Hey tweeple… Not sure if this blog is for me any more. Had a good run, but maybe this is it. Plenty of other alt sites out there to choose from. Dropped some sweet memes, made some cool new internet friends, but maybe my future is in ‘real life’ instead of the internet.
You did your best, Carles. You were a good blog.
Best,
Carles















234 Comments
i still read this blog occasionally, told my little brother about it, he goes to a new england elitist liberal arts college
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//////////Reply by broseph stalin
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:24 pm
@tragedy in toyland, u were the last 1st and u didn’t evn say 1st…
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//////////Reply by James
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 10:19 pm
@broseph stalin,
Nope. this was done was because carles wants to become a trending topic on twitter.
this is pure gimmick, albeit very smart.
i see behind/beyond his intentions.
i’m the best.
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//////////Reply by Stu
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 10:08 pm
@broseph stalin wtf
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//////////Reply by broseph stalin
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:24 pm
@tragedy in toyland, u were the last 1st and u didn’t evn say 1st…
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//////////Reply by tragedy in toyland
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:44 pm
@broseph stalin, last lol
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//////////Reply by Fredrick James
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 10:11 pm
@tragedy in toyland, I feel like I ‘graduated’ HRO a while ago, but I def know some people who could benefit from reading the archives. maybe crls could compile a Kindle version…
//////////Reply by eyepatch
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 11:19 pm
@tragedy in toyland, listen 2 bangerz and drinkin sparkz in remembrance, will probably listen to chillwave later…
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//////////Reply by Pcm
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:31 am
You can’t quit! HRO is the top result in google when you search ‘how to be alt’!
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//////////Reply by J
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 9:32 am
never gonna give you up
never gonna let you down
never gonna turn around
and desert you
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//////////Reply by dave
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 6:12 pm
http://ex-fandes60s.blogspot.com/2009/11/goodbye-carles-you-were-great.html
i dedicate this post to you carles.
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//////////Reply by Sofie.saur
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 8:13 pm
The blog should never die.
This was one of the best things on the internet.
It was my daily escape from algebra.
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prolly could make more money selling memes to corporate america. this is the best blog on my computer
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@epic
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miss u bb ;_;
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no.
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yes
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//////////Reply by douchemetal
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:04 am
@REMBRANDT FON RIGN,
no
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u.’complete.’ me. don’t ‘off urself’
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noooo, best blog bud
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the internet will have a metaphorical ‘gaping hole’ in it’s ‘bleeding heart’ if u leave.
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Nooooooooo! Stay!
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Bad idea carles
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pls dont do that to me D:
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It’s like when bands pretend the show is over and then come out for an encore when they hear enough applause/chanting
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//////////Reply by Clara
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 11:09 pm
@plzfollow, I agree with you, this is another kinda desperate call for attention, tho he did it!
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all i can hear in my head is ‘hide in seek’ by the imygen heaps as carls metaphorically kills hipster runoff..
#RIPhipsterrunoff
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//////////Reply by jimmieofarc
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:23 pm
@jimmieofarc, *hide and seek
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//////////Reply by JustDima
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:40 pm
@jimmieofarc, *Imogen Heap
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//////////Reply by jessica.
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:09 am
@JustDima,
Jimmiziez fartziez was just tryna be ‘post ironic’
plz leave him alone?
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//////////Reply by JustDima
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:37 am
@jessica., Sorry
//////////Reply by chong
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:54 am
@jimmieofarc,
mmmwuchasayyyyy
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bye
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NOOOOOOOOOO!
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HRO 4EVE YA’LL!
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//////////Reply by Holiday,celebrate
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 11:27 pm
@e, first read that as HRO EVE, as in tomorrow is HRO and tonight is it’s eve.
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kind of sad but also happy you finally got a gf ;\
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:(
i don’t like the sound of this
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before you go.. reveal yourself. i wanna judge
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Carles dunno if you ‘retire’ then if any ‘blog’ would be worth reading. Say it ain’t so bro!
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DO IT FAGGOT. NOTHING OF VALUE WILL BE LOST. YOUR PSEUDO MEMES WILL STOP POLLUTING THE BLOGOSPHERE AND ENTRY LEVELS WILL HAVE NOWWHERE TO LEARN HOW TO BE AUTHENTIC THUS MAKING TRUE ALTNESS AN EVEN MORE EXCLUSIVE IDENTITY.
ALSO: FUCK YEAH CAPS>
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//////////Reply by kitty
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:28 pm
@DAT ASS, caps lock is cruise control for cool
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//////////Reply by d00dz
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 10:39 pm
@DAT ASS,
I AGREE, STOP TALKING BOUT IT AND BE BOUT IT BITCH. MUTHAFUCKIN CRUISE CONTROL!!!11!!!11ONE
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ugh bb please i need u
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see ya
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DON’T FUCKING LEAVE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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miss.
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//////////Reply by b4hc
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:28 pm
@b4hc, u r perf.
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crls what if i start a fb group && get ‘a fuckload of people’ to sign a ‘petition’ for you not to leave??
