Hi
I'm the lead singer / guitarist / manager of a buzzband that you've never heard of.
We really want to expose you to our music.
We figured that if we make a compelling music video, you might stick around for our entire song.
By the end of the song, yall will be like "This song is awesome. This band is awesome."

What keeps people's attention?
Sex, violence, and free food.
Unfortunately, we can't order you pizza to get u to listen to our music
And violence is scary
So we'll go with sex.

How abt if we have a woman strip naked and 'make love' / 'have sex' with a guitar
She can strip naked, show off her firm body
hard nipples
beef curtains
and we will keep ur attention


Did you like our guitar rock?
It was bad ass, right?
oh, you put it on mute, and just pleasured urself?
U didn't like our mp3?
It was too honky?

That's chill. Did u at least 'rub 1 out'?
Well, at least we got your attention, right?
U remember our band's name, right? U gonna come out to our show?
Oh, that's chill, ur gonna stay home and watch internet porn.

Guess we were a little bit naive to think that this 'art piece' could compete
with premium online adult content
So many niches, u can see any1 do anything
I guess ur right, this guitar thing was certainly an 'entry level fetish'

Feeling sad
Maybe our buzzband will never break thru
Just wanted to get ur attention with a sexual meme
We wanted u as a fan 4 life
but instead, u just ejaculated in abt 2 minutes
and moved on to the next internet meme

Are 'sexually-charged' videos innovative?
Did u 'get off' to this video? Did u 'cum'?
Did the 'crappy guitar rock' kill the vibes of ur 'hard-on'?
Did this broad have 'the perfect alternative breasts'?
Do u think she has a 'legit career' as a model, or as a soft core wave adult entertainment star?
Have u ever had sex with a guitar?
Did it 'get u off'?
Do u ever feel like ur having sex when u listen 2 music?