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This is a blog post about the popular meme The Hipster Grifter.
There once was an AZN from Utah
Who had dreams of moving to the city
breaking free of her oppressive (and possibly sexually abusive) Mormon parents who adopted her
and working for a relevant entertainment/media company (via Vice Magazine)
and most importantly 'fucking a lot of dudes' who were 'hot indie bros'
She lied a lot
Pretended she had cancer and was gonna die
Just so people would 'feel sad for her'
Stole money, credit cards, checks, and cell phones from bros who 'got to put their penis inside of her vagina'
She sexted them and was aggressive
Understanding what a bro truly needs
which is the security of knowing that a girl wants to 'be fucked'
Was the kind of person who creepily 'really wanted 2 hang out with u'
and actually followed through and called u 100 times
Think she would have benefited from 'the dorm environment'
at a small Liberal Arts College
instead of sending aggressive sexts to bros all the time
I actually knew her while I was living in Brooklyn
We met each other at McCarren Pool
I was wearing Old Navy board shorts
and she came up to me and told me
'I want to pull ur penis out through ur short-hole
and give u a blow and a tug'
I was immediately turned on because that was back when my 'Yellow Fever'
was at its absolute worst
I also saw that she had 'a rowdy chest tattoo' and I immediately got
erotic visions of 'cumming on that shit'
We went back to my place and we watched a popular French New Wave indie classic film
I was impressed by her career and her knowledge of everything relevant
Eventually she 'had sex with me' - 2fast & 2furiously
The bed was making the sound of the sample in the popular song "Paper Planes"
But it was the kind of thing where I 'lost interest in having sex with her'
because it was the 'sad' kind of dirty sex
where u feel like a girl is 'down to do anything'
because she is 'all sad on the inside'
and feels like the only way she knows how to 'feel good about herself'
is when there is 'some bro's cock inside of her'
I am a meaningful bro and 'don't want to be just another bro'
So my peen went limp
And I took her out for a meal
and reassured her that I 'wanted a real, emotional relationship' with her
and then she told me she was dying of cancer
and I felt bad because I had never experienced sex with some1 who was terminally ill
and thought 'damn, maybe terminally ill ppl are really just DOWN2FUCK like krayzee'
She asked me for a blank check
and I gave it to her, but it didn't matter because I have a trust fund
and she only took $2000 from me
Think that means she 'loved' me because she didn't steal $5K+
Srsly hope she's not sick, though
Would feel 'pretty bad'
and might even consider marrying her
so that she can have my bad ass health insurance [via $15 co-pay]
I miss her
I think I could have changed her
and reconciled all of her debt
and turned her into the free-spirited mom with a meaningful life in the city
that she always wanted.
I would have gotten a matching chest tatty
and we would put the same chest tatty on each of our children
as soon as they exited the womb.
Not sure if this is an 'authentic sad story'
or just some girl who wanted 'to be internet famous'
or possibly 'some sort of hoax' by an AZN graduate art student
If I were this AZN, I would 'turn myself in'
and write a movie script about my meaningful life
and how I was 'just a misunderstood alt from rural Utah/suburbia'
Demand to be played by Karen O/the Juno Girl/Margaret Cho/Sandra Oh/the AZN in Rushmore
She was already in a successful viral video. Think that means u can 'make it' in Hollywood/Bollywood [via Slumdog]. Sort of wish I worked for the Salt Lake City police so I could put my film degree to use by putting together this type of video media. Feel like I would really be helping the world.
I think every1 has 'socially puzzling' people enter their lives' at least once every 2 year. Like the kind who 'steals ur friends laptop' or 'mysteriously enters/leaves town one day.' The kind of person who feels 'really happy' when they are 'social climbing' and u don't rlly 'understand WHY' they seem s0 sad/alone. Fortunately, these types of people are only around for 1-3 months. U just have to be sure not to a) have sex with them b) make them dependent on u for things like 'fun', 'meeting new people', 'transportation services', or 'drugs.' They sort of just 'fade out of ur life' when they realize that u 'don't find them interesting as a person'/they can't 'steal/leech n e thing from u.' U just have to be brave enough not to return their 5th text.
Do u 'feel sad' for the AZN? or does she sound 'too good to be true'?
Do u think she is 'hot'? Do u think she is 'a disgusting person'?
Do u think she will forever change the AZN stereotype?
Do u think she is going to 'go to jail'?
Or will some Alternative Video startup give her a 'show' on their website, like 'Kewl New Bands (with the HIPSTER GRIFTER): Live from the Girl Talk Concert'? Glad that we are guaranteed a 'where are they now...?' post about her in 1.36 years.
Hope she is okay...
Feel sad abt ppl who 'value' stuff that I 'take 4 granted' like social awareness, money, semi-healthy relationships with friends who aren't too krazie, and general social acceptance.
miss u Grifty
(Does n e 1 know what 'grifter' means?)
Please leave ur real/fake story about how u knew her in the comments.
This has a blog post about the popular meme The Hipster Grifter, also known by her human name Kari Ferrell. She is allegedly related to popular standup comedian Will Ferrell.
