Should I do it off my iPhone or my iPod Nanny?
Which 1 will get me ‘m0re fuckt up’?
Should I have a certain song playing when I ’sniff it’ 4 the first time?
Just trying to find myself/fit in with a new group of Alt4Life friends that I made.
Should I stay away from drugs? Help.
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IAmCarles.com
79 Comments
i do all my blow off of the radiohead discz box.
the vinyl lays lil tracks for me shiite
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GAH i love you!
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naw cook it!
http://www.punchkids.net/2006/12/09/how-to-cook-crack-cocaine/
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do it off your ipod whilst listening to grandmaster flash’s ‘white lines (dont do it)’ for that extra ironeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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“Crack is whack, crack is cheap….I don’t do crack” With that said, do it on the old iphone…it’s obsolete, might as well be used for a blow tray
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guided by voices “tractor rape chain”
“parallel lines on a slow decline”
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//////////Reply by bro montana
//////////Posted October 10th, 2008 at 7:24 pm
@Kevin, greatest band. greater than the daft beatlesioheads.
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//////////Reply by matt
//////////Posted October 26th, 2008 at 10:38 pm
@bro montana, bee thousand 4evr
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worthless rattling mouth drug that makes you *think* you know 150% more about any given subject much to the dismay of the person whose attention you’re bogarting.
do mushrooms in yer AmerAppy shorts and go swimming! or drop acid and take hyper-reverse-color photos of yourself on your new iMac!
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get a supa ghetto blaster
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don’t do it man, they aren’t your real friends, hugs not drugs CRLS
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r alts allwd 2 smke weed?
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//////////Reply by cool dude
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 3:38 pm
@eric, I hope so because I smoke a pound of bud a day
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//////////Reply by andrew maccity smack
//////////Posted October 11th, 2008 at 11:06 pm
@cool dude, cool dude.
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//////////Reply by dev
//////////Posted November 8th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
@andrew maccity smack, bun that kush yo
do it off the top of urinal while listening for the sound of the bathroom door to open.
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 12:54 pm
@brendan, now THAT was funny… the perfect place right?
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don’t do coke. it make my friend brain stop and now he poops into a bag.
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oh almost forgot do it before a video shoot for a flying lotus video
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I heard electro is “s0 much better” when you are sp33dballin
(note: vodka redbull is NOT sp33dballin’, it is just a shittay drink)
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
@Quasimaki, it may not be speedballing but a shitty drink it is not. sparks taste like ass.
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//////////Reply by andrew maccity smack
//////////Posted October 11th, 2008 at 11:08 pm
@anony, sparks is dumb mainstream shit
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Yo dawg, we heard you liked coke, so we got you some coke for your coke so you can do coke off your coke while you’re doing coke.
Anyway, you’re probably so filthy rich from your HRO blogfortune you should just by a garbage bag of it and stick your head in it with a friend. Like an upside down potato sack race, only with coke.
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//////////Reply by Rambo
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 8:12 pm
@Mechrobioticon,
Can I marry you?
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
@Rambo, … but with coke.
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http://images.teamsugar.com/files/upl1/1/15111/25_2008/LC%20cell%20phone%20.larger_0.jpg
=made 4 coke
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FTW – This post is proof you still got it, Carles!
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You should totally listen to obstacle 1 by interpol
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I think you should do it. It feels fucking amazing and makes your nights extra extra fun. Also, I wanted to mention before that I want you to blog more about drugs, so if you do it, I’d be very interested to read about it.
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DON’T DO IT CARLES! If you get addicted, when will you blog?
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//////////Reply by zakkie
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 9:47 am
@Jimbo,
if crls gets addicted, he’ll blog MORE!
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“golden years” by david bowie. i am 100% right about this.
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//////////Reply by escher dashiki
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 9:59 am
@thom yorke, seconded.
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//////////Reply by Tara
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 5:18 pm
@thom yorke, yes good call!
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//////////Reply by taryn
//////////Posted May 30th, 2009 at 10:58 pm
@thom yorke,
yep or:
p diddy, bad boys 4 life.
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I am an impressionable teenage entry-level alt. This post has motivated me to start using illicit substances. What are good prices for coke? Should I steal from my parents if I can’t afford it?
