This is a metaphor abt growing older / ur innerchild being dead.
Photo by the cobrasnake
I remember when I was a kid, I watched a lot of TV. Not sure if they internet 'really existed' back then, possibly 'just AOL.' I had always thought that my childhood was special. I thought that me + my brother/sister had a more meaningful childhood than any1 else in the world. However, as I grew older, I found out that the people who lived around me generally had the same experience as me (they possibly had more lenient parents).
Back in the day, I feel like I 'genuinely like things', not really making an active personal branding decision. As a kid, u do things like 'watch the popular shows on a popular channel', and 'listen to popular music on popular radio stations' without really understanding 'why.' U get the opportunity 2 connect with other kids abt 'watching the same shit', and u can connect, and think 'damn. we have a lot in common.' Used to do stuff like 'play', but now u have to 'pay money to have a unique experience.' Sometimes u even have to go on stubhub/ebay/craigslist 2 pay above market rate for a unique experience.
Sad abt growing up, losing touch with my innerchild, experiencing things like 'joy' or smiling for a reason other than 'laughing @ some1.' Sad that most of my connxns are so inauthentic. Sad that I can't enjoy things. Sad that whenever I 'connect' with some1, I just feel like a 'nostalgic fggt.' H8 when ppl connect abt things that they used 2 watch/listen 2. Wish there was some way to connect with ppl abt who we will become in the future.
Sad that my innerchild is 'dead and gone, dead and gone.'
Srsly feel like the only thing that could have made my childhood better would have been 'having the opportunity to listen to Animal Collective without even knowing what pitchfork/music blogs were.' Feel like I would have really 'enjoyed it' in an organic way.
Please use the comments section of this post to connect with commenters abt what yall have in common from childhood, and how it constructed u in2 the person u r 2day.