Brands & Branding | Hipster Runoff

Brands & Branding

Lamestreamers on Facebook claim that SKINS is making indie bands go mnstrm

Facebook is a place where humans come together to share ideas, experiences, and how they feel abt modern culture thru millions of 'musings' every day. It seems like MTV's SKINS has been hella controversial. First they used Animal Collective's "My Girls" [link] as their intro song, and then every1 realized that the show was kiddie porn [link].

Now it seems like some alts have finally spoken up against Skins, saying that the show has given indie bands an unfair platform from which 2 'get more exposure' and go mainstream.
lamestreamers on facebook
First a lamestreamer is like "Ughhh Sleigh Bells is gonna go mnstrm bc of Skins."

Then some1 is like "Yea! and AnCo 2! Effing bitches."

Then the original lamestreamre is like "Skins is ruining everything!! EFF MY LYFE."

Then some megalamestreamer is like "Animal Collective effing sux. Who likes them. They sound like poop."

Then a true alt is like "That's cuz ur an idiot and don't 'get' the indie scene.'

Then the lamestreamer_1 is like "Why u no likey?"

Then the anti-Ancostreamer is like "They kill the vibes [via Ducktails]"

Eventually the convo digresses, and ppl start saying the usual "UK Skins is better than USA Skins."

Then every1 is like "hells yeah! We wish we could move 2 the UK bc if we lived their, our lives would be way better.'

Then they talked about some plotlines like any lamestreamer would.

Then they were like "Let's meet up next week and watch the 5th trimester abortion episode of Teen Mom."


Is USA Skins better than UK Skins?
Is Skins helping bands 2 go mnstrm?
Do yall 'get' Animal Collective?
Are yall 'over' AnCo?
Do u talk about indie stuff on facebook with ur bros?
Have yall enjoyed Season 1 of Skins?

Sleigh Bells


Sleigh Bells is a 2k10 buzzband that doesn't really make 'good' mp3s, but still gets a lot of buzz and sells a lot of albums.

Read more>>>>

Unchill AZN Bro wears mad unchill child predator glasses

unchill azn bro zany
Hi Unchill AZN Bro
I miss u in 2k11
R u still unchill
or have u kinda gotten a lil bit more chill?

Based on ur child predator glasses
Riding Eli Cash waves
maybe zoning out on mescaline all day
Always wanting 2 be a Tenenbaum
unchill azn bro child predator glasses

I wanna get 2 know u again.
Did u start a new buzzband?
These bros look pretty hella unchill

I hope ur okay
I'm trying 2 be chiller
We all are.
Nvr give up on 2mrrw
Nvr give up

Do yall miss Unchill AZN Bro in 2k11?
Do u think child predator glasses will 'come back' in 2k11?
R u more or less chill than u were in 2k10?
Has the blizzard chilled out all of us?

PS: I miss u Nico.
nico unchill azn bro

Is Arnold Schwarzenegger's son an 'effing hipster' or just a California bro?

Patrick Schwarzenegger Arnold's son
I just saw this picture of "Patrick Schwarzenegger", who is apparently the son of Arnold Schwarzenegger. You might know his dad from the popular films Twins, Predator 2: Lost in New York, Erasure, and as Mr. Freeze in "Batman and Robin," which many consider 2 be his best role.


Anyways, I was looking at Arnold's son Patrick, and I couldn't help but ask, "is he an effing hipster or what?
Patrick Schwarzenegger Arnold's son
Northface tech vest: Way too Bro
Skinny Jeans: Kinda Alt
Rambo boots: Probably some sort of mainstream Austrian skull crushing boots
Muscles: Bro
Kennedy bloodline: kinda maltstream

Verdict: Just another California Style Bro who is kinda alt, but just a streamer.

I guess A

Do u wish Arnold was ur dad?
Do u think his dad 'forces him' 2 work out?
If ur dad was rich, would u be alt or a bro-streamer?
Did Mr. Freeze invent chillwave?
What is Arnold's best role?
R u glad he is finally 'a regular citizen' instead of being governor so now he can make movies about shit blowing up and fighting bad guys?
Which mainstream celeb has the most authentic alternative spawn?

NSFW: Unknown Slutwave Lolita films free webcam sex show as her latest music video

In our modern, interactive, social networking world, we have seen the world of pornography go from producing static jpg content, to video content, and now we are in the era of the interactive pornographic sexual experience with a random webcam girl who is trying to make her living 'shoving toys in her vagina + butt' instead of applying at her local strip club 2 grind her vagine on men [via lap dances]. This LIVE pornographic experience has been the only innovation that has saved the porn industry from the youtubization of their content.

Have yall ever used a porn webcam service? Does it help 'get u off' more than traditional pornography?

It seems like Bunny Holiday's latest music video entitled "Tender Young Flesh" features her in some sort of simulated sex video chat room. She is chatting with hornball bros, waiting to 'go into a private video chat' with them. She shows off her sexie body, tempting u. U can't help but sit around waiting for her 2 reveal more of her goodies.

Does Bunny Holiday 'look better than evr'?
R u glad that we 'solved' the mystery behind the Unknown Slutwave Lolita?
Is Bunny ur favourite alt slutwaver?

