Photo via lookbook
Sometimes ur hornie, but there’s no1 else around 2 ‘get u off.’ I feel happie that some1 invented ‘masturbation.’ Imagine if there was no way 2 pleasure urself? Feel like there would be a lot of lonely people out there. I think guys just have to ‘tug off’ and ‘watch some slut getting fucked’ on the internet.
Does n e 1 know how girls ‘get off’?
From what I have heard, when a girl wants 2 cum by herself, she just has to sit on top of a washing machine/dryer?
Not even really sure how vaginas work. I think there is 1 part that ur ’supposed 2 rub’ and then another part ‘deep inside.’
Feel anxious about losing my virginity. Worried that my parents will find out and think that I’m ‘a slut’/'hornie piece of shit’. I just wish that they’d realize that I’m young and in love.
Happie that I know about ‘condoms’ and ‘alternate methods of contraception.’ I srsly feel like my life would be over if I got a girl preggers.
Sort of wish my middle school had Sex Ed/taught evolution. Think that I wouldn’t be so ‘naive’ if I knew more about the world.
Is n e 1 gonna wait 2 have sex until ur married?
What do u do when ur hornie? Do yall like sexting?
This is a post about exploring ur sexualitie, kinda like the movie EYES WIDE SHUT.
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IAmCarles.com
27 Comments
LOsing yr virginity is the most importnat experiance in yr life that u will ever have. if u fuck it up u will be messed up 4 life.
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//////////Reply by *_*
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 2:21 pm
@yo, vibrator counts?
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//////////Reply by yo
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 2:25 pm
@*_*, only if u fall in luv with it n call it like a million times afterward. then call it an asshole cause it doesnt want a relationship.
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//////////Reply by anon
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 3:58 pm
@yo, first
//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 9:41 pm
@yo, lols
//////////Reply by Gldfsh
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 7:49 pm
@yo,
that explains a lot
thx
<3 u
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Second!
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cumming iz so mnstrm.
i prefers thee hot carl.
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//////////Reply by troyish
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 5:15 pm
@lusciouslou, LOL
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//////////Reply by corydan
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 8:03 pm
@lusciouslou,
i like hot carl’s jr.
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Carles stop going on lookbook u stupid fggt. There’s no alt tits on there or anything . Just a bunch of teenagers that got to the hipster party late/ are trapped in suburbia.
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//////////Reply by oh yeah
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 2:43 pm
obey this cmmtr carles it is 4 the best
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//////////Reply by ross
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 2:56 pm
@oh yeah,
“got to the hipster party late” that is so silly…..
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 9:43 pm
@ross, totally…. everyone knows your supposed to get to the hipster party before you have pubes.
//////////Reply by lawlcatz
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 6:12 pm
@yo, AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You hate them, too, Carles.
fggts
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Think praying b4 sex is an effective method of contraception. U can ‘trust’ Jesus 2 not ‘fuck up ur life 4ever.’
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//////////Reply by Princess Jazzy Gems
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 6:01 pm
@brobro, funny/tru-fax.
***unless ur ghey. then jesus will give you the HIVs
rite?
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//////////Reply by Clausewitz
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 11:24 pm
@Princess Jazzy Gems, yeah, but that’s only 2 make up 4 the fact queerz can’t get each other preggers. ‘we r all connected.’
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that giant vagina is kinda nasty. does that mean im gay
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//////////Reply by born & bread
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 3:00 pm
@fredMS, yepeper
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//////////Reply by fredMS
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 3:26 pm
@born & bread, does that make me alt
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//////////Reply by brobro
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 4:57 pm
@fredMS, it would __ yrs ago, but now ghey is mnstrm.
//////////Reply by fredMS
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 6:27 pm
@born & bread, jus wanna be mizundastood (via pink)
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//////////Reply by perrigrine
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 7:02 pm
@fredMS, no, it means that is the nastiest vagina in the world. if mine looked like that, i’d kill myself
//////////Reply by Gldfsh
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 7:51 pm
@fredMS,
i thought it looked ok except for the straight thin hairs around the edge
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 9:45 pm
@fredMS, Is there a good looking one? There’s not exactly a lot of good looking dicks either…. just saying.
