you stories scare me carls!

    Reply

  13. Anonymous
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 10:17 pm | Permalink

    WHAT THE FUCK IS A MEME I SEE IT EVERYWHERE (on hro)

    Reply

  14. Anonymous
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 10:33 pm | Permalink

    I believe I actually know him. He is 21 and he is actually in his twenties. Sweet boy.

    Reply

  15. jmfrisbey
    Posted August 19, 2008 at 11:04 pm | Permalink

    his dad should have played him that song about poontang by the ted nugentz when he was fourteen like my dad did.

    Reply

  16. Anonymous
    Posted August 20, 2008 at 3:35 am | Permalink

    meme-wikipedia… self educate like the rest of us who spend too much time on the internet

    Reply

  17. Anonymous
    Posted August 20, 2008 at 3:53 am | Permalink

    he might be 12 but i’d totally tug that 4.E.Y.A.

    Reply

  18. Alex Dobbs
    Posted August 20, 2008 at 11:34 pm | Permalink

    I work with this guy… his name is Garrett…
    he’s a pretty cool guy to work with… We do advertising and sort of like video blogging about stuff sort of…. we work at psychoPEDIA.com…

    Reply

  19. Anonymous
    Posted August 21, 2008 at 2:10 am | Permalink

    his outfits nice, but the hair is just horrible!

    Reply

  20. Anonymous
    Posted August 21, 2008 at 6:22 pm | Permalink

    stepford alt

    Reply

  21. Anonymous
    Posted August 22, 2008 at 3:59 am | Permalink

    “He is 21 and he is actually in his twenties” lol

    The fact that people already think they know him as a 14/21 year old adds to his ambiguity.

    Whatever though, I’d give him a tug…or two.

    Reply

  22. Anonymous
    Posted August 22, 2008 at 5:12 am | Permalink

    “Communicating with a 4.E.Y.A. can be difficult because you don’t really know where/when they are from or what they are into. “

    and it can also be difficult, because my mind is torn between the part that screams tug job, and the one that says JAILBAIT!
    he kinda has a tom chaplin vibe…
    tom could also have been 4.E.Y.A.

    Reply

  23. Anonymous
    Posted August 22, 2008 at 5:15 am | Permalink

    Ya gotta se the documentary about Rodney on the Roq (Mayor of the Sunset Strip it’s called). He definitely falls in this category.

    Reply

  24. Anonymous
    Posted August 22, 2008 at 8:36 am | Permalink

    guys he is he off the cover of that M83 album??
    soo keyute!

    Reply

  25. Anonymous
    Posted August 22, 2008 at 10:09 pm | Permalink

    yeah you are totally right…. he is on that m83 album cover, i see him out everywhere, he always looks so strung out haha

    Reply

  26. Anonymous
    Posted August 28, 2008 at 11:11 am | Permalink

    holy shit i just realised I am a 4.E.Y.A.

    Reply

One Trackback

  1. By URNMONEY: pounds of penance on January 26, 2009 at 1:08 pm

    [...] The Forever Young AndrogynAlt [photo byEasy Fashion]Yall might remember theForever Young Alt: Forever Young Alts never age. They never appear to get older. They don’t appear to have a [...]

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