Oh Bunny...

I wanna webcam with u
watch u violate urself
Stick miscellaneous objects in miscellaneous holes in ur body
Help u make a living
Just by riding slutwaves
on the internet

Do u <3 Bunny Holiday?
Would u pay upwards of $10 to see a 'webcam show' with Bunny Holiday?
Do u <3 Bunny Holiday's music, or is she 'only about image [via body]'?
Is 'pleasuring urself' while watching webcam girls 'dark', or 'good, clean, safe sexual fun'?
Is this video conceptually fulfilling, or just standard 'modern shock art that provides generic commentary on life in the modern world'?
Do u know any1 who 'webcams' for money?
Are you more into 'getting naked on Chat roulette' 4 strangers 4 free?
Who do u 'respect' more: strippers or webcam girls?

"shhh. gnite yall."

VIDEO: #Project_Girl calls in2 the HIPSTER RUNOFF hotline


The HIPSTER RUNOFF HOTLINE is a distress line 4 lost alts who just need a little bit of help and direction. Carles takes the time 2 answer questions from the hotline on the HIPSTER RUNOFF PODCAST. It seems like #Project_Girl aka Allie Teilz called in2 the hotline because she needed help.

She needed answers.
She needed 2 know whether or not she was entry-lev or authentic.
She spotted Alice Glass at Subway.
She just wanted 2 talk 2 Carles.

Have u evr called the HRO hotline (909) BRO-SKI2

Do u have answers 2 Project Girl's questions?
1 day will we all be authentic?
Will her cat be more famous than Snacks 1 day?
Will she stay relevant in 2k11?
Will her 'sophomore project' be a MGMT-esque 'flop'?

Shannon Gaga, Unchill AZN Bro, Project Girl

Allie Teilz

Alternative Entrepreneur

Allie Teilz, also known as #ProjectGirl is a girl who once made a project abt HIPSTER RUNOFF.

Read more>>>>

Lamestreamers on Facebook wet their panties over how 'hot' Jared Leto is

Facebook is a place where ppl chill out and have fun and talk about life, love, buzzbands and other relevant topics. Every user has the ability to create his or her own 'social network' where you can connect + communicate with ppl from the past.

It seems like some females choose to talk abt 'hot bros.' In this conversation, 2 lamestreamers talk abt 'how hot' Jared Leto is.

First some girl is like "mmmmmmmm.... Jared. Fucking. Leto. I wanna suck his peen and let him taste my vajeng."

then another girl comes along and is like "Awww helll yeeeah. He is God. I want 2 start a religion called Letoianity where every1 has 2 'beat off' 2 Jared Leto 3x per day."

Then the first girl is like "Can't even explain how much I <3 JarLet."

Then the other Letostreamer is like "I just saw the video for Hurricane and came so many times during it."

30 Seconds to Mars "HURRICANE" (Uncensored) from Rui Delgado on Vimeo.

Then another streamer is like, "I tried 2 watch it but my parents can't afford hi-speed internet but I still <3 him and want him 2 take my virginity."

and then the other 1 is like "I've been in2 Jared Leto since Fight Club. Really think we'll end up 2gether."

Finally, one streamer is like "Oh shit. Jared Leto is 39 fucking years old? Dear lord, that is an old ass man. That's as old as my dad." Not so sexy any more. Kinda turned off."

Is Jared Leto 'totally sexy'?
Do u think his 39 year old peen would make u happy?
Is Jared Leto very healthy for a 40 year old man?
Why do girls think Jared Leto is s000 haute?

Did Jared Leto throw away a promising Brad Pitt-like career just to make crappy music in his buzzband?

Jared Leto

Actor, Buzzband

Jared Leto is an alternative actor, and the lead singer of the band 30 Seconds to Mars.

Read more>>>>

Unchill AZN Bro wears Unchill tube top

With outfits like this 1
How can Unchill AZN Bro
Not return in 2k11?

Vibing out
tubetop style
Wearing a military hat
vibing out with his bros

U know M Bison
[via Street Fighter 2]
That bro was mad hard 2 beat

Vega Sagat
Ryu Ken Guile

Ur costume
looks kinda like
a 'mashup'
of E Honda and M Bison
That's chill
[via nostalgic images of youth]

Should Unchill AZN Bro 'return' in 2k11?
Who was the most authentic Street Fighter 2 character?
Was Street Fighter 'more authentic' than Mortal Kombat?

Unknown Slutwave Lolita has a diy slutwave concert

Who r u, Unknown Slutwave Lolita?
I noticed u have a buzzband.
How is ur buzz show?
Did u do anything 'sexual' during ur show?

It seems like u have a following of dedicated slutwavers
wearing see-thru tops

I really wanna experience the power of ur live show

Unknown Slutwave Lolita...
I'm kinda in2 u
but I can't tell if ur 'the Andy Milonakis of Slutwave'
via being 30 years old but looking like a 14 year old

Ur body is truly an alt wonderland

Oh Unknown Slutwave Lolita
There's nothing unchill abt u...
want 2 know more abt u...

