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Alexis Krauss shows off her BANGIN BOD in GQ Magazine. She truly is 'Sexi Lexi.' (15 comments) |
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I Am Carles Returns with LIMITED EDISH VALENTINE'S DAY shirt. (8 comments) |
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Bon Iver sounds like dying indie rock on SNL, has mysterious HUGE black teenager in backing band (30 comments) |
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Pitchfork cyberbullies & slutshames Best Coast, calls her an 'inauthentic two-timing sell out panderer' (13 comments) |
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Tyler the Creator spotted bronoodling with 'this nigga' Kanye West. Are Big Thangs Poppin? (10 comments) |
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Lana Del Rey sells MAD albums, is officially RICH, FAMOUS, and SUCCESSFUL (12 comments) |
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LANAMANIA hits Los Angeles, frenzied fans begin sobbing in Lana Del Rey's presence (35 comments) |
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GRAPHIC PHOTO: Cults lead singer Brian Oblivion suffers severe 3rd degree burns to face (4 comments) |
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Introducing PRAYER WATCH 2K12 A CandleLight Vigil 4 Carles #pray4carles (24 comments) |
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"BUZZ BANDS" was a category on Jeopardy. Have BUZZ BANDS crossed over 2 the mnstrm? (14 comments) |
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Was M.I.A.'s Super Bowl flip off the first shameless slutwave marketing act in the post-LDR era? (27 comments) |
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Skrillex spotted bronoodling with nostalgic human meme Mr. Belding in relevant VIP section (4 comments) |
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Vampire Weekend was the HUGE indie winner of the Super Bowl commercial war (6 comments) |
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Lana Del Rey wears baseball cap, looks TOTALLY EFFING keut (7 comments) |
Chillwave is a new and exciting genre that existed in 2k9, but now it is kinda dormant, and we are waiting to see how chillwave clashes with 'the big guns' of indie in 2k11. Gonna be a 'huge showdown', and there will be casualties. No1 knows what is going to happen.
So even though ur super relevant and ovr chillwave, there is an entire genre of humans who are still discovering it. They are like 'wow, these vibes are so amazing, have yall heard of this shit?' Glad facebook exists so we can discover these vibes.
Check out these laggard chillwavers vibing out on facebook
First some bro embeds the hit mp3 by Washed out "Feel it All Around." He is like, "Have yall heard of this band, they are called Washed Out. For some reason they remind me of Panda Bears.... I could rlly use some Neon Indians, yall!"
Then he comes right back and embeds another video. No idea wtf he embedded, but was probably something hella lame/hella chill.
Then some bro is like "Listen fggtzz, we call this lofi electro. U should check out Toro Y Moi. I'm the shit. Yall blow."
Another bro is like "Have yall heard of the Small Black? Heard they are chillwave, yall. Love buzzbands"
Then an EPIC BRO comes along for a chill moment, and is like "THEY CALL THIS SHIT CHILLWAVE BITCHES! PEACE I'M OUTTIE EFFING LAMESTREAMERS. SEE YALL IN HELLLLLL. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I'M THE SHIT. RIDING CHILLWAVES WITH MY BROS. EFF EVERY1. GONNA DEACTIVATE FACEBOOK AND START CHILLBOOK. L8RS.'
********
Is chillwave 'dead'?
Will chillwave live on 4evr?
R u excited for indie vs chillwave in 2k11?
Who is ur fave chillwave band/the band most likely 2 'live 4evr'?
Do u talk abt buzzbands/relevant genres on facebook?
Will lamestreamers ever talk about rape gaze on facebook?
Submit ur lamestreamer sightings utilizing the ALT REPORT TIPS SUBMISSION FORM.
Comments
fuck
fuck
i know right? why is this not
i know right? why is this not drug musik???
they call it
they call it 'chillwave'
...
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Just who is this mysterious
Just who is this mysterious 'they'?
