Not sure 'who I am' but getting a better idea of 'who I want 2 b." My ideal version of who I want 2 b involves some sort of implementation of man bangs/a helmet-type of haircut. Whenever I see a keut girl with a set of bangs, I wonder why more bros can't implement them. Not gonna be 'afraid' any more. Gonna make sure that I 'follow my dreams' and activate my lookbook account.
All I ever wanted
was a browl cut
& some1 2 'love' me
& a 5-5-5 deal from Dominos
& extra dipping sauce
& an unlimited supply of office supplies
& a chance to write the sequel to "Office Space"
& a chance to write an episode of "The South Park"
& a chance to make my 'parents' understand my alt lifestyle
& a chance to break free of my social class
& the opportunity to get paid for 'lookin at kewl stuff on the internet'
& a lifetime contract with Apple so that they send me a new lappy whenever a new1 comes out
& a highly coveted gmail invite
& man bangs
& express myself
What do u want from 'life'?
"Don't be afraid 2 dream." -HROs Theme of 2k9
Previous Browl Cut
I want to 'get back to my roots' as a trendhunting blog, but ever since my post on AnCo and my podcast, I've just been wondering 'what i'm supposed 2 do with my life/bloglife?' //help
[Photo by The Cobrasnake]
When I grow up into the alt that I will one day be, I want to have a cut of hair in the shape of a spacious mixing bowl, with a well-defined plane of man bangs. (Sorry yall--still just trying 2 trendhunt a lot in 2k9. Not sure if I'm going to convert my progressive 1999 Caesar cut into a bowl cut just yet).
This bro is me.
This browl cut is me.
The bowl on my head is my hair.
These are my man bangs--they are functional
/// keeping the bowl out of my eyes.
/// and my metaphorical 'head' held 'high.'
XX BONUS PHOTOGRAPHER BRO XX
I am a photographer bro
in a sea of alts
to capture 4evr
While I don't believe in G-d
or an afterlife
I kind of believe in souls
because I capture something when I take pictures
Learned how to hack the web
and build a site
that is web 1.0
making it more authentic than web 2.0 bullshit
These are my dreams
to one day become a relevant photographer
and pix of my bffs
with a valuable site
that people fly me to 'cover'
In 10 years, you will look back on my website
and it will be kind of like a relevant cultural museum
the graveyard that is myspace
"BANG MULLETS: BIG IN 2k10?"
-Carles in the year 2k9 writing in the HRO circa 2k8.1 tone
A lot of ppl tell me 'Carles--the party pic thing is s00 old. Find a new gimmick cuz ur just ripping off _______.' These people do not understand the deep level of sociocultural analysis that HIPSTER RUNOFF provides on a daily basis. I will be the first to admit that there is more to life than partying, perfect alternative breasts, and 'snark blogs'--however, every1 needs a gimmick.
Without a gimmick, life is a journey without a goal. (goals = personal gimmicks)
Life is not easy. 'Meaning' is not auto-assigned upon birth.
You have to find it. You have to seek it out. You cannot be afraid of failure.
Because one day, you will walk into a bathroom and find a keut girl 'hangin out' waiting for u 2 swoon her/suckle on her meaning-filled teet.
This is a metaphor. There's more to photography than just taking digipix of keut/interesting/controversial nouns. What does this picture represent 2 u?
[Photos by LNP]
As yall know, 70% of the world's most innovative/zany trends from from the Land of AZNS (Asia). Trends travel across the land bridge to California and Eastern Europe, eventually making their way to Middle America/mainstreamerdom within 3 years. Just wanted 2 take a look at what AZNs have been wearing & predict which trends will reach the Mexicalt population in 5 years.
Trend 1: Protect Urself From Dirty Air
As yall know, there is a lot of noise and air pollution in our world. AZNs have a lifespan that is 200% longer than white & black ppl's natural life--they take better care of themselves than we do [via only eating fish + noodles + rice]. The AZNs are beginning to mix fashion with health safety by wearing these protective masks. They also banned fastfood in Japan after seeing the hit mockumentary Super Size Me: Fast Food Nation.
Trend 2: Bangs Which Impair ur vision [via bowl cut]/critters around ur neck
I think that bangs which impair ur vision might be big in 2k9. Bangs are theoretically functional. They 'keep hair out of ur eyes' and help to 'frame ur face.' I think taking a little bit of that functionality away might help bangs stay around forever. AZNs 'get' where engineering, design, and personal branding come 2gether as one. In addition, AZNs will no longer use gigapets/Tamagachis in 2k9. They will have 'real' pets that they can wear. These real pets will be controllable through iPod Nanos.