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//////////Reply by tragedy in toyland
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:46 pm
@broseph stalin, http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/group.php?gid=59306991210
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//////////Reply by broseph stalin
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:49 pm
@tragedy in toyland, roflz already a member
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also you should have inserted some sort of ‘relevant’ elliott smith song to this post. that bro offed himself, much like u metaphorically have ;_;
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//////////Reply by brobot
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:54 pm
@kitty,
dont u no its been 2 late 4 the longest time
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whatevs..
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hate to say it, but i think it’s time.
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cya doucher
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I will kill myself if you stop posting on HRO.
The Internet would be like if Lady Gaga was only female and not male, too.
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//////////Reply by d00dz
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 10:42 pm
@namefag, do it, post pics
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It’s about time…This blog should have offed itself over a year ago…
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//////////Reply by caroline
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:36 pm
@Wildwood, you could have just …stopped reading?
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//////////Reply by Wildwood
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 10:06 am
@caroline, then how would i trick entry level alt chicks into bed w/ me?
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wont b as authentic now carles off’d himself. gonna have 2 go back & read every post again
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might ‘off myself’
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And why dont just take a break?
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w8 what are these ‘other alt sites’ i must know
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//////////Reply by brn
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:38 pm
@brian,
ikr. me too!
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//////////Reply by grant golland
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 12:04 am
@brn, webcomics
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nooooooooooooooooooo carlos no lo hagas!!!!!!!!!!
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//////////Reply by marisol
//////////Posted December 1st, 2009 at 3:17 pm
@poly, lol’z
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saw this and literally wanted to cry. embarrassed that a blog meant something [so much] to me.
actually not embarrassed. its so annoying to be ashamed that i care about things.
sucks that i am not cool enough to not give a shit :(
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//////////Reply by broseph stalin
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:38 pm
@caroline, all the alts need to look after each other in this time of mourning.
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//////////Reply by bob
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 12:32 am
@broseph stalin, I think I hear taps playing in the background
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can think of a post-carles world.
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goodbye carles
now i have something to look fwd to:
the return of HRO sometime between tomorrow and 2K10
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just in time to make the cut of ‘best fake retirement of the aughts’ list.
1. Jay Z
2. Santigold
3. Carles
4. Bon Iver
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no crls
no nonononono
:””’[
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srsly carles, don’t leave. i appreciate your desire to engage in more “real world” on goings, but that doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice hro. our generation needs your insights, otherwise we are just a clueless herd of unguided alts. like kids waiting in a three block long line-up for an american apparel rummage sale.
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Carles, plz don’t off blog yourself. If u do i’ll like cry and I don’t think that’s alt :’-(
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//////////Reply by lil bro
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 11:54 pm
@Lux, sheddin tearz for other altz is very alt
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carles – don’t leave, the internets need your blog
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fine by me, butthole.
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NO
‘Is this really what you want?’
(I hope you’re still releasing that ep, btdubs)
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this is about the third/fourth time. think you need some xannies or zolofties, crls. concerned about ur ‘mental health’.
love/h8/miss u
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//////////Reply by chong
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:57 am
@megatitz,
yea y is evry1 buggin out, hes gunna pretend this didnt happen tomorro
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Give ur blog 2 Bebe Zeva
Think shes ‘culturally relevant’
Miss u (if you rlly ‘off’ urself this time)
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//////////Reply by Bovice is the man
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 11:45 pm
@unouomedude, Yeah I agree, Follow that BeBe bitch on twitters and she rocks my world.
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Don’t go!
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FUCK don’t go n_n
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//////////Reply by anonymous
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 6:44 am
@jack, i don’t think n_n is an appropriate emoticon
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hro is like pitchfork or aldaily or street peeper to me, aka a website that fulfills a very particular need and that is always there and that i am always happy to read even when the posts are silly.
it’s like a friend who is not always totally mindblowing but sometimes surprises you and is really friggin brilliant and awesome but is just generally pleasant.
but who knows the best arty/cultural periodicals for instance always have short lifespans and if it depended on me everything would go on forever so WHO KNOWS u know better than me anywayz carlitos
i’m gonna miss u
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//////////Reply by bob
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 12:34 am
@gaston, well said…
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Fuck Carles what’s your problem
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carlos,
maybe i will see you with tao lin in washington sq park sometime soon.
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//////////Reply by gaston
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 10:15 pm
@tragedy in toyland, did you know that tao lin’s best-selling novel “shoplifting from american appy” is really a novel about carles
maybe this + coinage of “chillwave” has raised carlos to a level of importance where blogging becomes too frivolous
i’m happy for him but it’s a bummer bc i like reading hro but w/e
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damn
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Droste already did it.
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http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2009/05/fuck-everything.html
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feel like i just got ‘dumped’ w/out breakup sex :(
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you should do it.