2nd again? totes lame
2nd again? totes lame
3rd
3rd
first? nahh
first? nahh
read the whole article 'like
read the whole article 'like a bitch' then didn't realize there were 0 cmnts until i was done. h8 myself
sorry, bro. maybe next time.
sorry, bro. maybe next time. learn from your mistakes.
he's right, man. "it gets
he's right, man. "it gets better"
lolz
lolz
the guy who said its
the guy who said its chillwavve is also the guy findin out about ittss. Come on carles....this is gettin stupid goin 2 watch RUNAWAY again....
Love that movie, it's hella
Love that movie, it's hella chill when Julia Roberts finally gets married at the end.
Chillwave is def still alive
Chillwave is def still alive man.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHKCw3dJhqA
ppl on my FB newsfeed always
ppl on my FB newsfeed always post "riding the chillwave".
probably too self-conscious
probably too self-conscious to write "vibin to some rapegaze."
lol'd... caught me off guard
lol'd... caught me off guard there.
i had to change my name to
i had to change my name to bro namath, because i was the first brononymous and now he/she is a fool who just tries to be all 'firsties' on every effing post
brononymous is the automatic
brononymous is the automatic tag you hag!
Do you think chillwaveers luv
Do you think chillwaveers luv 2 wave kinda chill-like? wut about the double-handed pedophile wavve? How do u think Wavves feels abt all this wave biznass?
r u an effing retard
r u an effing retard
are you an autistic vegan?
are you an autistic vegan?
autistic vegans can still
autistic vegans can still rape ppl (via rapegaze). everyone on the internet is out to rape everybody.
ru a cheese beast?
ru a cheese beast?
I'm glad you've made it
I'm glad you've made it possible for us to submit these sightings of unfortunate souls
Feel like this meme has
Feel like this meme has slowly transitioned from 'making fun of lamestreamers' into 'making fun of people who make fun of lamestreamers'. V. impressed with Carles' meme evolution.
Pretty sure it's always been
Pretty sure it's always been that way.
Done w/chillwave.
Done w/chillwave. #groovytunes is all I care about anymore.
Stoked carles is meme'n 4 the
Stoked carles is meme'n 4 the future via chillwave vs Indie 2k11. I get worried that this shit will just stop or change b taken over by these so called effin lamestreamers like brononymous, mollom, ads, and new page layouts. Excited for whats to come. Thanks carles for makin my life meaningfulcore.
Hipster Runoff Blog Radio
Hipster Runoff Blog Radio Sirius XMU 10/25/10
Twin Shadow - Forget
Whitest Boy Alive - Golden Cage (Fred Falke Remix)
Washed Out - Feel It All Around
Twin Sister - The Other Side Of Your Face (said Twin Shadow on the Sirius Internet Radio player)
Small Black - Photojournalist
Deerhunter - Helicopter
Phoenix - Lisztomania
Chromeo - Don't Walk Away
Avalanches - Since I Left You
Beach House - Take Care
Fleet Foxes - Blue Ridge Mountains
Sufjan Stevens - Casimir Pulaski Day
Houses - Soak it Up
Palmbomen - Moon Children
Les Sins - Lina
Ariel Pink - For Kate I Wait
Waskerley Way - Cat Alert
Kings Of Convenience - Cayman Islands
Vampire Weekend - M79
Junior Senior - Headphone Song
Grizzly Bear - Two Weeks
Freelance Whales - Generator Second Floor
Cut Copy - Strangers In The Wind
Interpol - Untitled
Starting out with Twin Shadow again then right into that super gay Whitest Boy Alive track that he plays all the freaking time. A lot more "old" tracks than new tracks this week. Carles is always so chill. I wonder if he ever rocks out when he is alone or if he just listens to cheesy dance pop all the time.
faps to bebe while listening
faps to bebe while listening to dance pop
Amazon.com/Itunes need a
Amazon.com/Itunes need a chill wave collection
want them to tell me what i "might like"
feel kinda bad for entry-lvl alts that "get" chill wave but dont "get" it yet (via mnstrm ads)
want to share our authentic experience with everyone
be apart of something bigger than myself
be apart of something bzzwrthy
i have warned you
i have warned you all
lamestreamers are evolving
finding 'our' music via google/bing.com
listening 2 it
even enjoying it
we must stop the lamestream encroachment
we must migrate from facebook
to an alt-er domain (name)
an 'altered zone' [via p4k + gvb branding strategy]
we must preserve indie
from the effing lamestreamers
'PEACE I'M OUTTIE'
^ this is correct.
