Photo via thechillerwhale

Flag burning alts,
What are you trying to prove?
Burning Old Glory over your coal-powered BBQ pit
If only u knew how beautiful our great country was
If only u knew abt those men who died 4 u in wars
If only u remembered what they taught u in American History (X)

Many Americans have 'come 2gether as 1', uniting around our coloured President's 1st year in office
but others still continue to rebel
continue to laugh with their bros
as 50 stars & 50 stripes burn {like a candle in the wind [via Eltons Johnson]}

If only BBQ pits were 'regulated'
and we could ensure that humans only burned animal-based foods on them
I can imagine how America feels, since Carles was once the victim of a metaphorical product burning.

Shame on any alt who BBQs the American flag
Shame on any alt who burns a war movie, such as 'Platoon', 'Saving Private Ryan', or 'In the Army Now.'
Shame on any alt who thinks that this is good for 'our scene.'
////worried about the 'national media' writing a piece about how 'hipsters hate america and have flag burning parties'

Wonder if it is still 'alt' 2 h8 America, or if it is chill to <3 America.
Felt confused after I some of my high school ex-bros etched a swastika on a local golf course, mashed up with Obama.

Might open up an online tshirt boutique, kinda like how people can <3 NY.

Might get buzzed and watch a zany comedy about 3 Americans who enlist, get deployed 2 Iraq, but accidentally end up in Mexico and think that the 'fucking beaners' are the 'Iraqi Savages.'

God Bless America
Support our Troops
(Sorta missin George W. Bush. Worried Obama wasn't the right man 4 the job.)

Remember the time those alts dressed up as 'the twin towers' [via 9-11]?
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/09/seen-any-possibly-inappropriate-costumes-lately.html

Hope this isn't a metaphor.

(worried that the PBR brand will get tied to this scandal)

I spent 4th of July 'getting fucking hammered'--drinking beer, chilling by a man made lake in my 'rich friend's' lake house, and looking at girls' 'sweet racks' in bikinis. We rode jetskis, and other 'mad absurd shit' like that. Eventually I put on the album Strawberry Jam by ANCO just so that we could hear the song 'Fireworks.'

I stared into the bonfire that we started, and thought about life. Not just in the way that I start to think about life when I listen to conceptualcore music, but more about just all of the opportunities I have. Not just because my parents are wealthy, but just the opportunity to have this lifestyle. I'm really grateful 4 being an American. I feel different from 'my generation' because I 'get' that America is 'bad ass', instead of just being one of those people who 'pretends America sucks' just to seem liberal.

Photo via the big picture

Feels weird that my generation was 'defined by 9/11.' I feel like that was more of something that I felt 'entitled to be affected by' as opposed to something that 'lit a fire under my ass/inspired me to unite for the greater good of my country.' Feel like maybe I might have been different if I was 'drafted' to fight in Vietnam/WWII/etc. Might 'appreciate my country more.' Sometimes I just wish I had 'something 2 fight for.'

Sorta wish I lived in Iran, or possibly a 'shitty South American country' where some sort of revolution/Civil War was happening. Feels like I would have 'a real reason' 2 use twitter, like to organize people for protests.

Feels weird that America is 'in the shitter' and China is better than us at everything now, and our 'dollar' doesn't 'mean' as much as it used to, but I still feel 'better than ever.' Feel like I 'take everything 4 granted. I just want to fight in a war, and kill a foreigner. I want to take control of my life, and prove to this land that I was born in that I deserve to be a part of it. I don't want to stand around indie rock festivals for the rest of my life. I think my life could be more meaningful if I saw the world, and also fought for the lives' of millions of people.

This 4th of July, I realized that I want America to go to war soon, so that I am not part of a generation defined by the internet + 9/11 + 'social networks.' I want 2 die fighting in the Final_War_of_Mankind. This will be our legacy.

'We can be heros...just 1 day...'
-Jakob Dylan, The Wallflowers

God has Blessed America.

'I would die 4 u.'
-Prince

This is the last chance our generation has to 'rebrand' itself. We must goto war before 2011.

I was looking at pictures of hotties, and then I 'got kinda pissed.' I hadn't felt an emotion in such a long time. Had been feeling 'numb' and shit. But then got 'enraged.'

Saw these two laggards laying around on my flag. This is America. This is our flag.

Photos via Bad Kitties

I feel 'fucking enraged' that some1 would deface my flag like that. I feel like this is what people in Iraq and Iran do whenever George W. Bush makes bad foreign policty.

It rlly offends me 2 see some super model/it-girl wearing our flag as a muu muu to a meaningful music festival. I know that fashion is metaphorical, but I don't think u should be allowed 2 wear a flag-shirt unless ur American, and unless it is [via Old Navy].

srsly think that this is a metaphor for the economie. Feel like young people are 'lazy' and 'don't give a shit about the economie.' This is like Generation Y, hangin out, layin around on Old Glory.

I think that the British flag might actually be a 'fashion statement.'

Sort of scared that the South will rise again [via Radical Christian bros who buy guns at Walmart]

I think it's kewl that even 'the dark side' of the world is a lil bit nationalistic. Think that we should limit their levels of 'patriotism' so that it doesn't cause terrorism.

Yall. I've been feeling really down lately. Just like 'fuck everything' and feelings like that. I decided that if u don't care about any thing, ur life will never be meaningful. Even though it is cliched, u have 2 FEEL something. U can't just go through life thinking that everything is a big joke. U have 2 take stuff seriously so that u don't implode.

It's okay to take stupid stuff seriously. Sometimes that makes life fun. Think I'm gonna change my ways and rally around America/God/bad ass mp3s/ 'the scene'.
What do yall believe in? What do yall do 2 get out of ruts?

[Photo by lastnitesparty]

God Bless The HRO

by CRLS

(to the tune of "God Bless the USA")

If tomorrow all the things were gone,
I’d kinda worked for all my life/went to design school 4.
And I had to start again, (transfer colleges)
with just my lil alt and my entry level alt GF.
I’d thank my lucky stars,
to be livin here today.
‘Cause the electro bolt flag still stands for altdom,
and mnstrms can’t take that away.

And I’m proud to be an Alt,
where at least I know my mind is free. (from corporate bullsht)
And I wont forget the electrowarsoldiers who died,
who gave that right to me.

And I gladly stand up,
next to you and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land,
God bless the Alt.S.A.

From the blogs on the hypemachine,
to the douchey clubs of LA.
Across the party pix HTML templates,
From meme to viral meme.

From Seattle down to Austin,
and New York to L.A.
Well there's authenticAlt in every American heart,
and its time we stand and say.

That I’m proud to be an AltBro/FGGT/authenticAlt/Altbag,
where at least I know I’m free (spirited/liberal).
And I wont forget the blipsters/AZNs who died,
who gave that right to me.

And I gladly stand up,
next to u and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land,
God bless the Alt.S.A.

And I’m proud to be and Alternative member of society,
where at least I know I’m differentiated.
And I wont forget the cool/aloof dads who died,
who gave that right to me (via inheritance).

And I gladly stand up,
next to you and defend my personal brand still today.
‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this blog,
God bless the HRO.

xxxxxxxxxxxx
MORE TITTIES AFTER THE JUMP