Barrack Obama | Hipster Runoff

Barrack Obama

‘I’ve always wanted a President who I could have a beer with & talk abt life.’ -some bro asshole


While googling 'how to fix the economy', I recently stumbled across a picture of President Barry Obama drinking a beer on the sidelines of an NBA/NFL game. A lot of people have always said that they want a chill President who they can chill with, and be bros. However, I don't think I want this at all. I want a President who takes his job seriously. I want a President who is trying to make things better, instead of getting hammied while drinking Bud Light / Sparks.

Is n e 1 else 'outraged' that we let this man into office just for him to prove to be 'just happy to be there.' Ever since he's been in office, all he ever does is vlog and twitter. Don't think he's making any of the CHANGE he promised to us or to the world. A lot of people would say that we want a President who we can 'relate 2', but I don't think that's reasonable. I want a President who is '100% business.'

I'm kinda worried about stuff like terrorism, Chinese ppl, business ethics, CEO bonuses, lynching Osama Bin Laden, nationalizing a stringent methodology of racial profiling, sending Michael Phelps 2 jail, pardoning OJ, and making sure that every home in America has high speed internet.

Just kinda pisses me off 2 see this bro chilling so hard, like nothing even matters.

ughh... s00 d0ne with politix.

Is n e 1 else 'outraged'? Or does seeing Obama drink a beer make him seem 'more personable'? R yall worried that some terrorist is gonna buy season tickets to the Washington Wizards just to 'get his assassinate on'?

Is Kanye West a more significant role model for young, black men than Barry Obama?


I remember after the election, African American talking heads were 'totally pumped' that African American kids and tweens would no longer want to be rappers--they would want to be Presidents & CEOs & investment bankers & entrepreneurs for social change.

However, I don't think they really thought about the impact of Kanye "Paradigm Shifter" West, and how he is changing the way that all kids look at 'what makes rap cool.' Of course the ideals of Barry Obama are cooler than 'Gangsta+Violent Rap' and 'Having sex with big bootied women' rap, but I don't know if it is cooler than the consumer core ideals that Kanye West brings to the table.

I know that every rapper has a God complex, claiming that they are the 'best thing since sliced bread.' However, no1 has come even close to presenting a case quite like Kanye West. His desire to be 'the best' is unmatched, kind of like a rich tween whose parents let them get whatever they want at the local mall. This is way kewler+identifiable to white people who 'listen to rap' than any rap themes from the past.

This post may or may not be saying that Kanye West is the modern, consumer-core version of Uncle Tom.

Or is it a simple argument to call ever mildly successful African American in the arts+entertainment industry an 'Uncle Tom' because if he achieves critical or mainstream success, it will involve 'convincing white people that you are praise-worthy'? Or are they more like sambos?

Just trying to talk about race issues, yall. Sorry if this is 'too touchy 4 yall', but maybe u should go back to living ur anonymous life on the internet.

Does n e 1 know what happened to Barrack Obama? Is he 'not as cool as we thought' after all? Did we make a mistake?

who is yalls fave African American role model (besides Will Smith)? (Besides Michael Vick/OJ Simpson / Chris Brown)

Liveblogging from the Inauguration

Hey yall...
blogging from my T-mobile g1 phone at Obammy's inauguration. srry about any spelling errors or weird ofrmatting. just try to make it through this post bc this post is a part of history.

n e ways. it's s000 fckng crowded, yall. I just saw some1 'take a crap' in the swimming pool thingy. Not enough port-o-potties. I'm starving. there aren't really enough options for my recently implemented vegan lifestyle.

n e ways, I recently started a startup clothing & apparel company. We make memorabilia for events + communities. Kinda like when ur pro sports team makes the playoffs, or when a President gets elected--that kind of stuff.

But yea... brought some lawn chairs and some 'brews' so that I could 'be totally fucked up' when Obama goes 'on stage.' I don't really know how to handle public events like this, so I usually just pretend that they are a music festival. This means that I just try to get 'blackout drunk' and attempt to 'make out' with as many broads as possible. Sux that it is so cold & girls can't 'show off their bods in form fitting outfits.' (might take acid later)

n e ways... I think I have a pretty good view. the arena has IMAX-quality sound. Gonna sound like an AnCo concert.

does n e 1 know where there are any 'blog house after parties' at the inaug? Are yall going to the HypeMachine+Pitchfork Ball starring Will.I.Am?