^ this is correct.
Feel you bro, there should be
Feel you bro, there should be an altbook.
Don't worry, bro.
Don't worry, bro. Lamestreamers only hear about buzzworthy bands via indy movie soundtracks and car commercials.
Clearly indy movies stopped being relevant in the early 2ks so that's one avenue blocked. That leaves adz, and ever since Apple stopped needing to advertise anything to sell 10 million units, lamestreamers cant hear the Ting Tings before us.
We'll always be at least a week ahead, bro.
You bro's are a bunch of
You bro's are a bunch of f**ing laughably pretentious retards.
Pretty lame of you to "call
Pretty lame of you to "call us out" [via the internets]. And to censor your curse. Must be very accustom to EMTEEVEE
be nice bro we just want
be nice bro we just want understanding <3
Ridin' stresswavez yall. H8
Ridin' stresswavez yall. H8 lamestreamers. Now they're gonna run up on their bro friendz and be super 'authentic'. H8 life.
This combination of Lamebook
This combination of Lamebook and The Alt Report should be 100% of Alt Report posts.
H8 lamestreamers!!!!
H8 lamestreamers!!!!
EPIC BRO totes 'crushed it'
EPIC BRO totes 'crushed it' w/ his comment.
luv u EB. epic-alt
jesus
jesus
first
first
doesnt matter how many ppl
doesnt matter how many ppl start listening to chillwave. nickleback and miley cyrus will rule the airwaves and tour in their cyborg bodies all across the galaxy and making loads of bank in the future. chillwave needs some healthy amount of people to keep them afloat before they turn thrity and get a job in real estate.
good to see someone bringing
good to see someone bringing this up. it is nice to be able to support yourself as a musician.
lamestreamer
lamestreamer sightings?
*sigh*
that was prob. the most
that was prob. the most obnoxious facebook conversation yet. even though their musical knowledge is 'more advanced' than an MGMT bro, it was like entry level one-upmanship being felt all around.
like the bro saying 'its lofi electro like toro y moi. like who the eff asked you, bro?
It was a private conversation
It was a private conversation which was aired publicly, so I think it was probably between those friends, bro. That bro was probs rejecting "chiillwavvvess" and redefining it under a more relevant genre(s). Also, bro, what the f*** do you know?
i <3 these posts most. i
i <3 these posts most. i actually post lamestream things on my faisey in hopes of gettin on this site...
Do u <3 Epic Bro? Do u think
Do u <3 Epic Bro?
Do u think Epic Bro's thoughts/comments may be short-sighted?
Or is Epic Bro ahead of space/time?
Is Epic Bro now Post-Rape Gaze?
Should Epic Bro be with Zooey DeSchanel or Alice Glass?
I wish I could talk about
I wish I could talk about relevant buzzbands on fb, instead of hearing about babies/someone got wasted/look what huffington post said/etc.
fb makes me sad. fb friends != BFFs. H8 FB. Srsly want 'Chillbook'.
totes feel u on dis bro. Fb
totes feel u on dis bro.
Fb friends < OR =< chll/alt frnds.
feels like nd 2 find chll/indy ntrylvlrs qt
Around The World [via ex-Darlin'] n nurture 'em
w/ 'authentic' vibe
2 b ahead of effing lmstrmrs 4 > 1week
2 discover *-wave / *-gaze / post-*-gaze 2gthr
2 tk acid 2gthr n mbrace '2k11 face-off : indie v post-rape-gaze / post-witch-hse'
Feels like thr shud b:
Altspce
Altbook/Chillbook
Alt-Finder
H8 lmstrmrs
H8 life n 2k10
totes feel u on dis like.
totes feel u on dis like. srsly bro.