Comments
Hello,
This is Keri's dad, currently in Utah. Keri is back home with us. She will be turning herself in tomorrow. Please stop with your internet commentary- it is now a family issue. Thank you and please refrain from commenting further as our family will be releasing a statement shortly.
@Keri's Dad, nice first.
"it is now a family issue"
i don't think those words mean what you think they mean.
@Keri's Dad, yeah, nice first!
@Keri's Dad, lolololz srsly?!
@Keri's Dad, I wonder if Kari's dad would spell her name incorrectly.
@Keri's Dad,
holee shit best first in the history of HRO.
@Keri's Dad,
methinks Keri's dad = Keri
@molly, maybs. that would be her greatest grift yet. also, grifty mcgrift.
@Keri's Dad,
Okay first off idiot, it's spelled KARI. Heaven forbid a parent who named his child would known how to spell her name.
It's a fake, troll...what's the IP on this fool?
@Little, <3 ur investigative spirit, horatio 'caine. (wont get grifted 2x)
@Little, lllllllllllllllllllllllloooooooooooooooooolllllllllllz
most authentic dad of the year award goes to keri's 'dad'
she looks 'as big as a rhinosaurus or really large horse' in one photo
alt bewbs.
glad i don't have em, they have a big vein on the left bewb.
@chelseabro, yeh tits have veins in them, get over it.
"The bed was making the sound of the sample in the popular song “Paper Planes” "
best EVAR
@chelseabro, cosign!!!!
hmm... I always thought she was a little 'too into me'
Commemorate the sexy pickup lines of the hipster grifter with your own "toss a hot dog down my hall" shirt or tote.
Coming tomorrow....the "handjob with my mouth" line!
<3
http://www.cafepress.com/atxstylewatch
@Rachel, HRO is not a 'safe space' for commerce, unless u sell pizza, tacos, singles sites, tao lin, or am appy. i m offended. :(
@natalee hologram, did u get "natalee hologram" from the cwyztulz cazals song "trash hologram"?
@MrsOfficer, i mostly listen 2 jimmy jam / buffett.
i can't tell who's kidding
not even that hot :(
@firstazn,
ya srsly
steps to being a hipster grifter:
1 - be a moderately attractive girl or just any ugly AZN (since it doesn't matter to bearded bros in brooklyn apparently)
2 - tell bearded bros at bars you can through hotdogs at them via their vagina hallway / or get handjobs via yo mouf
3 - ask for moneys, steal shit, ect
4 - profit!
can you post asians with smaller faces
@tao, F yes
@tao,
I agree with this post 100%.
where da keut AZNs @
or make a post showing like different sizes of asian faces
seems like asians, out of all the races, have the largest face size variation
just like the front of the face though
not the head size maybe
'though what do i know, i'm not an *?* anthropologist *?*'
@tao, her face looks smaller with haircut
@tao,
apparently AZNs have the largest everything variation. heard the tallest bro and shortest bro are both bros/homies/chums [via the memability clause in their contracts as measurable memes] that live in AZA[sp?]
@blipOFFurRADAR,
"aja," cf. Steely Dan
there's this little azn girl on my campus shuttle with a huuuuuuge face, and she always wears a big white floppy hat that just makes it look huger
i wonder if she knows how to 'grift'
I just wanted to let you know that I enjoy your blog even though I can't fucking stand hipsters (trust fund fueled ironic fashion and coke habit? Oh, I get it.) and think you are a douchebag.
@Fuck, you don't 'get it'. ugh
@▲, the best part of HRO is reading the comments of ppl that don't 'get it'.
@Fuck, i love these embarrassing comments. you are why HRO exists.
@Fuck, the first requirement to being a hipster is hating hipsters. Congratulations.
NEW SPACE FOR ALT BINGO...CAUSE DEAD ASS I KNOW ABOUT THREE GIRLS WHO LOOK LIKE THIS CHICK
y did this have 2 happen?
shes azn
shes korean, my fav kind of azn right now
she has altbewbs with a meaningful tatty on them
its my seoulmate
@louis,
lol @ seoulmate.
pumpkin head
@littlesparrow, Smashing pumpkin
i always google someone immediately after i meet them so i never run into any weird complications like this. her friends don't know how to use the internet
@magical bro, thats why its so important to untag pix u dont look cute in, nvr know who's looking
@magical bro, you ask name and surname to people you hang out with?
@tired, and preferably their primary email address and screen names
this girl is SO ugly
@yo wsup, agreed
@blobblty, me +
lol. remember seeing her @ punk_rock_showz in hi-skool [via sXe scene]. kinda sadd that sXe isn't 'kewl' anymoar...
@SLCalt, sXe was nevar 'kewl'
@authentanick,
agreed. Don't use "anymoar" makes you sound like dirty whore. moar moar g-r-o-s-s-w-h-o-r-e
Carles, are you secretly tryin' to bring back Myspace profiles by pretending it's is something a little more 'racier' than it really is?
'AZN from UTAH' is all you need to hear to know why this bitch would go crazzzzaaay!
LUV U KARI'S DAD!!!!
she's a nice ho I love her
Dear Carles
Fuck you.