Hopefully there is a Buzzband Stimulus package in 2k10, or else all of the music magazines are 'gonna go under' kinda like Best Buy did just last week. Worried that I might lose my job at the Mac kiosk within a local Best Buy. FYI it's like 'working at a Mac Store' except without a lot of the pressure of actually being an Apple employee.

n e ways.. Barry is about to talk/rap, so I g2g.

_______________________
sent from my iPhone Nano

Martin Luther King Day


Happy Martin Luther King Day, yall (to all yall blipsters and non-blips). I had a great day off and spent some time using wifi in Central Park. It was kinda meaningful, but my battery eventually died and I 'got a lil depressed' about how wireless internet is 'forever' but battery power is not 'forever.' Hope Apple solves this problem in the next Macbook.

Moving forward, I just wanted to talk about what a great guy MLK was. He seemed like a pretty passionate bro. Think he learned about viral marketing/community organizing/political activism from Gandhi. Unfortunately, these tactics would not work in the modern world. U have to be able to 'use the internet' 2 convey 'what ur all about' by building websites/socialnetworks/twitters/other gimmick web communication services.

I sort of wonder if Barry Obama 'could have made it' before the internet existed to proliferate memes. I'm just saying, yall. MLK JR is a true bro. Not sure if Obama will be able to go from 'being a viral meme' to actually 'leading a nation.' If yall think about it, it would kind of be like electing Tay Zonday 2 office. U need to be more than just an 'internet celebrity' to lead our world. There's more to life than Choco Rain Peanut Butt Jelly Time vlog candy vimeo youtube memes.

Sorry 2 get political on yall, just want u 2 realize that the internet has changed the way that we consume the world. Hope that our 'economy' gets better. What do yall HOPE 4?
SPARKS?

or OBAMMY?

Should we still be 'hoping' now that the campaign is over, or do we still need 2 'hope'? Just wondering. Kinda confused. :-(
I "feel stupid." - an insecure person

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PLAYLIST AFTER THE JUMP

Has my life improved since Obama took office?


I saw this meaningful, pro-GHEYs altbro cuddling with Obama, and it made me a lil sad & reflective. Now that Obammy is chilling in the Oval Office, it's like I have nothing to look forward to. Maybe it means I've 'grown up a lil', but I just don't look forward 2 anything n e more. Am I depressed?

When I was a pre-alt, and an entry level meaningfulcore bro, I used to look forward to things. Movie releases, new album releases, 'shows'/concerts, going back home 4 the holidays to prove that my life was more meaningful than the other people I went to high school with who hadn't found meaningful existences. These days, I feel like there's nothing to look forward to. Maybe I'm scared of growing up. Am I 'losing my edge?'

I used to have a Rushmore calendar in my room that I would highlight important days of album/movie releases. Never 4get the day that I lined up at midnight to see the Royal Tenenbaums at 2 pm the next day. Or the Meaningful Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind ( a movie about 4getting about the quirky girl who u r s0 0bsessed with, but every moderately alt guy wants a piece of her ass). To me, new indie films are kind of like Star Wars/Lord of the Rings/Matrix/Beethoven releases.

//Just trying 2 figure out 'The Science of Sleep' ///
//Closing my eyes// Opening My Heart ( <3 )

Do yall know 'what the deal' with Obammy is? Why does he want 2 'go viral' s0 bad? Did he not have a 'traditional post-y2k childhood'? Are these lil vlogs the only way to reach the tweens of America who will be critical in his failed re-election in 2012?

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[via zany Saturday Night Live sketches that blogs feel like they have to 'recap']


Kinda scared. Read in a blog magazine that Barry Obama is a smoker. Does that mean he does blow off his blackberry?

///PART OF THE 2K8 ELECTION NEVER DIES.
R.I.P. GEORGE 'vonnegut' BUSH

Are French Robots Allowed 2 Vote?


