[MP3]
Beach House Norway

Analysis of the Cultural and Critical Impact of this Song:
This mp3 is the ‘beginning/launching point/kickoff’ of the 2k10 music season. The first step on an annual cycle to attempt to understand ‘who is the best/most culturally relevant/buzzworthy/meme-able’ band of the year. It is this cycle which gives the blogosphere purpose, giving us a reason to live/evaluate/judge even though ‘time’ is irrelevant on the internet.

Beach House’s PR/marketing team should be commended for setting the tone for 2k10. In the post-chillwave era, we will be looking for meaningful music that has substance–lyrically, emotionally, musically. No more ‘going to the beach and chilling’ music by bands who we will never hear from again. 2k10 will be all about people ‘overcompensating’ and ‘wanting a full album experience’ after spending the last 2-4 years scavenging for mp3s in the hypemachine world. Wonder if the XX will be cited as the end of chillwave since their album was so meaningful/vulns.

2k10 will feature releases by the established tier 1 bands such as Arcade Fire, Panda Bear, MGMT, Of Montreal, and Vampire Weekend. It seems like Beach House is on tier 2 of the indie band power chart, with a ‘beloved’ 1st and second album. I think the Beach House Theory of 2k10 would predict that Beach House is ‘the front runner’ for 2k10’s album of the year because of the criticism-sphere’s desire to ‘anoint’ a band that they ‘created.’ It seems ‘too predictable/boring’ for most web outlets to continue to gush over the same bands over and over, unless they are AnCo/PandyBear. We love to ‘watch a band grow’ into ‘artists who can put together a complete album.’ We will reward them for their efforts, and their willingness to share with us. If they are good to us during their buzzband phase and don’t do anything too inauthentic/gimmicky, then ‘deliver’ on a second album that demonstrates progress, we will ensure that by their third album, we will grant them Alternative Tenure–our gift to them which includes ‘guaranteed coverage’ of releases/tour dates/miscellaneous tidbits, minimal negative/attacking coverage of your brand, and the promise to band that our website will link to the website that is selling their album for years to come.

Wondering if a major label/marketing team will see the appeal of Beach House, and attempt to turn her/them into Feist 2.0 + bro who plays guitar and has an interesting drum machine in a suitcase. Wonder if this post-TingTings era will ‘embrace’ them. Seems like they wouldn’t have a poppy/ghey girly song on this album, so their chances of ‘crossoverability’ are diminished. Dark tones/vulnerability will keep their appeal strong within the indiebrocriticismsphere during 2k10.

If u had 2 bet ur entire bank account, who would yall ‘bet on’ as album of the year creator in 2k10? Do u buy the theory that critics need 2 ‘pick something new 2 seem fresh’, or will they just have predictable favourites that demonstrate their unwillingness to move forward into our modern era. Is Ratatat the ‘wild card’ in the 2k10 album of the year race?

/////////

missing u.

Srsly tho… do yall feel like Ed Droste’s twitter suicide is the indie equivalent of Heath Ledger’s murder/suicide, Michael Jackson’s death, or Miley Cyrus’ internet suicide?

In this picture, u see Edward Droste (lead singer of the band Grizzly Bear), along with a series of bros on a screen. Even though this chill session was happening in real life, Ed Droste also facilitated this same relationship on the internet with thousands of followers on the popular social networking site ‘twitter.com.’ Over the past year, @EdwardDroste became one of the most beloved alternative celebrities on twitter.

It made me sad to learn that Edward Droste committed suicide. Not in real life, but on the internet, by deactivating his twitter account. Even though he had thousands of followers ready 2 listen to his every word, he decided that being an alternative celebrity schmoozing with ‘the common man’ was not worth it.

I wonder what ‘put him over the top.’ Wonder if too many fans tweeted vicious things @ him. Or if too many music bloggers and music criticism bros gushed @ him. Wonder if he got @ed too many ‘put me on the guest lists.’ Wonder if he got tired of the popular music blog pitchfork ‘exploiting’ his tweets for meme-able content.

