Photo by The Style Shark
I was at a strip club, and I got kinda sad. There were a bunch of strippers who were ‘dancing 4 monopoly money’ since times are so hard. I guess maybe they get to exchange the monopoly money 4 drugs/uppers, or whatever strippers do in their backrooms. Maybe they just have ‘low self-esteem’ so the Monopoly $ is like a ‘pat on the back’, or just ‘letting them know that they are ‘good enough’ ‘ for some1, even if it is some kreepy overweigh bro, who just wants to ‘accidentally cum’ in his pants.
Do yall feel like people who go to ’strip clubs’ are desperate? do u think they are only for ‘fat people’ who ‘wear baggy jeans’ and buy ‘expensive cars that they pay for over the course of 10 years’ in which they ‘cruise around’ and listen to ‘hip hop’ and live in ’sad apartment complexes’?
do u ever feel alone, then go 2 a strip club with an iPod which is preloaded with a meaningful playlist of indie + alternative hits? What do u put on ur playlist?
Would yall be sad if ur daughter ‘grew up 2 be a stripper’? Wouldn’t yall rather have her do something honorable that was salaried and had health benefits? would yall rather ‘buy a lapdance’ or ’surf the internet for pornographic videos’?
‘do not pass go. go directly 2 jail, yall.’ -The Monopobros, a new indie band
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31 Comments
first?
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//////////Reply by corydan
//////////Posted March 13th, 2009 at 6:59 pm
@corydan, HELL MOTHERFUCKING YEAH BRO.
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//////////Reply by shit
//////////Posted March 13th, 2009 at 8:03 pm
Is she shitting out a leg?
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//////////Reply by louis
//////////Posted March 13th, 2009 at 9:30 pm
@shit, its peen, cnt u see the big vein?
h8 u shebro for ‘confusing’ me
what if my daugher was just ‘expressing her sexuality’ in a way that is ‘liberated’?
right now i am a cool alt without kids but if i evr took the meaningful step of ‘creating life’ i would encourage my daughter to an alt-career like stripping for monopoly money.
sure first i would warn her against it but then i bet she’d say ‘mom just tryin 2b me’ and how could i say no when i have spent all my life building my ‘persnal brand’ and getting paid 2b me….
just wish i don’t have kids lol… then i couldn’t go to alt shows anymore because i would go from being ‘almost too old’ to ‘rlly too old…..’ and i wouldn’t have ‘meaningful experiences’ tuggin altbros to MGMT….
//ne1 else?
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//////////Reply by Bromosexual
//////////Posted March 15th, 2009 at 7:45 am
@Leigh, It’s like you put a camera to my brain
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i use monopoly money for everything, so at the strip club, it’s just normal…
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If the girl whose ass is in that pic is reading this, please contact me: i will give you my Hotel on Park Place if you will let me toss your salad. My tongue isn’t very long but it has ‘girth’. Thanks.
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So wait- is this blog supposed to be ‘funny’ or ‘interesting’?
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i have a cousin who is mnstrm, like he drinks Miller Genuine Draft and listens to The Velvet Revolvers, anyway he explained to me that strip clubs each have their own fake brand of money so that drunk men don’t realize how much united states dollhairs they are putting into thongs. This phenomenon is unknown to carles, hence the Mr. Bean-like humor of the post [citation needed].
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//////////Reply by durhay
//////////Posted March 14th, 2009 at 4:26 pm
@stev, Dollhairs = Pete and Pete reference? If so, gold.
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Is the bow-tie thong avail. at Am Ap? / Are there really stripclubs taking Monopoly money? / Where are the clubs?
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ps: her bum has strange lashes on right cheek = alt-lady-stripper. (doin’ it normal-lady-style = mainstream).
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//////////Reply by lolz
//////////Posted March 13th, 2009 at 7:47 pm
@chorles, i think they might be smack marks
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btw guys i wasn’t sure what was between her legs, though i was sure it wasn’t a penis, anyway if anyone else is wondering i’m pretty sure it’s some part of a man’s leg or an arm, if you can figure out what part of what limb and from what angle, please share
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//////////Reply by monster
//////////Posted March 14th, 2009 at 9:33 am
@stev, srsly, what is that?
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c4rles, it depends on the stripper…
…when I strip, I usually do it for free – is that ‘alt’?
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//////////Reply by louis
//////////Posted March 13th, 2009 at 8:38 pm
@t4yo, totes if u do it on the sidewalk of a busy street n a majr city
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The U.S. dollar IS Monopoly money.
Why do you think gold is $1,000 an ounce?
Hey, at least irony is cheap!
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I just want a girl I can ‘pay’ to be with.
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(I make sure to not take away jobs from someone who needs to strip in order to support themselves/their kids)
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obvi she uses the mono $ to buy powdered sugar to put up her nose. then gets ‘arrested’ by the bro who sold it to her and handcuffed to the bed.
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Wow, I’m watching Johnny Mnemonic for the first time, and I gotta say………..it’s really bad.
I know this has nothing to do with this blog so stfu
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i think they’re also for skinny pale guys who are little too into classic rock and the white stripes. my ex.
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jesus, i ‘love’ the way u ‘use’ inverted commas.
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Have yall ever snorted coke [Via a monopoly $20]??? Ever with a stripper?
Me=both
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//////////Reply by bitcr
//////////Posted March 14th, 2009 at 9:19 pm
@Citizen Science, more alt to use a $1000000 note from Zimbabwe.
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//////////Reply by Citizen Science
//////////Posted March 15th, 2009 at 9:19 am
@bitcr,
Is Cholera Alt? Probably would be making a statement to get it.
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//////////Reply by bitcr
//////////Posted March 15th, 2009 at 1:56 pm
@Citizen Science, Yeah, if the statement you wish to make is “I’m poor and like to drink shitwater”. AIDS is gonna be Alt again in 2k____ The 80s are back, yall.
it’s either b/c of the economy or because it’s just plain easier
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alts=sheepish about strip clubs
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strip clubs are kinda awkwrd, and a lil scary. i went with some of my broz, and 1 of them payed for sexxx and another pay’d for a beej. i was a lil worried about the crowd i hung with, so we went to a party at a house in da city after. no alts at the party… just peeple with gunz//
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i only take my apple accessories with to strip clubs to do blow off of, but i might put on a meaningful track to accompany on occasion.
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too bad you got kicked out of school, this blog won’t be able to support you considering it’s getting worse and worse.
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those are his legs (shins) crossed. they look very skinny due to the angle
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i put out for a can of sparks.
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uppers have been out since like 08.8. blog more opiates.
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i hope somewhere there is a alt strip club, where you have to be “cool” and “unique” to get in an all the girls look like they’re about to pass out from having to many tattoes on their body preventing them from obtaining vitamine d
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Carles you told me you wouldn’t share this with the world. I feel sad. I feel betrayed. Even with the paper bag over your face, the leg shares a meaning with me.
Your lipstick on my ass is all I need to remember.
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I want to go to a strip club where the altstripper moves to AnCo.
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I do this all the time.
This is my latest meaningful playlist of indie + alternative hits preloaded onto my iPhone Nano.
Calvin Harris – I’m Not Alone (Deadmau5 Remix)
Shit Robot – Lonely Planet
Ryksopp – Miss It So Much
Dizzee Rascal – That’s Not My Name (Ting Tings cover)
Little Boots – Day N’ Nite (Kid Cudi Cover)
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sex
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//////////Reply by حازم
//////////Posted August 12th, 2009 at 12:31 pm
@حازم,
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