HIPSTER RUNOFF

While googling 'how to fix the economy', I recently stumbled across a picture of President Barry Obama drinking a beer on the sidelines of an NBA/NFL game. A lot of people have always said that they want a chill President who they can chill with, and be bros. However, I don't think I want this at all. I want a President who takes his job seriously. I want a President who is trying to make things better, instead of getting hammied while drinking Bud Light / Sparks.

Is n e 1 else 'outraged' that we let this man into office just for him to prove to be 'just happy to be there.' Ever since he's been in office, all he ever does is vlog and twitter. Don't think he's making any of the CHANGE he promised to us or to the world. A lot of people would say that we want a President who we can 'relate 2', but I don't think that's reasonable. I want a President who is '100% business.'

I'm kinda worried about stuff like terrorism, Chinese ppl, business ethics, CEO bonuses, lynching Osama Bin Laden, nationalizing a stringent methodology of racial profiling, sending Michael Phelps 2 jail, pardoning OJ, and making sure that every home in America has high speed internet.

Just kinda pisses me off 2 see this bro chilling so hard, like nothing even matters.

ughh... s00 d0ne with politix.

Is n e 1 else 'outraged'? Or does seeing Obama drink a beer make him seem 'more personable'? R yall worried that some terrorist is gonna buy season tickets to the Washington Wizards just to 'get his assassinate on'?

I remember after the election, African American talking heads were 'totally pumped' that African American kids and tweens would no longer want to be rappers--they would want to be Presidents & CEOs & investment bankers & entrepreneurs for social change.

However, I don't think they really thought about the impact of Kanye "Paradigm Shifter" West, and how he is changing the way that all kids look at 'what makes rap cool.' Of course the ideals of Barry Obama are cooler than 'Gangsta+Violent Rap' and 'Having sex with big bootied women' rap, but I don't know if it is cooler than the consumer core ideals that Kanye West brings to the table.

I know that every rapper has a God complex, claiming that they are the 'best thing since sliced bread.' However, no1 has come even close to presenting a case quite like Kanye West. His desire to be 'the best' is unmatched, kind of like a rich tween whose parents let them get whatever they want at the local mall. This is way kewler+identifiable to white people who 'listen to rap' than any rap themes from the past.

This post may or may not be saying that Kanye West is the modern, consumer-core version of Uncle Tom.

Or is it a simple argument to call ever mildly successful African American in the arts+entertainment industry an 'Uncle Tom' because if he achieves critical or mainstream success, it will involve 'convincing white people that you are praise-worthy'? Or are they more like sambos?

Just trying to talk about race issues, yall. Sorry if this is 'too touchy 4 yall', but maybe u should go back to living ur anonymous life on the internet.

Does n e 1 know what happened to Barrack Obama? Is he 'not as cool as we thought' after all? Did we make a mistake?

who is yalls fave African American role model (besides Will Smith)? (Besides Michael Vick/OJ Simpson / Chris Brown)

Kanye West

Buzzband, Alternative Celebrity

Kanye West is the famous mainstream rapper who controversially got a 10.0 from Pitchfork.

Lists: received above a 9 from Pitchfork, received a 10 from Pitchfork, rappers, designer, critical darlings, blipsters, annoying ppl, African Americans

Read more>>>>

Hey yall...
blogging from my T-mobile g1 phone at Obammy's inauguration. srry about any spelling errors or weird ofrmatting. just try to make it through this post bc this post is a part of history.

n e ways. it's s000 fckng crowded, yall. I just saw some1 'take a crap' in the swimming pool thingy. Not enough port-o-potties. I'm starving. there aren't really enough options for my recently implemented vegan lifestyle.

n e ways, I recently started a startup clothing & apparel company. We make memorabilia for events + communities. Kinda like when ur pro sports team makes the playoffs, or when a President gets elected--that kind of stuff.

But yea... brought some lawn chairs and some 'brews' so that I could 'be totally fucked up' when Obama goes 'on stage.' I don't really know how to handle public events like this, so I usually just pretend that they are a music festival. This means that I just try to get 'blackout drunk' and attempt to 'make out' with as many broads as possible. Sux that it is so cold & girls can't 'show off their bods in form fitting outfits.' (might take acid later)

n e ways... I think I have a pretty good view. the arena has IMAX-quality sound. Gonna sound like an AnCo concert.

does n e 1 know where there are any 'blog house after parties' at the inaug? Are yall going to the HypeMachine+Pitchfork Ball starring Will.I.Am?

