HIPSTER RUNOFF

PHOTOSET BY TIMEOUT NEW YORK

I have always wondered what it would be like to have a high-level alt job. Most days, I sit in my cubicle at my lamestream job in a business park, dreaming of what it would be like to have a COVETED job within the meaningful workspaces of one of the most important content farms ever created. I want to be able to be backstage in the VIP area of a relevant music-based event, and be able to say, "I write for Pitchfork. Ever heard of it?" Immediately, a hoard of PR agents and bloggers will do their best to 'get on my good side' because I am an influencer who can MAKE or BREAK their ultimately mediocre band's album. Girls will basically ess my dee, just based on my relevant alt job.

I feel happy to finally know what it looks like inside the walls of Pitchfork's Brooklyn offices.

Pitchfork.com was launched in 1996 by Ryan Schreiber when he had just graduated from high school and was working at a record store; these days, a rave review on the site can practically guarantee a band’s success. But while most would assume the atmosphere at the indie music bible is self-important and smug, it’s actually laid-back and celebratory. In 2005, the small company (made up of 30 employees in its Chicago and Brooklyn offices) curated its first music festival in Chicago and the following year branched out with its annual weekend-long Pitchfork Music Festival. Two years later, the company opened a Manhattan office, and a year after that came a second location—a two-floor loft in Greenpoint that’s just off the BQE. The casual vibe here is intentional, explains Schreiber, who sits among his local staff of about 15 . He favors “[constant] discussion about the music [everyone’s] into,” made easier with a massive, Pitchfork-exclusive server of unreleased tunes.

It seems like they are 'anti-cubicle' so that every1 has their own meaningful workspace. Every1 is vibing on laptops, no Dell desktop computers for these writers and content creators. U have 2 be able 2 create content ON-THE-GO.

Schreibro should definitely have a workstation 'in the back' so that every1 feels scared that he will see them wasting time on the net, and get back 2 work.

I need 2 work in a place where every1 listens 2 great music. My lamestream coworkers have THE RADIO playing all day on our city's worst rock and/or soft rock station. I h8 feeling like I'm at a dentist's office. I need an authentic vinyl-playing machine.

White boards are an authentic way 2 communicate and manage relevant projects. My company recently invested in multi-million dollar project & financial management software. If only they realized that we could get the majority of our work done 'within the cloud' using Google Docs, dropbox, and other web-based services that could really cut down on our overhead. At the end of the day, COMMUNICATION and ENGAGEMENT create a successful business.

The only person with dual monitors in my office is the guy who is programming our new Blackberry app.

Just want a place with kewl posters on the wall. I don't need 2 show off my irrelevant diploma/GED printed-out certificate.

The Pitchfork team occasionally hosts gigs and parties in its office, including two alcohol-brand-sponsored bashes shot for Pitchfork.tv last year featuring performances by Beach Fossils and Dom. “We clear out the space and kind of turn it into a venue,” says Schreiber.

I feel sad
Knowing that
My office space
could not be converted into a relevant venue

“It’s nice to have it not be completely quiet all the time,” says Fluck of Pitchfork’s chatty, play-tunes-at-your-desk atmosphere. “I’ve found that to be an eerie thing at other jobs, when you walk in and everyone [has] headphones [on].”

It seems like they still have a collection of relevant CDs from yesteryear within their offices, or maybe a relevant interior designer altered their zonespace bc digital tactile waste is 'hot' in the design-o-sphere [via mini-disc players]

This bro seems chill, like a bro who I could really stormbrain with, and bounce mad ideas off. I could truly be myself in our meetings, and we could forge the future of sponsored content, without compromising any of the brands involved.

This binder makes me sad bc it reminds me of my job. I want to work in a PDF-file based office.