Do u think that the diy slutwave scene is 'thriving'?
Has the current crop of mainstream slutwave artists inspired a new wave of indie slutwavers?
Will there be a resurgence in indie slutwavers, sorta like when 'Peaches' came up in the game?
Do u think that this is a conceptual 15 year old, or a 29 year old who has a lil lolitan body?
Will Unknown Slutwave Lolita ever be 'discovered' by the mainstream, or is she a slutwave purist who doesn't do it for the fame/notoriety?

#Project_Girl does sexi photoshoot in support of her new vintage store

#Project_Girl is a girl who made a school project abt HIPSTER RUNOFF [link], which she obtained a perfect score on [link]. It seems like she is 'rebranding', launching an online vintage store with multiple QT models, like herself. R u going to support her vintage store? She did a new saucy photo shoot 4 her brand.

Do yall <3 the new saucy, entrepreneurial Project_Girl, or do u miss the innocent Project_Girl who we all came 2 know and <3?

Will #ProjGirl stay in the headlines in 2k11? Do u <3 Proj_girl?

Who do u want to see more/less coverage of in 2k11:
a) Bebe Zeva
b) Project_Girl
c) Snacks the Cat Girl 1.0
d) Snacks the Cat Girl 2.0
e) all of the above

Allie Teilz

Alternative Entrepreneur

Allie Teilz, also known as #ProjectGirl is a girl who once made a project abt HIPSTER RUNOFF.

Read more>>>>

Urban Outfitters now selling clip-on bangs made from human hair

In case yall didn't know, 'bangs' are a relevant alternative hair fashion trend for alternative females. Bangs come in multiple forms, enabling women to look all keut and potentially alt. However, some girls can't grow bangs, or they don't want to take the huge risk of cutting them and looking 'dumb.' This is why Urban Outfitters created 'clip on bangs.'

It seems like these 'clip on bangs' are 4 girls who want bangs, but don't want to risk cutting their hair. Maybe I will get a pair. From what I heard, tons of African American women already wear 'clip on hair' and miscellaneous 'weaves', so maybe this is just another example of how alternative culture 'steals' from pre-existing culture.

R u gonna get clip on hair at Urban Outfitters? Sorta wish I coulda donated my hair 2 be re-sold at Urban Outfitters instead of 'growing it down to my butt', then donating it to 'Locks of Love.'

* 100% human hair
* Hand wash
* Imported
* 8"l
* Web exclusive

Simple clip-on bangs made with 100% natural human hair, so you can curl, cut, color and style just like your own hair. Now you can have super chic blunt bangs without the commitment of cutting your own hair. This fabulous fringe looks real, feels real and stays put! The hair should be washed as infrequently as possible or when you notice that the hair appears dull or acquires an odor. If you are wearing the hair all day, every day, you can wash them after 3-4 wearings.

Do u wear clip on hair?
Is clip on hair 'mad sexy' or 'mad tacky'?
Are hair extensions for 'tacky white ppl'/people who think that they are 'famous'?

Are clip on bangs going 2 be the next relevant alt trend?
R u going to buy these bangs and 'remix them [via chopped and screwed]'?
Should I just start wearing a series of wigs that have different alt hair styles?
Is Urban Outfitters just 'selling this shit' to 'go viral' on 'alt blogs'?
Should I start a hair farm?
Does n e 1 know where I can find a Donation Station for Urban Outfitters hair reselling?
Is clip on hair 'mad tacky'?
Do u miss the search for the perfect alternative bangs? [link]

Miss u bang era

CNN rebrands 2 appeal 2 more Mexis, HIPSTER RUNOFF launches Spanish language site

CNN is a website 4 liberal mainstreamers who 'think the are interesting' bc they read the news, but aren't snarky enough to be all like "I love the Daily Show and the Colbert Report! Effing genius! Obama 4evr. H8 Fox News Bill O'Reilly is bullshit. Eff George W. Bush. I am interesting, I read news but not the newspaper and not the local news, but basically just as krappie." Anyways, CNN has a similar content stream for the Hispanic 'Underworld' called CNN En Español.

They apparently have a new logo with an "ñ" over the two "N's" in the CNN logo. This is supposed to be 'more conceptual and help Latinos 'identify' with the brand.

CNN en Español keeps the channel’s iconic red logotype, but will now include a tilde over the two “N’s.” This device suggests movement, the dynamic nature of news, and a reference to the language that unites our viewers.
— Press Release

Do u think this logo is 'brilliant' or 'effing dumb'?
Is CNN 'a legit news source' + 'content provider' or are they basically 'the local national news'?
Do all ppl in the Third World get their news from Al Chareezo [via Usaman Ben Laden]?
Do u think ur gonna start learning Spanish so u can get in2 this brand?


Inspired by the CNN en Espanol logo, HIPSTER RUNOFF has decided to launch HIPSTER RUÑOFF, a site for MexiAlts and Altinos.

Bienvienidies Al HIPSTER RUÑOFF, un blogotequa que tiene que blogar sobre.
Me llamo Carles. Sígueme en el Twitter.