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//////////Reply by klsdjf
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 9:52 pm
@anony, so tru no such thing as a good looking dick
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your intrested in how girls do it.. I cum just fantasising bout random hot situations. Dont need porn, though sometimes im really up for it. But they all suck, according to me. Tell me one good porno that doesnt have a twisted look on women.
I can´t cum with boy, only by myself. I think its like that for many, we are so caught up thinking about “being sexy” and bout how great the sex is supposed to be, that we forget to reaaaallllllly enjoy it.
how old r u carles? if your in the 30’s and still living with your parents, still a virgin. u better jump of a cliff or buy the latest mnstrm cd and throw up @ urself.
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//////////Reply by dreamsgrass
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 3:08 pm
@lolo, carles is in his 20s
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//////////Reply by REMBARDNT FON RIGHN
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 3:13 pm
@dreamsgrass, no hes a tween in midl school like us all
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//////////Reply by kid
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 3:46 pm
@lolo, being a girl really sucks. Its so hard to get an orgasm from someone else. Plus you have to worry about getting pregnant all the time. Makes me wonder why i have sex. so pointless and unsatisfying.
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//////////Reply by lolo
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 3:59 pm
@kid, i agree. i dont wana eat all them pills, makes me sick. I think its really boys responsibility to wear condom. but hey, i like to fuck. or maybe i just like the feeling of being loved, kissed, held. maybe thats what i like… not the actual sex.
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 9:49 pm
@lolo, Guys should of course have condoms but it never hurts to have a backup plan…all it takes it one. Or just stick to hand jobs “with your mouth”.
//////////Reply by Loot the core hound
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
@kid, get a new boy .. I haven’t even shared sex with a gurl and i already know your worth it. Cuz I totaly am!
Only the rarest of boys (me) can give a gall a good time.. It’s what makes being a altboy! Vs bro such a Apealing bff(fukr) guy thin yer
Ps I like girls ….enough
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//////////Reply by lameshit,HRO.
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 5:34 pm
@Loot the core hound,
lol wut?..
//////////Reply by hardtug
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 5:53 pm
@lameshit,HRO
2nd that
//////////Reply by Gldfsh
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 7:53 pm
@Loot the core hound,
‘its what makes me an altboy’
h8 u
//////////Reply by kid
//////////Posted May 6th, 2009 at 11:27 am
@Loot the core hound,
yeah. that was all kind of confusing.
//////////Reply by Clausewitz
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 11:26 pm
@kid, mayB you should just ask d00dz 2 halp u masturbate?? most of them would b up to that if some tugjobs were involved.
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//////////Reply by loosegoose
//////////Posted May 6th, 2009 at 7:37 am
@kid, just get a guy to eat you out, no risk of getting preggers and youll defskies cum. also the pill rocks, i only get my period 4 times a year and i can choose when they happen. luvs it
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//////////Reply by Rabb
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 9:19 pm
@lolo, I am now liek totally grateful that I can like cum by like thinking about it even if i’m like totally out of it,
Btw I masturbated with a tube of lipgloss once.
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//////////Reply by lolo
//////////Posted May 6th, 2009 at 8:38 am
@Rabb, me 2
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//////////Reply by Rabb
//////////Posted May 7th, 2009 at 7:16 pm
@lolo,
The lipgloss thing or ??
Some gurls are virgins by circumstance, not by choice.
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//////////Reply by Clausewitz
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 11:26 pm
@Anoniemous, [via environmental determinism via being fugly]
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//////////Reply by riiiiot
//////////Posted May 6th, 2009 at 5:43 am
@Clausewitz, LOL @ fugly grlz
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‘Looking for love’ again Carles?