Awaiting your reply,
14-year-old altbag
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//////////Reply by no
//////////Posted January 7th, 2009 at 2:51 am
@anon,
ahahahahahahaahahaahaaaahahahaahahahahahahaaaaaa
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girl talk luvs coke
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post more addrerral
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dank is about all I do, its good enough. just get some drank and dank and lose yourself, you dont need that expensive and dangerous shit
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
@asdj, I don’t know if it’s good for shows through… all i want to do is go outside and chill…
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//////////Reply by asdj
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
@anony, then stick with drank for shows, there arent much of us to begin with I dunno wanna lose anyone to bad bad drugs D:
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” ‘golden years’ by david bowie. i am 100% right about this. ”
it’s true he is right.
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i do it off my digi camera screen …
anyway listen to that first Franz Ferdinand album
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yolanda is my slutty gf.
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Olá hipsterman! aqui em Portugal, my altfriends say “Stay out of drugs” . Yesss. AltDjs & ItDudes from portugal stay out of drugs & meat. We just wanna have phun , compreende? Cheers
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You should blow some lines off: 1) an american appy’s ass while listening to this song http://www.imeem.com/people/QIXsKBL/music/Hj1OKQ2w/tantra_hills_of_katmandu/
2) or while listening to “Party all the Time” by Eddie Murphy off a Jonas Bros CD.
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Xinobi is part right. He and his Discotexans don’t do drugs or drink, but when my friends and i hung out with him, we were most definitely druggin’ it. Do coke off a crack pipe
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In our post-ironic world its almost meaningless if u do some coke or not. Just don’t become too self-indulgent, no one like a glutton. fun, but too $$$
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Don’t do coke. It will make you less authentic.
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i think i get it now. azn’s who dress up like justice for halloween, DJ the occasional loft party, do coke and think they are being just so hip are really in fact the complete opposite, and are nothing more than try-hard wanna-be-hipster-DJ’s that ruin a good scene!
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//////////Reply by coca
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 11:47 am
@anonymous,
jewstiiceses are french. you butthead. relax. your “scene” was ruined about 10 electro blog yrz ago.
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//////////Reply by anonymous
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 12:10 pm
@coca, of course the justices ARE french! that’s my point…and why it’s so lame when AZN’s dress up like justice for halloween, thinking they’re so hip and cool for doing so…when in fact they’re just try-hard wanna-be-hipster DJ lemmings. they, and the entire electro scene, are merely perversions of everything hipsterism originally stood for. if you are going to do anything actually creative, and celebrate something of actual merit, then actually write your own music instead of “remixing” and recycling something that someone else has written before you!
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//////////Reply by coca
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
@anonymous, oh i forgot you are like 600 blog yrs old and can’t appreciate electronic music or remixes…
uh wait a sec WHY are you on HRO then??
this aint aquarium drunkard.
admit you wish you could wear neon leggings and go as aladdin sane for halloween.
or is dressing up as someone else too close too a remix?
mybe you should go to halloween as 1998.
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
@anonymous, I like electro and all but there is something to be said for this. There is good and bad and i want to hear MUSIC and not some shitty beats.
//////////Reply by anonymous
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
@coca, why am i on HRO you ask? because i get it! don’t YOU get it? somehow you mistaken the subtle bitting sarcastic tone of this site as validation of the excesses of what hipsterism has become, when in fact it is in fact making a mockery of it. think Gawker’s “Blue States Lose”. why else is this site obsessed about things like authentic vs. unauthentic, alt-bro vs. alt-bag, etc. the underlying message from this site is that you are the farthest thing from hip if you think you’re hip just because you shop at american appy, dress like justice for halloween, wear shuttershades, listen to electro, and DJ the occassional loft party. all those pictures up on this site of people in “neon leggings” is not to praise and promote them you know?
you are a lemming like the frat boys and sorority girls who you would like to distance yourself from, as you simply buy into another manufactured culture just like them, and you only do something because it is “trendy” and “popular”, and not because it has actual merit. how old are you? 15? you are a part of this whole A.D.D. culture where nothing holds your attention unless someone constantly dangles something bright and shiny in your face all the time. you put modern hipsterism to shame.
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//////////Reply by Kevin
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 1:57 pm
@anonymous,
only a poser would call himself a “hipster”, FGGT.
//////////Reply by coca
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 2:03 pm
@anonymous,
sorry dude i am 28.
i nvr really wanted to be a hipster =(
H8 labels. my personal brand is much more post modern than yours :p
//////////Reply by coca
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 2:05 pm
@anonymous,
P.S. Let’s call it off anonymous. Can’t we be BFFS instead of hating??