¿Es HIPSTER RUÑOFF muy estupido y lamestreamando?
¿Es el blogger Carles del HIPSTER RUÑOFF un hombre muy chistoso?
¿Es HIPSTER RUÑOFF muy mainstreamanda?
¿Estas en #EquipoHIPSTERRUÑOFF o #EquipoAmericanoBlanca?
¿Piensas que CNN en Espanol es muy 'effing lame'?
¿Sabes un websitio muy 'alt' en el internecio?
¿Escucha a la indie banda Managmento o Semana de Los Vampiros?
¿Tienes Mac o PeeCe?
¿Quieres que leer HIPSTER RUÑOFF todos los dias o nunca quiere leer este bloga?


Meme, DJ, Company, Buzzband, Blog, Alternative Celebrity

HIPSTER RUNOFF is a blog worth blogging abt, created by Carles that is trying 2 stay relevant. It blogs abt buzzbands, alt stuff, relevant topics, the end of the social web, and more.

Read more>>>>

Lamestreamers on Facebook sing Neon Indian's "Shoulda Taken Acid with You"

Neon Indian is a 2k9 buzzband who is preparing his hit followup sophomore LP in order 2 enter the great chillwave/indie war of 2k11. However, some ppl still really <3 the first album, and have moments on facebook where they are like "I'm going to submit a vague indie lyric as my status so that I seem deep." However, some mainstreamers aren't familiar with indie songs, so they can get confused.

You'll never guess what happened this time...

The Lamestreamer was like "SHOULDA TAKEN ACID WITH YOUUUU."

Then a mainstreamer was like "NOOOOO! Don't take acid! It stays in ur spine forever. Plz don't. Acid is bad 4 u. Please don't take it."

Then the lamestreamer is like "chill out bitch. First of all, ur not my mom. Second of all, it is just a lyric by the chillwave buzzband Neon Indian. Get the eff off my facebook if ur gonna be a bitch 2 me. I know all of ur secrets/dark problems"

******END SCENE *******
Should I have taken acid with yall?
Do u h8 it when ppl leave 'deep lyrics' as their status?
Are 'lyrics' overrated as a form of facebookian/twitterian expression?
R u tired of lamestreamers and mainstreamers?
Should I have taken acid with lamestreamer?

Neon Indian


Neon Indian is a chillwave buzzband from 2k9 that rode chillwaves

Read more>>>>

Lamestreamers make some 'funnie skit' abt winning tickets 2 a Passion Pit Concert


From what I understand, there is a new brand of 'web humor' that is basically trying to get 'youtube views' instead of 'laughs.' 'Views' are a metric that potentially 'mean more' than laughs, so there are tons of groups of bros with HD Video cameras that 'try 2 make funnie videos that go viral.'

Anyways, it seems like this 'web comedy group' made a 'skit/video' abt winning tix 2 a pash pit concert bc they think it makes them 'totally indie.'

In this video, some bro is in an elevator, and he is like "I have tix the the Pashy Pit concert" and he asks some broad "Do u wanna come see this indie buzzband with me?"

Girl: "What are they called?"
Bro: "The Pashy Pits!"
Girl: "OMG they are so awesome."

[enter Janitor Bro]

Janitor: Oh hey bro I heard u on the radio. U cried. Here I have an audio tape.
Bro: Sigh...another indie bro bites the dust! Here's my tix! Laters. See u in the elevator at our office building.
Janitor: CHA CHING! Pashy Pit here we come!


Do u think these web comedy bros 'crushed it'?
Do u think this video is bad 4 Passion Pit's brand?
Should these bros have picked a better band 2 win tickets 2?
Do u call in2 radio stations to win indie buzzband tickets?
Is this skit 'original' and 'innovative'?
Do u know a group of bros are are 'trying 2 make it' as a web comedy group?
Do u feel sad for 'web comedy' bros bc they are 'trying so hard 2 go viral'?
Will this video go 'indie viral'?
Will Pitchfork give this web skit a 10.0?

Passion Pit

Passion Pit is a bleepy bloop indie pop band that tons of entry-level alts <3.

Read more>>>>

Vampire Weekend writes the official jingle for the Honda Civic commercial


Recently, Tommy Hilfiger put the song "Holiday" by Vampy Weeks in2 one of their commercials [link]. It seems like Vampy Weeks 'cashed in' because they also sold the rights to the song to Honda in this new commercial for Honda Civic. The commercial is supposed 2 have that whole 'quirky'/'artsy' aesthetic going on, so I guess they wanted a song that sounded whimsical 2 mainstreamers.

I wonder if Honda/Tommy Hilfiger is pissed that Vampy Weekend 'hustled them'/'two-timed' them. While many ppl

Do u think this commercial will make u want to buy a Honda Civic?
From what I understand, Honda Civics are for high school girls and sensible young adults who don't have enough money to buy more of a luxury sedan, so the Civic is something that shows ur sensible, not poor, and still trying to make more money.

I guess it was a good idea that they put Vampy Weeks in their commercial so they can have an 'upscale brand' instead of being 'the official street racing car of AZNs.' [via Tokyo Drifting while ur 2 fast and 2 furious gone in 60 seconds]

Did Vampire Weekend strategically compose this song to make 'mad bank'?
Does Vampy Weeks have to raise 'mad capital' to pay Kirsten Kennis' broke ass?
Do u think the label is 'green lighting' these commercials bc of Kirsten?
Will 'Holiday' be used in another holiday-themed ad before the year is over?
Will Vampire Weekend's exposure in these commercials lead them 2 become 'bigger than U2' when their next album is released?
Is 'writing songs 4 commercials' the best way to make $$$ as a band?
Will Vampy Weeks next album get a 10.0 from p4k?