I ‘get off’ on Dim Mak ‘pornos’
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2009/04/do-the-offices-of-the-popular-alt-record-label-dim-mak-also-serve-as-a-porn-studio.html#comments
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boys like 2 ‘cum’ with gurls, right? do you think they would give me money for the opportunity to ‘cum’?
has anyone ever considered doing that for a living instead of retail/construction/dealing ecstasy?
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that dim mak porno turned me on so much it got me really wet then i rubbed my pee pee (clit) while lying down on the floor
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I thourt not being sexualy active/acepted was what being alt was all about . Why els would you want so much attention via fatherfigures/growing out of touch mummmsys
Geez you guys actualy do all tthis strange shit for the love of it.??!!!!!1!
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 9:53 pm
@Loot the core hound, It’s because we hate ourselves and think it makes the world better to hate/love everyone else.
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CARLES I WANT U TO SHOVE UR ENTIRE FIST INTO MY VAG; WRIST DEEP
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//////////Reply by gaycore
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 4:50 pm
@ROB, ew
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CRLS u need 2 find an alt broad who likes it in the butte. its pretty much the most alt sex u can get + u can’t get her preggers
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//////////Reply by Cobra
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 5:38 pm
@Bloghaus,
you can give her an stDEE
you cunt
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//////////Reply by Bloghaus
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 6:04 pm
@Cobra,
psure crls won’t be giving her an std if he’s a virgin
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I want to have sex with only one girl, is this possible, help gaisss/ carly
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//////////Reply by fact alert
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 5:56 pm
@Cobra, she already fucked a bunch of other bros and they cummed on her
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//////////Reply by Cobra
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 6:37 pm
@fact alert, Doesn’t mean I cant still have sex with one girl. I’ll be doing the cumming from now on.
thnx for advice
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//////////Reply by Clausewitz
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 11:29 pm
@Cobra, evr heard abt marriage? think that str8 ppl are allowed 2 do it but only fggts ‘think its cool’ n e moar. if u marry her and she fucks another d00d, you can publicly humiliate+bankrupt her [via good lawyer]. think that might help.
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all these comments r so faggot. ppl talking about ‘love’ & ‘kissing’, that shit is 4 the gays
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//////////Reply by klsdjf
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 6:29 pm
@michael cera, ur movies suck
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//////////Reply by Cobra
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 6:36 pm
@michael cera, Lol that means I’m gay. Faggot.
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//////////Reply by anony
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 9:57 pm
@michael cera, Yeah I expected a little more “meta” but you know it’s world where the boys are girls and the girls are boys….somehow it all works.
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//////////Reply by brobro
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 11:45 pm
@michael cera, plz make arrested development movies, need more bro/alt comedy in my lyfe
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a long flight of stairs also acts as a good method of contraception, it’s my Plan C
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does tugjobs count as losing ones virginity?
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//////////Reply by adelaide
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 7:51 pm
@yo,
dependz who’s doin the tuggin
and with what bodypart (via mouth tug)
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Used 2 have an alternative gf 2 ‘make sex with’, but I always felt t0tes guilty and sad afterwards [via Jesus].
Ever since I ’shed my mainstreamer parents ideals’/became a part of something bigger than myself, I’ve rlly wanted 2 move 2 the city so I can ‘fuck a bunch of chicks’. Or maybe just find a zany altbroad who ‘goes 2 art school’ and is a ‘free thinker’ with whom I can ‘develop a committed relaishy’ and she can ‘give me handjobs with her mouf’ [via redundant Hipstie Griftie-themed jokes].
Is it mainstream 2 use condoms? I watched ‘an adult motion picture’ once where seven mainstreamer/maltstreamer bros with tribal tattoos banged a keut skank in the vagina/rectum/mouf and they were all using condoms. Is it the kind of thing where u just have 2 give in and ‘be a lil bit mainstream’ 2 be safe? Or is there an alternative answer? Is it alt 2 have gonorrhea/chlamydia/AIDS like Carleser Bukowski/Ernie Hemingway/the Robert Dylans? Is it alt 2 get a girl’s eggo preggo [via Juno]?
s0 confused
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//////////Reply by Clausewitz
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 11:31 pm
@bwllmb, condoms r cool b/c they were basically only ever used by gay men 10-15 years ago [via AIDS]. kinda ironic if ur banging a girl.
