
Hey yall… Just doing some last minute Halloween shopping… I’m in the candy aisle, and I’m having a difficult time weighing what is important to trick or treaters vs. my budget in the current economic recession vs. how I want to ‘brand’ my house as a destination for trick or treaters. Not sure if I need to ‘invest’ in a gourmet selection, or if I should just buy ‘a shit load of cheap shit’ since kids don’t even know what they life.
It seems like u can get a really good deal on the Tootsie Roll variety bag, but I’m not sure if kids like that kind of candy. I feel like this variety bag lets people know that ur poor, and trick or treaters don’t matter 2 u.

Might try to ‘look like a baller’ and hand out full-size candy bars. Since I live in a neighborhood with multi-million dollar homes, we might be expected to hand this shit out.

‘Fun size’ seem good in theory, but I think people eat 5-10 fun size bars at a time, then don’t really have a ‘fun’ experience with the candy brand. Seems like people feel ‘guilty’ then grab their love handles.

Do yall know if it is still alt 2 hand out apples with razors in them?

Might participate in my local dentist office’s candy-buyback program. Seems like a great community initiative 2 decrease cavities in our local community.

Does n e1 know what I should be for Halloween?
Does n e1 know a good candy 2 hand out without ruining ur brand?
Does n e 1 know which candy won’t make u look like a poor/cheap ass hole?
What r u gonna be/do 4 Halloween?
Do yall ever wish Halloween lasted all year so that u could pretend 2 b some1 else 4ever?

What r u doing 2nite?