Does n e 1 know how elections work? I have been reading news websites and there is one coming up. Does ne 1 know how to 'create.my.own.vote'? I'm not sure if there is some sort of iPhone app that I am supposed to add to my Blackberry, or something like that. Also, I am friends with a few robots & creatures from the electro jungle. Are they allowed to vote if they weren't born in the United States?

Does the election happen every year?
Do the candidates ever release mp3s that get posted on hypemachine?
Is every blog on the internet supposed 2 'endorse some1' kinda like a newspaper?
How does this stuff work, yall?

I'm also kinda worried about what will happen 2 the world after a 'new bro' is elected? Do u remember the personality type of your fellow classmates who 'wanted to be a politician' when they grew up? Have yall ever chilled with politicians in real life. Are they like a (High School Class President)^10000 ?

Hope the w0rld doesn't end. :-( Just want 2 beLIEve.

Daft Punk

DJ, Buzzband

Daft Punk is a French House band that 'peaked' with discovery.

Read more>>>>

Should I blog more about politix?


Have yall heard about this new election thingy? Is it true that u get to vote online now, and that even nonAmericans are allowed 2 vote? Do yall want the world 2 be a better place? Are they really going to be able to verify Myspace accounts if they use the MyspaceVote platform? Will MyspaceVote be more significant than MyspaceMusic?


Did yall hear that we have to pay for some banks that ran out of money bc poor people have been stealing it to buy houses that they haven't worked hard enough 4? Why couldn't they just live in apartments 4 the rest of their lives'? Why/How are they(we) gonna pay 4 this?? Are they gonna take the money out of my bank account, or will I pay with monthly payments, or can I use paypal? s00 confused. Wish we didn't have 2 use money and we just exchanged goods and services without 'currency.'

N e ways...back2 politix....
People always talk about 'getting the young people out to vote', but they don't really provide much incentive. I think with this new 1Vote=1GiftCard system, kids will finally start to 'get off the couch' and start voting.

I wish politicians would talk about stuff that I care about, such as the same couple of bands over and over. Or maybe even the pursuit of altness. Or our mainstream world, and the influence of altness over it.

XX BONUS TECHNICAL QUESTION XX

Does n e 1 know how I can change my blog font 2 be one of these?

Not very good at computers. These are the only fonts that can carry the weight of my words. Just wanna express myself to yall.

Alt Suicide / Alt Depression: The World's New Mainstream Epidemic?

"What does it feel like 2 sleep forever?" -an Alt in Crisis

[Image by LindsaysDiet]
Life is hard. Don't listen to what other free-spirited people at music festivals tell you. If you are some1 who actually contributes to ur national economy, then chances are u face some stress in ur life. If ur some1 who actively contributes to the alternative social economy, then ur life is probably twice as hard as a regular mainstreamer. U have a whole new set of problems that mainstreamers can't even fathom.

This is the alt struggle.

The alt struggle is there for a reason. It's to make u a better alt. We've all had times where we think about giving up. Never give up. Your alt life is too valuable. Alternative suicide is bad for your alternative community. Even if you are an unmemorable alt who wears American Appy and has less than 10 tagged photos on a social network, just the fact that you have a default userpic with a MacBook camera makes you relevant.

I remember when a bunch of AZNs tried to commit suicide. People are getting stressed about the bursting electroBubble. Alts don't know what to do during this time of war when the government is rationing electricity to fight in the electro war.

All I can say is 'never give up.' Pharmacists are working on a solution to all of our problems, yall. Things will be perfect within the next 10 years--just give it time. Put on your electroHeadphones and watch meaningful electroDocumentaries. Never forget that your unique personal brand is important to your Alternative Social Economy.