//////////Reply by anonymous
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
@anonymous,
Please retract your claws and stand at your respective corners of the ring…if anything can be learned from this epic blog-tirade is that substance abuse will cause you to go on existential hipster-rants after binging for 5 days straight…. have a pomegranate detox shake, sit back, and think why u r getting your panties in a jumble over azns, justice, and the like when that wasn’t even the topic of this thread.
//////////Reply by Anonymous
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
@anonymous, sorry fellow anon but you are not a hipster if u argue like that online. you are mosdef mainstream.
//////////Reply by anonymous2
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 3:54 pm
@anonymous,
this previous comment was not from the original ‘anonymous’, scratch that and refer to it now as being from ‘anonymous2′
//////////Reply by Anonymous
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 3:59 pm
@anonymous2, i am the best anon though cause i actually capitalized the A. :)
//////////Reply by anonymous2
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
@Anonymous,
hahahah…this is just great. lets all do drugs and be happy :)
//////////Reply by anonymous
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
@coca, there is no hate or promotion of labels intended in what i write. i just want to make it clear to all, that although this site may appear to promote the types of people who dress up like justice for halloween, listen to electro, and wear shutter shades and florescent clothing from AA, under closer inspection, this site is really more of a social commentary that subtly mocks and derides the aforementioned people. every post on this blog pretty much points out that although these featured people may think they are being unique, different, alternative, and “authentic”, they are in fact just just buying right into the consumer culture that they desperatly seek to escape.
consider the name of this blog — hipsterRUNOFF…
Some definitions of “runoff”:
1. Eliminated waste products from manufacturing processes
2. The overflow of fluid from a container
…hence these people are an unwanted excess and an overflow of a social movement.
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//////////Reply by croqaine
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 4:16 pm
@anonymous,
only FGGTs talk about shit like ‘desprtly tryng 2 excape consumer kultur.’ some of us are just trying to get/give tugs nd ’snff a little.’
do u read ADDYBUSTIES???
//////////Reply by coca
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 5:18 pm
@anonymous,
alright alright anonymous (the real one)
sorry that you thought none of us including myself understood the mockery here.
can i still get that 8ball??
//////////Reply by Uhnonamus
//////////Posted December 20th, 2008 at 6:03 am
@anonymous, chill bro
you can read this blog anyway you want. you can do whatevathefuck you want. dont h8
blend the nany and sniff it on your iphonez
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Post moar drugs. But real drugs, please, not coke. NEVER PAY FOR COKE EVER. Do speed or shrooms or acid or 2C-B or ketamine or heroin or 4-Aco-DMT or MDMA. Not coke.
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//////////Reply by mullipster
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
@RRG,
2 all readers: 2C-B off the ipod screen plz
make sure it gets all the way up in your nose that’s how you know it’s working
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iPhone def! While listening to: The millioners-most sexiest music.
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//////////Reply by dev
//////////Posted November 8th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
@Imurfriend, altScene grlz turn me on, “lets get fucked up yal”
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coke is just caffeine for rebels with too much money. do sum real drugz like E or something. srsly yall wheres the euphoria? (HAY LOOKATME IMA DANCE ALL NIGHT AND TALK FASTER TEEHEE) lame
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tugs not drugs yall
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//////////Reply by jennybeez
//////////Posted October 8th, 2008 at 2:41 pm
@melissa, you said it girl!
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most bangers make for good coke music, carles. ladyhawke remixes feel especially lush and sexual when yr wacked.
but if yr just at home kickin’ it with yr altbr0s at the coffee table talking about “art” and other things you feel “really passionate about” then bowie is ideal. or the talking heads. old brian eno. pretty much anything with a beat between 74 and 82 works pretty good.
ps – to all of the high school kids who now read this blog: “don’t take drugz! srsly!”
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OMG CRLS,
Do C0oke only if you intend to have a tuggapalozza, and only if you can keep it up UNDERtheinFLUence.
Cautionary tale:
My middle class white friend got into COKE. He is/was an intelligent boy going for a degree in philosophy. Now he is just a boy going for a degree in philosophy whose really into Ayn Rand and making his life seem more challenging than it is. Coke won’t ruin your life, your boring and inflated ego willlllllll.
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do it while listening to ‘ride the white horse’, or that green velvet song – something about a milion pills
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I thing by the transitive-blog property, u should consider changing the running ‘ALTBRO or ALTBAG’ feature based on peoples’ pictures, to be more based on the inane shit comments people write here. Readers can then vote how ‘bro’, ‘bag’, ‘fggt’, ‘jewstice’, whatever the f label they thought that comment was.