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Been reading this Blog for over 2yrs…… i barely read it anymore (just skim) i don’t read comments anymore…except for now.
think its time to let it go Carles…… its over
death of Alt bro :(
+
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I have no one to blame but myself
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//////////Reply by smith
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 10:04 pm
@flowers4algernon, phony. you aren’t the real flowers
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//////////Reply by flowers4algernon
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 11:08 pm
@smith, agreed, just hoping the real one would come back. miss u flowers
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//////////Reply by HOMOSAPIEN_FUCK
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 12:46 am
@flowers4algernon, bro was overrated
//////////Reply by brobro
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 4:32 am
@flowers4algernon, flowers4algie was the ‘wavves’ of 2k9.
//////////Reply by graa
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 6:03 am
@flowers4algernon, wherez the final g’bye?
C’mon Carles. All these people you make fun of regularly missing the point and trying to be like you in every internet way possible I’m sure is depressing, but what would they do without you?
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Carles,
HRO is the backbone of the alt community. Please don’t pull an Ed Broste. Hope this retirement is a hoax. If you leave, who will take over HRO and how will remain relevant? Is HRO going to become obsolete?
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It’s dumb of u to stop posting. You were just getting started.
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I will still leave HRO in my bookmarked RSS feeds so when people go on my computer they can see how relevant I am/was. It’s more or less the only reason I read HRO anyway, to be obscure and post-ironic
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at least we can say… we were apart of something.. larger than ourselves.
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//////////Reply by herro
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 9:57 pm
@herro, //////want my news feed back.
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im crying. please don’t go.
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I feel like this happens every month…
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//////////Reply by Carles
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 10:03 pm
@andrew,
Get me a tampon…
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i will miss u so much plz dont go
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CARLES PLZ DON’T GO. I CAN ONLY LOL WITH U NOW. NO1 ELSE.
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Please don’t retire. : (
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noooooooooooooooo please, don’t.
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publicity stunt.
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Crls, you’ve made me laugh and you’ve made my cry [via laughing 'too hard']
fuck the internet
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damn.
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Looking in, I read some tweets. I deleted my facebook last spring and really haven’t looked back, so I totally understand the appeal of ‘offing yrself’ but I hope the show can continue. (especially fond of the alt report). This is a highly personal decision though: godspeed you black emperor.
email me if there’s anything I can do to help/ if you want to videochat.
HERE 4 U HRO BRO
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you’ve had a good run of it carls… but its time to let go
good night carles good night
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imma let you finish, but ‘Jesus Christ’ had the best fake retirement of all time [via death/resurrection]
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//////////Reply by autista
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 10:23 pm
@smith, i like it
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//////////Reply by clarence
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 4:23 am
@autista, how will carles retirement affect “jesus christ” (the indie band)?
worried, yall.
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Now all I want 4 xmas is an HRO return.
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shut the fuck up carles and get back on the internet
fu
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I’m with @grant golland. Feel free to lemme know if I can help. We need you, Carles. I need you, Carles.
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//////////Reply by grant golland
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 12:09 am
@snowden, and I like free entertainment! I’m actually chill with this thing going if Jesus Christ is becomes a presence.
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//////////Reply by grant golland
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 12:20 am
@grant golland, lol extra is
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MIRACLE WHIPPIT
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we need you around mang, please stay. how else will I know what is relevent? If it wernt for you I would still be wearing polo shirts, cargo shorts, and nikes. I would have never found skinny jeans, dirty hoodies, and TOMS.
if its true.
PEACE OUT! you had a good run, always thought someday my bands personal brand would be blogged about here, but I guess that day will never come.
GOOD LUCK WITH REAL LIFE! its tuff.
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if you’re actually leaving, you better reveal your name/identity. your retirement meme will be 100% more talked about if you do.
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Carlesbro, man you need to come back, I only have 2 tabs permanently on my flock browser.
HRO and Lookbook.nu(which I learned about on your blog)
Don’t kill my favorite blog, don’t ‘off yourself’, u helped me ride the chillwave, u introduced me to the cobrasnakes. U give me funny picsnvidz to show my girlfriend, U helped me rummage through pitchfork to find the best music.
U made me want to move from Houston to Austin
And you even hlpd me overcome my depression.
Evn if you don’t restart it, can you aim or email me something cool every so often?
Aim: squallandboco
Yahoo: Squall1158@yahoo.com
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not that i don’t luff you but you should tots give it up
send off by posting one picture of yourself outside with the sun somehow in it
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hello. i am an entry level alt. i wish to diversify my influx of alternative information. would any of you kind people have recommendations. not sure if this is a true ‘death threat’ or he is ‘fucking faking it’.
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NO PLZ.
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carles does this like every few months. the return of the king will happen soon. i’d like to see carles get a genius grant so he can work hard enough to have a breakthrough and take blogging to the fucking next level [via Synecdoche, New York].
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[:|]
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w8ing for the Hipster Spinoff blog. Who will do it? It better be of lesser quality, or be a parody of ’spinoffs’ [via the Cleveland Browns, the black cartoon bro, not the team]
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Must have been all these advertisements that made him forget the real reason he was blogging in the first place.
Face it, we’ll all become nothing but mnstrmrs if he doesn’t come back.
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Loved the blog. Definitely funniest site out there. Miss u CRLS.
