We will never forget you Sparks. [miss u]
We will have 1 last night with you.
We will buy an entire case of Sparks
and drink you until we cry
orange tears
Men, women, and children
will drink you
like it is the last drop of water/cum/gasoline
on God’s Orange Earth
We will put our tongues together
(stained with orangest, sunniest delight)
and remember
our glory days.
We /// were /// electro soldiers.
In this picture, there are 6 BFFs having a memorable night, getting buzzed with a group of their closest friends. Mainstreamers can only see 5 people, but authentic alts see Sparks as a bro.
[Photos by TakeoverTokyo]
SRSLY tho…
Is SPARKS the new HEATH?
What would u do if u had the last case of Sparks in the world?
Plz continue 2 send in yalls Sparks Tributes.
This is a mourning process.
(kind of like when some1 u know dies, and their myspace/facebook page is still active and people write ‘miss u’ on their walls)
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IAmCarles.com
40 Comments
Oh man that’s my hangover helper… I mean how am expected to go to work without a sparks or two? What’s next… outlaw bean burritos and aspirin? Damn you corporate responsibility!!! Damn you to hell!!!
Oh and if I had the last case of sparks on earth… I would bury it in my backyard and wait for the apocalypse..
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crls my birthday is on christmas and this year i think i’m just going end my life.
Last year for my 18th bday I woke up to hear the sound of my stepdad and brother packing up their suitcases to leave to go to Pittsburgh (my stepdads family). I asked them where they were going, and my stepfather came in close to my face and whispered in my ear you will be 19 next year, then left. When I walked into the living room it was littered with ripped gold paper from my brothers various xbox360 and wii games. I didn’t receive a damn thing and I had no idea where the fuck my mom was, and didn’t find out for another 3 days. When she finally came home after alcoholic binge she gave me a VHS copy of Blow. WTF we don’t even own a tape player. She then told me she was waiting for me to be old enough to tell me that she doesn’t really know who my bio-father is. (its between 3 guys). The guy doing 15-life might not be my dad, and I might be Jewish.
CRLS I have had it with my family, what is the altest way to die?
Seeing that I was born on christmas and apparently a Jew, should I hang my self from a cross? or poison myself in my neighbors front lawn nativity scene in the place of baby jesus?
Sparks was my only release and now its gone :( CRLS I just don’t want to live to see another bday/xmas.
C.Y.O.D
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//////////Reply by monster
//////////Posted December 23rd, 2008 at 9:20 pm
@Saddest Girl on ERF, You seriously need to get some help before your bday / xmas. If youre trying to be funny, you seriously need to get some help with your jokes before you talk.
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted December 23rd, 2008 at 9:59 pm
@monster, I’m pretty sure it’s just malt liquor and orange crush.
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//////////Reply by InnyVinny
//////////Posted December 23rd, 2008 at 10:52 pm
@Saddest Girl on ERF, screw ‘em. Get some Joose, move to NY or LA and everything will work out. Promise.
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//////////Reply by studio231
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 12:57 am
@Saddest Girl on ERF, dont know u but id miss u. nothing gold can stay, not even sparks
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//////////Reply by onewoolsock
//////////Posted February 1st, 2009 at 3:20 pm
@Saddest Girl on ERF, its OK, I share your pain. Don’t worry, it gets better (via getting worse first).
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still cant stop crying orange out of my nose. i bought all the sparks from my favorite liquor store and the kutey that takes my money thought i was crazy so i added a bud light lime.
took your idea Crls and im brewing my own. got 2 ten gallon fishtanks distilling in my jetta trunk of crunk filled with monsters and gordon and high life . when i drive through the snow it gets mixedup like my life
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sparks is the ultimate cure for whiskey dick. now wtf are we supposed to do?
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so /// bummed
nvr realize what yalls got til its gone.