It’s kinda weird reading that now… It makes me wonder what went wrong in his metaphorical digipet/gigapet.

I’ll never forget the time @EdwardDroste twitpic-ed a sweet picture with Feist on a meaningful rollercoaster, then ‘tons of music blogs meme-d that shit.’

Wondering if the people that he was supposed to be connecting with/sharing life with were ultimately the same ppl who forced him to metaphorically ‘off himself.’

Worried that if Edward Droste isn’t there to ‘officially endorse’ buzzbands, many of the world’s top music bloggers won’t know what they are supposed 2 like. Have heard that Neon Indian only got ‘mainstream indie’ acceptance’ after Ed Droste endorsed the buzzband on his twitter.

Sometimes I wonder what I’d be like if I could be a twitter celeb. I feel like I would mainly tweet about ‘cool shit I was doing’ (including cool places/buying cool shit) but also make sure to have a lot of conversations with other famous/interesting people.

I remember 1 time I made a post saying that Miley Cyrus and tweens are ‘too immature’ for the internet+social media+ twitter, since they aren’t socially developed/ready 2 handle real life… Sorta wondering if high level alternative celebs are ‘too mature’ for twitter.

Is it better for indie/alt celebs to have excessive internet presences, or should they just have an ‘epic album’ every year that ’speaks 4 itself’? Wondering if indie fans are ‘more annoying’ than mainstream tween fans. Wondering if the mp3blogosphere is ‘too intense’ for a relevant indie artist to live in for more than 2 months.

Edward Droste (1982-2009)
a Eulogy
Edward Droste, creator and CEO of the popular indie band Grizzly Bear, committed suicide in November of 2009. He is survived by Victoria Legrand, lead singer of the band Beach House. She has vowed to avenge his death by claiming Pitchfork’s album of the year in 2010. Ed has three surviving bandmates, Daniel Rossen, Chris Bear, and Chris Taylor. They have decided to dissolve Grizzly Bear, and continue performing as ‘The Department of Eagles.’ In 10-20 years, they will consider using a CGI replacement EDro to make ‘mad bank’ on the reunion circuit. Edward was always known to throw down a solid meme, and was one of the initial supporters of the chillwave movement. In 2 short months, Edward would have found out that Grizzly Bear’s 2009 album Veckatimest was controversially voted the #1 album of the year after a voter fraud scandal in the Pitchfork offices.

What alt celeb internet-user would yall be most sad abt committing eSuicide?
Which alt celeb should get on the twitter 2 share his/her memes?

I want to work at a place that has a ‘chill zone’/'recreational room.’ Seems like I cold really @relax in this @break_space. Maybe I could read a magazine there, or perhaps sit on my laptop and read tech blogs.

Would also do a lot of ’serious work’, like uploading tweets, twitpics, and even creating hyperlinks. Might ‘get serious’ in a conference call at a long table.

Even though I would be ‘assigned to a cubicle’, it wouldn’t feel as demeaning as a cubicle in a worthless, generic company. Would connect with my coworkers, and wouldn’t feel bad about my progressive web browsing/timewasting. I feel like my boss would understand that ‘general web browsing’ creates a happy, productive employee.

I have heard that Twitter has ‘mad funding.’ Hope this means that there is a breakroom loaded with miscellaneous pastries + CLIF bars + etc.

Defs gonna take advantage of the ‘fully loaded’ refrigerator. Gonna drink Cokes until my teeth ‘fucking rot.’ Hope I don’t get reprimanded for ‘draining’ the food budget…

Might make some meaningful arts and crafts inspired by my employer.

Definitely going to push to get a DJ station installed in the recreation center.

Going to try to take my DJ career to the next level by utilizing ‘trending topics’/

Gonna try to ‘get flirty’ with my female boss, teaching her how to ‘crossfade’ some songs together, and ‘beat match.’ Going to stand behind her, and put my hands on her waist, encouraging her to bounce to the beat of the music.