I don't know if you think that your blog is funny, relevant, ironic, post-modern, or any other asinine "hipster" buzzword, your blog boils down to the same old racist, misogynistic, hate spewing bullshit that has plagued America since its inception.
i mean, what the fuck, blipsters? yellow fever? this entire post?!?! we're all different, we know. you dont have to sort us into whites and not whites, "bros" and not "bros", heteronormatives and "gheis" or whatever the fuck you say.
our generation has been called the least motivated, and most privileged ever to have existed. We are living in an age where we are connected to each other like no other generation of humanity has been. you can interact with people across the planet NEARLY INSTANTANEOUSLY VIA SATELLITES THAT ORBIT THE FUCKING PLANET, AND ALL YOU HAVE TO CONTRIBUTE IS THE MOST VULGAR, DIVISIVE, AND (MOST DAMNINGLY) POINTLESS DRIBBLE THAT LEAKS OUT OF YOUR ID DOMINATED BRAIN.
you are an embarrassment to our generation, and if history remembers you (which I sure as fuck hope it doesn't) it will be as the death knell of white heterosexual male hegemony.
and I don't give a shit if you think this is Art. If this is the best art you can produce you might want to consider a different career, perhaps in the KKK.
you are only culturally relevant in the sense that you represent the puerile, emotionally stunted, intellectually repressed, and self absorbed America that cares more about listening to hip music and wearing cool clothes that what is happening in the world.
there is nothing wrong with hipsters being fashionable, having educations, or being artistic, as long as they are contributing something useful to our society.
but you carles are slime. you make nothing new, you just recycle old hatred, and draw lines of class and race and sexuality. you are what is wrong with hipsters. and you should be ashamed.
and fuck all of you commenters who encourage this bullshit. YOU SHOULD BE OUTRAGED. I will never buy anything from anyone who pays you to advertise.
@Orion, lol @ id dominated brain
@Orion, thank you! thank you.
@Orion, u mad, bro?
@vivi, I am mad. I'm mad as hell. And you should be too.
this person is speaking for our generation, and he describes us as a pack of superficial and cynical "hip" consumers that care about nothing outside of our shallow culture of Dj's, Parties, Drugs, Hot New Bands, Hot New Trends, and Easily-Digestible-Regurgitated-Memes that keep a healthy ironic distance so that we don't have to actually feel anything about what we are saying and doing.
But that isn't all we are, right? we also have real feelings, right? we have empathy, right? we care about the people around us that are hurting and even the people we can't see, don't we?
more than caring, we realize that world outside of our American youth culture is crumbling.
150,000 farmers have committed suicide in India because of debt since 1997 (its on huffpo now). america is locked in two wars of aggression, and one endless war against a faceless, nationless threat. our national debt amounts to $36,676.46 per citizen, (and no, i'm not some tea bagging douche, that doesn't mean we aren't all radically in debt though) Hundreds of thousands of Americans are losing their homes because of debt.
and now this girl has captured our attention, she lied and cheated her way to a life she couldn't afford, and her world is crashing around her. she's obviously in a lot of trouble. she obviously has mental problems, but she has also hurt a lot of people. this isn't an easy situation and it doesn't call for "ironic" detachment. we could be talking about inequality, this conversation could be about our failure to help americans in debt, or our failure Its not a fucking joke, these are peoples lives.
but what is this discussion? yeah she's hot. no she's a fucking ugly asian, yeah i wanna come on her tits, haha, she can give me a handjob in her mouth.
its pointless, racist, sexist, posturing hype so that carles can sell you all of the things on his sidebar.
please... please don't believe the hype.
@Orion, finally
@Orion, The point is that the culture is sick. The blog brings attention to problems, like race perception, consumerism, self identification via brands, etc. in the hopes PEOPLE LIKE YOU GET MAD ABOUT IT. And do something, or at least change their view point.
Racism can be funny. There is a line here that is hard to walk, and Carles walks it well. Making fun of someone because they are a different race is wrong. Making fun of racism, challenging peoples ideas about race, is healthy.
You probably are well educated and went to a liberal arts college and felt good about the multi-culturalism that was forced on you. Good for you. Angry? Get off the internet and do something.
@Orion, i didn't read a word of that but u need a brewski and a day or two outside ur basement
@Orion, Crlsr is the 'voice of a generation' [via The Altster Ranoffs, the most popular and blogworthy meme in the history of the memesphere]. Ur just jealous that ur 'opinions' /liberal guilt/______ are not read by billions of ppl like Carles's is.
I think OrionBro is someone who's personal brand includes 'being outraged @ stuff'/wearing cargo pants/socks with sandals.
Yall, do you ever worry that when the Newspaper Economy bubble bursts, reading blogs will become mainstream? [the end of HROOOO/alt/blipsterdom/bearded AZNs???]
<3 u CRLSER
H8 u OrionBro
@Orion, Fucking beautiful. This blog is so irononic and sarcastic and biting hahaha LOL! It's just depressing nihilistic bullshit. You overeducated, over-entitled pussies all make me sick. Fucking narcissists and failures.
@Orion,
thanks for your opinion, it was refreshing.