Fb friends < OR =< chll/alt frnds.
feels like nd 2 find chll/indy ntrylvlrs qt
Around The World [via ex-Darlin'] n nurture 'em
w/ 'authentic' vibe
2 b ahead of effing lmstrmrs 4 > 1week
2 discover *-wave / *-gaze / post-*-gaze 2gthr
2 tk acid 2gthr n mbrace '2k11 face-off : indie v post-rape-gaze / post-witch-hse'
Feels like thr shud b 4 2k11:
Altspce
Altbook/Chillbook
Alt-Finder
H8 lmstrmrs
H8 life n 2k10
Well word has it that
Well word has it that MomCore-Veteran Adult-Goth Sensation RoBBy Smiths just 'EFFING CRUSHED IT' on a Crystal Castle joint. Now all the moms/dads/bros/sisters of bros on FB are going to be like 'Bobbie smith just tore the rim off 2k10, hey Alt-Bro want to talk about ChillGaze". Then u can flat out pull an EPIC BRO on them.
yepyep!
yepyep!
soooo effing tired of
soooo effing tired of chillwave yall. it was good for a bit but it's become derivative as fuck now. just let it die already.
I couldn't understand what
I couldn't understand what they were saying, but then the ALTBOT translated it into brospeak for me. Thank you ALTBOT, thank you.
uhhhhhhh........isn't Epic
uhhhhhhh........isn't Epic Bro the same clueless lamestream bro who started this conversation?
remember the 1st time I heard
remember the 1st time I heard chillwave y'all back in Q2 of 2k9
felt like all was right in teh world
1.5 yrs later some lamestreamers are now into riding the chillwaves
feel like 1.5 yrs is a pretty typical turnaround time for alt to lamestream in this post-post-modern world y'all
maybe we should embrace it?
but there's nothing good to
but there's nothing good to listen to anymore.
i mean dubstep have been lamestream since like last year so we are lost. we need an indie messiah
worst
worst
time to dlete my
time to dlete my chillwave
ohwait i already did when best coast came (late)
over? yea right just getting
over? yea right just getting started.
http://johnblaze.bandcamp.com/track/re-chillwaves
yo blaze. riding yr
yo blaze. riding yr chillwaves. feeling transcendent. thanks.
thank you kumquat. all are
thank you kumquat.
all are welcome to ride the waves of transcendence.
Chillwave just kind of sounds
Chillwave just kind of sounds like cheap Boards of Canada with bad singing to me.
boards of canada wasn't
boards of canada wasn't produced under any pretense of being relevant/informed of what is going on. chillwave is produced with a strong consideration for how it will perceived, an intentional mix of uniformity and originality. BOC is music for music.
i wrote about this on the post about Wavves.
Omg 2k11 face-off hs started
Omg 2k11 face-off hs started (via @GREGORY)
Is chillwave a 'bad indie' ?
Will indie 'owns' chillwavves in 2k11?
Will keut ntrylvlrs in 2k11 'digs' Boards Of Canada?
Or will 2k11 see more of 'indie v mnstrm indie' instead? (via ArFi v LeonKings)
Will th FollowilBros fight ArFi onstage instead of thmslvs in 2k11?
can't wait to finish exams on
can't wait to finish exams on friday and ride some harrrd chillwaves. fridaywave.
if the prez wears dad jeans n
if the prez wears dad jeans n he is the voice of our gen i think the big ? is are dad jeans the new fash of chillwavers?
Digging chillwave! Young Man
Digging chillwave! Young Man is my fav artist right now...
Check out Young Man’s live performance of his song “Five” here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1C-68asYBVU&feature=player_embedded
iTunes link to purchase BOY: http://bit.ly/9NDbnq
Lamestreamers are funny [via
Lamestreamers are funny [via them not having an effing clue]
listening to toro y moi is
listening to toro y moi is like vibing out to a vacuum cleaner, also i like to play Lissoms when i copy large amounts of files from folder to folder on windows 7. this is my first ppost on hipster runnoffl,
you obviously studied up
you obviously studied up beforehand
"They say it's
"They say it's chillwave"
That's my favorite part
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