Product Review: The new iPhone

In an effort to stay modern and current, I will start reviewing more gizmos and gadgets. It's just part of the modern world, yall. If u want 2 be interesting, u have to 'want' new 'communication devices' and stuff like that. Having a phone with web browsing capabilities may or may not be more important than owning Merriweather Post Pavillion. This is a post about technology cuz we are living in the modern world where people start to want gadgets that they read about at tech rumor blogs.

Product Name: iPhone Raw Nano
Manufacturer: Apple
Lead Designer: Steve Jobs, an JAPANAZN bro, and a swiss coolhunting blogger
Photograph:

Overall grade: 4 out of 5 AZN sweatshop tweens
Review: The iPhone Raw is Steve Jobs'es answer to the Google Blackberry phone. As opposed to focusing on what Google does better, it tried to appeal to an older audience, focusing on the 'book reading' aspects of the iPhone, stripping away features like the actual telephone and the vibrant application market. In addition, there is no longer storage for mp3s or windows media files.

However, the new iPhone is a lot like a book. U can download books, and read them. In order to be a 'greener' product, the new iPhone does not have a colour display, nor does it have a multitouch or single-touch screen. In order to challenge existing design constructs and get us back to our glory days, there are a lot of buttons, and an entire keyboard. There is no facebook access on this device, but they are working on a Twitter fixpack.

I can see this new iPhone appealing to a lot of authentic tech heads who understand design and 'want to get back to basics.' U might also want 2 get one for ur parents as they grow older and still love to read books. Kinda confused about what I would do with it, but I'm sure it comes with some cool games like Solitaire, Spider Solitaire, Jezzball, Snake, Ski Fri, or Battle Chess.

Apple has once again mastered design and identified a need that we didn't even know we wanted. Kinda like when the iPhone came out and I waited in line for 30 days to make sure I got one. Then I took a poop and used my phone while feces dropped out of my body. It was a metaphor.

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Carles is a Tech Beat Writer for HIPSTERRUNOFF.com and a contributor to TechBros Magazine.

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Are yall gonna get an iPhone?
OR do u think ur gonna have some1 put a desktop computer in2 ur tummie?