What is causing alt-depression?
1) Mainstreamers wearing too much American Appy, making alts feel less unique
2) altBro saturation of major metropolitan areas
3) post-ElectroWar Stress Syndrome
4) Yellow Fever (2ManyAZNs)
5) Entry Level Alts making AuthenticAlts feel less authentic
6) The American Election
7) The War with Iraq
8) The War with Iran
9) Australian Stress Syndrome
10) No new Justice album for the past 200 blog years
11) Popular 'alt' blogs posting too many Alice Glass pix
12) Agyness Deyn not being fun any more since she started hammying Alby Hammy Jr.
13) Choose Ur Own Response yallsies

XX WHAT MUSIC WILL SOUND LIKE WHEN THE ENTIRE WORLD IS DEPRESSED XX

In the future, all male singers will be bald, play piano ballads, and wear Abercrombie beaniez.

BTW...who are yall voting for in the election thingy? Can nonAmericans vote or is it the whole world?

[Image via FFFFound]
I heard Barry Obama got some 17 year old girl preggers or something, but I just read headlines from message boards and don't rlly pay attention. What's going on in politix, yall? Should I blog about it? It seems zanier than a party pix site with 25% n00d gingers.

Why is it is cool 2 vote.

This article was written by Grandpappy McWillersby, contributor to Huffington Post Old Foagies, Slate.com, Buzzfeed.com/SeniorCitizen and HIPSTER RUNOFF.

Hello my fellow Americans,

My name is Bill Willersby, and I am a citizen of the United States of America. I have seen a lot of changes in my day. When I was a young man, we used to call women who showed off a little bit of calf 'floozies.' Now, I turn on the TV and see more than I bargained for during the 5 am local newscast. Some probably see me moving slow in the super market and think I'm not with the times. That I think that M&M is a candy, not a rapper. But i'm 'with it.' I'm 'cool.' I've been known to talk some jive, and even my granddaughter introduced me to my first frappucino frozen ice milkshake. I tell ya, it tasted just like a custard freeze from down at the malt shoppe right next to the soda fountain pharmacy that I used to work at.

I tell ya, kids these days don't care about the times. They care more about the latest iPod nano, but don't realize that they can be a part of history by voting. How about I put it in young peoples words. Voting can be cool, here's why:

1. You might have an iPhone that has apps. What if I told you that voting was a lot like an app because you press a button and that's all it takes. Apps are cool. Voting is cool too.

2. The candidates are like stores down at the shopping mall. All you have to do is pick one that represents you. Some kids shop at Woolworth's. Others shop at Montgomery Ward. I'm a Sears man myself, but some kids can't help but shop at the Macy's and Foley's.

3. Gas prices. When I was a kid, gas cost about a nickel to fill up a tank. These days, you gotta pay at least two $20 bills to fill up the old station wagon. It shouldn't be that way. Go out and vote, kids.

4. Milk prices. When I was a kid, a jug of milk cost about a penny. These days, you gotta pay at least two $5 bills to fill up the old ice box. It shouldn't be that way. Go out and vote, kids.

5. God wants you to vote, and god is a cool guy. My grandsons go to a Bible camp every summer. One of the counselors has long hair. At first, I wasn't too keen on his looks, but when I heard his first sermon to the teen congregation, I understood that God takes many different forms, even the body of a hippie skater pot head Bob Marley lovin' sonbitch. I had the church drug test him, and he came back negative.

6. Jobs to the Chinamen--our economy is struggling. We cannot let those chinamen steal our economy. When I was a boy, we defeated the communist and the Nazis. I have no doubt that if you vote, we can defeat the chinamens, too.

7. The Middle East - I say we nuke em. Fuck em. Voting on that can be real cool, like one of those videogames that my grandson, Jacob, plays all day. I swear, he could direct that nuke right into downtown Iran and that would mean peace in the middle east.

8. Rappers and famous people vote -- Get out and rock the vote like your favorite super heroes and rock stars. People like Mick Jagger, Pete Best, and the cast of the Golden Girls all vote.

9. Gays--my old Uncle Gary was a gay. True story.

10. J-Z. I know who J-Z is. He is a rapper, rhyming over the rap beats. I'm not behind the times like I look. Get out and vote like J-Z.

I fought in the war for this country. You can take it from me, voting is cool, or my name isn't Bill Willersby. Voting can be cool and fun, so why don't you get one of your frozen yogurt ice creams when you're done and cool off with that. :-)

Rock the Vote!