It would be great to work for a relevant alternative media company one day. People on the internet reading my words. Watching my content. Being INFLUENCED by the influencer that is me. I could send my parents links to my content, and they can finally feel justified in my decision to major in English instead of Business. Pitchfork looks like heaven, and I dream of the day when I can change my 'employment info' on Facebook 2 state that I work somewhere relevant. Ppl will ask me what I do, and my response will cover topics including content creation, writing, video-scaping, brand management, advertiser relations mgmt, and VIP area quality control.

One day I will land my alt dream job.
I am smart, creative, and I have a passion for the arts AND the alts.
This is not just 'a job', this is my lifestyle.

What is the most alt company 2 work 4?
Does p4k seem like a chill place 2 work, or is Ryan Schreiber the slave driver of content farmers?
Do u dig their 'space' or should they do more to make their employees 'feel trapped' in their jobs?
What is ur workspace like?
What is ur alt dream job?

PREVIOUSLY
I want to be self-employed and work in a conceptual work space / modern cubicle.

NYTimes writes article abt how worthless 20-somethings can’t get jobs & try 2 stay young 4evr

My job/career does not align with my true personal brand. [Generation Y and the mainstream workplace]

Photos via design milk

One day, I will break free from my job in corporate America. Working in my cubicle all day, relying on a larger corporation to pay me every month so that I can survive. I work in a generic office building, one that you drive by every day, but you don't really understand what exactly has to happen for the business to survive. I work in one of many departments, feeling like a 'brick in the wall' with a bunch of other people who are in the same pay-bracket as me.

So many employers don't understand how architecture can change the way that they do business. Positive community space can enable workers to bond, work, thrive, and build peer-2-peer sharing networks of business information and intelligence.

H8 being stuck in my cubicle all day. Feel sad that all I can dream of is 'getting my own office' one day, but even that is just a bigger cubicle.

What I really want
is 2 break free
from a company employing me
and to break out of my cubicle

My dream is to be self-employed
living the American Dream
doing my work
in a progressive space
that enables me to make millions of dollars.

I want to be self-employed and work in a conceptual work space / modern cubicle that integrates itself into the space in my regional community.

I want a window that overlooks my backyard. Watch my children grow. Monitoring the dog, making sure he doesn't 'dig up the flowers.'

Might build a spherical pod that can roll around, move it into a public park on a beautiful day. If there is a flood, I will just 'float on' kinda like that Modest Mouse song.

Being self-employed is the American Dream
Having a portal where u can sit in front of a computer
and make money
may or may not be the modern version of the American Dream

Maybe I can start an mp3 music streaming service
a blog website
a music reviews zine
the next facebook
a microblogging community
a meme blog about hipster sea monkeys
The possibilities are endless
as long as I have
the right space to work in

A pod that represents 'the future'
like a space pod
that could feasibly exist in outerspace
looking out the window at Earth
floating above all
transcending all companies.

I want a Lincoln Log cabin. A modern take on an old ideal space. A place where 'shit can get done.'

I want a space that enables me to write a modern version of the Gettysburg Address
Perhaps a meme blog called 'The Williamsburg Address' that makes fun of hipsters
who live in the Williamsburg area of New York / Virginia

My company will be strong, progressive, small.
A tight nit family of workers who truly share ideas to create a better world.
Handling conference calls, browsing the internet, making deals, selling goods + one-of-a-kind services
on the internet.

Space can really change your workplace
Inspire your employers
Help you to stay connected with the world
in order to make positive changes in our ever-changing societal world

What is the American Dream?
What is ur work space like? Does it depress u?
Do u believe more companies should make 'kewler' spaces to inspire workers?
If you could build a work space, what would it look like?
Is life just a series of cubicles?

