I AM CARLES Halloween Blowout Sale.
In this post, Carles will attempt to utilize his web brand as an 'eCommerce retailing outlet', attempting to brand himself as a 'man of the people' by giving his viewership an opportunity to 'buy shit from his brand.'
Carles announces a 'once in a lifetime sale.' Carles announces the 'Halloween Blowout Sale' of the once popular meme, IAMCARLES. This sale is meant to target people who 'want 2 be Carles' 4 the popular holiday 'Halloween.' For a limited time, the IAMCARLES shirt price has been 'fucking slashed' to $22.
Ordering before Tuesday means that you will get your I AM CARLES at a discounted price. Your shipping will be 'upgraded' to ensure delivery before the Saturday holiday. This is your 'only chance' to get a 'sweet deal' on the IAMCARLES shirt before they are all gone. It feels like I have 'sold a lot of them', but still need a 'sale' to liquidate inventory/ rejuvenate potential interest in t-shirt ownership.
This type of sale will surely 'do in' the last of the of IAMCARLES t-shirt inventory.
Who will u be 4 Halloween?
'Am I getting a good deal for $22?' 'Is Carles worth supporting?' 'Did Carles empty out his annual trustfund stipend before the year was over?'
Is the IAMCARLES tshirt a bad Halloween costume idea?
I AM CARLES HALLOWEEN BLOWOUT SALE--a concept 'sale'
Goal: 2 get ppl 2 buy tshirts and be 'carles' 4 halloween
Gimmick Pros for shoppers: Discounted Price, Upgraded shipping
Cons: Still potentially 'overpriced.'
Fun ideas: put fake blood on Carles shirt, and u can be 'Carles after a Juggalo killed him'
Price: $22 (includes expedited shipping)
Buy Now at this URL: http://iamcarles.com/
'On Halloween, u will put on ur IAMCARLES shirt, and transform into a relevant blog. This is the perfect costume for the modern world.'
CARLES PROUDLY ANNOUNCES The Teenz 4 t-shirts program
Carles has also heard many stories about teens with no debit cards/paypal accounts/etc. He has launched the T-shirts for Tweens Program, which is dedicated to the mission of giving under-18-year olds the same consumer opportunities to 'waste money on internet products.' The program is meant to enable teens to purchase Carles goods through non-paypalian methods.
Please contact me at carleser [at] gmail.com if you are a teen/miscellaneous adult who does not trust 'online commerce.' When was ur first bank account/debit card? Do u wish u could only use cash so u couldn't 'waste money on shit' on the internet?
Visit I AM CARLES.com now to participate in this sale.
'The Brand is stronger/weaker than ever, and we must capitalize b4 we all die.'
-Jesus Christ, God, and the Virgin Mary in a 'branding' strategy session
'I honestly feel like I am still creating compelling content when I make a whore-ish post.'
-Carles, commenting on the state of the blogosphere/journalism/music criticism+tastemaking