Trend 3: AZNs who look like this //Where the Wild Things Are
I am not sure if I will still be attracted to women if they morph into neon creatures from the hit children's book 'Where the Wild Things Are.' Not sure if I support these AZNs and their zany personal brands. h8 neon azn beast glam rockers.
[Photos by StyleSightings]
But srsly yall... after we rebuilt Japan post-nuclear bomb WWII, should we have given it a new name?
Something like 'California Pt 2' or 'Broville' or 'Gizmodo' or 'TechCrunchville' or 'The Land of Gigapets' or 'Trend City USA'?
[Photo by Appeal2theEye]
I was looking a a fotoweblog, and I noticed a man who looked like he was from the future. He was wearing a bear shirt, which represent the post-electro/indie world, where we no longer listen 2 bands. Instead, we will all have favourite animals, and listen to zany songs which are constructed by samples of animal noises. (Noah Lennox, a.k.a. Panda Bear, has been successful because he is a metaphorical land bridge between the present and the future of music.) In 2k9, our 'clubs' will be replaced with microZoos.
But I think these bangs r kute. Whenever I see a girl with bangs that are 'a lil bit sloppy and unkempt', it makes me think that they have character because they aren't interested in narcissistic stuff. They just love being free spirited, and into things that were kool 2 years ago. Even though they couldn't afford a haircut session [via a hair design studio], they are still able to achieve an aesthetic which might make them even more authentic than a 'real hairstyle.' It kinda reminds me of girls who are 'poor but semi-pretty' and just trying to make their way in a consumeristic alternative society. Kinda weird how lower-middle-classers, middle-classers, and upper-middle-classers can all 'fit in' in their own unique way in alternative society.
Wish my parents made a lil bit more so that I could buy a few more personal branding tools.
Yall. I h8 iceland. h8 their free spirited educational system that produces zanyCore OutOfTouchWithReality people. S0 tired of when people who 'live in lala land' are given a platform to talk about important things like technology, television, and the human condition.
After the election, I'm really just reEvaluating everything in my life. Kind of weird now that we have a new president. Feel kinda 'liberated' but not 'too free spirited.' Maybe Bjork is right. Maybe I could learn a lot from her. Does n e1 have BarryObama's gmail address?
I remember when I wanted 2 move 2 iceland to 'get away' from all of the social bullshit in my local social economy. Now that we have a new Prez, I'm not so sure. Hope he helps me cope with the loss of Heath.
XX BONUS LIL BJORK XX
Did Bjork have keut bangs as a kid?
Yall, remember when HRO used to be about finding the kutest bangs in the world, instead of alt-breasts?
[Photo by Preggers Goldfish]
This trio of banged triplets reminds me that life isn't all about finding the perfect alt breasts. Even though you see kute bangs every day if you live in an authentic setting, we often take them for granted. We always want what we can't have--alt breasts in our moufs.
Anyways, I really want to 'get back to my roots' with HRO 2.0.
Remember the twins with bangs?
Remember when I wondered which female AltCeleb had the best bangs?
Finding authenticity = coming to terms with ur past. Love all yall for supporting me & my quest for self awareness + the perfect alternative _______.
Is it still cool to assume that European women have hairy arm pits, or is that stereotype dead? Did hairy armpits die when EuroDisney invaded France? I know hairy pits used to be a widely accepted generalization, but I just want to make sure to update my stereotype files if things have changed. I would feel comfortable thinking that '20 year old vegan bisexual females who listen to a lot of feminist Icelandic freak folk' are the new girls with hairy arm pits, or whatever other subgenre of females. I just want to be true to myself and be true to our evolving world.
Sidenote: When a girl has bad bangs, it reminds me of 'the girl with the poor parents in 2nd grade whose parents didn't want to pay for her haircut, but periodically gave her bangs a chopping with some utility scissors.' IS THERE A NEW STEREOTYPE WHEN IT COMES TO GIRLS WITH BAD BANGS?
I just want to know more about the world. We're all so different, and we're all so the same...
I was pleasuring myself while looking at the popular street fashion blog, The Face Hunter, and I this girl really got my attention.
I really like the way her bangs are longer than any other section of her hair. It's kute. She could have gone for the straight-forward bowl, but she took it to another level.
