As yall know, 70% of the world’s most innovative/zany trends from from the Land of AZNS (Asia). Trends travel across the land bridge to California and Eastern Europe, eventually making their way to Middle America/mainstreamerdom within 3 years. Just wanted 2 take a look at what AZNs have been wearing & predict which trends will reach the Mexicalt population in 5 years.
Trend 1: Protect Urself From Dirty Air
As yall know, there is a lot of noise and air pollution in our world. AZNs have a lifespan that is 200% longer than white & black ppl’s natural life–they take better care of themselves than we do [via only eating fish + noodles + rice]. The AZNs are beginning to mix fashion with health safety by wearing these protective masks. They also banned fastfood in Japan after seeing the hit mockumentary Super Size Me: Fast Food Nation.
Trend 2: Bangs Which Impair ur vision [via bowl cut]/critters around ur neck
I think that bangs which impair ur vision might be big in 2k9. Bangs are theoretically functional. They ‘keep hair out of ur eyes’ and help to ‘frame ur face.’ I think taking a little bit of that functionality away might help bangs stay around forever. AZNs ‘get’ where engineering, design, and personal branding come 2gether as one. In addition, AZNs will no longer use gigapets/Tamagachis in 2k9. They will have ‘real’ pets that they can wear. These real pets will be controllable through iPod Nanos.
Trend 3: AZNs who look like this //Where the Wild Things Are
I am not sure if I will still be attracted to women if they morph into neon creatures from the hit children’s book ‘Where the Wild Things Are.’ Not sure if I support these AZNs and their zany personal brands. h8 neon azn beast glam rockers.
[Photos by StyleSightings]
But srsly yall… after we rebuilt Japan post-nuclear bomb WWII, should we have given it a new name?
Something like ‘California Pt 2′ or ‘Broville’ or ‘Gizmodo’ or ‘TechCrunchville’ or ‘The Land of Gigapets’ or ‘Trend City USA’?
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16 Comments
first yall
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I think Asia will ‘come back’ big in 2009. 06′ was hip-hop style, 07′ skinny jeans, 08′ alt going mainstrm, 09′ will see forward-thinking advances from the motherland/ land down under/ home of the brave, Asia. AZN will reign as far as our eyes can see.
Next year, mexialts will wear popped-collar lacoste (or cheap penguin knock-offs) and finally discover shutter shades. Can’t wait.
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azns are and always will be trendsetters, c’mon, you remember 2k6 with harajuku girls. how many of you went on ebay 2 find one 4sale? and now there’s zany jackets with fashion-statement hair that says “i will not see what corporations want me to see, i will see my alternative world the way i like it.” and the ipoood necklace is obsolete, make that an imac and you have ‘generic azn of 2k9′
that is all
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ohhh my goddddd
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” stop spending ur fricken money on xtube and the itunes store and get a subscription. ”
we dont spend money on xtube cause we all fuck with our friends or simply get tugged at raves and sucked at concerts.
we all download our songs from various blogs
-we never pay for them
we dont really buy food
-we only eat when its really necessary
our electric bill (or whatever) is always low cause we never open the lights. we use the light from outside (and from our mac book lappys).
we claim to be broke
-but we arent
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So my out-of-touch family members gave me $45 worth of iTunes gift cards for xmas. Not rly sure what to buy. H8 DRM so bad! Might just re-purchase a bunch of Modest Mouse songs to show how much I don’t care. Might buy some wes anderson moovies 4 my iphone.
i dno.
what are ya’ll doin 4 NYE?
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i feel kinda bad4 those azns and their lookbooks becuz the white girls are just going to poach their altsteeze in about 2.mo.
who’s aspiring2b the next on ScottSchumanBlog?
yall
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one day they gonna release a AMERICAN APPAREL shop bag with ONLY name of altcities from the nipon-island like
Tokyo/Kobe/Kyoto
Osaka/Kawasaki/
Sendai/Yokohama/Nagazaki
Wakkanai/Aomori
ps : noticed how TOKYO & KYOTO lookalike ?
do you think that ppl from these two cities share the same personal brands despite the millions of kilometers between ?
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//////////Reply by A-sven
//////////Posted December 30th, 2008 at 1:33 pm
@brian, TOKYO = KYOTO.
You. just. blew. my. mind. :)
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//////////Reply by brian
//////////Posted December 30th, 2008 at 1:54 pm
@A-sven,
no you must have misunderstood mey
look at the CRLS LTD MAP (C) 2008 :
im talking bout the KYOTO that is located between KOBE & NAGOYA
slightly @ the west of TOKYO
now
do you still think that there is a sorta “telepathic” connection like in The Sixth Sense (ft. Bruce Willis) ?
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//////////Reply by AZN BiFf
//////////Posted December 30th, 2008 at 1:35 pm
@brian,
Was this covered in Lost in Translation?
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//////////Reply by brian
//////////Posted December 30th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
@AZN BiFf,
no idea
i only watch @ tv series like “gossip girl”
….SORRY BAT DAT
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Carles, why did you remove my beloved
Austin Style Watch from ur street fashion blogs?? It’s better than any of the shit links you have listed!!
This is the most offended I’ve ever been… this is the maddest I ever will be. I’m typing so fucking hard I might break my fucking Mac book Air!!!!!!!!
-Yeezy
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I guess Carles has decided that AZNs will survive into 2k9. This is correct and their branding will become so extreme that it’ll be virtually impossible for Mexialts to adapt, further marginalizing them in the shadows.
It’s oppression pure and simple.
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POST MOAR OF THE ANIMALS COLLECTIVES PLEASE.
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I predict otaku fags to discover merzbow and masonna
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let’s be serious. it’s not ASIA that is the alt mecca of the world. it’s JAPAN. specifically TOKYO. maybe OSAKA. so let’s just replace all “AZN” references in this post to “JPN.”
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//////////Reply by noremorse
//////////Posted December 31st, 2008 at 5:48 am
@focker, yee
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Tokyo is full of manbabies, sociopaths and shit.
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dear carles (u r dumb),
they did not ban fast food in jaypan and those girls hairs arent as bad as u r sayin. it is like scene kid hair except better and innovative. plz dont get too drunk off of sPaRkZ tonight (i expect a blog on jan 1st) luv u
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asian will have pigen toes and bowlegs, but never in concert. i think angled stances will be in. daria definitely needs reprisal
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