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hahahahahahaha x100
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So I met this girl who worked at Starbucks, and I worked up the courage to ask her on a date after a couple of conversations at the register. She was a month older than me but I didn’t really care, she was fun to be around. So we took a walk along the beach, and we kissed in the pale moonlight, a full moon, it was really romantic. We started really getting into it, and she slowly unzipped my jeans, she reaches inside and starts kissing her way down my chest, she finally gets all the way down, looks up at me with the most seductive eyes I’ve ever seen and says “No thanks, I had Reese’s for breakfast” and I’m like “No way, you had candy for breakfast?” She replies, “Not candy! Reese’s puffs cereal!” So she sliiiiides me a bowl. I crunch into it and WHAM! My mouth goes crazy! That smooth combo of peanut butter and chocolate-y taste attacking my taste buds! She zips my pants back up and says “And it’s part of this complete breakfast!”
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted December 23rd, 2008 at 9:57 pm
@anon, Oh yeah… you win the comments for sure.
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//////////Reply by tommy yorke
//////////Posted December 23rd, 2008 at 11:10 pm
@anon, LMAO
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2002 – 2008 it was a great run.
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Is this actually serious? Because all these damn posts really make me want to have a sparks… and I NEVER drink the stuff. Are we the unwitting participators in a sparks viral marketing campaign?
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s0 fun!
really 2002-2009 though…
the party’s not over bros!
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where r all the xmas posts crles?? u rnt jewish r u???
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a musical ode to sparks:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=2229078
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Haha. Man. I didn’t think Sparks was that great when I tried it, but you sure do have some crazy pics of it.
I assure you that nobody at http://www.hipsterwave.com drinks that stuff! :-)
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//////////Reply by altvbrolookingforafi
//////////Posted December 23rd, 2008 at 11:04 pm
@j.p., you are a fucking retard if you dont think sparks is delicious
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//////////Reply by j.p.
//////////Posted December 23rd, 2008 at 11:07 pm
@altvbrolookingforafi, Haha. I’ll give it another try. It’s still only available in just the one flavor, right? :-p I’m not a fucking retard just because I have an opinion! Jeez.
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//////////Reply by altvbrolookingforafi
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 3:39 am
@j.p., its available in 3 flavors 5%, 6%, and 7%. If your opinion was that ethnic cleansing is kwel you would be a retard. same goes with not liking sparks, it’s just not an option.
//////////Reply by j.p.
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 3:44 am
@j.p., lol. I’ll go with the 7% for maximum crunk. :-) dang it.
//////////Reply by scientologist
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 5:50 pm
@altvbrolookingforafi,
i srsly wish ppl like u would stfu
or od on alcohol + coke
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p.s. I just discovered the best energy drink today. It’s called Spike and it is delicious and has 300mg of caffeine up in it. No booze though. ;-[
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where can you buy sparks like that? I’ve only seen it in the 4-can pack. i need to stock up to survive the electrowinter
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that night was legit… sparkzz totally came through… saved the night… sparks is the new drink for 2009…
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//////////Reply by sanchez speaks
//////////Posted December 23rd, 2008 at 11:08 pm
@jamesisskeletron, sharing is caring!!!!!!
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it’s like banning semen! i mean water!
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Oh wait.. they’re still gonna make it.. just gonna change the recipe.. like new coke… and that shit rocked!
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typical of u yanks to martyr a shitty frankenstein alcopop
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//////////Reply by anon
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 3:37 am
yes it is exactly that
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i didn’t realize it turned your tongue orange!
or is that just after you drink 8 cans?
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i went thru the grieving process and had a sparks bday
but joose has been here all along guys
<3 underdogs
i mean joose:sparks::alt:mainstream
and when i make that analogy i mean it’s like 2% more abv
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where the fuck can i buy an entire case of sparks [in LA]????!!!!
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//////////Reply by robobro
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 3:41 am
@human after y’all, I can’t find it in sf either.
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//////////Reply by Steve
//////////Posted January 22nd, 2009 at 9:30 pm
@robobro, i know where sparks in sf is.
