In an effort to stay modern and current, I will start reviewing more gizmos and gadgets. It’s just part of the modern world, yall. If u want 2 be interesting, u have to ‘want’ new ‘communication devices’ and stuff like that. Having a phone with web browsing capabilities may or may not be more important than owning Merriweather Post Pavillion. This is a post about technology cuz we are living in the modern world where people start to want gadgets that they read about at tech rumor blogs.
Product Name: iPhone Raw Nano
Manufacturer: Apple
Lead Designer: Steve Jobs, an JAPANAZN bro, and a swiss coolhunting blogger
Photograph:
Overall grade: 4 out of 5 AZN sweatshop tweens
Review: The iPhone Raw is Steve Jobs’es answer to the Google Blackberry phone. As opposed to focusing on what Google does better, it tried to appeal to an older audience, focusing on the ‘book reading’ aspects of the iPhone, stripping away features like the actual telephone and the vibrant application market. In addition, there is no longer storage for mp3s or windows media files.
However, the new iPhone is a lot like a book. U can download books, and read them. In order to be a ‘greener’ product, the new iPhone does not have a colour display, nor does it have a multitouch or single-touch screen. In order to challenge existing design constructs and get us back to our glory days, there are a lot of buttons, and an entire keyboard. There is no facebook access on this device, but they are working on a Twitter fixpack.
I can see this new iPhone appealing to a lot of authentic tech heads who understand design and ‘want to get back to basics.’ U might also want 2 get one for ur parents as they grow older and still love to read books. Kinda confused about what I would do with it, but I’m sure it comes with some cool games like Solitaire, Spider Solitaire, Jezzball, Snake, Ski Fri, or Battle Chess.
Apple has once again mastered design and identified a need that we didn’t even know we wanted. Kinda like when the iPhone came out and I waited in line for 30 days to make sure I got one. Then I took a poop and used my phone while feces dropped out of my body. It was a metaphor.
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Carles is a Tech Beat Writer for HIPSTERRUNOFF.com and a contributor to TechBros Magazine.
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Are yall gonna get an iPhone?
OR do u think ur gonna have some1 put a desktop computer in2 ur tummie?
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IAmCarles.com
21 Comments
that pregnant woman is the most disgusting thing i’ve ever seen
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ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
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In order to stay “in touch” with all of his bros Carles owns a rotary phone where he makes meaningful calls about “realness” and not allowing his “behavior” be determined by new technologies.
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You spelled ‘colour’ like an international-
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//////////Reply by david
//////////Posted February 12th, 2009 at 5:44 pm
@Partyrep,
carles was born in spain
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//////////Reply by umno
//////////Posted February 12th, 2009 at 7:55 pm
@david,
Crls is Australian!
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//////////Reply by natalee hologram
//////////Posted February 13th, 2009 at 4:55 pm
@umno,
carles was born inside a maze in crete, a product of minotaur-rape
” In addition, there is no longer storage for
However, the new iPhone is a lot like a book. ”
smooth carles.
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Is that you Carles?: http://www.youtube.com/user/Pruane2Forever
Relevant cultural “commentary”. Sexman is a metaphor.
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//////////Reply by SilverTell
//////////Posted February 12th, 2009 at 5:16 pm
@Cameronr, no this is
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIUUxqP9sM8
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//////////Reply by Switters
//////////Posted February 13th, 2009 at 9:47 am
@Cameronr, hahaha
LISA NEEDS BRACES…
…
DENTAL PLAN…
“i dont need to be called frickin jawsis (???) er whatever”
LAWLING
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NUTHING to do with the post (didn’t read it, ew preggers)
but have you heard of breaking open the head a psychadelic journey of one bros journey from hipster to TRUE ALT BRO (via drugz/foreign countries)
well i’m only 20 pages in so, I don’t know much but…that’s what it seems like so far
CRLSESSSSS
miss u in 2k9!
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OH MY GODDDDDDDDddd
how many babies are IN HER
wtf
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//////////Reply by SilverTell
//////////Posted February 12th, 2009 at 5:18 pm
@*****, i noes srsly
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SO LIKE IS THIS A JOKE?
I DONT GET IT
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I want to have sex with the octoplet mom right in her mouth.
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love ipHone.
love iTouch(ipod touch?).
love apples.
love stevey jobs.
love my macbook.
love 2 kindle.
h8 my parents.
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thats hot shit
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that thing is about to pop.
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h8 Octuplet Mom. No one should be allowed to have a total of 14 children, not even you Crls.
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//////////Reply by (bad) Joker
//////////Posted February 12th, 2009 at 8:09 pm
@umno, H8.
All 14 are named Claedus….. when asked “what happens when you want to talk to them individually” the mother replied “that’s easy, I just use their surnames”
LAME
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That stomach is super scary…
And the Amazon Kindle is killing the legacy of books! :/
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crls
that bitch is totes nasty.
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my kindle 2 (/iPhone?) arrives the 25th.
HRO on the go with the basic and ‘experimental’ browser.
I’d only get to see that woman in 16 grey colours, but in this case I really don’t need MORE detailed stretch marks.
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new iPhone is ok, but the Jitterbug is more authentic/BACK TO BASICS
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I saw that on Oprah. <3/h8 her.
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is this post secretly about m.i.a?
ps: jessauthentic=amycore??
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//////////Reply by Jessicauthentic.
//////////Posted February 13th, 2009 at 2:59 am
@trapdinsubrbiabroad, who’s amycore?
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//////////Reply by Yo_Fo'_Shit?
//////////Posted February 14th, 2009 at 7:20 am
@Jessicauthentic., You don’t know who amycore is?
and yet you read this blog and claim to be “authentic”
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looks like boy george’s veiny melonous cranium.
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