via wtfdyhak
I want to be a teen again
and make love
to a girl in my Speech class
accidentally ‘get her pregnant.’
Her belly will swell with life
that came from my teenage semen
too late to pull up
but experiencing xtreme pleasure
She will eventually have to go to a high school for pregnant teens
and make friend with other people who are in her situation
we will say that ‘this was a gift from God’
and name our child something Biblical
Before the baby comes out of her vagina,
we shall use my digital camera to film a few videos
that people can relate 2
and they can know that ‘we are human’
even though we did something unconventional
by having a babie so earlie.
We have a story to share
We can still laugh
We can still dance like no1 is watching
We can birth like we’ve never been hurt.
This is what it means to be young and beautiful.
It is a state of mind.
We will become youtube famous and get 100,000 subscribers
and make ‘mad ad revenue’ by ‘going viral’
My water breaks
rush to the hospital with my 19 year old boyfriend
and my mom
holding my hand as the baby pops out
She looks at me, pretty ashamed
She looks at my boyfriend, pretty resentful
Worried about the financial burden
that she didn’t really ’sign up for’
There is no such thing as a mistake.
We are all gifts from God.
I read in a book that babies come out ‘intelligent’
if they listen 2 music while in the womb.
not sure if u can still ‘partie’
when ur preggos
Loading ...
IAmCarles.com
43 Comments
first! babies smell bad
Reply
//////////Reply by HOMOSAPIEN_FUCK
//////////Posted May 9th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
@lawwrence, Bitch got Twinz
Reply
can’t dancing during pregnancy cause retarded babies? or is that just caused by having retarded teen parents?
Reply
//////////Reply by panchizzy
//////////Posted May 9th, 2009 at 6:04 pm
@plasticimpossible, iceburn!
Reply
what happens to babies that listen to fergie in the womb???
Reply
//////////Reply by rumtag
//////////Posted May 8th, 2009 at 6:09 pm
i’m legit concerned, yall.
Reply
//////////Reply by perezhilton
//////////Posted May 8th, 2009 at 8:22 pm
@rumtag, child abuse
Reply
//////////Reply by Ammonia
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 5:03 pm
@rumtag, Fergie Syndrome
Reply
I’ll re-up the blond one. ‘Get her a punch-card at the hospital.
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 3:51 am
@uglygirlzarntpeople, oh god
Reply
onlE ting worse dan preggos, is t33n preggos.
thnx Juno. h8 u.
Reply
that’s sad…and there are creepsters getting off on these tween preggos.
Reply
//////////Reply by LVL5INFERNO
//////////Posted May 8th, 2009 at 6:20 pm
@fattienskinniegenes,
That sexy blonde deff gave me a chub
Reply
//////////Reply by born & bread
//////////Posted May 8th, 2009 at 9:31 pm
i got chubs 4 u
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 3:52 am
@born & bread, is i’m chub for you the new ghey for you?
i froze my eggs for you. so now we can have babies whenever ‘we’re ready’
Reply
this is totally fucked
Reply
//////////Reply by aw, fukk
//////////Posted May 8th, 2009 at 11:07 pm
@aaron,
just like those chiks
right b4 they were given parasites from god
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 3:55 am
@aw, fukk, I’ve never heard it put so eloquently. My mother asked me tonight if she thought my BROTHER would ever have kids. it’s not like I told her I wasn’t having kids so it was kind of meta.
Reply
Alien Baby.
Reply
lookin good america.
Reply
http://whythefuckdoyouhaveakid.com/
Reply
//////////Reply by tweeen
//////////Posted May 8th, 2009 at 7:02 pm
@wtfuhvbb,
LOLOCAUST
Reply
//////////Reply by lolz
//////////Posted May 9th, 2009 at 12:27 am
@wtfuhvbb, oh man. so good so good so good
Reply
//////////Reply by Princess Jazzy Gems
//////////Posted May 9th, 2009 at 2:56 am
@wtfuhvbb,
That is the most interesting website ..ever.
I don’t know how to react.
thanks for the link!
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:01 am
@Princess Jazzy Gems, It’s not so interesting as it is addictive…..kind of like heroin.
Reply
Dsgrace whn tw33ns get bbies, it turns out shitty anyway
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:06 am
@kewlt, I don’t know…I mean if your going to have a kid I guess you can get it over early in your life….and you can live more vicariously through them via being closer to their own age…. Because in a way it always turns out shitty….and doesn’t really make parents as happy as they think they are. But then I guess you don’t have to die alone unless you REALLY fuck them up big time. Some from column A and some from column B.
Reply
that was fucking disgusting.
Reply
//////////Reply by m
//////////Posted May 9th, 2009 at 11:06 am
@chelseabro, agreed.
