Photo via animal
Recently, an NFL quarterback named ‘Michael Vick’ went to jail because he had a huge dogfighting operation in his backyard. From what I understand, he would train pitbulls to fight at high stakes, underground, illegal dog fights. The dogs that were not ‘tough enough’ were drowned, hung, and electrocuted. Somehow, he got caught, then went to prison for like a year or two.
Recently, Mike Vick was released from ‘the slammer.’ He was signed to a new team called the Philadelphia Eagles, and a group of alternative people came out to protest not only his return to society, and particularly his return to the NFL. They believe that he should be ‘in jail forever’ for his crimes against dogmanity. They are also intent on illustrating that Michael Vick is ‘not a role model’, but it seems like modern society has already accepted the fact that athletes are not role models [via Charles Barkley marketing campaign].
Seems ‘obvious’ that these ‘winners of the genetic lottery’ playing professional sports without much of a ‘real education’ are not role models. Seems like it would be sweet to be them, since you get a lot of money to do what you are ‘naturally good at’, but seems very obvious that athletes are ‘not role models.’
It seems like Michael Vick went to prison for ‘longer than rapists go to jail’ and possibly longer than some ‘drunk drivers who kill people’ go to prison. From what I understand, since Mike Vick was ‘famous’, they decided to ‘make an example’ of him, even though he really didn’t hurt a human or anything. It seems like it still might be ‘bad’ that he harmed some living creatures, but still plausibly ‘not as bad’ as harming a human. It seems like there are some people on the planet who love animals more than they love humans.
Dog fighting seems violent. I am not sure what the difference is between dog fighting, boxing, and ‘MMA’ is. It seems like it might all be creatures trying to ‘fucking kill’ one another.
I am not sure why people love dogs so much. It seems like it might be an ‘American thing’ where u r supposed to have a dog in order to have a perfect life. It seems like some people ‘love animals’ more than they love humanity. I feel like there are a lot of people who are the same way with the ‘environment’ or something. It seems most reasonable to ‘care about other humans’ more than anything else.
People really seem to ‘get fired up’ about animal rights.
Here is a group of AZNs doing some metaphorical protest in support of Animal Rights
Here are some lonely men getting their protest on & raising awareness about dog fighting.
It seems like animal rights bros are ‘very angry’ about this, and if they had their way, we would kill Michael Vick in the same way that he killed a bunch of dogs. Like we would dunk him in water, hang him, beat him, and electrocute him.
Should we forgive this ‘criminal’?
I think his excuse was ‘in my poor black community, dog fighting was not only a sport–but a way of life.’ It seems like we shouldn’t hold it against him for wanting to become the greatest dog trainer in the history of the Earth–he honestly might not have known that what he was doing was ‘wrong’, or perhaps he did it all because it was some sort of think piece to inspire us to analyze how humans hurt one another on a daily basis.
Hopefully he will be safe from protesters upon his return to the playing field. Not sure if this picture is real, but worried this might happen to him during a game if he returns.
Do yall know if ‘dog fighting’ is wrong?
Do u know if ‘human fighting’ is wrong?
Is it possibly to ‘rehabilitate’ people from ‘the streets’?
Do football players ‘fight’ and ‘harm one another’ just as much as dogs do when they fight?
Do u support athletes, or are they just ‘ass holes who get paid too much and do stupid things’?
Do dogs have ‘human rights’?
Are ‘underground animal fights’ the new ‘music festivals’?
Previous animal rights coverage
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2009/08/animal-rights.html
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IAmCarles.com
42 Comments
fist
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second
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third. michael cera is across the street filming something.
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Dogmanity = Dogma-nity.
Classic alt pun, Carles!
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So when a girl has an ed hardy bag does this mean she is ‘down to fukc’?