Hopefully there is a Buzzband Stimulus package in 2k10, or else all of the music magazines are 'gonna go under' kinda like Best Buy did just last week. Worried that I might lose my job at the Mac kiosk within a local Best Buy. FYI it's like 'working at a Mac Store' except without a lot of the pressure of actually being an Apple employee.

n e ways.. Barry is about to talk/rap, so I g2g.

_______________________
sent from my iPhone Nano

Happy Martin Luther King Day, yall (to all yall blipsters and non-blips). I had a great day off and spent some time using wifi in Central Park. It was kinda meaningful, but my battery eventually died and I 'got a lil depressed' about how wireless internet is 'forever' but battery power is not 'forever.' Hope Apple solves this problem in the next Macbook.

Moving forward, I just wanted to talk about what a great guy MLK was. He seemed like a pretty passionate bro. Think he learned about viral marketing/community organizing/political activism from Gandhi. Unfortunately, these tactics would not work in the modern world. U have to be able to 'use the internet' 2 convey 'what ur all about' by building websites/socialnetworks/twitters/other gimmick web communication services.

I sort of wonder if Barry Obama 'could have made it' before the internet existed to proliferate memes. I'm just saying, yall. MLK JR is a true bro. Not sure if Obama will be able to go from 'being a viral meme' to actually 'leading a nation.' If yall think about it, it would kind of be like electing Tay Zonday 2 office. U need to be more than just an 'internet celebrity' to lead our world. There's more to life than Choco Rain Peanut Butt Jelly Time vlog candy vimeo youtube memes.

Sorry 2 get political on yall, just want u 2 realize that the internet has changed the way that we consume the world. Hope that our 'economy' gets better. What do yall HOPE 4?
SPARKS?

or OBAMMY?

Should we still be 'hoping' now that the campaign is over, or do we still need 2 'hope'? Just wondering. Kinda confused. :-(
I "feel stupid." - an insecure person

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The HIPSTER RUNOFF radio show airs Mondays at noon and again at midnight EST on Sirius XMU. Iff you’re an XM subscriber, you can listen to Blog Radio on channel 43, and Sirius subscribers can still find us on channel 26. If u really want 2 hear Carles Show, u can get a 3 day trial membership.

PLAYLIST AFTER THE JUMP

I saw this meaningful, pro-GHEYs altbro cuddling with Obama, and it made me a lil sad & reflective. Now that Obammy is chilling in the Oval Office, it's like I have nothing to look forward to. Maybe it means I've 'grown up a lil', but I just don't look forward 2 anything n e more. Am I depressed?

When I was a pre-alt, and an entry level meaningfulcore bro, I used to look forward to things. Movie releases, new album releases, 'shows'/concerts, going back home 4 the holidays to prove that my life was more meaningful than the other people I went to high school with who hadn't found meaningful existences. These days, I feel like there's nothing to look forward to. Maybe I'm scared of growing up. Am I 'losing my edge?'

I used to have a Rushmore calendar in my room that I would highlight important days of album/movie releases. Never 4get the day that I lined up at midnight to see the Royal Tenenbaums at 2 pm the next day. Or the Meaningful Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind ( a movie about 4getting about the quirky girl who u r s0 0bsessed with, but every moderately alt guy wants a piece of her ass). To me, new indie films are kind of like Star Wars/Lord of the Rings/Matrix/Beethoven releases.

//Just trying 2 figure out 'The Science of Sleep' ///
//Closing my eyes// Opening My Heart ( <3 )

Do yall know 'what the deal' with Obammy is? Why does he want 2 'go viral' s0 bad? Did he not have a 'traditional post-y2k childhood'? Are these lil vlogs the only way to reach the tweens of America who will be critical in his failed re-election in 2012?

[via zany Saturday Night Live sketches that blogs feel like they have to 'recap']

Kinda scared. Read in a blog magazine that Barry Obama is a smoker. Does that mean he does blow off his blackberry?

///PART OF THE 2K8 ELECTION NEVER DIES.
R.I.P. GEORGE 'vonnegut' BUSH

Does n e 1 know how elections work? I have been reading news websites and there is one coming up. Does ne 1 know how to 'create.my.own.vote'? I'm not sure if there is some sort of iPhone app that I am supposed to add to my Blackberry, or something like that. Also, I am friends with a few robots & creatures from the electro jungle. Are they allowed to vote if they weren't born in the United States?