I don't know much about fashion or retail, but I also just adore her black smock, which was probably part of the Spring Collection by SuperCuts.
Will I ever find a girl with the perfect bangs?
I think I might be more into kute twins with bangs than kute AZNs with bangs now.
Aren't the chances of having two alternative twins extremely low? Isn't it usually one mainstream twin, and one twin who decides to be alt since they can't be mainstream?
P0ST M0RE TW1N 0N TW1N.
[Twin Photography by Last Night's Partie]
1. March 18th - "Reality Check" released in the United States
2. March 10th - "Love No Single"
3. April/May - USA + MEXIC0 TOUR
We already got a taste of this Remix by Delorean in the Teenagers' US tour video, and the MP3 is now available for the general blog public. I'd say it's probably my favourite remix of The Teenagers since the SLUTTT rmx. What are your favourite Teens RMXs?
xx BONUS xx
PIC OF SOKO AND LADYHAWKE FROM THE TEENS FLICKR ACCNT
Whose bangs do u like more?
xx BREAKING NEWS xx
MICHAEL GOT A NEW HAIRCUT
Do you miss his curls? Or is he still dreamy?
YELLE: Her Music is Almost as Well-crafted as her Bangs
"Ce Jeu" Remixes are the new "Drugs In My Body" Remixes are the new "D.A.N.C.E" Remixes are the new ______ remixes, etc etc.
However, Neon Coyote's RMX of Yelle's "Ce Jeu" is more of a 10 minute minimix of the song. There's a lot of interesting/fun/creative parts in the song that could be the anchor of mixtapes for months to come.
Neon Coyote = Blogville Sweethearts.
Neon Coyote's Myspace
DL More Neon Coyote at Tuftsmania Schlog
DL More "Ce Jeu" RMXes at Yelle's Myspace Blog
Soko: Better Bangs than Uffie?
Karen O = Bangs + AZN = _______
a) sexiest when professionally styled
b) sexiest when you cut them yourself
c) UGLY AND STUPID, AND JUST FOR CUNTS WHO WANT ATTENTION
d) _______________________ (Free Response)
Are you ever up late wondering who has the best bangs in the music world?
Some one else?
2008 will be dedicated to settling the Great Bang Debate.
After analyzing our site statistics, I realized that posts attract more visitors and comments when they feature BANGS and AZNs.
Richie♥Kannibal is a myspace sensation worth blogging about.
Working the bandana, sporting some frosted bangs.
As simple as u see this face, this name, my style : Memorize it ! Mr.Richie Kannibal is the new kid in the block and is ready to stay; it kid in town and just 17 years old; Yep you can say I’m the Fucking Star I’m Sorry That’s Hell 4 u. You all have heard all around town about this kid, ‘everywhere “Richie” put a feet he is the show’. [Look out your window my sunshine's all around]. So when you see me coming you better back down. I may be young but I’m not stupid, I’m not a quitter; sorry its not my fault that you all wear a uniform so you wont be ignored. If you talk shit, I won’t even pay attention. Your words and actions are only a desperate act for attention, instead I let myself be known for my maturity, personality and heart. Remember haters: Karma's A Bitch!. All those rumors only make me Stronger, Mature, Intelligent, Incomparable and more well-known. I am not a super human I am a … simple teenager but Unique at the same time I make my style u don't have to label me. I just want 2 live like is the last day in my life [Just have fun and smile]. I love to make new friends and just be my self around then, One of my hobbies is to party till 5am with them. I am now in my last year of high school; I want to study Fashion Design, and keep modeling to follow in growing in the world of the fashion. I can be your best friend and your worst enemy...So don’t mess with ‘Richie. One adjective you should all have to learn -h u m b le- don’t know what it means? It means stepping off other people's life and minding your own business, not bragging, because one thing is for sure today you're spitting all over my name, but tomorrow you will scream it.
Richie is serious about a drama-free life. Sporting the brass knuckles.
A fresh take on the traditional hoodie.
Sporting his crew.
Gettin his Hello Kitty on.
Don't forget to send him a Friend Request. He's not a band. Just a myspace worth blogging about.
When Zooey Deschanel's Bangs Died, So Did A Piece of All of Us.
There used to be a time when 'indie' meant promise.