I don't know if Carles is a racist or not. The problem is that his posts avert peoples attention from what is actually meaningful in life, like caring about others, to things that are "entertaining". He is dumbing down our society and numbing it to things that are meaningful. He always presents things in a way that is easier to deal with, but far from realistic. Its easier to view this girl as an object or "meme" than it would be to think about the reality of the situation, which would probably be very troubling. He does this with all sorts of things.
I feel like he's stripping meaning from our society and replacing it with some sort of "false meaning" or search for meaning in all the wrong places.
people are not memes, they are people. Everyone should be taken seriously, even if they go to ridiculous means to get attention. What is hardest for me to deal with about this site is he devaluation of human beings. Every other post turns people into some sort of spectacle to be dissected and picked apart by Carles who is obviously the ultimate critic. These types of posts are having a negative effect on a lot of the readers, given the disturbing responses about whether this girl is a "hot azn" or about how she wants to be fucked.
There has to be better things to blog about, Carles.
@Orion, do you think the hipster grifter was sexist by telling folks to throw a hot dog down her hallway?
@Orion,
I was Kari's friend when she lived in Utah for about 3 years. Despite me being disappointed in her I find this post unusually cruel. Most posts have been very informative and tasteful. This one...is not.
@Orion, tldr
@Orion, hey bro u blog? im rly interested in ur take on important social issues. just kinda wish i knew what 2 do 2 help every1, like indians and farmers, kno wut i mean? mayb if u blog like carles ppl will stand up 4 what's right, and do stuff to help, u kno? ltr bro.
@Orion, cool story bro
@Orion,
Silly me, and all this time I thought this blog was a satire meant to point out the obvious flaws in youth culture so we can laugh about them...
@vonbrachner, uh-huh, silly you.
@vonbrachner, I WAS THINKING THE EXACT SAME THING WEIRD???
@vonbrachner, surprising how well orion "gets it"
CRLS IS RUINING THE EARTH, HE IS DESTROYING OUR SOCIETY AND POISONING R TWEEENS WE TTLY NEED 2 STOP HIM CUZ HES RLLY 'fucking up'
HES LIKE the anti jesus christ of web2.0-3.0
GDDMNIT CRLS U R THE CAUSE OF ALL
THE INjustices IN R WORLD
HAVNT U EVR READ fightclub?
jk
dont really understand why try to start vivarevolutions the comments when they could be doing something to help ppl like raising money
for an important cause like some tweens :
http://clothingwithacause.blogspot.com/
@Orion, bro. you don't get it.
keeping "a healthy ironic distance" numbs it all, fine. but that's what it's about. the best objective analysis is always done from a distance. personal investment in a issue always clouds your judgment with emotionally charged responses, impeding proper rational thought and the triumph of reason.
being ready to get offended at the slightest hiccup doesn't do anything in solving the problem, it adds to it, because it forces away what you may call the "hipsters" of the world. we don't want to feel bad about stuff, as purile and meaningless as you may see that. so when "srs bznz" crops up like this, it's really fucking nice to be able to think about it in this objectified manner, because we all find it leads to examination of the issues at hand in a manner grounded in detached logic. crls is just helping us all get there, and for people who don't get it i can see how it comes across as blatant, crass, lowest-common-denominator, consumeristic tripe. because that's what it is, and that's how we want it.
issues that have moral or ethical charge shouldn't be reserved to the ivory towers filled with the vicariously hyper-offended, steadfastly politically correct youth. i see HRO as allowing a community of motivated people to incorporate humanity into what they would call their "personal brand". as much as bros go on about tugz and kewt azns, there's more to it than that, and if you can't see it, then your liberal education has got you no further than a weird haircut and a pair of birkies. this is the fucking future of activism.
@brobot,
lol @ you. you sound the most mad here doggie. "crls is just helping us all get there". wow. you tool.
@brobot,i like your style... here is to the future robot social scientist!! hyper rationality and atheist utopia!!
@brobot,
do lib arts educated would-be-hippies still wear birkenstocks?
@Orion, amen.
Dear OrionBro:
aaaahahhhahahaha.
U rlly don't 'get it,' do u? Feel like no 1 'gets' real satire n e more bc every1 tries 2 take everything so srsly bc they want to be seen as 'educated/liberal/progressive/______.'
Think this comment sets a new bar for 'entrylvlrs' who 'think Carles posts shit srsly instead of posting what we should all be making fun of.'
It's called critical reading, & u should have learned abt it in ur Ivory Tower college in The City where u learned 2 b so 'uptight.'
Why do you think Carles uses ridiculous grammar, shortens words, makes up his own, and uses phrases like the 'meme economy?' In short, while Carles' posts are meant to be ridiculed (Carles presents them for ridicule and ridicules them himself within the posts), I think it's just as important to ridicule people like you.
people are not memes, they are people
shud be a meme
@Orion,
Simplest way to put it:
Ironic blog. Not a sermon. Crles uses flawed taxonomy to make obvious it's ridiculousness (via acting as perpetrator) ... pretty common way '2 do comedie'.