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Hey HO readers I am about to get vulnz with yall. I have a big problem with ‘how I look’. I have a ‘big nose’ kind of like the lead singer of Grizzly Bros has. I just want 2 cum on as man “alt broads” as possible but having a big nose makes it ‘hard to do’. The Lead singer of Grizzly Bears can get ‘hot alt-broads’ like that girl from the Ipod ad who ’sang’ ‘12345′. My problem is I have ‘no talent’ and a mediocre ‘personal brand and am ‘ugly/gross’ so I can’t get any ‘girls’. I have some “middle class’ parents who might ’subsidise’ me to get a ‘nose job’. I think I want to ‘do it’ but I feel like I will be wrecking my personal brand if get “plastic surgery”. Michael Jackson ‘did that’ and his personal brand was wrecked. Will it cause me to hang my babies out the window. Can you guys help me find out if my ‘alt-brand’ will be wrecked if I do this. Can a nosejob be done ironically? By the way ‘I have no bros’ because I am a ‘loser’ with ‘low self-esteem’. Just want to have ‘meaningful expirience’. What Should I do yall? Yall are the best, I love yall.
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//////////Reply by Grown Up All Wrong
//////////Posted September 3rd, 2009 at 4:53 pm
@Big Nose,
BRO YOU NEED 2 JOIN THE ANCO (NOW GBEAR FORUM, UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT) MESSAGE BOARDS
HTTP://COLLECTEDANIMALS.NET
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//////////Reply by dax jax
//////////Posted September 3rd, 2009 at 7:16 pm
@Big Nose, stop trying so hard.
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//////////Reply by dee
//////////Posted September 7th, 2009 at 11:23 am
@Big Nose, considering getting a nose job is extremely ghey. You need to lose the body image issues. Just make sure u practice good hygiene so it doesn’t smell gross “down there”, but u don’t want it perfumed either, somewhere in between.
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1, 2, 3 and to the ‘fo, me and Dr. Dre are standing at your door, circa 1992
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HEY CARLES,
THIS POST NEEDS MOAR GRIZZLY BEAR, LESS ANCO.
KTHX
-G’D UP ALL WRONG
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nice post. should get rude hits.
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seems like blkppl shldnt b allowed 2b roll moddels like at all
dont rly care that mike vick fought animals and killed them or whatever
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At first, I didnt want Vick to come back to the Falcons. He destroyed our city. But now that he is playing for the
Eagles, I want him back. I think a lot of the resentment has worn off and I’m not concerned with PETA. They are not as influential as they think they are. Actually, theyre all dbags.
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why fight at all. why does fighting exist. i wonder who got into the first fight ever and what their reason for fighting was. i dont get it, i dont want to hurt you bro. i dont want to hurt my hands either.
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//////////Reply by bbbbb
//////////Posted September 3rd, 2009 at 6:15 pm
@mr. jeffers, bc it is fun, just ask the inspirational groundbreaking avante gard genius film fight club
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too much blnews (black news) on hro amirite
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//////////Reply by gnar sesh
//////////Posted September 3rd, 2009 at 5:52 pm
@altBro, no
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strongly dislike alternative broads with tatoos and a penchant for activism
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//////////Reply by dax jax
//////////Posted September 3rd, 2009 at 7:17 pm
@daffy, I like them, except for the non-swallowers.
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as a ‘vegetarian’ i think that’s ‘pretty mean’
also kind of ‘what the fuck’ on this topic
wonder if hes some kind of sociopath
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as an iggles fan I am surprised those people didn’t get the shit knocked out of them. at least they aren’t cowboys fans.
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underground dog fights < music festies.
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don’t understand football. plays seem really arbitrary and the fact that you have to stop every several seconds, get into some new arbitrary formation to play for another several seconds does not seem like it would be fun for anyone involved. feel like for sports to be fun4all, there should be some element of ‘constant improvisational play’ between teams.
feel like american football is wizard’s chess (with irl ppl) for stupid ppl
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who is that short football player in the bottom photo
he seems sweet
why is he so short though
what kind of helmet is he wearing (is he even wearing a helmet?)
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carles i miss barbaro like i miss heath
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dogfighting seems like pokemon battling pre19k96
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//////////Reply by brobro
//////////Posted September 3rd, 2009 at 8:11 pm
@moomoo, funniest comment ever.