While I do end all of my columns with my catchphrase "God Bless America." Today, I especially mean it.

Goodnight every one, and in the words of me:
God Bless America.


This article was written by Grandpappy McWillersby, contributor to Huffington Post Old Foagies, Slate.com, Buzzfeed.com/SeniorCitizen and HIPSTER RUNOFF.

A Complete Guide to Voting in the 2012 Presidential Election [Candidate Breakdown]

Why should I vote?
Voting is an important experience 2 connect with the lamestream masses. U walk into some booth and believe that u 'make a difference', when u actually don't make a difference. Ppl spend so much time talking abt politics as if it is 'their whole identity', then voting is just like taking a dump. You're never going to remember what it looks like in the toilet after you flush it away.

How do u vote?
You go to a place and they had iPads there and u tap them. Ur results aren't actually stored.

What is the Electoral College?
A small liberal arts school in Vermont where the votes are counted.

Is my vote more valuable if i live in a 'swing state'?
Yes.

What is the Middle Class?

The Middle Class is the 'rebranding' of poverty. Basically, ppl who think that they are 'doing just fine, workin hard, and contributing positively to society', when they might as well just quit on life and get free government handouts.

Which candidate is 'more alt'?
Barry Obama 'went lamestream' when every1 was all like #HOPE, yall. Mitt Romney is some white dude who hates poors, so in a way, he is trying to 'gentrify' America by kicking the poors and coloreds out.

Which candidate is more likely to send a nuclear weapon to Iran or North Korea?
I remember when George W. Bush was in office, that Iranian dude was all like 'an unchill bro.' Every1 was hating on him for trying to vibe out to some enriched uranium, but now every1 h8s wars and no1 remembers that bro. Except there is some civil war shit goin down in Syria, but every1 is all like 'NOT MY PROBLEM' this time, but I guess there's not that much oil there, so we don't have 2 fight there 2 lower gas prices for midsized SUVs.

What candidate would u rather have a cold 1 with?
Barry Obama seems like the bro that 'milks a beer', 'pretends to have a convo with u', and ur supposed to be like 'Dude, he's actually a really cool, chill guy!' But most ppl could see thru him, see that he is just tired of upholding this charade, and just waiting to get out of office so he can go 'radical', divorce his family, and just sorta focus on building a hip hop empire.

Mitt Romney would probably get blackout drunk on a rare bourbon, order some prostitutes on the 'company card', and let you in on his disgusting lifestyle. That seems pretty chill to me. U would know u were bros 4evr while you were both digging a hole/yachting out to sea in order to dispose of a dead prostitute.

Which candidate supports the Nacho vs Burrito controversy?
Burritos became this 'thing' in the post-chipotle era, and every1 is all like 'wooo! I love Burritos! so much food inside of this wrappywrap!' but nachos never go their own restaurant chains, so people take them for granted. Both of them are probably into burritos, but nachos are sorta 3rd Party Values, because Dems and Reps are all like 'we're not gonna balance the budget with all those chips, cheese, and toppings', but if they realized that we could increase the burrito tax by 0.04%, it would generate enough to get our troops out of Afghanistan and focus on the war on terror within our own borders.

What is Obamacare?
Obamacare is healthcare for humans who don't deserve it unless they pay for it or have a 'real job.'

Will we get social security?
No.

Why does Mitt Romney hate poors and coloreds?
Mitt Romney is one of those honkies who

Where do our taxes go?
To allow the poors to buy cheap food, filling up their carts, and bottlenecking the grocery store with their 3 liter jugs of soda on sale.


Who is Paul Ryan and why is he such a honky ass tool bag?
Paul Ryan is like that dude in high school who acted all 'smart' and 'big man on campus' when he was just this dumb ass in regulars classes, going to Bible Study and fingering his girlfriend in his Ford F-150. D-bags like this motherfucker should be middle management at a pyramid scheme contracting company and drinking Bud Lights while watching football. Anyways, he's the type of dude who resonates with honkies who wish they were him. One time he went to this soup kitchen for a 'photo op', and even though they were closed, he was all like, "lemme pretend I'm helping for like 5 min then I'll be out of ur way." I guess that's pretty alt, though. No1 cool actually does 'required community service hours.' U just look for ways to make it look like u did ur time. I guess he is just like u and me after all.