@chorles, yea but its not funny
@unmutual,
ur argument is 2 good. I... I can't think of decent rebuttal. u win... god damnit u win,
promise 2 retire from reading blogs now.
@Orion,
convinced orion=crls [via endearing 'fuck u' intro 2 The Dissertation Pt.1]
this is THE MOST META carles has gotten s0 far y'all. he's here, in ur comments, MEMING UR MEMES.
no doubt in my blippity blipster mind. you can just call me conspiracy bro [via being an 'undercover bro' named david khari webber chappell]
@blipOFFurRADAR, Yo dawg, I herd you like memes. So I put a meme in your meme so you can meme while you're meme'ing.
@DragonForce,
LOL @ xhibit.
@Orion, are you in some way related to H4X0R bro?
@Orion, what is all this chatter
@Orion,
Good stuff Orion.
I'm with you on this. This racisim 'gimmick' is lame and it's fucking annoying listening to this losers adopting the racsism-as-cool shtick.
I UNDERSTAND IRONY . I UNDERSTAND SATIRE -I DO GET IT.
BUT THIS IS RACISIM. \
CArles... don't care if you are asian yourself. this is hateful stuff. Move on and get back to what you do best; Funny social commentary.
@DwayneWayne, not rlly this is tottaly less racist than that one abt the azns and the economy
racism can be funny
@Orion,
For some reason, I always thought racism was outright believing a race to be inferior, not pretending like races didn't exist and look different
@Orion, Ernz, the new altz
@Orion, i like carles but these comments are pretty gross.
"there’s this little azn girl on my campus shuttle with a huuuuuuge face, and she always wears a big white floppy hat that just makes it look huger"
"make a post showing like different sizes of asian faces"
the worst is probably "pumpkin head
[Reply]
Smashing pumpkin"
do you understand what you are saying? now you're not just making fun of other races but also insinuating violence against an "azn's fat head." how is this different from the prejudice that frat bros or 4chan losers make into memes.
like i said, i do like carles posts and i think he's funny. but i agree with orion in some ways too, in the article she's a person but carles turned her into an "azn." then the readers of this blog don't even realize she's gone from a person to a dumb "altAzn" meme carles made up so they can distance themselves from her actual suffering and talk about the characteristics of people of her race instead of her as a person.
now i feel like i have to end this with something dumb like
//////~but thats just my 2 centz*~\\\\\\\\\ so people will know i'm not a dick and i 'get' hro. this is like.. po po mo. i'm not fifteen so i'm confused about how to end this.
~*~bye yall~*~ whatev.
@Orion, have you ever heard the term "satire"?
@Orion,
you fell for this shit? what the fuck? who cares? if you're so concerned with everything you deride carles for why the fuck are you wasting your time reading this nonsense and writing a response and purile and juvenile as the material you hate.
you're just as bad as carles, if not worse.
get a life and enjoy it, instead of being a wet blanket and pissing all over everything.
@orion,
who the fuck in their right minds searches forums for meaning and depth? have you ever seen a blog before? or do you just go around to all the forums and post your little spiels as a means of entertaining yourself.
do you have any idea what kind of people read this blog. i do. all kinds. and all races.
this isn't the fucking international rape prevention blog. you need to relax.
you know its people like you who kick up a stink every time someone makes a generalization about an Asian or Black person who are really perpetuating racism and hate.
people on this blog may make racist generalizations, they also make them about everybody. these people are treating racism like a joke. its not racism to them, its racism to you.
ps. you suck your own peewee. coz u got ur ribz removed.
I'd do her again...
lolz!
Dont you feel ashamed, carles?
Feel sad, for you carles.
Read your blog cos it was funny.
But this...
Dont even know why you posted this article.
Feel sry after i read this article for karen's family.
@Oreo,
you don't even know how to express yourself without being disingenuous. pathetic.
@Orion, yes youre right. Its so pathetic. Everything is pathetic!
This is not about me. Who cares if i can 'express' myself or not. I think you dont get the point. Whatever.
I have to tell you that im not american or something like that. English is not my mother language.
Au revoir
@Orion, will you just get the fuck over yourself? You're not the only person in America/the world who has solid opinions, and you're not the only person with a stick up their ass either. Clearly you're just another one of those 'angry @ lyf' twats who feel the need to express their views, which btw are just 'so0o0o0 true'. If you're the kind of person who takes everything so seriously, then why the fuck are you wasting your time reading HRO (btw, don't h8 u HRO, you're not a waste of time imo <3). What I'm basically trying to get at; your statements/replies which you've obviously spent an hour structuring so you seem as if you 'definitely know what you are talking about' do not make you sound intelligent. They just make you sound like a pretentious dickhead, and if anything, lower the value of your opinion. You are not king shit.
@suuuuup., cant stand this 'im so intelectual and i know what crls wants to tell us' attitude anymore.
Did you read the original article? I think you dontget it.
Carles is a racist or carles is just sarcastic.
I dont care about this whole thing.
When im saying i feel sorry for the family then i really mean it. And im not that because i feel guilty that i read this hidious blog.
Take it or leave it.
@suuuuup., obvs Orion is sad cause he got fucked over by the Grifter.