Does the election happen every year?
Do the candidates ever release mp3s that get posted on hypemachine?
Is every blog on the internet supposed 2 'endorse some1' kinda like a newspaper?
How does this stuff work, yall?

I'm also kinda worried about what will happen 2 the world after a 'new bro' is elected? Do u remember the personality type of your fellow classmates who 'wanted to be a politician' when they grew up? Have yall ever chilled with politicians in real life. Are they like a (High School Class President)^10000 ?

Hope the w0rld doesn't end. :-( Just want 2 beLIEve.

Daft Punk

DJ, Buzzband

Daft Punk is a French House band that 'peaked' with discovery.

Lists: past their prime, French, electro, critical darlings, alternative tenure

Read more>>>>

Have yall heard about this new election thingy? Is it true that u get to vote online now, and that even nonAmericans are allowed 2 vote? Do yall want the world 2 be a better place? Are they really going to be able to verify Myspace accounts if they use the MyspaceVote platform? Will MyspaceVote be more significant than MyspaceMusic?

Did yall hear that we have to pay for some banks that ran out of money bc poor people have been stealing it to buy houses that they haven't worked hard enough 4? Why couldn't they just live in apartments 4 the rest of their lives'? Why/How are they(we) gonna pay 4 this?? Are they gonna take the money out of my bank account, or will I pay with monthly payments, or can I use paypal? s00 confused. Wish we didn't have 2 use money and we just exchanged goods and services without 'currency.'

N e ways...back2 politix....
People always talk about 'getting the young people out to vote', but they don't really provide much incentive. I think with this new 1Vote=1GiftCard system, kids will finally start to 'get off the couch' and start voting.

I wish politicians would talk about stuff that I care about, such as the same couple of bands over and over. Or maybe even the pursuit of altness. Or our mainstream world, and the influence of altness over it.

XX BONUS TECHNICAL QUESTION XX
Does n e 1 know how I can change my blog font 2 be one of these?

Not very good at computers. These are the only fonts that can carry the weight of my words. Just wanna express myself to yall.

"What does it feel like 2 sleep forever?" -an Alt in Crisis

[Image by LindsaysDiet]
Life is hard. Don't listen to what other free-spirited people at music festivals tell you. If you are some1 who actually contributes to ur national economy, then chances are u face some stress in ur life. If ur some1 who actively contributes to the alternative social economy, then ur life is probably twice as hard as a regular mainstreamer. U have a whole new set of problems that mainstreamers can't even fathom.

This is the alt struggle.

The alt struggle is there for a reason. It's to make u a better alt. We've all had times where we think about giving up. Never give up. Your alt life is too valuable. Alternative suicide is bad for your alternative community. Even if you are an unmemorable alt who wears American Appy and has less than 10 tagged photos on a social network, just the fact that you have a default userpic with a MacBook camera makes you relevant.

I remember when a bunch of AZNs tried to commit suicide. People are getting stressed about the bursting electroBubble. Alts don't know what to do during this time of war when the government is rationing electricity to fight in the electro war.

All I can say is 'never give up.' Pharmacists are working on a solution to all of our problems, yall. Things will be perfect within the next 10 years--just give it time. Put on your electroHeadphones and watch meaningful electroDocumentaries. Never forget that your unique personal brand is important to your Alternative Social Economy.

What is causing alt-depression?
1) Mainstreamers wearing too much American Appy, making alts feel less unique
2) altBro saturation of major metropolitan areas
3) post-ElectroWar Stress Syndrome
4) Yellow Fever (2ManyAZNs)
5) Entry Level Alts making AuthenticAlts feel less authentic
6) The American Election
7) The War with Iraq
8) The War with Iran
9) Australian Stress Syndrome
10) No new Justice album for the past 200 blog years
11) Popular 'alt' blogs posting too many Alice Glass pix
12) Agyness Deyn not being fun any more since she started hammying Alby Hammy Jr.
13) Choose Ur Own Response yallsies

XX WHAT MUSIC WILL SOUND LIKE WHEN THE ENTIRE WORLD IS DEPRESSED XX

In the future, all male singers will be bald, play piano ballads, and wear Abercrombie beaniez.

BTW...who are yall voting for in the election thingy? Can nonAmericans vote or is it the whole world?

[Image via FFFFound]
I heard Barry Obama got some 17 year old girl preggers or something, but I just read headlines from message boards and don't rlly pay attention. What's going on in politix, yall? Should I blog about it? It seems zanier than a party pix site with 25% n00d gingers.