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Fuck coke, do a post on PINGAZ – the driving force in the 2k7 electro renaissance
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The only way achieve the perfect high, is to freebase off your iphone while it is blasting a song.
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dont do it crls! would u sniff something that was in the ass of a poor girl from a third world country! telling u this cuz im from a country where people do that cuz dont have job or any chance to get one! tu blog es chevere!
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nah, we have to do it together…off the iphone!!!
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best post evr?
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Coke is pretty fun…but in order to ‘keep myself in check’ I only do it when offered. Does that make me a mooch?
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
@anonbuttsecks, yes, but I mean hey… they offered.
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funny. first time i did blow it was off my ipod
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iphone fer sure.
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted October 9th, 2008 at 1:16 pm
@fulla, can you still get those AOL CD tins? those were great.
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blow off your record player while its still spinnin.
thts straight ballin
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if i be rollergrl can i coke it up w/ you crlz? plzz <333
tugz 4 drgz?
but rlly i thnk we could lstn 2 Your Only Friend by phuture, yankno once were jst totz cokdz up. prlly can we invite lil uff & some othr bngrz 2?
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DO IT TO “FUKT” BY ME
“I DRINK
I SMOKE
I SNORT SOME COKE
I GET GET FUKT UP”
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prescriptions = th nxt blow
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do da coke and put da ipod in your ears
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doin it off the phone will serve as a postmodern eff u to poor ppl, so i gess do it that way
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PCP is the new coke, yall
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^ ^ lol.
do it off the iphone. :)
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what exactly does “DVNO” mean ?
plz hlp my personal brand of being totally clueless in a kuet quirky way isnt working as well as i had hoped =(
THNK U CRLS <4
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ps can i call u “charles” because im more comfortable with white people names….. i mean WHO ISNT???
madd propzz 4 barry’s cha cha cha chaaaangesss
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wouldn’t it be nice by the beach boys
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uhhhhhhhhhhhhh hi. i would blow off the iphone
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hello ditch the iphone
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If you’ve got to ask urself this question you shouldn’t be doing blow. If ur gonna do it do it. Jeez christ for fucksake.
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//////////Reply by tryin2findmyself
//////////Posted January 1st, 2009 at 10:17 pm
@santeezy, stfu fggt
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Jeez christ :(
For fucksake.
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I do my blow off John Legend’s face. Album cover picture. Wish it were the real thing.
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ai am barking at mein dolly four lettin me schlackel her shennanigans, barfin’ in motion pictures four BloW doonggaddanggaddang Olgoay.
do Y’all Under the Stand? Do y’all Want I 2 Re-preezent!?
ed tatem
this is how you’ll probably be if You BLOW my bro, stop following trends MAKE YOUR OWN, dont do blow cuz others do! thats lame!
p.s i cant understand a single one of you…could you TALK IN ENGLISH PLEASE!…or at least in any existing language!!
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totally off the iphone. the nano has more places you could lose valuable powder. same as off a macbook. it’ll get stuck in the crevices of the apple.
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cocaine?
no coke, PEPSI!
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do it of you ipod.. your iphone is to dirty from your finger tips to put cocaine onto. And the ipod never really touched.. come on this is common sense!haha
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everyone thinks theyre invincible as a child. growing up, you always told yourself that drugs are bad and just the thought of getting high or addiction was unthinkable. before you know it, you’re 30 years old and you’ve already done most of the things you swore you never would. marraige, kids, divorce, you’re headed nowhere, and you’re addicted to opiates. for those of you that have never had an addiction, this will bewilder you and in all actuality, make you sick. i dont understand it myself, and yes, it makes me sick too. to think that i let a chemical run my life is….atrocious. an abomination. people keep telling me that all i have to do is stop using. i wanna punch em in the mouth. if it was that easy, why then do most people who get addicted to opiates completely ruin their lives? for those of you that have or are in my situation, you’ll understand this…… i dont know how to put it….. this…prison, this…slavery we call addiction. when im dope sick, i cant even turn on the radio in my car. i find myself worrying from the time i wake up to the time i fall asleep whether ive got enough dope to last me until i get some more money. i cannot put into words how disappointed i am in myself. i was addicted to oxicontin about 8 yrs ago and i quit cold turkey with little complications. i was crushing up and snorting around 80 to 140mgs a day for two