I have a beard and a matching azn. Mine's crazy too but she doesn't take my money...I give it to her. Point for me.
bitch is fucking huge and looks like a 40 year old chinese woman.
srsly, wtf.
Sometimes I still <3 U.
i stopped reading about 8 paragraphs in... kinda more interested in the 56 comments about such a 'serious' issue. questions that i were looking for the answers for like, where did she get her tattoo? is her tongue a hand as well? were not answered.
also, LOL @Orion's accidental racism
your website makes me want to kill myself
(current favorite band whoring time)
okay, whoever is getting all pissy about grifterblogging, download this
http://rapidshare.com/files/211306296/__28961___38988___1st_.rar
put on ur ipod or zune, turn the lights out, maybe light a doobie, and hit play, then you will feel better
chris farley post-party pic was way more offensive than this.
@s1mon,
UTAH IS WHERE ITS AT.. BET THE AIDS WEREN'T FROM UTAH...... SORRY BOUT THE AIDS THO.. UTAH IS RELEVENT
this just gets better n better
everything about her is gross. yuxxxxxxxx
OMG RRLLLLLYYYYYY WHO CAN TAKE ANY OF IT SRSLY?!!!!!!!
LOLZ. O_o
hro used to be funnie and keut.
crls whats up with your hatred of AZNs?????????????????????????????????
FUCK U AND YOUR RACIST BLOG. U FAILED. HIPSTERRUNOFF DIED AGES AGO. :) haha.
now that i think about it. i think i side w/ dat busted ass azn grifter. either she's really smart, or anyone who was 'victimized' by her was waaaaaaaay slow.
'the fuck falls for some broad that easy?
and what 'bro' lets themselves get jacked by some bitch??
FAILS.
just feel like azn girls get away with being 'actually ugly'
ne1 else feel like they 'earn points' just for bein 'authentically azn.'
feel like mayb this chick is like actually 30
feelin marginalized bc of my big butt via my jewish mom.
@Leigh, baby, be proud of that butt
LOLZZZZZ AND WHO GIVS SOME BITCH A BLANK CHECK MADE OUT TO THEM?!
don't care how many oral handjobs they gib, wouldn't have given her shit. dudebro should have dangled her off the top of a bridge; try to get monies back.
note 2 self: if i move to the city and go into the grifting industry, i will not get an obnoxious and v. distinctive chest tat
does ne1 know how 2 'break into" grifting? all the grifters i know have a much wider professional network than me.
bloghouse, circa 1988z
MARK IMPERIAL - she ain't nothin' but a hoe (rush street club)
http://www.fileden.com/files/2007/3/20/905521/01%20-%20she%20ain%27t%20n...
@calero, stp wasting our time with your horrid shit.
and do something more productive like fisting yourself
@calero, this link made me glad i went and read this thread
Orion...lolz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111oneoneone
I think the hipstergrifter needs to be brought to Jewsteece by that band "The Polices." Hopefully Zhousteese would continue their mainstream trend via a Police remix with a Sting vocal track...and possibly Hipster Grifter could contribute a verse for the final cut to be released on Ed Rec vol. 4?
Bangers back in 2010 via Hipster Grifter?
Hipster Grifter, bigger than Uffie in 2k__?
Thought alts only stole from corporations... not each other. So sad now.
kari & i were best frendz. we connected so well cuz im a k0rean alt and i couldnt 'identify' with all the h00drat AZNs i grew up around. we ate tofurkey dogs and drank PBR, and wud get rlly 'red in the face'. she bought me tickets for me and her to see the mastercrafts. that show and kari both changed my lyf 4ever, so plz stop all this h8 against kari. she is a gud person.
also:
k0reans cant help but have a pumpkin face. dont h8.
@altphag,
LOL @ 'red in the face' damn ADHase deficiencies...
<3 The Hipster Grifter for making the interwebz fun again.
Personally, the search for the perfect alt breasts has come to a close. We have a winner via Grifty McGriftalt AZN RMX
http://twitter.com/kariferrell
LMAZNAO!!!
@Kari, <3 U grl, I kan has relateability
h8 nothin at the momment
just b glad she didn't tie u up and cut shit off u with wires
[popular AZN horror movie "Audition"]
How can Carles be racist? He's Hispanic!
@Alf In Yo Mouf . com,
Hispanics can't be racist?
on the real tho i'd mayb problee hit it.
CRLS, u should end all ur posts from now on w/"sorry 4 brevity/blunders in spelling; this was blogged from a fuckin iphone" (via autosignature)
@hey anony anony,
Without Wax,
Carles
Pleez duz any1 No the artest HOO did thoze rabbet
paintinz b-hynde the bed. greatful if sew.
@Sledcake,
probz beatrix potter
AZN chicks are disgusting. I hope this bitch goes to prison.
@Trevor,
Carles is attracting legions of your type with this racisit crap.
@Trevor,
you're an ignorant dumbfuck.
@Trevor,
Agreed- hpofully they have standardized tests in jail...azns...
I think she's at the new school. apparently they have herds of criminals there!
ewz not at all hot. azn's w/ tats are fuckable for fucking sake.