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FUCK THAT DONT BREAK MY ALT <3
<3u
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plz dont carles, its the only thing that gets me thru school
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who cares what WE want
listen carles do what u wanna do!!!!!!
use ur threadless+hornitos ad money to travel the world
settle down with some nice chick/dude, make/adopt some cute lil alts, maybe they can have successful blogs in the future and you can live vicariously thru them
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honesty: tired of watching you not-try so hard. we’re all totally not-embarrassed for you cause its the internet, but please do something else. i’m told there is a lot to do in life besides overtly bad post-hip sarcasm. the only reason i haven’t deleted you from my RSS is because i am god damn lazy and its occasionally sadistically fun to laugh AT you. try to understand that the concept of a personal brand exists only for wankers whose fathers hate children enough to raise their own in LA. you just look like a confused, predictably insincere (cause you’re clearly not mentallychallenged) tool. get some personal business and learn to mind it. i commend you for your consistent updates in your (fucking obnoxious) blog-voice until now, but that’s about it. good luck with the tshirt sales.
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//////////Reply by Scrambled Fetus
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 11:23 pm
@jim,
Amen, amen, and thank you!
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//////////Reply by skybeard
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 12:02 am
@jim,
sweet, someone with the ‘above that shit’ personal brand
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Those who know, do not say;
Those who say, do not know
- Lao-Tzu
Thanks Carles.
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boy good job with the damage control there that is some heavy shit. some1 send lao tzu some tofurky. the truth is not meant to hurt but to teach. i’m sure you have something to actually offer the world. good luck with that.
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//////////Reply by P.R.
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 11:02 pm
@jim, A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves.
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//////////Reply by jim
//////////Posted November 29th, 2009 at 11:22 pm
@P.R., first: comments/corrections on my posts: post-hip sarcasm or meta-alt ‘comedy’? this is almost an interesting question except that either term describes some the most appallingly useless and non-informative, actual-critique-fearing writing ever conceived. second, the truth = my honesty ..and again it is not meant to hurt, but to hopefully convince your lame-ass to contribute to society i guess? just arguing in favor of carles’ silence.
finally, i almost agree with you but refuse to vive you credit for such a lame paradox which you in no way fulfill. who do you think sees you as any kind of leader? and explain how you are not as visible as can be on the internet. who are you trying to kid? wtf are you trying to lead? i get the joke but the fact is it is a stupid, valueless joke. yr not funny. i am done now. good luck with the next thing!
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//////////Reply by 555
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 12:06 am
@jim,
dude, shut the fuck up, seriously. I wish someone who knows you in real life would have the balls to tell you that you’re a fucking pseudo-intellectual bore.
//////////Reply by P.R.
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 12:34 am
@jim, The deeper issue is why you believe the universe is benevolent, because when you invest in an institution or another person, you are investing in the External, which runs counter to your Inner Truth. Why would you surrender to anything that by its very nature invalidates your greatest asset – Intuitive Wisdom?
//////////Reply by jim
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:18 am
@P.R. the word is Synergy, carles. cooperation. working with other people to create something of use, worth, value. fuck your ego and your inner truth. the world has needs so step in line with our backwards but privileged service economy and please shut up until you have something worthwhile to say in your own voice. the universe is only benevolent in so much as you earn others’ respect and gratitude, and judging from these comments, i think you could improve. step #1 de1337 the blog.
//////////Reply by jim
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:31 am
@Carles, or keep it around as a reminder of your noble waste of time for years to come! choose your own adventure dogg. good luck with the External, hope yr inner truth quits lying to you :)
fuck… 1st mylie, then grizzbear bro, then carles bro, i definitely can’t handle this shit during the holidays :(
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don’t leave my life carles, you’re all i have left
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carles,
it was a good blog. you should have stopped seven months ago, but i understand. everyone clings to their fame a little too long. it’s good that you realize your time is up. farewell.
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this is the only blog I read regularly, don’t leave us Carles
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‘Shucks’ ‘guys’. He’ll be ‘back’. ‘No Sweat’.
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Relevancy loses its meaning without you Carles.
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i think its time.
havent rlly laffed at ur posts in a while
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//////////Reply by shaka zulu
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 8:03 am
@le CEECEE, word.
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damn.
i guess this is growing up.
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itz cause ya’ll talked shit on hornitos i hope u guyz are happy
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dislikes this. :(
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tears idle tears i know not what they mean :(
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I bleed neon, these colors don’t run. HRO 4EAE
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carles has gone the way of sparks
his memes will live on 4evr
h8 u / miss u alrdy
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//////////Reply by laurn
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 12:38 am
emptiness below teh alt report making me rly nervous…
…
…
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crls, i understand where ur coming from. sad that this is potentially ‘the end,’ but also hope it makes my ‘i am carles’ t-shirt that much more esoteric. still don’t rly think ur gonna ‘go thru w/ it,’ but sometimes u just need a lil break. go outside, get some ‘fresh air,’ and decompress or whatevs. then u can return w/ some ‘extremely relevant & hilarious’ posts when ur feelin inspired again.
