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Beyonce
The 2011 MTV VMAs: tons of human memes trying 2 produce memes


Did yall watch the 2011 VMAs? It is actually a relatively successful mainstream awards show because they are looking to facilitate and proliferate as many memes as possible. This year, they allowed Lady Gaga 2 dress up like a man, and basically let her roll around in her own feces on stage 'trying to be deep', just because they knew that would help them 'win' twitter.

Tons of pretty standard mainstream memes happened.
Did u watch?
Are the VMAs 'too mainstream'?
Did they 'take over' ur social media feed?
Who was 'the big winner' of the VMAs?
Did any indie bands 'go mnstrm'?

I am watching the throne, yall!

"ODD FUTURE STOLE THE SHOW AND THEY RULE THE WORLD 4EVR!" -an odd future fan after odd future does anything

Katy Perry looks hot enough 2 work at my local Chinese Food Buffet restaurant

Beyonce turned her womb child in2 a meme.

'I have 99 problems, and the common problems associated with a pregnant wife's frequent mood swings and emotional needs account for the vast majority of them.'

Lil Wayne 'sags' AND 'wears skinny pants'

Nicki Minaj looking like she rolled around on the floor of a day care center.

We will never forget how he beat the shit out of Rihanna.

Britney Spears is turned on by the Guido-wave Mexi Kevin Federline

Kanye West is happy drunk

"I'd like to thank not only God, but also Jesus" -he actually said that

Kreayshawn looking like swag ass white trash

Unfunny Black Comedian Bro of the Year

The Guy from Entourage

'Yes, my meme power might not be as strong as it used to be, but this face means I still make more money than u.'

'Check out our new website--new artist.biz' -the Good Charlotte bros

Have u lost weight, Jonah, bb??? #LeanCuisine

LAUGHING MY EFFING BUTT OFF!

Foster the People bought their suits at Mervyn's.

It's Leto Time!

The Manager at my local El Pollo Loco

Ur so classy, Miley BB! Did u get that dress at JC Penney's?

"Justin Bieber loves to motorboat my Cha-Chas!"

CONTINUE READING/MAKING FUN OF THESE ASS HOLES ->>>>>>>>

Should US troops stationed in war zones be allowed to make viral videos?
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I just watched this 'viral video' of United States troops stationed in Afghanistan doing an interpretive 'tribute' to Beyonce And Lady Gaga's hit song "Telephone." It made me feel a lot of different emotions:

  • I felt proud of America, because we invented webcams and vlog youtube video technology. Al Gore invented the internet, and without it, we couldn't have international meme sensations like Susan Boyle, William Hung, and Larry Gaggah.
  • I felt scared for our country's safety, like these military bros should be 'protecting us' or possibly searching for Osama Bin Laden and Saddam Hussein.
  • I felt angry at the military for wasting our tax dollars while our troops 'bullshitted around making viral videos.'
  • I felt angry at Osama Bin Laden and terrorism for waging a new kind of war that has no immediate end.
  • I felt happy again about viral videos, distracting me from the troubles of the modern world, giving me an escape from this 'mad world' [via Donnie Darko]

Sorta wonder if troops deserve to have 'free time.' I am the biggest post-patriot in the world, accepting the beauty in the breakdown of the American Military, but I feel worried that our troops are sending the wrong messages to our enemies. Like when troops go abroad, they aren't actually 'doing anything'--they are just sorta like a group of tweens huddled around a Macbook.

Why do u think this video 'went viral'? Do you think it made Middle Americans 'relieved' to see troops who are under stress take some time out to have fun? Do you think tweens could have done a better job with video editing technology + choreography?
Maybe mainstreamers are in2 this video because the image of soldiers are 'straight men', but these soldiers are acting all fruity. Wonder if it is funny 2 laugh at homosexual stuff.

Do u feel more 'outraged' when u see American troops making viral videos, or American troops torturing prisoners of war?
Is the US Military 'swirling down the shitter'?
Are we wasting money on telecommunication technology for troops?
Who would win in a war: the US, China, Russia, Europe, or the Iran [via nuclear weapons]?
Are terrorists gonna watch our viral videos and think we are chill bros who just wanna bro down and make youtube content?
Do u support America?
Will we ever catch Osaddam Bin Laden?
Does Colin Powell need to 'regulate' and ban troops from making viral videos with tax payer money?