The promise of a more authentic tomorrow
But the real driving force was the commercial interest in the 'indie' aesthetic
At one point in time, every1 thought that 'indie' was the next 'mainstream'
In reality, 'indie' was just a passing trend
The current iteration of 'alt' culture
with a consumer friendly 'angle'
The entire genre existed in order 2 write the score of smart phone commercials
There was once a time when girls cut their bangs
making them 'indie'
There was a time when Zooey Deschanel's career was at a crossroads
What 'angle' could she implement to take advantage
of the then-booming indie movie and music scene?
Cut ur bangs
Find a dude who plays guitar
(marry him/start a band with him)
Start taking press photos in ur graveyard.
This was who she 'was'
She was 500 days of summer
She was the 'She' of The Shims
She was #TheNewGirlOnFox
All bc of her bangs
I guess 'bangs' are 'over'
It's time 2 move on
Time to find the new aesthetic personal identity to implement
in order to seem 'now'
The awkward phase
where ur still 'growing out ur bangs'
Sometimes makes u feel gross and unbeautiful
but u know u have 2 do it
they are slowly dying
but still dying.
There is nothing left here 2 commercialize.
The aesthetic is ubiquitous
In 3-10 years, sorority girls with throw parties themed 'indie hipster'
this is truly the end
When the vultures have flown away
2 eat something else's bones
When Zooey Deschanel's Bangs Died, So Did A Piece of All of Us.
DoEs ZoZo LoOk GoOd, BB?!?
Does n e 1 remember 'bangs'?
Girls used 2 cut them
so their hair sat in a straight line on their forehead.
Some girls use bangs 2 cover up their 'large ass foreheads'
Others do it bc it is a relevant alt trend.
I miss the days
with beautiful alt bangs
Does n e 1 know if Michelle Obama is bringing them back?
Or does this mean that they are hella lamestream?
Does the 1st lady 'rock those effing bangs HARD'?
Or does she look like a 2kLate ass bitch?
Is she an overrated fashion icon?
Man Bangs used 2 be pretty alt.
Maybe only manbangs are still alt
This bro seems pretty hardXcore
but probably needs a bang trim
Grimes sported the 'baby bangs'
But also sorta a lamestream sideshave
Alt AZNs sorta used 2 vibe on some bangs/bowl cuts
Are bangs 'effing back'?
Does n e 1 know if BANGS are relevant or not?
Are #sideshaves relevant?
Are 'alt bangs' now 'vintage'?
If 'bangs' are back, do u know if RECORD HATS are coming back?
Taylor Swift honestly sings THE BEST songs. I honestly used to sit in the bleachers, and I had a crush on this guy, but he picked a fake girl, but she was admittedly prettier than me :-(
I NEED a makeover! I usually go to SuperCuts and take a picture of a celeb that I cut out from a magazine! I'm gonna HAVE TO print this 1 out and take it in to my hairstylist, who is actually a M2F (male2female) transvestite. He has THE BEST hair, he was DEFANATELY supposed to be a woman. I wish I had his body because he is way more of a woman than me. One time I was in a relaish with a man who actually wanted to be a woman, and it made me feel really unpretty, as if I made him feel like less of a man.
He became a woman and we became GREAT gal pals, but then she turned into a TOTAL BITCH and stole my next BF! Needless to say, my confidence and sexual identity have been very undefined and worthless for the better part of the last 10 years.
TayTay is AMAZING and she is DEFANATELY the best crossover success story since Leeighan Rhymes.
I am gonna get bangs soon! Last time I gave myself bangs, I accidentally cut off my forehead, giving myself a lil lobotomy :-(
Feist is arguably the most successful female artist of all time. Not only did her positive popwave vibes soothe the psyche of a mainstream nation, but her bangs made her a bonafide QT. Her latest album 'Metals' was pretty 'meh', and no1 really VIBED to it except her, but she recently played Kimmel, and u gotta admit... her bangs look BANGIN!
The weird thing about bangs is that when a girl has 'super perfect bangs', u start to wonder if they are hiding something... a huge forehead...acne... a huge crater on their forehead...
Feist also seems to be staying innovative by wearing a 'graduation tassel earring.' Seems youthful, maybe an updated version of those girls who wear one feather earring so that they look 'tribal' or something.
Does Feist look good?
Do u kare abt her?
Does she need to become 'more Lana Del Rey'-y?
Did her last album tank?
Does she still have the best bangs in indie?
Is it time to buzz-euthanize Feist?
R u gonna turn your graduation tassel into an earring?