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we love you carles, there may be other alt blogs but there’s nothing else like HRO.
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We’ll “miss” you, bro. Alt on.
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if carles ends HRO with this ’suicide note’-esqe post i will have lost all faith in having no faith via nihilism and TheVoid.
that and i was left wanting something more that snarky commentary on tofurkey. i need this, to fill the hole in my life left by the bottom rung of the ladder replacing the top and my beaux comprimising my virtue.
don’t leave me.
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most authentic relevant blog on the internet. plz dont die.
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damm
would still like to hear JC the indie band’s EP
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better cut deep
before ya go to sleep
or in the morning you the one that’s gonna have ta clean
<3 you
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honestly, carles,
here is a piece of the ladies collective mind.
you limited yourself with your kitsch. your blog became irrelevant as soon as the genres you specialized in did. no one cares about steve aoki. or fucking stupid photos off cobra snake. shit dude.
we totally owe you mad nods. you are a memesphere-fore-runner. an e-precedent setting cultural powerhouse. but now you are passe.
even the best memes have to end.
(see digipets, brad pitt, pogs, nintendo gamecube, jack in the box).
quit while you are ahead.
you can read more wisdom here:
http://butterxface.blogspot.com
love
-D & the BxF girls (aka: the “next HRO minus all that irrelevant fashion pontification” music/meme/blog)
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//////////Reply by broseph stalin
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:10 am
@Denise, more like HRO minus everything that’s ‘fucking awesome’ about ‘the criticism of a subculture’
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//////////Reply by Denise
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:19 am
@broseph stalin, when you make money off that shit, you aren’t criticizing, you are sucking their dicks for cheeseburgers.
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//////////Reply by carolina
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 2:05 am
@Denise, no, no, broseph stalin is right.
//////////Reply by gaston
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 2:50 am
@Denise, gamecube is still relevant (2 me)
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Quite dissapointed… I had just recently discovered the hilarity that is HRO. Hope this is just another joke because Ill be very sad if it isnt…
:(
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this is just a cry for attention.
delete the entire blog you pussy.
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//////////Reply by broseph stalin
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 1:07 am
@joel, don’t do it crls, that’s like me throwing away naked pix of my xgf
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miss u crlsr
it was a good brand
u will make a lesser but more accessible rebranding someday
and that rebrand will be the rebranding of a rebrand
that will rebrand the way we rebrand forever
but the hpstr is dead
there is no more runoff to analyze
therefore the crlsr is dead
there is no more snark to be ultrasnarkie abt
seems okay
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You’re supposed to do this *after* the book deal [via other like-minded but ultimately inferior blogs].
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carles… i know that internet suicide has been a trendy topic lately, but don’t look to miley cyrus for cues. we luv u dood!
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CARLESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
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hro
4eae
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yay!! Boooooooooooo.. yay?
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but who is carles?
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Did i call it r wha? Check ma comment in the last post.
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You should ask your ads for more money
and do better coke.
this is a result of your poetry phase?
Bad hangover?
I want more updates less bullshit.
and Hornitos ad to come back.
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if you internet suicide i will real suicide.
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fuck you, crles.
not because im sad of ur leaving,
but because i tire of ur gimmicks.
maybe it is a good thing that ur ‘retiring.’
feel like u don’t ‘get’ us anymore
if u feel like the only way to ‘grab our attention’
is 2 tell us that ur leaving us.
bye for now/ever.
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what about jesus christ the indie band
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feel like carles is just feeling angsty. don’t really want him/them to commit internet suicide. but if he does, i hope there isn’t an annoying video like hanny montanny.
but srsly, without carles, where will my friends and i get our inside jokes that exclude everyone/make everyone feel inferior to our alt knowledge? worried…
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you were a good blog. we don’t know how to quit you.
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when he found out the reality, he doesnt want to be a racist anymore.
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I am legitimately upset right now.
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//////////Reply by nerdAlt
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 2:04 pm
@nostalgicdad n 2k50,
im really upset
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get new/better writers
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you should have given me at least a week of warning or two years like oprah
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I think carles is alive
carlesisdead.com
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//////////Reply by skybeard
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 4:10 am
@agg c.,
I’d be more upset if this is Carles’ ‘official’ eulogy. seems hastily done with a minimal understanding of the ‘breadth’ of his work. maybes you should delete it and start over, this time with a good night’s sleep that doesn’t involve Unisom/Benadryl
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Best blog of the decade! At least give us another month of alt breasts and bangers, so you can go out with 2009. Ritual is key.
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so far away from ‘1st’
jesus
so far away
[chorus]
damn
so far away
from 1st
damn
[musical outro]
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//////////Reply by lizard
//////////Posted December 1st, 2009 at 7:46 pm
@tao, LOVE YOU
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if u go thru w/ this, ‘iamcrls shirt burner bro’ will win.
don’t do it </3
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i will follow u in2 the dark
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I dunno
feel like carles “means it” every time he retires
feel like this time he “means it but it actually will happen”
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u should “be a marine biologist” tho
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h8 u
<3 u
miss u
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nooo i will die
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noooo im be dprsd w/o u
ur mai xanxz :3
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Goodbye everyone…..I hope day that all of you will get it.