Fun story...thanks...
This is all reluctantly funny and what not, but you are a horrible writer.
Sounds like a typical SLCalt. They are all fucking balls crazy
I regard HRO more as a social experiment rather than something "serious".
I believe Carles is more of an extreme example of my generation, and that makes me reflect upon some issues such as how we relate to music, celebrities, our deep desire for "uniqueness", etc.
tl;dr
Theory of Knowledge has shifted my paradigms. Whoo IB etc, don't overreact; chill pill on everyone
doezn't brooklyn hav meth yet?
plz get used to lot of this,
<3 SF in the 90z
as an AZN gurl, i dont find this racist. this "grifter" fucked over many people, constantly lied, and was probably never remorseful for any harm she has caused. she thought she was super alt [via veganism + getting 'tatted' + ____ ] & carles is just poking fun @ this dumb bitch.
carles,
if you are in fact AZN (hopefully k0rean), u + me = <3 4evr plz?
yeh sometimes crls crosses the line a bit with the azn jokes.
A very real story about the Grifster from my friend Chris, who sort of went on a date with her during which he watched online voyeur sites with her and she tried to bilk money from him. Also it involves a pirate ad on craigslist and pimples:
http://invertedsoapbox.com/2009/04/17/voyeurism-rent-money-and-kissing-a...
Orion is right in his analysis, and his facts are solid. The function of media, including HRO, is not entertainment but adjustment of the flow of capital, delivering advertisers consumers. HRO does not make its readers "aware," "informed," or even fundamentally reconsider notions of consumerism (which is the biggest thing it "criticizes," right?) [It has however encouraged me to use many more quotation marks]
Regardless of the inherent function of commercial media, there is a message delivered independently (sorry, McLuhan). I will say that it is unlikely that Carles holds particularly racist views- but rather categorically does. Even assuming the criticism and "social commentary" that is present here is agitational (and not in larger part for "entertainment'), it is focused on petty issues of amerikan class structures, without indicting the political economy at the root of these problems domestically and abroad. As Orion noted,
"this isn’t an easy situation and it doesn’t call for “ironic” detachment. we could be talking about inequality, this conversation could be about our failure to help americans in debt, or our failure Its not a fucking joke, these are peoples lives.
but what is this discussion? yeah she’s hot. no she’s a fucking ugly asian, yeah i wanna come on her tits, haha, she can give me a handjob in her mouth.
its pointless, racist, sexist, posturing hype so that carles can sell you all of the things on his sidebar."
The result of Carles agitational approach (I am still being this generous, that it is not as absolutely reactionary as it could possibly be) is the racist, chauvinist discourse that reflects the attitude that justifies conditions the US imposes on the third world and its own second class citizens.
Orion is right to be critical, but is ultimately caught in consternation without a broader perspective and certain analytical tools. Their frustration in defense of young, hip consumers is troubling because it attempts to reconcile bourgeois decadence with activism and class struggle- there is, in fact a problem with consuming for its own sake if the oppressive class is an enemy.
"please don't buy the hype"?
Please read a god damn book, a whole one, you lazy fucking parasites.
Allow me to log off the internet that 85% of the world will never interact with, by closing my laptop that I would never be able to afford without the benefit of rampant superprofiteering imperialism on the behalf of me and my fellow red white and blue blooded amerikans.
@poststructuralistbro, shes a fucking ugly azn
@poststructuralistbro,
Media Studies Bro?
@poststructuralistbro,
"The result of Carles agitational approach is the racist, chauvinist discourse that reflects the attitude that justifies conditions the US imposes on the third world and its own second class citizens."
That's the point, no? Carles' "blog-voice" is simply an over exaggerated "mega-alt"; saying what many of us would assume someone must be thinking while doing "alt" things, thereby making his writing a commentary on the very things that you say he "promotes". The post is not racist, it makes fun of the absurdity of racism. It is not sexist, it makes a mockery of sexism.
Also this woman deserves all the hate directed at her, she did horribly dishonest things. Her actions warrant the view of her as "sub-human" because a decent human being would not do the things she did.
@sFurrt,
I believe you misquoted me, I don't think I ever mentioned Carles "promot[ing]" anything, or anything about "sub-human."
Regardless,
The point of the passage you quoted me on is not that the result of his approach is racism or chauvinism in his writing, but in the following replies, comments etc. I was giving him the credit whether deserved or not, that he is 100% genuinely satirical, (ironically) without the irony of the culture he lampoons. I was only agreeing with Orion in part- I do not think that Carles message is lost on his readers, they get the joke. Empirically though, his readership is racist and chauvinist, as well as classist, first worldist, and pathetically consumerist. Again, this is because categorically they are part of the global ruling class, and even among that, wealthy and decadently so. They do not support in any material way, the abolition of racism, chauvinism or any other issue of class struggle.
However, this is just as I said that Carles views (in my analysis) are not particularly racist etc, but are categorically so. The commenters on "cumming on her tits" et al may not even be chauvinists in particular- the comments are probably for "ironic" effect- but they (the commenters) do undoubtedly support tyranny over women globally in their lives.