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Sparks is for posers.
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//////////Reply by robobro
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 3:42 am
@Steve, ur a fag
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//////////Reply by Steve
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 3:52 am
@robobro, “you are” a fag
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//////////Reply by Teh Anomususses
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 6:25 am
@Steve, WHY YOU GOTTA TROLL US AUTHENTIKZ??
H8r JUST YOU SUCK ON SOME MNSTRM ZEMAZ!!!11111111111111!!!//!!!
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//////////Reply by The Pinko Commie
//////////Posted December 25th, 2008 at 6:34 am
oh shizzz, thats wut you hipster fucks r goin to 2 crazy on now innit? haaaaaaaahaaaaa
ZIMMMMMAAAAAA! whoooo!
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//////////Reply by Steve
//////////Posted December 26th, 2008 at 3:08 am
@The Pinko Commie, zima is making a comeback!
//////////Reply by j.p.
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
@Steve, What are they posing for?
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//////////Reply by AnonAnonymous
//////////Posted December 25th, 2008 at 8:12 am
@j.p., party pics duh
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//////////Reply by Steve
//////////Posted December 26th, 2008 at 3:07 am
@AnonAnonymous, duh
ive never been subjected to this feeling before, but this hro post has made me come to terms that: i want to be friends with these bros+borads. love that they all wear the same panties. love that they chill is vans with sparks. love them. this is my new years resolution.
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//////////Reply by jamesisskeletron
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 5:15 am
@The Man in the Hat, come to sacramento… its how we roll… ALTsparkzzzzz
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//////////Reply by The Man in the Hat
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 3:00 pm
@jamesisskeletron, well with the recent deflux in sparks as part of my budget, i can afford an ammy tracky ticket[from sf]
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Pour it down the toil-it.
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iCarly = carls = you
….whaaat?!?!
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Since there is no Sparks in germany, i never had the real taste of it. i never was a real altbro. i h8 myself. i go back to emo.
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I’ve never had Sparks — not a Miami thing? But I’m ready for the Electro-Wars, yall.
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The liqour stores here only sell it in single cans. I had to visit the store like 15 times just to get 30 of them yesterday. Just want to find a 24 pack.
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if you want the 24 pak like we got just ask whatever store owner yr buyin them from if you can buy their entire supply or ask them specifically for the 24 pak. believe me they will be all too happy to make that big of a sale.
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those kids look like retards. sparks = being 30 and looking trashy?
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//////////Reply by j.p.
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 3:14 pm
@wut, Those kids look 30 to you? You must be young!
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//////////Reply by wut
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 5:06 pm
@j.p., it looks like an old man with little girls and gays 2 me
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//////////Reply by j.p.
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 5:14 pm
@wut, yeah but they just look old ’cause of their beards. i seriously doubt anybody in those pics is older than 26-28!
//////////Reply by wut
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 5:17 pm
@j.p., 28 is almost 30. i wonder if they can pay their child support after buying all that booze.
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//////////Reply by j.p.
//////////Posted December 24th, 2008 at 5:19 pm
@wut, lol. and i bet you’re like 22 or 23. just barely past the legal drinking age, if even that old. SUCKER!
http://www.hipsterwave.com
was wondering how long itd take you to pickup on Sparks’ doomed end
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Too much Sparks advertising Crls. Starting to get suspicous.. hmm..
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ha
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I made a Sparks armband.
You can see it here…
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=71606&l=6fd60&id=1108202753
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We are burying a 4-pack in the back yard for the future. I love you Sparks.
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Dudes and braz, in L.A you can get it in the valleys, and in the hoodz. you just have to be a choice mutherfker to get’m where they be at.
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I wish they had Sparks over here :[
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we still have sparks where i live..
cred?
does that make WI alt since that is where i am from?
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The first time I met sarah morrison she couldnt find her sparks and she was like “omg wheres my sparks,who has my sparks Give it back or i’ll beat you up!”
dead srs
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