38 Comments
first
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goddamn almost made it
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be a dickpiss
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Fourth!!!!!
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Feel Almond Joy is pretty authentic.
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i live in the ghetto, so kids don’t come to my house, and the kids that live here go to uppermiddleclass/white areas. if they did come i’d prob let them have a bite off of my vegan sandwich or somethin
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damn thats ine kute azn :D
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//////////Reply by Keutie
//////////Posted October 31st, 2009 at 4:00 pm
@MEMEs,
True, I thought right away “i bet she has a keut vag (via sideways taco) o_O
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kids don’t even know what they life
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//////////Reply by fairydick
//////////Posted October 31st, 2009 at 5:10 pm
@altigator, totally.
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//////////Reply by Tror
//////////Posted October 31st, 2009 at 5:13 pm
@fairydick,
I lol’d
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//////////Reply by BlipsterCambridge
//////////Posted November 1st, 2009 at 4:30 pm
@altigator,
They really don’t.
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im gona go get mad fucked and chill with ma bitch tho for real. i may or may not be dressed like donnie darko. if u c me don’t ‘kick my ass’. deus ex machina.
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Carles for sure is going to be handing out the big candy bars, with that Hornitos advertising cash he’s pulling in.
I need to find out where you live to get some treats from your house.
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//////////Reply by Funky Rutabaga
//////////Posted October 31st, 2009 at 9:36 pm
@JAVONAVO, I thought Carles was going to hand out Hornitos.
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in my local area as a child there was a house with a .3 mile long driveway that gave out donuts and cider for hallows eve, maybe that would make you look rich.
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//////////Reply by Chrises
//////////Posted November 1st, 2009 at 4:23 am
@ballinout, 3/10 of a mile is the scariest fraction of a mile there is
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handing out dime-bags of dope to trick or treat ors
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//////////Reply by flowers4alger-anon
//////////Posted November 2nd, 2009 at 8:59 am
@cobones, n e leftovers?
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Chocolat ‘jesus pieces’
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WHAT I’M HANDING OUT THIS #HALLOWEEN
(the alt-candy checklist)
-5th Ave
-Whatchamacallit
-Fun Dip (just the sticks—>more authentic?)
-Blow Pops
-Nik-L-Nip
-Spree
-Bottle Caps
-Bubbilicious [via watermelon wave///Bron-Bron's Lightin' Lemondane]
-Bit-O-Honey
miss U shaq bars
h8 u milky way
<3 U snickers
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//////////Reply by Bebe
//////////Posted October 31st, 2009 at 3:38 pm
@Bear, who r u
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//////////Reply by nards
//////////Posted October 31st, 2009 at 4:33 pm
@Bebe,
if this is actually bebe, u need 2 give up the goods
(live hard sell hard)
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//////////Reply by Bear
//////////Posted October 31st, 2009 at 5:00 pm
@Bebe, who are YOU??
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//////////Reply by Faisal
//////////Posted October 31st, 2009 at 6:38 pm
@Bear, she’s bebe duh
//////////Reply by Bear
//////////Posted October 31st, 2009 at 9:37 pm
@Bebe, @faisal ahh, I get it now…
@THE_REAL_BB hey! my name’s Barak.. friends call me Bear! :) hope you liked my candy picks lol.. some personal favorites. well have a good halloween! hope you get some of your fav. candy! maybe i’ll see ya again on here if you post a lot, I check this site quite a bit now. haha later!
-BZ
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//////////Reply by Bebe
//////////Posted November 1st, 2009 at 5:07 am
@Bear,
Let Me fuck your mouth.
going 2 chili’s tonite. meet me there carles?
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Drunk and Party!!!
Tonight is the Night!!
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stink bombs, poppers, condies!
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go to a lil’ chinese market in an orental community and by some chinese candy. it makes you look like you are all cosmo and shit, but really their stuff is way cheap
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//////////Reply by Funky Rutabaga
//////////Posted October 31st, 2009 at 5:12 pm
@mae, Feel it’s authentic to hand out lotus cakes to trick-or-treaters (via cultural awareness).
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//////////Reply by BlipsterCambridge
//////////Posted November 1st, 2009 at 5:12 am
@mae,
Hey, are you the Mae that goes to my school?
I’m secretly glad your twin sis moved back to the Philippines so I could tell you apart.
had a crush on you for a while now.
Think you should stop hanging out with sergio and chill with me, he’s a teenage dad.
Tell me yes so I can stop wondering?////////
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//////////Reply by buckfuttons
//////////Posted November 1st, 2009 at 9:22 am
@mae, hai, are you the mae that comments on the nylon webby?
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//////////Reply by Bebe
//////////Posted November 1st, 2009 at 9:52 pm
@mae, Hai, are you the Mae that went out with me in middle school?
….wanna give it another go?
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//////////Reply by uh
//////////Posted November 21st, 2009 at 12:20 am
@mae, hi are you the mae that
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nerds rope is pretty alt. if you write the company and tell them u like nerds rope they send you a coloring book full of pictures of willy wonka…
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you should be ‘balloon boy’ for halloween, but if you pull off the balloon portion of the costume better than I do, you are dead to me.
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scooping dry oatmeal into pillowcases 2nite
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Supermarket candy is so 2k8 (except for Almond Joy). Think I may be giving out candy from Whole Foods this year.
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Peta approved junk food
http://www.peta.org/accidentallyVegan/VeganShoppingQS-Snacks.asp?Category=Snacks
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reeses peanut butter cups are the the snack of choice for the elite wasp
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//////////Reply by brobro
//////////Posted November 1st, 2009 at 1:17 am
@Ronald Reagan, Fuck yeah.
<3 u Reese. <3 ur PB cups.
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you should hand out ‘odwalla bars’.
healthy and stylish. and definitely delicious!
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Here’s my solution: get some cheap candy from an Asian grocery store. A good way to promote multiculturalism and save money while subverting economic class rank.
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shoulda made caramel apples w/ y’all.
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//////////Reply by flowers4alger-anon
//////////Posted November 2nd, 2009 at 8:51 am
@:(, lol
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midevil altbro rcssn edtn
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Carles, i dressed up as relevant blogger Carles, of a blog called “Hipsters Running OFF.”
Trick or treated in suburbia. Felt like old ppl (30+) didn’t ‘get’ my costume. Felt superior 2 them. Felt like they weren’t self-/internet culture-aware enough 2 ‘get’ it.
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//////////Reply by simonsez
//////////Posted November 1st, 2009 at 7:09 am
@brobro, u r semi-respectable and i dont say that to every bro.
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dont know. but that girls outfit makes me wanna gag [via cheap halloween candy]
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who’s making the official alt X-mas list?
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Cliff bars
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Some lil kids came to the door during my party at midnight and I opened the door and told them its 5 dollars to drink. For some reason they ran away.
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//////////Reply by OhNoOhMy
//////////Posted November 3rd, 2009 at 1:01 pm
@OrangePencil, lol’d
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grizzly bear r playing in my town tomorrow but i have nobody 2 go with. :-(. should i go on my own??
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//////////Reply by Jay-z
//////////Posted November 1st, 2009 at 4:28 pm
@zara,
Why didn’t you ask me?
I’m the biggest Grizzly Bear fan ever.
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played a show in smokeland at some rockabilly sex party. saw some pregnant bitches smogin dope.
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dum-dums are always a safe bet, and they are inexpensive. Halloween staple!
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OMFG , if every post came with a keut azn, this would be the best blog ever. CRLS I will actually buy a few I AM CARLES t shirts to give as christmas gifts if you post moar azns. or Bebe. Or just alt JB in general. What ever happened to alt tits or nude party pics.
All you ever do is blog about relevant societal bullshit that no one cares about man. the haydays of HRO were about tits azns and bangers, prove me wrong.
tl;dr: more azns, alt JB, tits etc. I dont come here for the pics of candy.
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put on a ‘black polo shirt’ and made myself a name tag and went 2 chilis and pretended 2 work there. made mad tips + got crazy drunk/fucked a bartender in the walk in. best halloween evrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
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