Animal Collective
#1 band in the world
taking the brand 2 new heights
shitting on competition
branding art 4 art's sake

More than just a picture of strawberry jam on an album cover

for 1 night
authentic fans
swimming in metaphorical strawberry jam
I could touch it
I was swimming in it

Animal Collective Presents Transverse Temporal Gyrus
With the help of their art bro Danny Perez

The Guggenheim: For One Night Only
The Guggenheim: This is Our House, Bitches
The Guggenheim: You're Property of the Mother Fucking Bang Bus--AnCo Style

A downward spiral of altdom in the Googleheim

Photos by Hippies Are Dead

In the middle is authenticity
a portal to the centre of the Earth

Dave Portner aka Avey Tare aka Avatar getting ready for this show
sort of like Jay Z gets ready to play Madison Square Garden
sort of like Alex Rodriguez gets ready to play Yankee Stadium
This is his home. His Time 2 Shine

Photos by rezflicks

Getting an old bro, Deakin 'back'

Really felt like an AnCo show, but better. Familiar technology. Lights. Button pressing.

Visuals 'stunning' me. Taking me to a different place

Lights projecting, utilizing space, altering space.
This is art, architecture, and design. This is life.

Conceptual Icicles

Powered by modern technology

The Largest assembly of relevant alts in attendance

For one night, the Guggenheim was transformed into the most relevant space in the history of the world. Time + space created a portal of energy that looked like the Merriweather Post Pavvy cover.
I was there the night that indie rock changed.
The night we finally accepted that we wanted bands to be more than four white people playing music on a stage at a relevant club
We want them to take us on a journey
as artists and humans

Some bands will come along for the journey
Other bands will swirl down the metaphorical shitter
and be forgotten like yesterday's turd

No photography allowed
This experience can only be experienced
if ur here

but my duty as a blogger
as an alt internet user
as a human with a dig cam
is to take these memories with me
and give them to you.

Artistic branding
differentiating your product
while helping people to connect with it
making every1 in suburbia yearn 2 be a part of it

AnCo
shattering pre-existing norms
of what we want a band 2 be
5 senses taken 2 the next level

$25 admission fee
bros in costumes standing around for 6 hours
While relevant alternative ppl 'partied' at cash bars
feeling relevant
lights, sounds, life
Was it worth it?

********
Is the Animal Collective brand stronger than ever?
Did this show look 'sweet' or like an entry level first year art student's end-of-the-term project?
Was this show a 'success'?
Is 'art' bullshit?
Will Animal Collective's strong links to drug culture prevent them from 'crossing over'?
Is Danny Perez a 'genius' or does Animal Collective need to start collaborating with other art bros?
Will ODDSAC win an Oscar?
Will the Guggenheim performance win a Grammy?
Could Panda Bear win American Idol?

Photo by the StyleShark

Yesterday, I used my Palestinian scarf for something functional. I was attending a large outdoor concert, and I had to urinate. I had to walk to the edge of the property in order to use the portable restrooms that were provided by the festival promoters. As I approached 'the facilities,' I could smell something 'sterile' but also something 'incredibly disgusting.' As if I was standing on the sidelines of a battle between the pungent smell of poo and the cleaning agents that people poo and pee into within portapotties. I covered my nose and mouth with my alternative scarf, as if I was 'actually in the Middle East', and there was a 'massive sandstorm'/fire fight with American troops.

I walked into the portable restroom, and I saw a urinal to the left which had a pipe connecting to the large pool of waste below the toilet seat. I peered down the toilet seat and saw a mountain of feces with a blue tint, matching the royal, synthetic colour of the simulated toilet water. I attempted to hold my breath, but my body's natural desire for air caused me to take in an intense 'whiff' of the excrement of several hundred people. For a moment, I felt like I wanted to vomit, but then I realized that there was beauty in this metabolic breakdown of your body's essential needs. Found beauty in the fact that while I usually 'see people eating' and bond with humanity while sharing feasts...for once I was able to share with 'what comes out of humans.' As if I realized that eating was just a means to this end--pooping.