Reply
babie= authentic accessory as of 2k36 (via sterile epidemica post WW7)
h8 u Iran
Reply
what music is best for babbies
my babby will listen to the animal collectives in the womb
Reply
//////////Reply by aw, fukk
//////////Posted May 8th, 2009 at 11:10 pm
@perezhilton,
anco is mnstrm now that they were on the late show
guess ur babi will be fucking retarded and not care about fashion or liberal arts degrees
they wont care if u buy them a fixed gear tricycle
feel sorry 4 u and ur future mnstrmr baby.
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:09 am
@aw, fukk, none of my favorite bands have ever played on network TV and they NEVER will…nor will they ever license their music to some greedy ‘business’….and this will make me more authentic than my peers.
Reply
Feeling sorry for the unborn babies… =’(
Reply
why go back in time when you can have some delicious cake now
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:10 am
@bro, Is there any other kind?
/fatty?
Reply
Preggers chicks are s00000 disgusting yall.
Reply
//////////Reply by adelaide
//////////Posted May 9th, 2009 at 3:29 am
@Semblance,
how insnstive
we were all once bbie inside pregger tw33n
s0000 precios, yall
Reply
let’s see sum pix of the d-bag boyfriends, and laugh xD
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:11 am
@forumbro, If I had a gold star I’d give it to you.
Reply
fake tummies, emerging trend?
Reply
Thoroughly enjoyed your poem. Laughed out loud.
Reply
Is blondie having sextuplets? She looks disproportionate.
Hope da babiez don’t have shaken syndrome coming out.
Reply
yo i love this song!
Reply
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5kPiMvib5mo
Reply
//////////Reply by chong
//////////Posted May 9th, 2009 at 10:44 am
@Boobo, lulz baby water evrywhere
Reply
//////////Reply by Ammonia
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 5:05 pm
@Boobo, lulz
Reply
That didn’t just happen..
Reply
Those teens are soo trashy. Practice girls, one might say.
-www.circalamusica.com
Reply
i just heard steve aoki for the first time, and now my entire itunes feels ‘irrelevant’…
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:12 am
@sarah, I’m not sure if that says more about you or steve aoki.
Reply
how did they both get pregnant at the same time? i think the one with dark hair might just be fat
Reply
//////////Reply by Kenny G
//////////Posted May 9th, 2009 at 5:03 pm
@denny, prollz by the same bro. ew. who fed them chillis first. yum.
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:14 am
@Kenny G, do I go with a comment about being too cheap or too expensive…could go either way.
Reply
It would be too awkward to have ur water break at a party… or even more awkward if you party so hard u have an involuntary abortion…
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:14 am
@Lord Kalvin, without knowing your pregers.
Reply
wow..DA DA DA fer sher.
ross
Reply
Robert Frost was a hack. This is classic….
Reply
Why the fuck does every body comment as if they are carles. Ya’ll? Does it make you feel ‘hip? Like you have some thing ‘legitimate’ to contribute?
Reply
//////////Reply by E
//////////Posted May 9th, 2009 at 9:10 pm
@sally, ugh h8 u mnstrmr
Reply
//////////Reply by Semblance
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 3:05 am
@sally,
Entry level fggt right here, yall.
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:16 am
@sally, I don’t try to but I don’t not try to. It’s actually spilling into my non-HRO writing….we’re all just a product of our environment.
Reply
yo I don’t even comment on this site… but thats some fucked up shit.
Reply
what the fuck carles
it’s been 2 days
where’s ‘the funny’?
Reply
carles,
you didn’t update at all for saturday. make a new one in the next four hours or I might ‘fucking off myself’.
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:18 am
@fortune, I wasn’t even on the interwebs on Saturday. What’s the most alt way to refer to the internet ironically? interwebs, internets, intertubes?
Reply
scared yall
maybe crls ‘offed himself’
i dont know what id do if crls was ded
theres nothing else like hro guyz
plz come back crls/jeffbro/hacksterfightclubbro
Reply
hey yall, add me/read me/ SOMETHING
Reply
Crls, you better blog your ass off these next few days. A whole 24 hours and not one post? Not even a shitty ‘guess that celebrity look-alike’ post? Are you fucking kidding me? Do your fucking job Crls, srsly. Tired of this shit.
Reply
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 4:21 am
@Narclobster, It’s not like he can’t just steal from commenters…..probably had a macbook problem or worse; no wifi.
Reply
I was kind of expecting a post on swine flu masks and how they are going to go really alt before they go mainstream. Supposedly you can’t get them right now so they should have mad cred since you either “know a guy” or you were just so far ahead of the masses.
Reply
//////////Reply by uglygirlzarntpeople
//////////Posted May 10th, 2009 at 1:23 pm
@anony, I’m still wearing my old SARS mask; it’s all Sharpied over with Warped Tour band names and smells kinda Garlicky; I made it my own.
Reply
mother’s day pre-party
Reply
http://www.whythefuckdoyouhaveakid.com
Reply
Hopefully, that unborn baby will one day be able to cash in on its mother’s internet fame.
Reply
WTF!!!!!!!, her belly is pretty enormous, Is she going to have 8 babies or what??? o.O
Reply