Tommy Hilfiger buys a Vampire Weekend song to put in their commercial


Tommy Hilfiger is a popular 'preppy wave' brand that 'effing prepsters' like to wear, except maybe they don't wear Tommy Hilfiger any more and only gang members wear it + their smell ghetto cologne. Can't really tell who 'still wears' Tommy Hilfiger. Feel like preppy bros just wear Polo / Northface / ________. Anyways, they have some new commercial that is trying to rip off the Wes Anderson wave and make it seem like their clothes are meaningful or something, and they utilized the Vampire Weekend song "Holiday" in the commercial.

It makes sense that they purchased the rights 2 the Vampire Weekend mp3 "Holiday" to try to save their brand. Remind ppl "We are more than just a brand that sells oversized polo shirts 2 cholo gang members."

Do yall know who the Tommy Hilfiger brand resonates with?

Is it one of those brands that gang members wear, or do 'real preppy ppl' wear it?
Is this some sort of agreement 2 give Kirsten Kennis a modeling contract with Thomas Hillfingers?
Is "Holiday" the best mp3 on "Contra" or are u on #TeamHorchata?
Should I write a blog post abt how this is a 'perfect pairing' because 'Vampy Weeks is sooo preppy'?

Will Vampire Weekend's "Contra" be the album of the year in 2k10?


Is Ezra Koenig 'the hottest bro in indie music'?

Lamestreamers on facebook argue abt who is Album of the Year

Lamestreamers, lamestreamers everywhere...
but not a band to buzz

more lamestreamers
confronting important indie issues
but having 'no effing clue' abt
what is authentic/relevant
and what is just another poop poopy poop in the toilet that is the blogosphere

...sigh... we go again...


Then some1 is all like 'hell naw. Phoenix is the album of 2k10. Eff Vampy Weeks.'

Then the bro comes back all like "Pshhhh. Phoenix is from 2k9 u effing idiot. How behind the times r u? Get on board with Vampy Weeks--I think ur a contra."

Then Phoenix bro is all like "Yeah I know it is from 2k9, but it is still the album of the year."

Then Vampy wEeks bro is like "#TeamContra."

Then a completely totally alt dude comes out of nowhere and says "LISTEN 2 BEST COAST. ALBUM OF THE YEAR. BETTER THAN PHOENIX + VAMPY WEEKS PUT 2GTHR"


Do u agree with these bros?
Is Phoenix the album of the year?
Did Phoenix come out in 2k8 or 2k9?
Will Vampy Weeks win Album of the Year?
Will Best Coast win 'Meme Maker' of the year?
Do lamestreamers know anything abt music/buzzbands?
Who is the ultimate lamestreamer indie band?

Sufjan Stevens dresses like a Jonsi-wave neon indian, prances around on stage

Photos via Pitchfork by Will Dietz

Who r u?
U look kinda familiar
R u that lil free spirited bro from Iceland?

I think his name is Jonsi (the distant cousin of Bjork)

Oh damn
Is that u Sufjan?

U look kinda like u compartmentalized the Jonsi Icelandic Neon Indian Costume
in2 several costumes
That's chill I guess
Not sure if ur 'ripping him off'
or yall are just 'in the same tribe' or something

So many costume changes
Feels like a Lady Gaga concert or something
Keut Jacket. I think I got the same 1 from Am Appy a few years ago
Not sure what to make of ur new brand
Kinda confused
Thought u just played banjo
and sang in a humble voice

That's kewl, I guess...

Rlly confused
U look like an electro Arab in this pic
Electro Bin Laden
AltBro Hussein

Photo via Brooklyn Vegan by Dave Andrako

Oh Sufjy....
Rlly can't tell the difference between u and Jonsi any more
Except that Jonsi potentially makes better/more uplifting music
and Sufjan's stuff is all bleepy bloopy

Dance! Sufjy! Dance!


U r the ultimate electro altbro

Wonder if Jonsi has stolen ur meaningfulcore market share

Can u tell the difference between Jonsi and Sufjan Stevens?
Who makes better music?
Who is more authentic?
Who is keuter?
Who would u rather go on a meaningful camping trip with [via being from the Neon Indian wilderness]?
Do u think their costumes are offensive to groups of ethnic ppl?

Lamestreamers on Facebook discover the song "KIDS" by MGMT

MGMT is a band that has a hit song called "KIDS" but then they wrote a bunch of songs that weren't as poppy as KIDS so then they made other albums and ppl were like "Why didn't u write more songs that sound like KIDS?" and then ppl were pissed/sad.

Anyways, some lamestreamers on facebook discussed the popular song KIDS and made some sweet band recommendations:

First a lamestreamer is talking to her BFF and says 'I miss dancing with u soo bad! Have u heard KIDS by the Managmant?'

Then she instantly replies and is like "Check out Sleepyheads by the Pashy Pit, yall!"

Then some1 is all like "Aww hell yeah! KIDS! Oracular Spectacular is the effing shit."