Photo by Weird Magic dot biz
If there's one thing I love, it's girls with bangs. If there's another thing I love, it is the altbaguettes from Dirty Projectors. If there's one more thing that I love, it's alt girls with premium curly hair. Angel Deradoorian has got it all. Here she is showing off her PERFECTLY EXECUTED CURLY BANGS, but also that she is able to leave the walls of the controversial Dirty Projector Compound. I am happy for her freedom, and I wish her nothing but the best. I wonder if she is still 'canoodling' with Avey Tare. They both deserve 2 be happie.
Is Angel ur fave DP?
R u amazed by the execution of her curly bangs?
Does Angel have a better 'mop of curls' than Vicki LeGrand?
Should she 'go solo' for good, or does she need to stick around for one more album cycle and 'start a fight'?
Can she become bigger than St. Vincent/Vicki LeGrand/LykkeLi?
Do u believe in The Emancipation of the Dirty Projector Alt Baguettes?
Alan Palomo is the mastermind behind Neon Indian, but when the band is touring, he enlists the aid of a keut alt synth player named Leanne Macomber. Neon Indian is planning 2 release LP2 soon and he has been 'hitting the road' 2 beta test new material. I'm sure n e thing would sound good if I got 2 watch such a fierce set of bangs playing them.
Do u <3 her bangs?
Are bangs still 'in'?
Cann Leanne Macomber reach Vicki LeGrand status, or is she just an indie role player?
Do u prefer when backing band members are 'douchey looking bros' or 'qt altbaguettes'?
Did Dave Longstreth hire 2 many QTs 2 join his band, or can u nvr have enough hot alt females in ur buzzband?
Gaga BB! U look good! Ur bangs are black but ur hair is blonde??!?
What a FUNKY combanation that only YOU would think of....
That's what I love about Gaga... she is an iNDAVIDUAL. Loves it.
Honestly I don't like bangs that much. I prefer a Jennifer Aniston haircut with a few pretty layers. Honestly bangs remind me of when my family put me up for adoption for a few years while my mom went to rehab, and I ended up living in a cult in rural Montana for 2 years. They never cut my hair, except for my bangs to keep the hair out of my face as I read the Bible. I actually had a bf there, but it all ended when my parents got back on track and decided to rescue me. It turns out if I had lived there forever, I would have become one of many wives of the cults leader, and probably would have had 10 children by now....Part of me wonders if I would be happier.
Gaga LOOKS GOOD and I lovelovelove her.
In case yall didn't know, 'bangs' are a relevant alternative hair fashion trend for alternative females. Bangs come in multiple forms, enabling women to look all keut and potentially alt. However, some girls can't grow bangs, or they don't want to take the huge risk of cutting them and looking 'dumb.' This is why Urban Outfitters created 'clip on bangs.'
It seems like these 'clip on bangs' are 4 girls who want bangs, but don't want to risk cutting their hair. Maybe I will get a pair. From what I heard, tons of African American women already wear 'clip on hair' and miscellaneous 'weaves', so maybe this is just another example of how alternative culture 'steals' from pre-existing culture.
* 100% human hair
* Hand wash
* Web exclusive
Simple clip-on bangs made with 100% natural human hair, so you can curl, cut, color and style just like your own hair. Now you can have super chic blunt bangs without the commitment of cutting your own hair. This fabulous fringe looks real, feels real and stays put! The hair should be washed as infrequently as possible or when you notice that the hair appears dull or acquires an odor. If you are wearing the hair all day, every day, you can wash them after 3-4 wearings.
Do u wear clip on hair?
Is clip on hair 'mad sexy' or 'mad tacky'?
Are hair extensions for 'tacky white ppl'/people who think that they are 'famous'?
Are clip on bangs going 2 be the next relevant alt trend?
R u going to buy these bangs and 'remix them [via chopped and screwed]'?
Should I just start wearing a series of wigs that have different alt hair styles?
Is Urban Outfitters just 'selling this shit' to 'go viral' on 'alt blogs'?
Should I start a hair farm?
Does n e 1 know where I can find a Donation Station for Urban Outfitters hair reselling?
Is clip on hair 'mad tacky'?
Do u miss the search for the perfect alternative bangs? [link]
Miss u bang era
It seems as if Bebe Zeva 'cut her bangs.'
Do u think she totes looks kewt? Do u <3 her new hair brand?
Are bangs 'in' in 2k12?
Does Bebe Zeva still have ur <3?
Do u <3 or h8 Beeb Zeev?
Who has the greatest alt bangs of all time?