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//////////Reply by possum
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 8:01 am
@Carles,
“Plenty of other alt sites out there to choose from” . . .
#1 thats rly passv-aggrsv
#2 u 4got 2 link 2 them 4 us
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//////////Reply by yea
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 7:27 pm
@Carles, yea Carles is this how ur leaving without linking these other sites for us? LAME!
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your blog is thoughtful and inspired as it takes a deep look into a varied and often times confusing subculture that typically off shoots into new subcultures.
additionally, your point of view is refreshing and satirical without being heavy and pretentious. if you retire from blog writing, not only will your fan base be sad, but you will also lose the ad revenue you make from hipsterrunoff.com, which, in reality, is easy revenue.
also, <3 u will miss u if u leave
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wtf crls?
I already see the story unfoldin… ‘internet suicide of the decade’
i guess ill just create one of these ‘blogs’ to pick up where u left off. u changed my life…not rly and anybody who actually says that is lyin but u did post some pretty meaninful stuff. dont no wut 2 do when a new bloggable hypeworthy animal collective internet meme begins…
rip crls
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ps i guess i’ll just have to sit back and settle down with my “pure agave tequila” hornitos…
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look how many fanz you have now crls
208 cmnts?!
we never used to post ‘fursts’
miss u already crls
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might be time to let it go. this blog has gone mainstream and back since it’s creation though, and started lots of good memes. i can’t even look at apostrophes without thinking of you. you posted this today and i read about it via a random tweet. i think you have succeeded?
-that dude from the video two summers ago when it was still ironic/self-aware to be into this blog before it looped through post-irony and post-post-irony before settling on ‘google adsense’
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feel like i’m just starting to connect with other ‘alt peeps’. carles. don’t leave me. you did so much for the ‘community’ and i miss you already.
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going 2 blow coke off my iPhone & crack open a can of Sparks from my hoard in mmry of crls
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Hey Crls, It’s my b-day 2day!
Oh, yeah you should have killed this blog decades ago.
Props though, you had a good run.
8 out of 10 runoffs
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i will cry 100 days.
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//////////Reply by b4hc
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 5:42 am
@Alix, <3
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NO YOU CAN’T LEAVE CARLES I LUV U BBY <3333 THIS BLOG IS THE HIGHLIGHT OF MY DAY!
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Carles, u ‘kidder’! LOLZ etc. Bro, yr web log ‘rules’ the blogosphere. On the web u r a ‘culturally relevant’ voice [of a generation]/’global brand’ but irl u r ‘just one of billions’/voiceless/small/’fundamentally alone in the universe.’ ‘Offing yrself’/yr web log would be like Superman ‘giving up’ his super powers to be human. ‘Real life’ is but a series of lame memes, bro, and way more inauthentic than web life. Don’t do it.
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quitter, just like Sarah Palin.
Palin / Carles 2012!
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
</3 </3 </3
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so i can’t sleep–figured i’d see what alt things were going on in the world. you know the drill… or not. thanks for leaving me when i need you most, carles.
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dont be lame
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i am sad.
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I’d be extra-extra sad
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alright. yeah.
thanks.
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You can’t leave us without yr round up of the decades bst 100 alt ttracks with links to rapidshare, you shitbird.
YOu hav betrayed yr core demographic, where will I learn the latest abt Am Appy from now on?
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: [
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Dude, after Tofurkey, et.al., what could you expect? You are catering to a false revolution…a generation that will grow up to be capitalist whores like every other human fuck that roams the earth. You let us down on Hipster Hope, and you bring nothing but consumerist ideals into a movement that should be revolutionary, and for that, FUCK YOU, CARLES!
Go Dine on your fucking Snackwells, while I had my Greek Hummus on Thanksgiving….a real feast for about $4….And it was TASTY AS FUCK!
Yea, I know, I get the whole deal, and it sucks. This should be a revolutionary, anarchist movement that could change the world, but instead, young hipsters who don’t question anything make this into a huge joke. Go fuck yourselves, because all you do is contribute to PacSun get half off adds from your email.
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//////////Reply by 4545
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 4:13 am
@walmart suckz,
will I give myself herpes if I suck my own dick via coldsores?
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//////////Reply by Bebe
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 4:23 am
@walmart suckz, follow me on twitter bro
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//////////Reply by shamu
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 5:22 am
@walmart suckz, I could listen to you talk for hours bro. Please educate me. I’m so glad you are about 100% more serious than anyone on this sight, but you still managed to start your post of with “dude” and insult everyone you want to enlist for your rad revolutionary hipster anarchist movement. Cool about the hummus too man, I really respect your authentic revolutionary alt values now that I know about your authentic eating habits. May it be equally pretentious and impressive after digestion.You sound like you are about halfway through 7th grade, drop that anarchy shit and stop taking yourself so seriously.