Then some1 says "Yeah that album is as good as the Beatles. I heard MGMT's second album was rlly terrible. N e ways g2g ttyl"

Do u think it is a bad sign when lamestreamers h8 ur second album?
Is KIDS.mp3 the greatest song ever written?
Can MGMT 'recover' from their second album?
R u happy that 2k10 is almost ovr so we can 4get abt "Congratulations"?
Do u <3 or h8 the Pashy Pit / Managment?
Have u seen any lamestreamers on facebook talking abt anything relevant recently?

Urban Outfitters rebrands with an ugly new logo

It seems like in 2k10, every company is trying to rebrand, creating a new logo that makes their brand seem modern/bad ass/etc. I remember when GAP made a new logo, but then ppl on the internet were like 'that is ugly + stupid, yall', and then they changed it [link].

Urban Outfitters decided to create a new logo. I don't even know if they have an official logo. Maybe this is just a crappy logo that they put up on their website to drive traffic after the new GAP logo got so much internet buzz. Probably just trying to design something way dumber, see if it is a good marketing gimmick.

Does Urby Outtie have an official logo? Do they have a 'flexible logo' that represents constant evolution + 'now-ness'? Do logos grow old and die? Should Coca Cola rebrand [via cursive]?

Do u think they used Microsoft Word Art to design their logo? Is the Adobe Creative Suite 'overrated'?

Do u believe in the power of graphic design?
Is Urban Outfitters a legit store, or the ultimate entry level over-priced thrift store?
Why do u think Urby Outfitters is doing well, but Am Appy is 'swirling down the shitter'?
Do u think re-branding helps brands sell more goods?
Does this logo 'crush it'?
R u gonna start using Microsoft Word / Word Art 2 do most of ur designing?
What is 'the new aesthetic' now that the Helvetican look is 'dead'?
Is the new Myspace logo the #1 re-brand of 2k10? [link]

Urban Outfitters


Urban Outfitters is an alternative retailer that sells a bunch of clothes and knick knacks 2 alt ppl.

Read more>>>>

Sad lil clown drinks a brewskie, thinks abt life.

photos by Tim Griffin via Brooklyn Vegan

I'm the lil clown bro
I'm sad
even though I'm a clown
I'm not happy

Know this is making u laugh
U think I'm funny
not just because of my clown costume
face paint
my small 'little person' stature

Maybe in a way, we're all clowns
We're all fools
we all make some1 laugh
4 all the wrong reasons

U think I'm funnie?
Funnie how?
Like my life is a joke?
Everything I believe in is stupid?
I am just selling out 4 money
Making an ass out of myself every goddamned day?

Life is tough
and u think ur better than me
go ahead and effing laugh
I'm just gonna drink this Ice Cold Tecate Tall Boy

Stop laughing @me
Life's not a joke
I'm a real person
I'm not just an effing lil clown
I'm just trying to make a living
making ppl laugh
sorrie if I accidentally bummed u out
Wish I could make u laugh for all the right reasons..

I'm the lil sad clown bro

Maybe there's a lil bit of sad clown inside of all of us.


Maybe life will nvr get better.
Maybe it won't.
I don't effing know.
Just trying to make a living
make my parents proud
make ~$40k/year and have a highly relevant job
just like u, me, and every1 we know

Goodnite moon.
I did my best.
Love always,

Sad on the inside


dead on the inside

SNACKS THE CAT GIRL releases exclusive photo shoot out take

Snacks the Cat Girl is the winner of the 2010 HIPSTER RUNOFF HALLOWEEN COSTUME CONTEST [link]. She has 'won over the hearts' of the HIPSTER RUNOFF COMMUNITY, and many blog readers are 'craving more content.'

She recently released this 'exclusive picture' from her Halloween photo shoot. Do u think she made the right decision 2 go with the other picture?

R u falling deeper in <3 with Snacks the Cat Girl?
Did Snacks the Cat girl 'deserve 2 win'?
Do u <3 or h8 Snacks the Cat Girl?

-Snacks the Cat Girl, 2k10

BREAKING: #Project_Girl gets in car accident, has neck brace

Recently, some keut alt girl did a project about the popular weblog HIPSTER RUNOFF. She has 'won the hearts' of some HRO readers, but other HRO ppl are all like 'eff her.' Only G-d really knows how to feel about her because he is basically the ultimate personal branding expert.

However, it seems like every1 is now on #Team_Project_Girl after she was in a car accident on Halloween night. Reports say that her car was stationary when some1 slammed into her car going 60 MPH. Hope she is okay.

Here is some vlog where she is listening to the now-defunct buzzband "Jesus Christ." (the indie band)


Do u think Jesus Christ is healing her?

R u sad that we almost lost #Project Girl?

R u glad that she is 'crushing it'?

R u sad that some1 literally tried to 'crush her' [via car crash]?
R u praying for her?
Would u be sad if a popular member/meme/internet of ur daily internet rounds 'died' and u never knew what happened to them?
Do u think #Project_Gurl is just 'faking' for attention?
Is this just her Halloween gimmick?

Feel free to send her positive vibes in the comments/construct custom prayer poems 4 her.