I looked down at the huge pile of shit stewed with urine, and admired it. For the first time in my life, I felt 'not alone.' I feel like I truly understood that maybe we're all the same. We all eat, we all feel like children, and we all have to poop. A warm smile came over me, as I decided to 'drop a few pieces of love' on top of this pile of humanity. The logs creamed out of my ass hole, as if God had opened up a trendy frozen yogurt shop--no wiping necessary--a clean breakoff executed by my contracting anus. I got up, and saw my two distinct logs piled on top of the blueish brown mound of feces. I paused for a moment, then watched the blue water creep up and tint my defecation. I felt like I was a part of something bigger than myself.

I had a little bit more to urinate, so I decided to move around a used-tampon utilizing the force of my urine stream. It floated around somewhat aimlessly until it settled within the mound of feces. It was as if it found its home. It was as if I found my home. I zipped up my pants, took one last look at 'authentic beauty' and exited the portapotty, most likely never to come back again. It made me happy and sad at the same time--much like 90% of life's most meaningful experiences.

On the way home, I saw some portable toilets being transported to what I could only assume was a large music or cultural festival.

It made me feel a little bit better about life. I hoped that some1 else was able to find the beauty that I found when I shared a unique experience with hundreds of people inside of a portable restroom unit.

Sometimes, it seems like ur looking for beauty in all of the wrong places.

'There's no such thing as home.'
- Zacharias Braff, The Garden State of Friendship movie film

This is the story of how Carles gave up his prestigious position at a leading architecture firm and eventually ended up living in this temporary cardboard structure attached to a wall in the subway. A story about giving up everything 2 find urself.

Photo via Ivan Rodic

I went away to the city. After I finished the 5 year architecture program at Rhode Island Institute of Design, I got a job with one of the most prestigious architecture firms in the world. They were known for their innovation, 'kewl looking buildings' and sometimes downright zany/dangerous design decisions. I was the understudy to one of the most respected architects in the world, and he really taught me a lot--how to challenge norms and how 2 transcend society. How 2 value public space and how not 2 care about material things. He taught me about how to use the Adobe Creative Suite, as well as how to use 'actual Adobe' to create a shelter. The truth is, when u architectify a beautiful building, it doesn't need to stand out--it needs to be functional and cheap. This is the beauty behind architecture.

After I 'matured' into a true designer, I resigned from my position, and decided to go to a suburban construction company who designed 'shitty buildings' that people take for granted. I made a lot of structures that I was very proud of. I did not make as much money as I could of, nor did I design museums or investment banking facilities, but I was truly happie.

Here is a strip mall that I designed.

I redesigned the space within 24% of Subways in the USA

I designed a space in which Chicken and Tacos could be served.

Here is a concept Chinese restaurant that I embedded within a now defunct mall.

I even revolutionized the storage industry by inventing something called 'Portable On Demand Storage' (PODS), where people can put all of their shit in a huge box.

As you can see, I designed things that real people use on a daily basis. It was as if I had 'mastered' architecture, and there was nothing else to achieve. I felt like I was on top of the world, much like after most architects build their 'master building.' I was truly on top of my game.

This was when I decided to challenge norms for the rest of my own life.

I created a temporary structure within the local subway system. It was made out of cardboard and duct tape. The purpose of this structure is to promote 'sustainability' and 'portability.' One of the walls of my new home was 'already built' and I could theoretically live any where in the world, just as long as there was some sort of 'wall' where my home could be attached. I did not need multiple rooms, a restroom, or even many furnishings beyond a bundle of cloth to sleep upon.

No longer do I need to be 'connected to a world' so I no longer require television, internet, nor radio. I am truly free. I have formed a small bartering community with other 'underlings' and we trade essential goods and services.

I am finally home. This is my structure. It took me 20 years of being an architect to finally realize what it means to feel 'at home' within a structure. After years of searching for a place where I belong after the death of my mother, I finally felt 'free.' While many people within society would thing that I am 'a piece of shit', they don't realize that until you have learned what it takes to create+alter space, u don't truly understand how 'structures', 'buildings', and miscellaneous portals of space have changed U as a person.