Do we really want Joe Biden as our next president?
I think they are getting Hillary Clinton back to reignite the 'women who wear pants' vote.

What happened 2 Sarah Palin? Wasn't she a meme?
She turned out to be 'too meme', and was blacklisted from the party.

Do u really want to be one of those ppl who talks abt politics?

No. They need 2 'get a life' or something. Maybe they can focus on city/state governmental issues so they can see a more immediate impact in their lives.

Did Obama 'lose his meme appeal'?
I don't know, some losers still 'get off' to internet memes like it is 2k6-2k8.

Have u ever looked thru a binder full of women?
I once considered getting a Russian Mail Order bride to keep my apartment clean for the duration of my 18 month lease, but then was worried that I would order a defective one.

Do food stamps even exist any more? Like, is it a stamp or like what?
They actually get a 'debit card' and go 2 the grocery store and can buy basically whatever they want. It is sorta like when u go 2 the grocery store, but instead, they aren't paying 4 it.

Should rich ppl be taxed more?
Some ppl say that they work harder and earn more, but middleclass/poors are all like "ugh! We're poor! It matters more 2 us!"

How can we create more jobs?
Open more fast food restaurants and then every1 gets free food.

Is it realistic for Obama to create more jobs in the renewable energy sector?
'The economy' is a huge lie. In China, they overdeveloped their country and have tons of high rise condos that were built by 'basically slaves' in order to manipulate the algorithm that calculates GDP. It's all just a sham, so u should just do whatever it takes to make it seem like we are 'moving forward', then leave the mess to the other party when the country 'wants a change'.

Should the President cut FEMA?
It's weird to think that we are just learning how to deal with natural disasters of epic proportions. Soon, no1 will live on the coast any more because shit will get fucked up every year. Until then, FEMA has 2 exist. It is only a matter of time before every part of the Gult Coast is destroyed.

Should I vote early?
I wish there was late voting bc I nvr do anything on time.

Why do the candidates pretend to 'respect eachother'?
I wish they openly hated eachother instead of acting like 'the bigger person' for the camera. Such a lame process. Need more fighting and firebreathing instead of ppl 'acting' so that body language and media pundit talking heads can be all like "______ won the debate!" even though neither of the candidates said anything of value.

Should the 2 party system be done away with?
Nah, ppl will get confused bc they are stupid. No1 really needs 2 look into the issues.

Should I move away from America if the other candidate wins?
Yeah, stop being a pussie and do it. See how ur life is without fast food, affordable family dining chains, and Costco.

So...Who should I vote 4?
Just write urself in and be like, "LOL! I am funnie! hehe. But srsly, I think the president is paid $400k/year and that would be pretty chill bc I could be like "I'm not doin shit this year, dawg. Lameduckin this shit.""

Who r u voting 4?
Which candidate is more alt?
Is voting 'worth it'?
What 'matters'?
Is the middle class 'screwed'?
Do Americans deserve money 4 nothing?
Should we get another economic stimulus package so we can buy new Macbooks and HD TVs?
Is this the biggest election of our lives?
Will America exist in another 4 years?
Do u <3 America?
R u a concerned citizen?
Do u h8 when ppl are 'too kewl 2 vote' or is it a waste of time?
How can u change the world the most?

I respect our President less for participating in a viral video skit with Jimmy Fallon.


Barry...
Barry, Barry, Barry...

I remember back in the day when you used to represent HOPE. That was your THING. You got the young people excited. But now it feels like you're trying a little bit too hard to pander to the young people.

Now you're going on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon?

That guys' worse than Ellen. She'll enslave any toddler who went viral, forcing them to go viral over and over again.

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I miss the old days, when the President was an old, stiff honky. He didn't want to sing, dance, or go on an untraditional platform to bring his message to the intended audience. I wish our President was all jargon, filled with empty promises, obsessed with flexing our military muscles to the Third World. I wish our President had his finger on the button of a missile launcher that could easily wipe out our enemies AND our allies, just to get a hard on. This new guy thinks he's a real jive talker, doesn't he?