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//////////Reply by Oscar
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 5:44 am
@shamu, lolz I used tas bes a lil’ anarchy kid when I was in 7th grd. I grew outs of et thos. lawl i tolk strayng rite nao. hoh wels
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//////////Reply by shamu
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 9:07 pm
@Oscar, Me too. Maybe I was too hard on him, took out my altmotions on a middleschooler.
//////////Reply by possum
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 8:13 am
@walmart suckz,
i’m not an anarchist anymore cuz i decided 2 get a degree & “work within tha system” but ur post is srsly a breath of fresh air & i hope ur not being post-post-post-post-post-post-post-post-post-ironic or smthg b/c we need a dose of hardcore 2 make things “real” again
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//////////Reply by yea
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 7:34 pm
@walmart suckz, eww who shops at pacsun…pacsun is for mainstreamers who try and fit into the so called “posers in society”
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luv u. (always)
miss u. (already)
– loyal reader. (lies)
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voy a llorar
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carles! noooo! carles!
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Noooo. <3
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Tonite is gonna bes a good nite.
good good nite.
goodnite HRO.
:’(
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WTF CRLS. WAT IS THIS I DONT EVEN
You had better not quit, i love this blogggggggg
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oh this again
carles stop being shit
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if u do commit internet suicide plz plz plz make a book with the best of hro.
hro was getting weak, but there was some crazy good shit that you wrote, and i want that to be with me 4ever.
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if im really honest, back in 2k8, i remember discovering this blog, and going back on the pages…… reading all the way back to 2k7. how inauthentic i was back then………..
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God is dead and you killed him, Carles.
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will this make my I AM CARLES t more authentic/valueable?
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//////////Reply by melbourne
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 7:29 am
@melbourne, *valuable
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surprised how many ‘bros’ still dont ‘fucking get it’
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//////////Reply by nafnosseb
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 2:18 pm
@jerryseinfelds, well i only started reading after the kanye post. Would you be undermining the “whole effing point” if you just “laid it out”?
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My carlitoes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Please dont stop posting :(
I read this blog everyday.
It is the funniest best!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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so i downloaded this soulwax dvdrip & it asks for a password?
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C-C-C-ya!!!!
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I think he’s doing this b/c 2 many posers started 2 get in 2 the culture w/o knowing what 4. Sry yall I JUST WANTED 2 B COOL
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//////////Reply by John M
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 10:03 am
Hi, this is the person who posted that previous post.
I am 28 years old. I am an undergrad at a religious college in a southern city of 150,000. I wear slightly baggy jeans, button-down poplin shirts under hoodies, and hi-top Reeboks that I got at an Academy Sportswear. I listen to dubstep and Bat for Lashes: I’m not crazy about either, but due to a lack of connections with the alt community I have trouble finding something closer to what I’m looking for.
I used to live in Portland. I briefly lived in a house with a bunch of people who knew the best music and the best style. Sure, they were hipsters, I guess. But at the time I felt they were the hippest among the hip. Their own take on things eschewed the all-black indie rocker bullshit; because their white-trash irony was actually only half-ironic, and because of their sincere interest in hip-hop, they were able to live in a rapidly gentrifying neighborhood without seeming like invaders. I admired this, and wanted always to be a part of it.
I never did fit in especially well, though. I tried too hard, and while some were kind friends to me and protectors, others tired of it. At the same time, rifts arose in the group, and most went their own ways. I moved to the South to finish school.
About a year ago, I noticed a Myspace bulletin from one of these people, with an image linked from HRO. I started checking the site in order to feel connected to this culture that I’d lost. I enjoyed the naïve tone, but I got confused and discouraged by the undercurrent of sadism in posts such as the one about Kanye.
I like Taylor Swift. She seems wholesome. Her music makes me cry. I am tired of partying, probably because I am pushing 30. I am currently working on quitting drinking and switching to a yoga/organic lifestyle more focused on healing than style. For awhile I accepted the premise that unhip people were a waste of time, but now I reject it. I spent much of the last few years in this city dreaming of a time when I’d return to an alt city, and of the music I would play at my parties. The parties here sucked, so I hung out at a small pub playing Rummy. Since then, it seems the culture has finally gone mainstream and has lost its relevance. Once Lady Gaga showed up, you and I both knew it was over. It’s a new decade. Let’s make way for the latest batch of 18-year-olds.
I am a Hipster Runoff reader. I have intruded on an inside joke. Many others have, too. It was inevitable. This is why your blog’s time has come.
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//////////Reply by jolienoire
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 6:13 pm
@John M,
lol, no1 cares.
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//////////Reply by yea
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 7:38 pm
@John M, no1 cares. Part 2
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//////////Reply by John M
//////////Posted November 30th, 2009 at 8:17 pm
THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GET FUCKING VULNERABLE
R u okay?
I’m really worried about you.
Ur making this impossible
R u being serious?!
Ur being serious!?
OH MY GAWD THIS IS IT!!!!!!!!!!
I want to read your blog 4eae, but I understand that you want to ‘get paid.’ Ideally HRO would pay u enuff, but I understand that enuff is nvr enuff. ‘4 walls & Adobe CS for ur gurls’ is a fleeting feeling, but 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 9 or 10 moneys can’t buy you back the love that you had then.