U R Where U Live.
This Bro Is Me.

Previous homelessness coverage
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/12/homelessness-big-in-2k9.html
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2009/06/my-parents-kicked-me-out-of-the-house.html

Yall. I think I have found what I really want to do with my life. I want to design buildings. I want to affect/effect space. I want to challenge reality. I want to tell the world about my strong philosophical viewpoints [via building buildings that look kewl/modern/nontraditional]

I was thinking about getting my portfolio ready 4 submission. Might create some Frank Lloyd Wright buildings out of LEGO

Should I live an efficiency designed by Rem Koolhaus? ($950/month)

Should I specialize in AZN design?

Should I build tall buildings, or just stout ones that look kewl?

Should I build lil penis buildings?

Does n e 1 know where the best architecture school in the world is?
Does n e 1 know where I can study abroad to learn the most about space/public space/etc?
Do yall think people who go to archy school are either 'fucking weirdos' or 'trying too hard'?
I need to get my applications ready. Might ask some of the commenters for recommendation letters [via comments].
Have yall read that Ayn Rand book 'The Fountainhead'? Will my life be more interesting/transcendental if I study architecture?

I feel like archy school might be more authentic than design school cuz ur not just 'fucking around in photoshop' trying to make something on a screen look kewl. u actually get to leave a mark on reality. Feel excited about this new era.

Yall-- got some bad news. Probably won't be able to blog as much since I got kicked of design school (I usually do most of my blogging from public wifi or the Digital Imaging Apple Lab). I was actually a student worker in the lab, and decided 2 start a lil business where I would use the large scale printers to make custom posters for my friends. It has actually always been my dream to start a t-shirt/poster eCommerce website.

N e ways... was actually printing out a hi resolution image for myself. Just wanted to hang this picture of Crystal Castles lead singer Alice Glass on my ceiling right above my bed. A lot of mainstreamers have pix of Jessica Alba/Cindy Crawford/Bob Marley in their room. I just wanted to alt-ify my dorm room a bit [via tugging urself 2 sleep].

But yea... my dickhead professor walked in and 'flipped a shit.' I wasted s00 much of the department's ink budget. He was angry, and said that my ideas were bullshit anyways because I just 'put Helvetica over everything and call it ART.' I was immediately called into the Dean's Office, and had a talk. My grades were low, yall. Just been getting caught up in other aspects of life, and sometimes I just don't care about meaningless Art History/Photoshop projects. Just want to get a Marc Jacobs/Urban Outfitters/Busted Tees internship. Got asked to resign from school so that they wouldn't have to expell me. Had to clear out of my dorm room by 5 pm. sucked.

Going to pretend that I am still going to college for the rest of the semester, then just pretend to drop out so that my parents aren't mad at me/stop paying my rent and make me move back 2 suburbia.

Have yall ever gotten in trouble for using resources that u weren't supposed 2?
Have yall ever been in trouble? How do yall 'deal with it'? Do u just try to say ur not supposed to fit in2 society and that every1 else is stupid and doesn't 'get' what 'truly matters'?

I think one concept that sets me apart from entry levels+ mainstreamers is my ability to value 'space.' Most mainstreamers don't even know what 'space' really means. They think it's what exists outside of the Earth's atmosphere. SPACE is everything.

You are in a space right now. Are you in an authentic space? More than likely not. Unless you live in an authentic apartment, are utilizing wifi at an authentic coffee house, or are in a public space in a major metropolitan area utilizing free city-wide wifi. SPACE means thinking about every compartment of Earth like it is an art gallery. Within this white walled art gallery, you are supposed to produce a meaningful experience by either creating a product or service, or interacting with people. Your meaningful experience will some how relate to humanity on a global scale.