R u going to vote for her in the HIPSTER RUNOFF HALLOWEEN COSTUME CONTEST? [link]

Lamestreamer high school bros dress as Vampire Weekend 4 Halloween

I know what ur thinking
We're just some high school bros
getting our conceptual / pun-wave costume on
But srsly
we're chill
we're authentic

We're honestly the alt-est guys in out high school
We make good grades
We are very popular and have won multiple student elections
We come from stable, upper-middle class homes

We're able to appreciate the indie sounds of the popular band Vampire Weekend
We h8 pop music and mainstream alt rock
We know there is more 2 life than what is in the_suburbs

We want to be accepted 2 relevant Ivy League Schools in the greater New England / NYC area
But we have strong public safety schools
where we would still be ensured a great education + amazing alumni networking opportunities

We 'killed it' at our talent show



///We're effing a punks, yall
See u on Halloweens
Gotta go to the cafeteria
2 eat some slopp joesies
and 2 finish my AP Calculus homework

Should we include our Vampire Weekend costume .jpg in our college resume?
Do u think they 'get' Vampy Weeks?
Are these bros buzzworthy, or are they just trying to get some Twilight-lovin' pussie?
Would u chill with these bros in high school?
Do u wish they had relevant indie bands when u were in high school?

#Project_Girl re-emerges, vlogs abt how Shannon Gaga is a fat slob


#Project_Girl is some girl who made a project about HIPSTER RUNOFF [link], but she only got a B on it. Many thought she would 'die away' as a coverable meme now that her project lifecycle is over, but it seems like she is continuing to generate 'bloggable content' that will appeal to the predominately male population of HIPSTER RUNOFF who are dedicated to find out more abt alt QTs.

It seems like during her religion class, she chose to make a list of unchill/chill stuff that she would rather be doing. She managed to use key buzzwords like "hipster bashing", "chillwave", "Snacks the Cat", "Alice Glass", and "Shannon Gaga."

She said that she would/wouldn't wanna sit next to Shannon Gaga on an airplane bc Shannon Gaga is all huskie, and would probably hog the arm rest, and try 2 steal ur snack or something, then fall asleep and start snoring and ruining ur noise cancelling headphones vibes.

Do yall think this was mean?
Is there some sort of 'rivarly' growing between her + ShanGag?
Should Shannon Gaga try 2 get revenge?
Is this vlog mean or chill?
Is this vlog authentic?
Do u think she is 'milking' HRO coverage too hard?
How do u pronounce MGMT?
Do u want to see her pantsless at a music festival?
Do u wanna share a $5 footlong with her?
What would u rather be doing?

Lamestreamers on facebook cream their pants ovr Crystal Castles

Facebook is a place where bros, alts, mainstreamers, and lamestreamers live their lives', coming home 2 the computer every night to reaffirm their social_network, ensuring that 1 day they will grow old and live in the_suburbs.

Anyways, have yall heard of the buzzband 'Crystal Castles.' Just found out that one of my best friends on the facebok vibes out 2 them. really weird/random!

First I embedded a Chrystal Castles song

then some 1 was like ' I <3 that song'

then some 1 was like 'no I <3 this song'

then some1 else was like 'i am DLing one from the internet! I hope it is good'

then some1 was like 'Alice Glass effing rules! Love her'

then some 1 was like 'have u heard of shitty band that sounds awesome cuz i have entry level ears?'

then some 1 was like 'no, should I DL them?'

then they posted a youtube embed link

then the entry level was like 'this effing rules'

then every1 was like 'Let's meet up and go 2 the Crystal Castles concert yall and be friends 4eaeaeae!'

then some1 was like 'I have a better idea... Let's make eachother mix CDs and listen to them as we drive around in our mid-sized, moderately sporty sedans. Yay 4 mix CDs!'

Do lamestreamers 'get' Crystal Castles?
Is Crystal Castles 4 entrylevs?
Do u find out abt new music on facebook?
Do lamestreamers eventually find out abt every band, or is there a way to be dark/unmarketable/unapproachable 2 prevent them from liking a buzzband [via the SALEM theory]?

Shannon Gaga CRUSHES IT, vibes out hard, proceeds 2 'kill it'







U crushed it Shannon Gaga...
U crushed it....

NSFW: Unchill AZN bro fondles some golden titties

Photo by the cobrasnake

Hi unchill azn bro
How r u?
That's chill
I guess

Oh damn
I see something in ur hand.
What is that?
Is that a tittie?
A tittie covered in gold?

The perfect alternative breast
Have we found it?
Is this it?

The golden tittie
cupped in ur hand
Worried that ur gonna mess it up
and prevent me from appreciating it

Maybe the Unchill Azn Bro was put on this earth
as a perf alt breast hunter
Maybe he can be a chill bro
Probs not though

Pissed @ him for ruining this picture
Just wanted to see some alt tit in gold paint
But then u just get unchill vibes
and ur like 'I wish my hand was where his hand is'
Cupping a golden tittie
perhaps suckling golden milk from it at the end of the night

Should be vibing out hard to the golden tittie
But I guess it isn't going to work out

Do u think this is the perfect alternative breast?
Do u want a golden peen / vag / teet?
Do u still vibe to unchill azn bro?
Do u h8 him?
R u hornie?

