I was reading some news story about how Osama Bin Laden has a son named Omar. I was like 'whoa. Osama had time 2 pop out a lil Osama Jr?' But then I remember reading that he had tons of women that he could utilize as human shields, so I'm sure he got to 'bareback' them whenever he wanted 2, resulting in a few kids.

Anways, his son, Omar Bin Laden is trying to be all like, "U didn't kill my father."

I Omar Ossama Binladin and my brothers the lawful children and heirs of the Ossama Binladin (OBL) have noted wide coverage of the news of the death of our father, but we are not convinced on the available evidence in the absence of dead body, photographs, and video evidence that our natural father is dead. Therefore, with this press statement, we seek such conclusive evidence to believe the stories published in relation to 2 May 2011 operation Geronimo as declared by the President of United States Barrack Hussein Obama in his speech that he authorized the said operation and killing of OBL and later confirmed his death.

If OBL has been killed in that operation as President of United States has claimed then we are just in questioning as per media reports that why an unarmed man was not arrested and tried in a court of law so that truth is revealed to the people of the world. If he has been summarily executed then, we question the propriety of such assassination where not only international law has been blatantly violated but USA has set a very different example whereby right to have a fair trial, and presumption of innocence until proven guilty by a court of law has been sacrificed on which western society is built and is standing when a trial of OBL was possible for any wrongdoing as that of Iraqi President Sadam Hussein and Serbian President Slobodan Miloševic'. We maintain that arbitrary killing is not a solution to political problems and crime's adjudication as Justice must be seen to be done.

Listen, Omar. We killed ur dad. I'm sorry abt that. Even though he chose a life of terror, living on the run instead of raising u. Taking you to youth soccer games. Helping you with relationship issues. Making sure you stayed on top of your AP Calculus homework. As an American, I can guarantee that we shot ur dad in the head 2x... Then we let his body vibe out at sea.

Omar... I hope ur okay... 4 real...
U seem chill [via dreadlocks]...
But more importantly...
R u alt?
R u an Arab alt?
What's ur personal brand all about?
Those are some pretty intense Matrix-wave/Battlefield Earth wave dreadlocks.
Vibing out in some black leather [via the Jousteeces]

I wonder what his existence is all about.
Do u think he can 'beat off' in peace, or are international intelligence agencies always tracking him, wondering if his dad will contact him?

I wonder if there was a Daniel Plainview moment [via There Will Be Blood] where Osama Bin Laden had 2 'abandon his son' bc he thought his life's mission was more important. Now his whole identity is probably about 'outdoing' his father, but he probably can't because every1 is watching him. More than likely, he probably just wants to chill out and be a little bit more American.

Omar probably developed an alternative point-of-view to help him deal with his father being so absent in his life. He had to resort to 'consumerism' 2 buy his needs with terrorist-network money that his dad left in his bank account to buy Calvin Klein t-shirts and go on 'sick benders' in Qatar.

I have a hard time really judging 'Third World Alts' unless there is a VICE or New York Times trend piece about them. To me, this lil red had seems pretty 'alt', but for all I know, this is a mainstream fashion in the Arab world.

I can't tell if he is riding this horse to 'go green' and preserve alt environmental ideals, or if Arab ppl just srsly ride horses and carry around swords and 'go on crusades', trying to kill ppl and chop their heads off. I know I sound really naive and American, but I just want 2 know 'what makes an Arab alt'?

Arab Alt = American mainstreamer?

Srsly though... Are 'alt Arabs' just the dudes who look like they wear leather, smell like heavy cologne, and look like bros who 'hit the club hard' and buy prostitutes?

Or is there some sort of underground-underground alt living in the Arab / Muslim world that we don't know abt bc they aren't allowed on twitter?
Can u be 'alternative' in the Eastern World?
Without 'American ideas', can u form any sort of relevant iteration of 'alternative' and apply it 2 ur personal brand?
Do u believe Osama Bin Laden is still alive?
Do u think Osama is hiding in Omar's body?
Can Omar Bin Laden ever 'deal with the pain' of losing his father (not just via assassination, but via his life)? Will Omar ever be able 2 build his own personal brand instead of just being 'Osama's son'?