SPACE is intended to bring us together.
SPACE is intended to unite communities.
SPACE is intended to bring the poors, coloureds, whites, and rich whites together.
SPACE is intended to make you more productive.
SPACE is intended to make your community look more 'real.'
SPACE makes you feel like your life is more meaningful.
SPACE makes small things like 'taking a poop' more meaningful if your experience is enhanced by your surroundings.
SPACE is everything.
SPACE may or may not be architecture.
SPACE may or may not be design.
SPACE is a concept--not a realization.
We will never find the perfect space in which to exist because there is no perfect society.
SPACE = rage against nature.
SPACE = merging our city's 'authentic vibe' with a sub-compartment's (apartment, park, coffee shop, etc.) spacial brand
SPACE = spacial branding.
SPACE has meaningful words on the walls in meaningful/authentic fonts.
SPACE is the host of 90% of the world's 'installations.'

I was watching this meaningful clip about building a community space. How many times can u count the word "SPACE" utilized?

Do you remember back before the internet existed, there was a demand for 'creating a positive space that was capable of operating community events'? In this space, any alternative event could take place. A concert, an art show, a local arts & crafts garage sale, a workshop to build u a bike from recycled parts, or even miscellaneous after-school programs to embed alternative values and goals in lil kids. This SPACE is flexible and can be called a 'multi-use space' because u can do just about n e thing in there. (This SPACE is B.Y.O.B.)

Less authentic synonyms for 'space':

• property
• room
• apartment
• place
• retail floor
• ballroom
• cheap property on the pre-gentrified part of town
• room with white walls/zany coloured walls
• four-walled area
• art gallery
• mega-churches
• aesthetic centres
• IKEA-filled compartment
• loft
• condo
• Frank Gehry/Frankie Lloyd Wright

This is a post about being worried about the future of SPACE as an alternative goal. The truth is, SPACE costs money--in order to . The tasks which you could perform inside of a meaningful space usually aren't profitable. The internet usually provides a more flexible, 24-7 forum in which goods can be created and sold, humans can interact, and meaningful relationships can be forged. Can alternative entrepreneurs and alt-non-profit organizations really pay rent for a community space?

SPACE = bar - liquor license ?

Here are quotes that are inspired by spaces which I occupy:

• "The concert was amazing. The club's acoustics really brought out the best in Ben Gibbard's voice. Even though there were a lot of people there, the space made it seem like a meaningful get-together."
• "I just want to move out of the dorms and be in my own space. I have a Container Store gift certificate."
• "We went to my friend's show at an art gallery. The people who ran the space were really uptight about under-aged drinking."
• "The space was owned by a wealthy guy who was trying to make friends within the local alternative community. He used to work for MTV News and now he is trying to start an authentic lil thing."
• "I hate work. It's just the vibe. Something about being at that desk all day makes me want to kill myself. I'd give anything to work at Google. The get to put anything they want in their offices. They get to create their own positive work space."
• "It was crowded, but it made the experience more meaningful. The speaker system failed, but we kept dancing. It was hot. We were sweaty. I'll never forget what it was like to be crammed in that space during the great Dance Revival of 2k7."
• "I want 2 create a space where I can communicate with ppl. I want all interactions 2 b authentic & meaningful. I am building a myspace profile."
• "I am thinking of throwing an event to launch my new web/print zine. Do u know who runs the local alternative community multi-use/multi-function retractable dome community space?"

What does SPACE mean 2 u?
Have u been in any positive/negative spaces lately?
When u r in a 'mainstream' space, does it make u feel less unique?
Should I use HRO ad money to 'buy a community space' where we could do arts & crafts/blog/hang out/'make' 'art'/etc.?

///////////////////////////////////////////
I have a dream. That one day. Every parcel of land on God's green Earth. Will be positive community space. Which brings us together. Under one common goal. Of enhancing space. And doing things. Within this space. And meeting people. And returning to this space. Multiple times. To have meaningful interactions. With these people. Who I met in this space. Where we can all age together. And bring our children. To keep this space. Functional and alive for years to come.


/// SPACE: THE FINAL ALTERNATIVE FRONTIER