I think that after the altBro explosion of 2k8, altBros have ‘gone into hiding’ when the camera guy comes around. Instead of proudly posing with their arms around their best bros, they disperse/look for altBROads to be photographed with/jones on.
I first identify an altBro when I see:
a) a group of 3 or more bros who are alt
b) bro with plaid shirt + a tie
c) bro with beatles shirt
d) post-strategic facial scruff
e) bro with a rosary
f) bro who looks like he needs a tug
g) bro with a quirky personal brand
h) bros with failed retail jackets/hoodies
i) white belt Bro
j) choose.your.own.unique.altbro.identifier
[Photo by We Are Awesome]
Fun Fact: having pictures of altBro herds on your party pic site leads to your site losing 33% of site visitors. Those visitors are usually the ‘lonely bros who jerk off to hot sluts on party pix sites.’
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IAmCarles.com
15 Comments
chili’s
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I smell a chav in there.
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lumberjack-derived fashion will never die
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hey mr. carleser, I have a question for you, how far do you have to go to prove that you have a trendy band??
What if you said American Apparel was selling t-shirts with your band logo, but they’re not…lol
check this out bro, middle of the page:
http://www.myspace.com/hannahais
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They prbly read this C and will now b horribly offended and think you are a bad judge of altness. Or they’ll fall into a deep depression and become emo-goths who will bleed themselves into the void.
I hope for the latter.
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lawlcats
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POST MORE CHILI’S PICS. ACTUALLY CAN WE GET ALT BREASTS AND CHILI’S PICS IN ONE POST MAYBE?
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middle bro has yellow fucking teeth
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you can never be sure about altbros just by looking at them. you need to do your facebook homework. check for pictures involving 4/5: alcohol in red cups, shutter shades, group photos with matching whacky expressions, neon ‘electro” shirts that don’t actually have anything to do with electro music, xtreeeeeme sports.
but as a shortcut, I use wayfarers and the alt-bro strut. you know what I’m talking about.
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yeah i second the “chav” comment
this is definitely some british kind o’ shit
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i believe that is a brosary
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the biggest red flag for lemming mentality and lack of originality is manifested whenever you dress up like Justice for halloween.
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the guy on the left is kind of hot.
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Agree ^
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yeah i’d tug the one on the left. he’s a little xavy de rosy, n’est-ce pas?
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