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i’m 19 and still a virgin because i haven’t found the right girl to share that moment with yet.
now that may be considered “odd” by some people, but i’ve never been interested in fucking everything that moves like i’m trying on every pair of shoes in the fucking shoe store.
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//////////Reply by quakelive
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 10:40 pm
@Jewel,
Dude. You’re a virgin because you’re scared. Grow a ‘pair.’ (Did i do that right?)
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//////////Reply by Jewel
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 11:08 pm
@quakelive, yeah, scared of it meaning nothing. My “pair is fully grown” bro.
didn’t know having standards is the new gay.
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//////////Reply by Clausewitz
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 11:21 pm
@Jewel, kinda like u. i think in this age of casual sex, ‘w8ing’ can be really chill, kinda like a cleanse, but 4 ur peen instead of ur tummie. now that ppl’s parent’s don’t ‘beat them’ if they sexxx up the neighborhood, only the really chill intro-spiritual bros r ‘virgins.’
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//////////Reply by bwllmb
//////////Posted May 6th, 2009 at 3:25 am
@Clausewitz,
Think I understand. Now that ‘banging keut skanks’ is mainstream, the authentic, meaningful thing 2 do is ‘not banging keut skanks’. Right?
Just wish we could all live in a society free of social norms. Just want 2 live in a log cabin up in the Cascade Mtns. Where we could ‘fuck like animals’ and ‘cum on the perfect pair of alt breasts’ and not care about ‘what other ppl think’.
Should I grow a beard?
‘I don’t mean 2 seem like I care about
material things like a social status
I just want 4 walls and adobe slabs 4 my girls!’
-PandaBro & The Animal Collectors
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//////////Reply by brobro
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 11:50 pm
@Jewel, ghey
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//////////Reply by Jewel
//////////Posted May 5th, 2009 at 11:57 pm
@brobro, do you always label things you’re not capable of understanding as gay?
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necrophelia is the REAL ALT way!
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//////////Reply by AA
//////////Posted May 6th, 2009 at 2:54 am
@Ja3on, alt zombies (via prgnnt corpse)
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kinda waiting to cum home 1 nijht and find a gurl goin thru my ______ and fuck her as punishment whilst wearing my dim mak shirt.
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//////////Reply by generik witty cmmnt
//////////Posted May 6th, 2009 at 2:17 am
@Balto,
lollerz
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Ha ha ha 1- Girls usually masturbate by rubbing their “clitoris” or fingering themselves, not on washing machines. Sometimes showerheads, virbrators, or dildos are used (some girls even use other general objects….gross). 2- Yeah we get hony and masturbate. Every girl is different. Some like porn, some like fantasies in thier head, images, or just whatever gets them “in the mood”, so yeah some girls like “sexting” , cybering, or phone sex.
3- And contrary to popular belief, I know lots of people who plan to wait. Truth be told, the most successful couples I know waited until marriage.
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h8 this lookbook cunt b/c she so desperately wants 2b white [via dyed blonde hair] when she’s so obv. a grifting AZN. also h8 her small laundry machine cause it looks like it could only fit [2 am appy vnecks 1 bra] in there.
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//////////Reply by lady gaga
//////////Posted May 6th, 2009 at 2:02 pm
@riiiiot, samesies. she needs 2 go 2 buzznet for that shit.
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saving myself before marriage because my sister got preggers and i dont wanna risk doing the same. =(
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d00d just diddle in the middle
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u just gotta have a firm understanding of:
http://i41.tinypic.com/2uj2pmp.jpg
just diddle the gyner, whichever gyner
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