Additionally,
"Also this woman deserves all the hate directed at her, she did horribly dishonest things. Her actions warrant the view of her as “sub-human” because a decent human being would not do the things she did."
I did not at all touch on that, but my analysis is sociological more than any other approach and there is not much for me to say about personal choice. People are not independent of their material conditions, and hers were such that this happened. I will not claim sympathy for her, though nor will I claim much sympathy for the people she swindled. I do, however, think that there is more to deal with here than "hat[ing]" her and using her as a tabloid morality play. Sexually charged stories get passionate responses and this is not an exception. We need to go back and think for a moment about what exactly we want to take away from such a public tangle of cultural issues.
@poststructuralistbro,
the problem is in assuming that everyone who has a soapbox must use it to make the world a better place [via the ideology of the assumer] . this blog is just what it calls itself: hipster runoff, the detritus of a subculture; what ends up here is by definition the bad or at least silly side of a certain section of society. its true that many commenters do in fact embody some shitty attitudes, and hide them behind the veneer of "do i or dont i mean it" irony that embodies contemporary discourse. its def annoying to read. on the other hand, expecting this fucking garbage pail of a blog to be the site of serious intellectual ferment to move us past the attitudes that fuel carles' very existence is clownshoes.
@poststructuralistbro, media studies first year.
now, i think this is all a really interesting discussion... i mean, i've always taken the view that Carles wasnt racist, and that when he says something like "wonder what job i'd have if i were poor/uneducated/a minority" this is sort've trying to to point out the unfortunate fact that it is harder for members of minorities (presumably mostly racial) to get well paid jobs in america. however, i also take the view that this is JUST A BLOG... and whilst this doesnt invalidate any discussion about what is being said... i think it's the case that HRO is probably neither making a positive or negative influence on anything in the actual world.
i read it a lot, find it very entertaining, but it hasnt changed my opinion on anything at all one bit. the people who made the racist comments were probably already shitheads before they read this post.
and i've also always assumed that this blog was roughly 80% a joke. and that what it was satirising wasnt other races or modern apathy, but a certain kind of niche internet culture, of which we're all a part on here, which is in fact both stupid and funny.
i really care about people/the world... but chill guyz
@VoiceOfReason?, Finally! A post worth reading! /o/
tl;dr
i met her a couple of years ago... she was a barmaid at a place i worked. she told me she was also a part time non sexual masseuse. i sort of recoiled at that but did my best not to offend. i don't quite know how it happened but that night i found myself at her appartment, she was pretty straight forward with wanting to have sex with me but the thing i guess i'm one of those meaningful bros, sleeping with a girl i don't find particularly attractive gets to be bad for me really fast so i don't do that . so when she finally got out of the shower, next thing i know, also don't quite know how it happened but we found ourselves at my appartment. she had to do a homework and did not have a computer... next thing i know i am showing her the ropes to the wonderful world of laptop djing/ she asked me to hax her ex bf's voicemail / she tries to sing-me up for a sweet telephone plan/ a playlist we worked on mysteriously disappeared/ and that's pretty much it, she left at that point i guess. my appartment is full of "interesting stuff" sort of like in the opening of that ray bradburry tv show and i don't keep a tight inventory ... would not be surprised if she took a pocketfull of that funky junk
Dear H8r,
Place the blame upon musicians, artists, and culutured youth. That will DEFINITELY solve all of the world's problems.
You complain about Carles nicknaming azns and blips, but take a gander in the ol' looking glass. You are doing the exact same thing. I just seems "acceptable" when white people are subjected to taunting, doesn't it?
Point is... you are an ass hole. WE KNOW the world is fucked. Failure and mishandling don't cling to a certain skin color, rather, these vile particles can flow through anyone's veins.
"racism is funny sometimes"
Go fucking get your membership card stamped at the KKK Ranch, assholes.
@poutineybopper69,
a billion dollars says you're white, and therefore have an opinion of racism based not on things that have happened to you but on what you wish people to perceive you as being.
I'll bet you try to say "...well my black friend..." a lot don't you? Racism itself is not funny. Things like this which mock racism are not only funny, but do more than just saying "eff racism" to stop it. The "racism" on this site shows how absolutely stupid racism is.
h8 u "not racist"Bro
@sFurrt, "[Showing] how absolutely stupid racism is" is NOT racism. Therefore, “racism is funny sometimes” is still a stupid comment. Unless you just think racism is funny, sometimes.
so many spoons. how dare you make this about race.
finally, a truly relevant post...
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=180348038217#ht_722wt_77
ewww! Who the fuck does she think she is...this is one funny ass story and she's gross looking. But I shouldnt be mean. I didnt know azn's can be so desperate.
@Mia, I saw mia b4 and she is gross - i mean like really gross
oops sorry. I just read her dad's reply. =x
Cool story bro!
She just added me to Facebook. WHAT DO I DO NOW?!
CARLES, UR MY ONLY HOPE NOW
FUCKYALL
it may please you all to know that kari actually means "cock" or "the cock" in a foreign language that i speak.
She could be an instantly successful pornstar. People dig this shit.
If he was you'd think he'd know her name is Kari (going by the arrest warrant)
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