BREAKING: #Project_Girl hangs up her poster in classroom next 2 a few lamestream posters


Recently, a keut entry level alt girl did a 'class project' on the popular weblog HIPSTER RUNOFF [link]. She has become one of the most divisive human memes in HIPSTER RUNOFF history, perhaps opening up one of the greatest discussions since Unchill AZN bro required every1 to question the true definition of 'unchill.'

Do u feel like she really transcended her class by making such a sweet HRO poster? Do u think every1 else in her class is a teenage mainstreamer lamestreamer who listens to Jack Johnson and Taylor Swift?

Do u wish they had blogs when u were in HS?
Do u think teens are 'spoiled' by how much indie music they have at their finger tips?
Do u think she shoulda made a TayTay Swift/ JaxJohnsins poster?
Has Carles 'gone viral' at a local high school?
How many 'hits' is a poster board in a classroom worth? 1? 100? 1 billion?
Has this project 'captured the hearts and minds' of the blogosphere?


Is this posterboard the only 'great album' of 2k10?
Is #Project_Girl driving her meme in2 the ground?
Is she keut or are u ovr her?

M.I.A. dresses like a clown / conceptual Muslim woman

Not sure what the eff M.I.A. is trying to do. Seems like she still thinks people are going to buy her album even though she didn't write a song that was as good as "Paper Planes" so she keeps promoting her personal brand by wearing zany ass outfits. Not sure if she purchased this clown outfit via a custom designer or via the Halloween rack at WalMart. Wish she would stop trying to be all conceptual and just 'ride the slutwave', show off a lil bit more skin.

Women in music only really get my attention if they have a 'sick bod' or if they have a smokey voice [via Feist].

Not sure who invited M.I.A. to perform/walk the 'red carpet.' This photo was apparently taken at some awards show that no1 has heard of, so it is sorta like the equivalent of a D-list actor going to the Nickelodeon Kid's Choice Awards and acting like they have 2 'bring their A-game.' Guess u gotta hand it to her for 'getting noticed' even though she is 10% as 'mainstream famous' as the rest of the people there.

She also wore another outfit that was meant to be a bloggable meme.

Why did she dress like a conceptual Muslim woman? Is she trying to 'make a point' or something? Is she trying to be a 'walking billboard' that promotes her album?

Would it be possible for her to embed a hyperlink to 'buy her album off iTunes' on her zany dress?
Do u think M.I.A.'s husband made her 'cover up' so no1 else would 'steal her'?
Does M.I.A. look sexie?
Should she get a part time job as a 'birthday party clown'? Can she create balloon animals + hats?
Should M.I.A. be 'exported' 2 the Muslim world so she can't express herself?
R u sooo tired of M.I.A.?
Can her career 'rebound' or is she effed?
Is M.I.A. the most annoying female in indie music?
Does M.I.A. have any actual fans of her music, or is every1 sorta just looking at her giggling?
Does M.I.A. look like a clown / ninja / buzzband trying 2 hard to turn her personal brand in2 a meme / Muslim woman / slutwaver / __________?


Buzzband, Alternative Celebrity

M.I.A. is known for thinking that the American government is out 2 get her.

Read more>>>>

Lamestreamers on Facebook claim the Arcade Fire got them 'high'

As yall probs already know, Lamestreamers are everywhere, learning more about alternative culture, assimilating 2 vibe 2 indie bands just to enhance their personal brands 2 be kewl. One place lamestreamers like to hang out is the Facebook--a popular online dating service that gained popularity after the popular movie 'The Social Network'.

Anyways, just saw these 2 lamestreamers 'invade' my feed, singing some Arcade Fire lyrics.

First, some lamestreamer tries to be 'deep' by saying she is "in The_Suburbs" [via status message], letting ppl know that she identifies hard with the Arcade Fire brand. Wonder if most people saw this update and were like, 'ya--we all live in the suburbs--we're all lamestreamers.'

Then some lamestreamer is all like 'la la la la. Suburbs, yall. That's where I live. They wrote an album abt my hometown.'

Then a new lamestreamer is like "Mountains beyond mountains is the best mp3 evr!"

Some effing mainstreamer comes along and asks if every1 is 'high', because indie lyrics make u sound rlly effed up.

The Lamestreamer from The_Suburbs is like, "Yes. We are high. High off the Arcade Fire's live performance. It was a moving, beautiful experience that I cannot convey inside of facebook. U simply have to see them if u want to understand."

Next, the mainstreamer is like "huh? What? An arcade is on fire? What is that? s000 confused yall."

Then the lamestreamer provides her with a youtube link, exposing her to the new, kewl buzzband the Arcade Fire.

Feel kinda sad witnessing this. Like we just watched the process of an indie band going mainstream on a micro level or something. Just got super sad on the inside.

Is facebook ruining the authenticity of indie bands?
Has the Arcade Fire 'gone down the shitter'?
do lamestreamers 'ruin everything'?
Should Mark Zuckerberg kick off users in who are Lamestreamers?

Arcade Fire


The Arcade Fire is a 2k0s indie band that went mainstream because their songs sound like meaningful anthems. They pretend to be Canadian but Win Butler (lead singer) is actually from Houston, TX.

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