Lana Del Rey EFFING TANKS on SNL. Is her career 'effing over'?
Even the most entry-level buzz market analyst knew that Lana Del Rey would COMPLETELY tank on Saturday Night Live. It happened right before our eyes like a trainwreck, except that the train was carrying tons of port-a-potties, and then everything got covered in poo-poo and they had to shut down an entire small town because of the toxic smelliness of the poo fumes, and then every1 got on twitter to say 'OMG THERE'S SO MUCH POO AND IT SMELLS SO BAD! EWIE MCGOOEY!' What was supposed to be Lana Del Rey’s introduction to Middle America turned into a nightmare, with even the lamest of lamestreamers turning to their social media network of choice to say, “Who be dis bitch, yall? She can’t sing 4 shit.” This has already been the perception of many critics, blogspots, and content farms who resent her rise to internet fame.
Where were u when Lana Del Rey tanked on SNL? It's a moment we'll never forget.
Although 'Video Games' was the song that garnered the most per capita adjusted 4 inflation buzz, the song is a 'complete dud' live. She has had many opportunities to 'fix' her live show, which leaves us asking, begging, pleading, "Why Lana? Why?"
At least she looked good, bb!
There have been rumblings that the entire team associated with the current Lana Del Rey launch will be fired. Even at her first performance at Glasslands Gallery in Brooklyn where she was secretly billed as the Queen of Coney Island, she had a band that was intended to hide in the shadows [link]. There was already a disconnect between the universally projected image of LDR and her branded output. It never came together, and every1 must have been convinced that foreign press and TV appearances meant that 'everything was okay.'
This is LDR's fault.
This is not LDR's fault.
"Blue Jeans" was just good enough to be forgettable, but still sorta 'effing terrible.'
Lana Del Rey’s voice has been widely accepted as a gimmick, but her and her team never took the time to decide how it should be utilized when she was singing live. Obviously, she would have to turn down her wacky vocalisms, and learn how to gesticulate like that Florence + the Machine broad in order to make herself a viable product. Unfortunately, they just put her in a pretty dress, and figured every1 would all be like 'what a sweetheart, yall', but then they forgot that every1 just wants to h8 everything, especially when it looks like ur not trying, and u don't care.
Heads will be rolling this week on #TeamLDR....
What did u think of her performance?
Did LDR tank as hard as u thought she would?
How can Lana Del Rey save her career?
Is there too much negative buzz?
Was she 'not ready yet'?
Who is 2 blame?
Did we build her up just to 'tear her down'?
Did we 'buzz her up' just 2 'hate buzz her down'?
Is she indie's 'biggest failure of all time'?
Did she 'disgrace' the SNL stage/waste the time of Middle Americans?
Is she 'the Rebecca Black of indie'?
I guess Lana Del Rey was right... U and I... We were born 2 die...