Now our President is going viral on a late night TV show? Jimmy Freaking Fallon? That guy will have a fringe indie buzzband on his show just to get 100 video embed hits from a crappy mp3 blog.

What happened to our beloved Obama? Is this how he intends to obtain 4 more years?

Now Jimmy Fallon has the President by his balls? I was vibing hard to Pressie Obama, especially after he shock and awed the eff out of Saddam in a rat hole AND killing Bin Laden. Hell, I thought you also killed Kim Jong Il, just because you were LITERALLY KILLING IT. But now he's trying to save all these kids who were too proud to go to technical college, and instead, took out massive amounts of Stafford loans at overpriced private universities because they were 'too proud' to go to community college for 2 years, then transfer to a state school?

Eff that. Cmon Obama... Ur better than that. Let the college yuppies and poors continue to get into debt. It's just part of the way our country works.

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon is the definition of amateur hour, man. Don't get me started on the Roots and that guy with the question mark as his name as the most overrated band in the world, just because they have the same job as the Chuck E Cheese robot band.

This is NOT a good campaign path, Barrack. The Republicans and our enemies will use this as fuel.

The next thing you know, you'll be getting whored up in a tiny pink dress, sitting down with a tween sensation just go go viral. Is that what you want? To be used as a little viral vessel of whoredom?

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I thought being President was about trying to change the world. Not about going viral.

I mean, cmon. What is this? Friggin amateur hour? We get it, u already went ultimate viral by winning the Election. What else is there to prove, Barry Obama?

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The next thing you know, you're 36 years old, and Ellen DeGeneres is using your body as a drug mule to smuggle viral videos in and out of the country. Is that what you want, Obama? Do you want the terrorists to think that you are being converted into a viral video mule by a TV host who is desperate to go viral and boost ratings?

R u ashamed of our President?

Mark Zuckerbro has illuminati meeting with Barry Obama and Steve Jobs

Mark Zuckerberg meets Obama
In this photograph, we see the CEO of America (Barrack Obama) and the CEO of Facebook (Mark Zuckerberg) meeting at the White House. I'm not sure what they had to talk abt. Maybe Obama needed some 'tech support' learning about privacy controls or how to tag his bros in photos. Maybe Zuckerbro has some ideas for a new age democracy where every1 just votes on issues utilizing facebook, and we don't need Congress any more, and Zuckerbro can just ride dictator waves/rig some votes.

Is 'technology'/'the internet' really a big deal that deserves national attention, or just another 'fad' that will be outdated 1 day? Are tech CEOs just 'legalized dictators'? Is Mark Zuckerbro trying 2 hard 2 be famous and control the world?

It seems like this was some sort of modern illuminati meeting, with every1 who controls the world (because the world = 'the internet')

As you can see from the photos, the star studded invitee list included Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg, Apple CEO Steve Jobs, Yahoo CEO Carol Bartz, Cisco’s CEO John Chambers, Twitter CEO Dick Costolo, Oracle CEO Larry Ellison, Netflix CEO Reed Hastings, Genentech Chairman Art Levinson; Google CEO Eric Schmidt; former state controller and venture capitalist Steve Westly Doerr, and Stanford University President John Hennessy. The event was held at Kleiner Perkins partner John Doerr’s home.

"Who the hell invited the CEO of Netflix? All he does is mail DVDs and upload mediocre movies in2 the Watch Instantly Queue." -CEOs of 'real tech companies'
Is Bill Gates 'too irrelevant' 2 be invited bc Windows/Microsoft/Bing is mad lamestream?

Seems like this was probably some sort of huge meeting to 'control the future of the world.' Here they are toasting to 'enslaving' ppl with less than 100 friends on Facebook and making them do 'data entry enslavement' 4 the rest of time.

Do u think Facebook can save our government?
Is Barry Obama trying to 'control the internet' so he can get re-elected?
Who didn't belong at this exclusive White House event?
Will Barry Obama ever 'reach out' 2 the indie community, inviting the most relevant blogs & buzzbands 2 dine with him?
Will Mark Zuckerbro 'rule the world' 1 day?