Just want 2 innovate the world…
Just want 2 innovate ‘communication’…
Just want 2 be ‘myself’ and get paid 4 it….
Want 2 be ‘more than just a resource’…

Just need a workplace 2 call home…

What is ur dream job?
What web 2.0/web 1.0/web 3.0 company would u want 2 work 4?
Does the twitter HQ effectively use space to inspire their employees?
Should all employers be required to provide free food + drink?
WTF is a ‘401K’?
Should I move to ‘Silicon Valley’ and start a microblogging community/real-time search pyramid scheme?
Is it better to be employed or unemployed?
Do u think they are allowed 2 snort blow/addy at work at Twitter, LLC?
Should twitter install ‘parental controls’ for tween twitter users?

Previous ‘memorable’ post about ur perfect career
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2009/05/my-jobcareer-does-not-align-with-my-true-personal-brand.html

I recently saw Kria Tare-Brekkan’s new LP cover, and wondered what it was all about. Appears to be a concept album based on the popular female topic of fluid in the uterus.

Felt confused, since I am a bro, and from what I understand, I don’t even have a uterus. It seems like it might be an indie album directed towards ‘the female demographic’, perhaps ages 25-45. Sorta like the popular television series ‘Sex and the City.’ For those of yall who didn’t take sex-ed [via conservative private education/middle-american public school], here is where the uterus is located.

Went ahead and did some research to attempt to find out ‘why a woman would have water in her uterus.’

Feel worried. Thought uterus water might mean that ‘life’ was being cultivated, but it seems like it might be a legitimate health concern. Maybe this is going to be a ‘dark’ female album, as opposed to the light-hearted conceptual fluff that tons of female indie artists ‘put out.’ Seems like we are growing up, and the music ‘we’ listen to has tons of ‘adult themes’? Maybe life isn’t about ‘partying’/'being free’ in 2k10… Just want to be involved in a conceptual union with a human who I love.

Do u think people will take me seriously as an AnCo fan if I ‘overcompensate’ with interest in an AnCo auxilary band/wife?

Is Uterus Water the new ‘Horchata‘?

///what fluid will be ‘big in 2k10′?

Do u think it would be sweet to play a video game with these scenarios?

• driving a UHAUL with a bomb up to a federal building and ‘blowing that shit up’
• going on a serial killer type of spree where u rape/murder/bury bodies beneath ur house
• flying planes into buildings
• backpack bombing public areas
• shooting up a school and having 2 kill over 50% of the students
• trying to ignite a bomb on a commercial airliner

I wonder if video games are ‘better than ever.’ Maybe this is the type of stuff that all humans want 2 do, but now we finally have a realm where it is safe 2 do it.

Maybe all humans want the same things.  Maybe we just want 2 cum at all costs.

Just want a room full of vaginas to make love to.

Need a way to take out my tween angst.

So many different video games. Wonder which 1 I would be if I ‘loved video games.’ Feel like I might either be a tween who plays a Nintendo DS, and has digital friends/pets/possessions in a simulated world, or maybe just an old person who plays Wii to battle Alzheimer’s/depression/arthritis/diabetes.

Wish more video games brought humans 2gether, instead of promoting the killage of humans.

Want to connect with my local retirement community scene, coming together, celebrating our last years on Earth.

Feeling confused. At the beginning of this post, I thought video games were terrible for humanity, but then by the end of my internet research, I determined that there are positive uses for video game simulated technology. I feel like we need to promote human connections, but it would also be acceptable to round up the major threats to society, and allow them to get most of their life experiences in a simulated version of a violent reality.

It seems like if we programmed some sort of violent video game that took 40-100 years to beat, we could really save a lot of communities/international relations. Just want 2 live forever, and eliminate violence.

Not sure abt video games.
Do yall know of any video games that are safe/violent?
Are video games a ‘waste of time’?
Do u know if we could build some sort of system where we plug human brains into a hyper-reality, but actually use their body heat to create the energy that powers the computers that run our society?
Are video games ‘the master art’ since they combine all elements of modern art?

