[Photo by Lastnitesparty]
Transitioning into a new year is all about [UNCERTAINTY]. Will gimmicks from previous years work in 2k9? For example, will alternative men still be [HIGHLY INTERESTED] in searching for the perfect pair of alternative breasts? I don’t think they will. I think most men might become ‘a lil bit bi’ in 2k9, and start looking for a few more nut/shaft slips.
[Photo by icanteachyouhow2doit]
In 2k8, most of my male readership pretended to be ‘grossed out’ by the sight of __% of a peen. However, in 2k9, they will utilize the ZOOM feature of their Macbooks [CTRL+SCROLL] in order to ‘get a better peep’ at alternative junks.
2k9 will be all about experimentation and testing new sexual boundaries. Kinda like a softcore porno television series on cable television. It’ll be ‘about sex’ but it won’t be raunchy. It will be sensual, and the former ‘tug’ experience will be about connecting with some1 on a spiritual+emotional+meaningful level.
2k9 will be all about serious relationships.
(I might be wrong. I’m just scared and looking 4 stability. What is 2k9 gonna b all abt?)
Previous Mummified Alt
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/11/modern-mummification-processes.html
Previous peen coverage
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/10/last-nights-lil-tug.html
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/07/nut-slips-are-the-new-nip-slips.html
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/10/who-has-the-most-authentic-altpenis-some-fggt.html
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/08/4-the-ladies-who-like-red-heads.html [GINGER PEEN]
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IAmCarles.com
19 Comments
thanks for teaching me that zoom feature crls
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//////////Reply by internt
//////////Posted December 13th, 2008 at 10:26 am
@thatshowitis, just got super duper freakd out by zooming
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//////////Reply by IN DA CLUB
//////////Posted December 13th, 2008 at 12:05 pm
@internt,
IF YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS COOL, try holding down [ctrl+option+command/apple+8]
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//////////Reply by DJ Panda
//////////Posted December 13th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
@IN DA CLUB, totes was scared my screen would freeze like that, just like my alt-Macintosh-mom used to warn me about. Prtty cool, tho.
i like tits but i also like dick a bit too
am i bi?????? or ghey>??? s0 confused.
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TRANNYS
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total GS.
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miss u
dankvibe.wordpress.com/
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What is up with crls pix looking like they are melting? Remeber melted face girl from “tweens w/ macbookies”
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//////////Reply by The Man In The Hat
//////////Posted December 12th, 2008 at 9:39 pm
@The Man In The Hat,
this is of course refering to that guys abs.
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bros cant B-bi. only ghey.
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carles you are so right, why just this week I had my first bro on bro snuggle/peen tug/manly makeout. and it’s not even 2k9 yet. I am so ahead of the curve on this but just barely. anyway he was hot, and my ex gfs best friend,but then again she was in the other room snuggling with her best GIRL friend. holy crap, we are all so with it. anyway his foreskin grossed me out and it felt a little weird touching another dudes dick, having only ever felt mine before. so I guess I’m a little bi, but now that I’ve had some bi-revenge on my ex for dumping me I’m planning on back to lady-sex, cuz it’s so soft and wet, not scratchy like a mans unshaven face. I’m travelling to Tel Aviv and Berlin in Dec 2k8/Jan 2k9, where there will be lots of sweet alt titties to squeeze, or so I hear. so riddle me this, Carles, where should I go to party in. Berlin?! <3 u, but not in a sexual way. you help me make my alt life make sense. HRO fo EVA.
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http://www.nowtoronto.com/lifestyle/story.cfm?content=166405
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CRLS, you’ve never been so right in ur life.
p.s. CNTRL SCRLL! Feel more connected to my macbook now.
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i am post human.
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alt tittahs + TP = nvr get old.
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2muchpeen.
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excited about more peen in 2k9
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Will 2k9 bring on the search for the perfect pair of alt test.s?
s0 exicted, ya’ll!
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i’m scared 2 man. no one has jobs or can get jobs rite now. can’t afforrd brests so we’re gonna have to start buying peen. we need more jobs with more money so people can buy more stuff again.
<3 Capitalism yall <3
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by far the hottest peen post to date
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I thought that the thumb of the guy pulling the pants was that guy’s peen. hahaha.
I h8 u.
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i really do want 2k9 to be about “serious relationships” but it will most likely continue to be about text-dating, semi-meaningful cuddle/sex sessions involving joints, piano ballades and adult portions of whiskey. meh, not so bad i guess.
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//////////Reply by melissa
//////////Posted December 15th, 2008 at 10:45 am
@escher, miss u
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//////////Reply by escher
//////////Posted December 15th, 2008 at 11:09 am
@melissa, miss you so hard! can we cuddle before i go home? can we live out our friendship in the HRO comments section?
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//////////Reply by melissa
//////////Posted December 15th, 2008 at 11:13 am
@escher, when do you leave? do you want to see dark dark dark tomorrow at cake shop? thats like the only night im free this week. :(
//////////Reply by escher
//////////Posted December 15th, 2008 at 11:26 am
@melissa, i leave JFK on Thursday eve but I’m seeing nutcracker with the Iraqi and the Egyptian tomorrow eve! maybe i can snake my way over to C shoppe afterward? i need you in my arms soon.
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//////////Reply by melissa
//////////Posted December 15th, 2008 at 11:30 am
@escher, who is the egyptian? the sake chop website says dark dark dark goes on at 10pm, but it’ll really be more like 10:30, i assume. come? i’ll crack yer nut.
//////////Reply by escher
//////////Posted December 15th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
@melissa, he’s bjorn’s salty husband. i am definitely going to try and hit the 10 spot and maybe bring my united colors of benneton-esque group along as well (a frenchi, and indian and i’m not sure what Amber is? just human probs). can we have a joint wedding with dark dark dark that night?
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//////////Reply by melissa
//////////Posted December 15th, 2008 at 12:30 pm
@escher, of course. i get dibs on the dude from new kids on the block.
remember when mtv had the ~10 spot~? and they aired shows like fanatic, making the video, 2gether (the series!) and undressed. miss u 1998.
//////////Reply by thATCHER
//////////Posted December 15th, 2008 at 3:27 pm
@escher,
<3 yall
mayb we can men-on-g-twa?
//////////Reply by 1998
//////////Posted December 15th, 2008 at 1:17 pm
@melissa, miss you too
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//////////Reply by melissa
//////////Posted December 15th, 2008 at 3:17 pm
@1998, miss u so bad.