ALTBRO or ALTBAG is an HRO gimmick where I find pix of alternative males. Readers then must decide if the person pictured is an altBro or an altBag.
[Image by the Minneapoline]
Please justify your answer in order to receive full credit.
For example: “He is an altBag bc he is wearing a chandelier necklace.’
or “He is an AltBro bc he is wearing a hat with a lil bill.’
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50 Comments
F THA NEW HRO WITH THIS SYSTEM
nice post tho
altbag
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1st!, alt bag: entire ensemble reads, “I’m an extra on the set of Dazed and Confused”
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altbag due to necklace+fggty expression
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altBag. necklace.
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alt bro, because he has no mustache
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altbro. he looks like a tote gae with that necklace. now if he had a nice chest-tuft and was wearing v-neck, i’d do him, but not in the state he’s in now.
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altBro because he has no altChick.
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altbag bc I know him hahahaha.
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//////////Reply by sexrex
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 8:53 pm
@topshat, hahaha- i also know him and agree- altbag.
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Def a bro. Lush conditioned locks, kewl front pocket fold (auth.), The Four Elements Mayan pendantage. <3
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ALTBAG. 1>)TTLY post Edward Norton T2 wannabe. 2<) Look how stoned I amz 3#)Stole his GFs vintage ALTnecktie.
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ALTBAG -> he has no justissejacket
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NOT ALT BECAUSE FUCKING KINGS OF LEON
INDIEBAG
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//////////Reply by ArtsandHumanitiesmjr
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 12:56 pm
@Mechrobioticon,
Yes, indiebag is the word im looking for!
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Does he have denim on for pants? he’s altBag. If he has black pants and not the canadian tuxedo, it’s an altBro.
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//////////Reply by anaonymous
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 1:01 am
@sniff, he had grey pants with some brown leather kinks boots
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well i would say he’s a pfork alt just because he’s wearin a necklace with the cover of that weekend of vampires album on it. like have you ever known an auth-alt who liked them??? seriously
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bag
but i’d hts
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bag.
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bg, id hit it.
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necklace + jacket = bag
alternatively:
necklace + jacket = physical illness
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yes indiebag!
i dont see much alt at all
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jean jackets so 2K5.
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That dude looks he sucks.
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altfagg = neclace + hat he most likely acquired while shopping at a “chic” girls boutique store
+10 pts for the hair and the confidence to wear that though.
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Definitely an alt bag. Look at the hat, the hair, the necklace….. IT SHOULD BE OBVIOUS CRLZ!
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Neither! Kings of Leon couldn’t be alt if they played an AmAppy in-store show with MGMT opening for them.
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BRO -
pre2k8 KOL = AltBro.
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looks like he’s doing his best jagger impression. no vote (this kid rules)
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looks like the biggest bag ever. most bros are manscaped or metrosexuals and those eyebrows + hair combo are not flattering. but they are ironic.
and he’s also not utilizing any current hot trends, like too many neon colours or bomb shelter jackets.
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//////////Reply by Altbagyness Deyn
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 5:52 pm
@Anonymous,
dude you got it backwards!
altbros are like alt fratboys
altbags are like alt douchebags—ie dbags you’d see in a eurotrashy nightclub in head to toe armani exhange with waxed eyebrows and more hair gel than their gf.
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more bag than bro…
jacket is not alt at all tho… more indiebag
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This man is altbag bcuz he:
a.) is wearing a denim jacket
b.) is wearing a greek sailor’s hat
c.) is wearing a shiny necklace
d.) all of the above
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ALTBRO.
One look at his eyebrows tell us he’s not near vain enough to reach ALTBAGDOM.
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i bet that whatever he is, he does not smell like something you would want to wake up next to
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would be standard awlt sans small brim hat and graphic t.
as is would catch him outside the club with a straight right and make off with his ceiling piece, sneakers (i’m thinking probably some noncommital light pastel blue or raspberry pumas, sambas, or cortez?), and wallet.
might take rest of disgustogear just to trade in for credit at local second hand, 2
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He’s in a band here in Minneapolis which is just a shittier version of Q and not U.
http://www.myspace.com/theguystorm
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Have you ever listened to Q and not U? I clicked your link… sounds more like moving units or something…
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Nah that band is actually pretty good but their not very nice, and smelly.
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altbag for the silk confederate cap, and bringing up tragic memories
my great uncly uncle died in the civil war
not really, but i’m sure someone’s did
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Yall are a bunch of freaks, this shit is soooooooo hokey. Blog about whats best to spend ur parents moneys on. Plus we all know hes a bro. I mean come on, that Q and not U ripoff band hes in? Get a life, dude.
Tryin to catch me reposado!
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oh man, that’s my old roommate. total altbag. his pants are very tight and they’re either red or white. that’s all he wears.
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//////////Reply by tanner
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
@hcs,
hey, someone should take a picture of that money you owe us and put it on here. hcs is a bag
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//////////Reply by cvbc
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 5:29 pm
@tanner, ha ha ha- (this can’t be real)
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//////////Reply by hsc
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 6:59 pm
@tanner, i don’t owe you guys shit for money tanner. stop sleeping at my house, you live a block away. or at least bring over more booze!
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//////////Reply by cvbc
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 7:04 pm
@tanner, you going to let him get away with that tanner? call his shit out man!
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//////////Reply by tanner
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 10:14 pm
@hannah silk. Champagne
sorry I thought you were ryan? and it wouldve been funny if you were but you aren’t so now its like wow. I’m glad we figured that out. You should give me some money anyway. kisses
Totes an Alt-baggy
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//////////Reply by Flanny
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 1:10 pm
@Angelo(sucks),
OMG right? Q & Not U were rockin until they used that Rapture producer. Totes mistake. HRO doesn’t attract Gang ‘o Four listeners, apparently. Tards.
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everyone that posted on this, except me, is retarded.
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what does all this mean? the internet is getting really boring.
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altbag
that that what is totally post-mainstream altbaggy
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altbag.
commit’d2thoz lox
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Altbag FAIL!
Kings of Leon aren’t even remotely alt anymore,
which makes this guy just a bag — there’s nothing alt about it.
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ryannn u iz a star! congratz.
btw no one in mpls looks like kings of leon so it’s a WIN, not a FAIL. ryan iz cute (tho this isn’t the best pic of him) and i love having him in my town.
re: the question: Altbag.
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altbag b/c of the long lawks of hair n fauxvintage t-shirt
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the guystorm can lick my gooch!
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i live in brooklyn, (thats in NYC fggt.) and this dude looks lk he eats chx wngs.
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Seems like an alright dude.
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alt bro–ish!
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