When I grow up, I want to work at a firm that allows me to ‘dress up’ AND wear child predator glasses.
[Photo by GaraceDore]
Sometimes I wonder what I will do when I grow up. I ‘don’t want to end up’ ‘working’ in a ‘cubicle’ and feeling meaningless, kinda like the movie ‘The Office Spaces.’ I am going to design school/liberal arts school to get a better perspective on the world. I want to be able to share this perspective with others who need help making decisions. I understand the world and/or people and/or humanity and/or ‘business.’
I am a coolhunter without even trying 2 b. Even though I do not realize it, I am on the cutting edge of ‘what’s NOW‘ in society.
I’ve read that employers like google have free buffet-style food and dry cleaning for their employees.
Should I work at google? Do they have vegan options? What can I do if I work 4 google? Can I be the guy who finds what people r looking for when they search?
Does n e other place have a progressive/zany [CUSTOMIZABLE] environment in which 2 work?
I just want an authentic place where I can work.
I want 2 work 4 a firm where I can contribute 2 humanity.
I don’t want to b ‘just another alternativeBrick in the wall.
I want to authentically bond with my coWorkers.
I want to have a lava lamp.
I want to have a progressive poster in my office that wouldn’t be allowed in most workplaces.
I want to have a starting salary of $60K per year and be able to waste half of my day on the internet.
I want to eat lunch at kute restaurants with healthy options every day.
I want to be respected within my office.
I want to have authentic conversation with my coWorkers, and not just talk abt ‘the weather’ or how my local sports team is ‘in the playoffs’ and ‘has a good shot.’
I want a workplace where I can have a sweet speaker system in my office, and blast Popular Songs from The HypeMachine which inspire coWorkers to come into my office so I can tell them about the band, then spend 15 minutes telling them about how it is authentic to find MP3s from the hypemachine because it is the ‘most authentic form of buzz’ which can be associated with a band.
///Searching 4 my dream job///
Previous Alternative Career Help coverage
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/10/what-is-the-most-authentic-alt-job.html
////help///
///need 2 grow up & make money, but still stay youthful & authentic //// \\
(Is it acceptable to wear American Appy as Business Casual?)
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IAmCarles.com
20 Comments
STRBKCS IS LGGT
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:( too close to home. read “Personal Days” and weep.
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I’m gonna be a cool english/art teacher who teaches innercity youth how to express themselves/stand up 4 wuts ‘right’
Can’t wait to talk to other teachers about how cute/stupid kids are. Also can’t wait to change the world…one lil alt at a time y’all.
“EACH ONE TEACH ONE how to remix” -girlietalk
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Bah. I’m over this wack site. Irony only goes so far, and this site is a snake eating its own tail.
When RLY not caring is the new cool alternative to not caring, you have to realize that you’re a stupid douche.
That’s the best part. You, Mr. Website Guy, are way more wickedly douched than any of the douches you call out. At least they had the sack to do something besides being douchey. You bathe in your douche, then drink the douchewater. From the rest of the world I say: fuck you, internet loser. See ya!! xxxooo
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//////////Reply by seau
//////////Posted November 13th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
Damn, you’re so totally right about all that.
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted November 15th, 2008 at 6:07 am
@KANYE GLASSES 4EVER!, You just don’t “get” HRO. carles is totally meta.
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//////////Reply by KANYE GLASSES 4EVER!
//////////Posted November 17th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
@anony, His name is “CARLES”? Like, more than one Carl? That the gayest thing I’ve ever heard.
No wonder he has to stay inside all day and come up with his clever hateration. If my name was “carles,” I’d be an internet loser, too.
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i jus want 2 be in a noise band without a record label and avoid the corporations and get money from donations only
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted November 15th, 2008 at 6:14 am
@nona, no joke, I actually saw a band last weekend that refuses to sell anything which I guess isn’t that unusual but they are making it their entire aesthetic….someone must have a trust fund. I’m all for altruism but I don’t understand how you can exist or “be” without at least a little scratch. Is your van going to drive itself to shows?
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lol
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This is for the girl in the group picture…3rd row, 2nd from right. Can you please contact me, I have some important information to discuss.
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i thnk u shld wrk 4 p4k. Tht seems ATTC n meaningfull
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I wear american appy when I see patients in the hospital (not kidding)
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//////////Reply by dev
//////////Posted November 13th, 2008 at 4:29 pm
@annony, why?
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//////////Reply by annony
//////////Posted November 14th, 2008 at 1:34 am
@dev, because patients expect at least business casual and I never have to iron am appy junk, so its pretty win win.
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted November 15th, 2008 at 6:16 am
@annony, AA is business casual now? news to me.
im moving to a commune
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That girl in the suit coat made me malt in my trousers. Now I can’t get my sack removed from my knee cap. My boss just came in and asked me to join her for a meeting and I had to walk to the conf. room hunched over so that my scrotum didn’t rip.
Everyone knows the most alt career is to be a blogger who posts about party pics and blog house tracks.
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thats what i wanted to do as well Carles, BUT i’m now working in a cubicle….get used to it
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grad school
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the author will one day searching 4 authenticity from his 9-4 job in middle management, just like his parents.
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independent film maker
american appy mngr
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i find working in a zany ad agency makes me more authentic, despite not getting paid what im worth. being able to drink when one wants, and various video games doesnt hurt either.
graphic design school FTW
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If you wanna be the guy that finds what people search for you should just work for chacha! chacha.com
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BigLaw baby!!!
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sustainable communities, green design, and new urbanizm is where its atyall… getting off the grid n out from under the heel of the MAN… livefree!
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted November 15th, 2008 at 6:19 am
@altbpro, props, that’s what the actual REAL authentic alts do…. but it’s easier to bitch and moan and grow bitter about my failed career path.
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“Just for fun he says, Get a Job!”
-Bruce Hornsby (legendary piano alt)
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