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1. if they put ‘urban styled’ jerseys, helmets, and pads on the dogs it wouldn’t be wrong
2. human fighting is ok as long as the mexican has heart, the black guy has a good jab, and hte white guy is making all the money
3. people from ‘the streets’ are rehabilitated but they don’t know it because they dont get attention if they act like dr. huxtable
4. football players are trying to help america thru these tough ecominomic times like jesus did on the cross thing
7. there was a dogfighting tent at coachella this year but everyone was at glass candy instead
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stupid bitch on left in top pic is hot
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Donte Stallworth (other footballbro) was ‘driving krunk’ and high and ‘fucking killed some mexi’ and only got 1 month in jail. Feel like Vick should have been electrocuting and hanging animals that were less ‘kewt/adorable,’ maybe like illegal immigrants.
Would u be kicked out of Animal Collective’s fan club 4 dogfighting?
Are pitbulls actually ‘kewt’ or are they the dog version of ‘Kyle Orton’?
Where can I buy an Eagles #7 doggie jersey with Vick’s name 4 my lil doggie?
Will Vick be able to get an endorsement deal with some ‘doggie-killing/torturing’ tool company?
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didnt lol until the last question
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You have gone too far.
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“I love my dog as much as I love you, but you may fade my dog will always come through” [via CATstevensbro].
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carles ur posts went through a bit of a lull but have been ‘fucking brilliant’ recently. you are my masculine ideal.
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//////////Reply by belovedroguebro
//////////Posted September 4th, 2009 at 8:54 am
@vdieselfor20, agreed. shit was wack but now is back.
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“hey yall, its a dog’s life” – the kottymouth kings
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//////////Reply by snags
//////////Posted September 5th, 2009 at 12:40 am
@the fink, are you fink from xs?
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just want 2 see 2 dogs ‘fucking tear into one another’. will pay money. is there sum kind of online live dogfight chat? kinda like how they have online ‘live sex chats’? is there n e kind of ‘off-track wagering’ venue where i culd go see this ‘on the telly’ and have a mixed drink cocktail + onion rings?
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i have a friend who hates men but love dogs. i guess she thinks that dogs will never judge her or betray her. they will just love unconditionally. while men have hurt her repeatedly. must suck to be her. i wonder if she has ever done sexual things to dogs. maybe she smeared peanutbutter in a certain place and let the doberman go nuts?
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Why do you put animal cruelty at one end of the spectrum and “ppl cruelty” at the other? We gotta pick and choose now which is worse, or better? Meanness is meanness. That was stupid.
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I suppose it’s not good, what happened and all… I’m certainly not about to stand outside with a sign complaining about it though. A human fight to the death would be way more entertaining. I don’t get what’s so appealing about dog fights anyways. One time someone left a pitbull tied to the truck outside my parent’s house. That was annoying. Chewed the shit out of everything.
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AZN animALTS. Thats fr3sh
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this post didnt have an OG Carles vibe. seems it may be true that there is more than one “carles”. the writing seemed off. not racist enough. burning questions weren’t burning enough. bring back the real carleser.
@OGcarleser: miss u bro.
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white man trained black men to fight/kill each other, therefore, black man trains dogs to fight/kill each other.
life makes sense again
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people who own dogs as pets like the idea of having a companion, but dogfighters like the idea of “owning a life” and “watching 2 dogs tear the shit out of eachother for profit”. The relationship is exploitative and sick. michael vick deserved the time and shouldn’t have been allowed to play. fuck michael vick.
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ANCO DID WTC
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I wish my pit could have a minute with Vick alone. Feed em to the dogs!
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//////////Reply by ohnouditnt
//////////Posted September 6th, 2009 at 5:22 pm
@Tyler, Vick is a fucking cunt. Ur pitty would chew him & spit him out cos tastes nasty.
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did anyone protest ray lewis when he killed a dude? cuz i dont remember it
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//////////Reply by brobro
//////////Posted September 7th, 2009 at 12:02 am
@this is dumb, *allegedly
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….u c I’m crazy for u, touch me once n u kno its tru.
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that one pic with teh AZns looks like a bunch of cat-people celebrating the fact that Jason Voorhees is about to give some dogs the Abu Gahrib treatment.
Also, is eating considered cruelty?
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