Previous Video Game Coverage
Game Boy Necklace Blipster….
Beatles Rock Band = ghey
Landing in the Hudson River video game

Flag burning alts,
What are you trying to prove?
Burning Old Glory over your coal-powered BBQ pit
If only u knew how beautiful our great country was
If only u knew abt those men who died 4 u in wars
If only u remembered what they taught u in American History (X)

Many Americans have ‘come 2gether as 1′, uniting around our coloured President’s 1st year in office
but others still continue to rebel
continue to laugh with their bros
as 50 stars & 50 stripes burn {like a candle in the wind [via Eltons Johnson]}

If only BBQ pits were ‘regulated’
and we could ensure that humans only burned animal-based foods on them
I can imagine how America feels, since Carles was once the victim of a metaphorical product burning.

Shame on any alt who BBQs the American flag
Shame on any alt who burns a war movie, such as ‘Platoon’, ‘Saving Private Ryan’, or ‘In the Army Now.’
Shame on any alt who thinks that this is good for ‘our scene.’
////worried about the ‘national media’ writing a piece about how ‘hipsters hate america and have flag burning parties’

Wonder if it is still ‘alt’ 2 h8 America, or if it is chill to <3 America.
Felt confused after I some of my high school ex-bros etched a swastika on a local golf course, mashed up with Obama.

Might open up an online tshirt boutique, kinda like how people can <3 NY.

Might get buzzed and watch a zany comedy about 3 Americans who enlist, get deployed 2 Iraq, but accidentally end up in Mexico and think that the 'fucking beaners' are the 'Iraqi Savages.'

God Bless America
Support our Troops
(Sorta missin George W. Bush. Worried Obama wasn’t the right man 4 the job.)

Remember the time those alts dressed up as ‘the twin towers’ [via 9-11]?
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/09/seen-any-possibly-inappropriate-costumes-lately.html

Hope this isn’t a metaphor.

(worried that the PBR brand will get tied to this scandal)

I love my son. He truly is the mirror image of me. It’s kinda weird how kids are so impressionable… sorta reminds me of consumers… Maybe kids and consumers have the same kind of brain… all of us have so many wants and needs, and maybe products really can fulfill us/make us happy. Srsly though… u should see his iPod… we have a lot of the same pop-electro sensibilities, but also an appreciation of indie conceptual ballads.

I feel like I might buy these Daft Punk dolls for my son. I never really let him watch traditional kid programming (crap like Sesame Street, Muppets, Dora The Explorer, etc). Mainly just put art films/indie movies ‘on repeat’ in his play room DVD player. He absolutely loves the hit film Electroma. I don’t really think it is healthy for him to identify with characters that every other kid on the planet has identified with for the past 20+ years. I want him to be a pure alternative spirit (This is why I made his mother birth him in a pool of Sparks while listening to Animal Collective’s hit album “Sung Tongs”).

I want my son to have a ’special’ Christmas, and not just because it is Christmas and kids ‘get kewl shit.’ I need my son to have a truly unique Christmas that he will remember forever. I am considering ‘booking’ a relevant buzzband to play a few of their hit songs when he comes down the stairs on Xmas morning. Might also commission some sort of mp3 to be created by Sufjan Stevens.

////beginning 2 brainstorm my xmas list
////what do u want 4 xmas?
///worried about getting 2 many iTunes gift cards from relatives who don’t ‘get’ me

Previous Lil Alt Coverage
I am the littlest alt
Should I buy a lil alt?
Lil Alt beer holder
Lil Alt human accessory
The First Lil Alt

However, WashedOutBro is ‘chilling’ on his honeymoon with his wife. He is only accessible to the woman that he loves.

I wonder if ‘having a wife/serious GF’ makes you a better artist. Like you can focus on your craft, instead of seeking out rewards [via tugjobs] from entry-level alt fan girls at every stop on your North American tour. I feel like we could call this theory the AnCo Relationship Theory. All three members of Animal Collective are in ’serious relationships/marriages’ (some with kids). It seems like they have only become ‘mad relevant/successful’ since they have found people who probably give them the space and support system that they need to be ‘artists.’