Mark Zuckerberg

Alternative Celebrity, Alternative Entrepreneur

Mark Zuckerberg is the CEO of the_facebook.com and the star of his self-directed documentary called "The Social Network."

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Some blipster makes Obama autograph his iPad


Barry Obama
My blipster idol
Makes me feel like I can do anything
Makes me feel 'equal' 2 all other human beings

transcending race
socioeconomic status
educational levels
riding the G.E.D.-wave, following my dreams

Recently purchased this sick ass iPad
Really changed the way I 'throw shit down'
Improved my workflow
Helps me 2 communicate with every1

Went to a Barry Obama event
wearing some of his 'merch'
a t-shirt with his grill on it
Wonder how much money he makes per year on 'merch sales'

Anyways...
Wanted his autograph 2 show my kids 4eaeae
but I didn't have a piece of paper
bc who the eff uses paper any more
[via 'going green']

Decided 2 pull out my iPad
Have him 'sign that shit'
Bro doesn't even need 2 use a pen
Obama looked at me, at first, perplexed
but then he was like 'this is rad. Is this an Apple iPad? I've been thinking of getting 1 of these.'

At a rally in Seattle, WA at the University of Washington, the President used the touchscreen on my iPad to give me his autograph. Secret service was leery about the idea, but they warmed up to the idea and the President thought it was cool.

He looked slightly surprised, but proceeded to use his finger to scribble on the iPad using the Adobe Ideas app.

I have a video of the event as well. This HAS to be the first time an iPad has received a Presidential autograph.

We had a 20 minute long discussion abt it
I showed him some apps, some games
Showed him how he could really help Sasha + Malia's education
by purchasing an iPad 4 the family

He vibed out hard
signed my shit
and gave me his personal email address
PimpBawlaPresident@hotmail.com

We met up later after he purchased a Paddy
and I helped him set up his mobile.me account and find the right twitter app 4 him
Obama is the best
Really embraces social media
technology
design & typography
twitter
facebook 'liking'
Webpages
Homepages
iPods
iPads
iPhones
Apple products
Wireless networks named 'linksys' or 'NETGEAR'
and other sweet ass tech shit like that.

Thanks 4 signing my shit, Barry
<3 @the_tech_blipster

Democratic Party redesigns logo to tap into the post-Obama ‘HOPE’ brand


After the election of Barrack Obama in 2002, beating George W. Bush III in one of the most heated elections of all time, Democrats have been trying hard 2 hold on to their liberal, left wing power. Many say that the power of graphic design is what got Barry Obama elected into the Presidency chair because he inspired Americans 2 align with his logo that was all about 'HOPE'. It seems like the Democratic Party has 'unveiled' a new logo / brand / corporate identity. They are probably trying 2 ride Obama waves or something because he is trying to get re-elected with all of the other Presidents in every other State in the Union Confederacy. Who are u gonna vote for for mayor/city councilman/senator / Supreme Court Jousteece?

Logos + graphic design play a huge part in my consumer decisions every day. Something abt the Taco Bell / Pizza Hut logo makes me go there for lunch every day.

Really trying 2 analyze their new logo / brand. It seems like their old brand was all about 'being a donkey' and also 'being an American.' Now their new logo is about 'being a chill, minimalist Democrat' who only really cares abt reading design blogs, sweet fonts, and tweeting with @ObamaBro.

It seems like the "O" surrounds the D to represent the omniscient presence of Barrack Obama in the context of the modern Democratic Party.

Do u think their logo design and corporate identity will inspire u 2 vote for them?
Did Obama 'revolutionize politics' with effective graphic design?
Will the Republicans come up with a new logo in Comic Sans?
Is Obama 'overrated' as a politician, leader, and graphic designer?
Is the Obama brand more relevant than the Democratic Party Brand?
Are 'independents' ruining life 4 Democrats?
When Obama takes our country 'down the shitter' in 2011, will we all join chill ass Tea Parties?

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