02.04.2k8 – 30.11.2k9
“HIPSTER RUNOFF remixes Radiohead!” to “Should Carles retire?”
“Is This Really What You Want?” by “Jesus Christ.” (the indie band) is the song of decade – SilverKnell
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
Oh my gawd this is it!? ;(
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don’t leave me
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Used to love HRO (circa 2k7)… kind has fallen off recently, but I will definitely miss the alt report… can someone start their own alt report and let me know???
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Carles, pls don’t quit , where am i going to get my mental & emotional support if u leave ? Stay, just stay.
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yo man. its time. this shit aint good no more.
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is this it?
#riphro
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Don’t quit, you utter fool! England needs you, even though we can’t watch half of the viddies you post…sort that out. But don’t quit.
xneverxdiex
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Carles,
why not just post ‘brb’ and post when u feel like it again
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Big Yawn bro, we all know you won’t give up the ad money.
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u had me @hello
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Look forward to reading a post about Tiger Wools in a few hours.
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no efin way! retiring…dude, really? viva la carles :)
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its not like you need to post everday. but quitting entirely is lame.
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After 6 years of sobriety, I am gonna relapse on hornitos and get right with god via electro and tugjobs from kewt azns
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can hro turn into a place where ppl post amateur cumshots/facials/doggystyle vids?
seems sweet
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so many blogyears to go!
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ouch carles, ouch…..feel abandoned, thrown in the ocean, passed to the sea…..
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Crls this blog was amazing. You dont know how much it used to please me. Whether it was your funny insight, or how culturally relevant/on point you used to be back in 2006-2008 [HRO's prime] when there used to be only 40 comments to every post and all the comments were mature people not fucking entry level teens seeing what was cool two years ago. Regardless HRO had a great run. Once the Hornitos ads and the mainstream found out it was all downhill from there. Seeing multiple pictures from you time to time since the summer started also did not help. Whoever published for HRO, you did a great job. Tao was personally my favorite writer on here. He made me LOL to many times. Later
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This is a message from overseas! Keep on blogging, Carles! We need your insight for music and all the shit that goes with it!!
STAY
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ye man, you died with bloghaus. ////// and lots of stylised writing
loved alt nips and altbags, but its over. let the ‘young’ people takeover. i’m ‘old’ now so dont know whats ‘hip’ anymore too.
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Damn. had so many good memories here. like that time I commented. that was dope.
miss u carles. and everything you’ve done for the internets pre 2k10. cultural milestone y’all. u will be missed. i bought ur book. i liked it.
please post again the future, even if in little drips. drop. drip. drop.
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crls i am disapoint
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o GOD NO!
If you do I will kill myself!!! hahaha
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@jimmieofarc, where are we? What the he’ll is going on????
Carles where are we? What the he’ll is going on carles????
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crls, u r amazing.
thanks 4 making me lol so many times this yr
HRO 4EVA. <3
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NO FUCK MIKE DON’T RETIRE
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the new guy sucks! he listens to lameee stuff i never even try and listen to…
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#1 Pearl Jam – Veckatimesty
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i say ride the advertising funds for at least another year
make some “mad bank”
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i fukinghate yu too much…i wouldn’t awnt o be i yor shos. ridete waves bro… sorry tohear the news. site ucks now
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crls, you had a good run. this site was my one guilty pleasure on the net…maybe the new guy will be alright, but idk…i’m probably too old for this site anyway. we all gotta go sometime :\
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it makes sense
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i have nothing left 2 live for.
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miss u//love u//hate u
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Mike you cool man. But i do not like that you put jay z or lady gaga on your list, they both suck so hard.
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whoops posted in the wrong space. Carles i have great respect that you paved the way for bros to come, but the truth is you’re a dinosaur you’re obselete. The age of the altbro is upon us and relics like you do not fit in the new regime.
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d2d2wd2wdf
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you broke my heart carles..
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h8<3miss #whereIsCarles
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Did he died?
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found something via ‘the internet’
thought it might help ‘explain some shit’..
http://i771.photobucket.com/albums/xx358/xalisa666keysx/authenticbros.jpg
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//////////Reply by bm fartz
//////////Posted December 2nd, 2009 at 1:03 am
@bob marls, looks like 1 of charles’ memes actually made it to the big leagues
is it ‘post-ironic’ that pfork would cash in on a meme that was actually making fun of them in the first place (via chillwave)?
or is pfork finally ‘relevant’ again? or are they just ruining ‘this whole browave movement’ for ‘the rest of us’?
postAnCobloghouse killed HRO r.i.p
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Dude. That sucks. You were obviously making bank off the ads on here, what gives? Only blog worth reading, ever. Hope this is a gimmick.
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Yo, Carles. I’m really happy for you, and I’mma let you finish, but Jesus Christ’s Black Friday was one of the best retirements of all time.
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noooo carles, don’t do it! come back!
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yes. if you have to think about it, you’re done.
find something better to do. that’s not an insult, but obviously it’s what you gots to do.
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