It’s kinda weird how Washed Out ‘gave up on alt celeb perks’ before his touring/entire career had even taken off. Do u think he will begin 2 regret ‘what could have been’, or will he be happy with his decision since it will allow him to ‘truly chill’ for the rest of his life?

Maybe the chillwave genre is more about ‘moving forward with family values’ as opposed to ‘escapism’ [via chilling]. Maybe chillwave is more about ‘chilling with a wife’ as opposed to ‘chilling with a group of bros.’ Maybe chillwave will help the former altbros of electro begin to transition into adult life.

What would do if u were in a budding hype-band? Would u ‘use it to get alternative sex’? Would u try to marry some1 who ‘knew u before u were an alt celeb’? Would u try to marry some1 who ‘only loved u because of ur status as an alt celeb’? Were Ben Gibbard + Zooey Deschanel married for ‘public relations/marketing’ purposes?

When u become a buzzband, so many ppl who u don’t know ‘want something from u.’ Maybe u just need some1 who wants/likes/loves u for u, even if you weren’t a buzzworthy, monetizable artist.

See unwatermarked photo here.

(wonder how much pitchfork paid for these exclusive wedding photos. wonder when an alternative website will pay for baby photos. Can’t believe the alt blogosphere has entered the paying for wedding/baby photo meme era.)

Wondering if Panda Bear ‘invented’ chillwave back before we even knew it…

[MP3]
Panda Bear Untitled (eventually AnCo’s Guy’s Eyes)

I really want to do just what my body wants to
I really want to do just what my body needs to
I really want to show to my girl that I want her (and I do)
I really want to show to my girl that I need her (and I do)
If I could just hold all the thoughts in my head and just keep them for you
If I could just purge all the urges that I have and keep them for you
I really want to show to my girl that I need her
I keep it locked right now

Need her
-Panda Bear/Animal Collective

//////feeling it all around
////maybe being alt famous/artistically relevant is not a gateway to a meaningful/sex-filled life…
////maybe u need to ’shack up’ with some1 before u r ’successful.’
////LoVe iS a HiGhWaY

Wondering what the future of music videos will be in 2k10. Do people ‘really care’ about watching a lil video on a tiny portion of their computer screen? Will indie labels still ‘bankroll’ ‘that shit’, or will they say ‘we encourage you to find a friend/group of hopeful college students who will do this video for free’? Do people really care about music videos by new bands, or do music videos only really ‘work’ for already-established bands?

I just watched the video for Girls - Lust For Life Hardcore XXX Edit, and it seemed to maybe shed some light on ‘what we can expect in the future’ when it comes to music videos within the indiesphere. ‘NSFW’

This video is ‘pornography’, I think. Feel like it is supposed to ’shock’ outlets into blogging about it, but there might also be another agenda. Maybe the Girlsbros are trying to say ‘indie rock fans are fggts’ since they utilized two homosexual males ‘rollin around bein HarveyMilky 2 gether.’ Feeling a little bit sad that they created this video gimmick not for the betterment of the indie scene, but because they wanted to create a ’search engine optimized meme’ that got a ton of porn traffic.

In 2k10, will we see Animal College – “Song Title” Lesbian XXX Cum on Tits Scissoring Edit?
Will we see the Arcade Fire – “Song title” Twink Hardcore Gay Sex Bear Anal Dirty Sanchez XXX Edit?
Will we see Vampire Weekend – “Horchata” bukake milf big titted whore 3some XXX edit?
Will we see Washed Out – “Song Title” Real Amateur Barely Legal Fucking XXX edit?
What porn-themed music video do u think is most likely to be made in 2k10?

Wondering if 2k10 is going to be all about ‘cock microphones.’ Will all indie bands utilize a penis as a microphone, or will they stick with traditional microphone technologies?

Do u think that female indie stars will utilize pee pee mics?
Do u think that ‘being into indie’ means that ur a lil bit ghey?
Do u ever wish that u just had a sun tan/pizza/bottle of wine/miscellaneous lil gifts described in lyrics by GIRLS?
Do u have a lust 4 life/blogs/indiebands/______?
What will be the purpose of music videos in the year 2k12?