years. it helped me deal with or “not think about” all my problems. i was able to keep a job, friends, etc etc. but now i cant afford the pharmacutical path. so after being clean for 7 years, i started dating my second true love. she was all i thought about, day in, day out. about a month into the relationship, i found out that she was addicted to heroin. needless to say, i went off. then a few weeks later i caught her lying to me about her roommate… who just happened to be her exbf. well…. supposedly ex. thats another story entirely. but during the next few months, she kept puting me off, lying to me and.. well… you know the story. its classic. she loves me but… but but but. and i really really felt that i loved this girl. i knew i did. with my whole heart, i loved her. there was noone else in the world id rather be with than her. she was it. so…. like an idiot, i started buying her dope so she wouldnt have to run home in the morning cause she was sick. then, like a complete asshole, i thought i could numb the pain of being put off and emotionally abandoned by doin a little bump here and there. hell, i quit oxi’s right? i could do this too…. or so i thought. heroin is a whole other ballgame. the withdrawals are expidentially more intense. in fact, i cant even begin to explain how much worse they are. i have never shot up dope in my life. even to this day. but the past two nights, if it woulda got rid of the pain, i would have. if shooting up was the only way to end being so sick, i would have without batting an eye. i finally scored this morning and did a huge rail before i even got a block away from where i bought it. pathetic huh? ive been up for 48 hours trying to score some dope so i can sleep. and now that i have, i still cant sleep because im worried about how im gonna score tomorrow. i am living in hell. i would just assume to blow my brains all over the wall than feel that sick again. im lucky i have two little girls to keep me grounded. no, they dont live with me and im never high or dopesick around them. i do have rules i follow. id rather die than to let them find out about daddys addiction. and i mean that. i could blame all this on my ex, i could blame all this on my dealers or friends, but its my fault and mine alone. i know that. but when i talk to people about it, thats usually the first thing they say is, well… its your own fault. FUCKIN DUH!!!! i know whos fault it is. but placing blame on anyone doesnt make the sickness go away.
i hate this life. i hate how cold the world can be. and i hate drugs. not weed, just the bad ones. ive probably done every drug you can think of other than pcp or some crazy shit like that. so obviously, i got myself into something without knowing the truth about it. heroin is the big dog guys. i dont give a fuck how tough you think you are…. h will kick your candy asses. and it will strip you of any dignity, money, and direction you may have. yeah, it feels great for a little while but thats a little lesson of life you shouldnt have to learn the hard way, you cant feel that good without having to balance it out. ya feel that good/ you feel equally as bad. and thats life. thats the balance god has put on us. and i’ll tell ya sumn, if i can get through this and get clean, i WILL NEVER touch dope again. i miss all my friends. i miss my family. and i miss myself. i have always been the guy who cant take advice. ive always had to learn the hard way because i wouldnt listen…. im tired of suffering because im hardheaded. everything and everyone around me deserves better than what ive given. but when youre dopesick, all that levelheaded thinking goes right out the window. i hope none of you ever know how bad it can get. if ya wanna get high, smoke some weed or drink sumn. dont turn to heavy shit to patch what you kow the real problem is. mine was a broken heart. for others it might be boredom or curiosity. its just not worth it. and eventually, heroin will kill you. but it will take away everything you have to live for before you die.
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You should do blow off the iphone. Nice flat surface. Do NOT let your little sister or parents borrow it under any circumstance.
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I recommend you put it in a spoon, melt it and do it IV, nothing like direct sir, believe me.
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Listen to the self-titled Friendly Fires album and do one hit off of each.
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do it while listenin to CRYSTAL CASTLES
“ALICE PRACTICE”
haha.
x
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“reality used to be a friend of mine” by PM Dawn.
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yu shd do bl0w of yr ifown whl lssn 2 blghass mshp f whts yr tk n cassvts & dj dnger maus 99 prblms. tht whey, y’ll b th ultim hpppppstrrrrr & yr hd’ll xpld. fr bns pts, wher gheyfrers & psh thm gnst yr frhd.
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as someone who does blow a lot as it is a hip and cool thing to do i alwuas like getting FUKT UP i iwll give you some tips
the ihpone will be a far bettear surface than the nano due to its larger surface area etc etc
the screen of the iphone will work very well but you may worry about scratching it when lining out the blow etc, espec if u use a razor, if you do not want to risk damage to your iphone (who does?) then the silver backing wil lwork almost as well, but it will be slightly harder to see the blow etc, on the front it contrats very well etc etc
all in all my vote goes for iphone front but if ur not man enough use the back
ty
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[...] that Carles does when he decides to up the hipster ante is so painfully acute– Like “Yall. Im Thinking About Doing Blow 4the 1st Time. And of course what makes this also so rich are the spankings that Carles delivers to self-aware [...]