The Indie Girl Voice Aesthetic Presents 'Single Ladies'--a cutesy indie interpretation of the popular song by Beyonce.

Kinda wanna throw down a bedroom studio jam and make a yewtube video 4 it.

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Sorta wish I could be reborn as a girl so that I could have the opportunity to express myself with music. I think I would start by taking piano lessons at a young age, then possibly learn the guitar. I would try my best to have a 'good voice', but eventually I would want more than a 'good voice'--I would want to have a humble, approachable voice that could fill up coffee shops and let the world know that I am a female artist worth taking seriously. I would write songs about the female experience, talking about my insecurities and failed relationships in a direct way that inspired girls to be like 'thats how i see the world, too.'

My vocal delivery would really enable me to 'make an impact' on the indie scene, appealing to girls who were just like me (independent spirits) except they are 80% more creatively worthless than me, since they wouldn't have any technical talent that would enable them to 'make something artistic.' I am not sure how to feel about music that fits into this aesthetic. It seems like the content doesn't always matter, it sort of just has to sound 'organic/stripped down' and have a kute lil girl voice on top of it. I am not sure what women want out of music. It seems like this song would have been a 'totally different type of hit' if some indie girl sang it. Guess it is better that Beyonce 'made it mainstream'?

I'm not even sure what women expect out of music. It seems obvious that the best bands are comprised of male members, but . It seems like 'all girls' (mainstream + alt + maltsream) like the same music, even if it is 'fucking terrible.' It's sort of like the television series 'Sex Inside of the City', a story that glorifies the sexual pursuits of women. Even though the show is probably 'mediocre', the fact that it is a brand that women can rally around and 'feel special' that there is a show about 'them'/their 'feelings.'

Do yall ever miss the formative stages of 'indie', back when the smokey/cutesy/vulnerably quirky female voice was 'fresh' and 'new'? Do u feel like the formula is dying, or will it live on forever?

Do u still listen to Feist/Paula Cole/Fiona Apple/Cat Powers/Sarah Maclaughlan/Jenny Lewis/The Blow?
Do women have 'terrible taste' in music, or is it just indicative of the escalated struggle for a sense of purpose in the world when u r a woman?

Remember when THE BLOW had that song 'Hey Boy' and it really 'appealed 2 all indie girls' since it was about a boy who didn't call u back? This is a 'fan video' interpretation of the song, where a girl is crushed because of the neglect she experiences from a forgettable altbro.

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Remember when that guy from the YACHT (Jona Bechtolt) 'produced' all of The Blow's songs, but then she was 'too Portland' to take the brand to the next level [via selling out and making some mad mnstrm commercial money] then he quit the Blow and they haven't been relevant since? Feel like women ruin everything/always have terrible ideas + ideals. Hard 2 empathize.

'If u _____ed it then u should have put a _____ on it.'


Beyonce BB! Is that Blue Ivy Carter, bb?

All the HATERS need to quiet down and let Beyonce have a moment of silence with her baby!

I am TIRED of the internet rumors saying that u had a fake baby. Although my womb is most likely no longer fertile, mainly because I was used as a drug mule during the early 1990s and most of the cavities of my body are toxic, I am HAPPY for u and #SeanCarter for ur newborn. I do NOT care if u purchased it from another breeder, or if you had the baby manufactured, it is UR right to have a child. This is AMERICA, dammit, and even if u want to Photoshop a baby and pretend it is real just start a media firestorm, then that is UR right.

Lord knows that I would give anything to have a child of my own, but first I would like to be married for a few years. Unfortunately, my last ex told me that I was too self-obsessed to ever have a child, and that if I brought another human life into this world, I would ruin it and it would have a bad childhood. :-(

Beyonce, U and ur BB look REAL GOOD, whether or not u invented him on photoshop! I really wanna go back to community college so I can take some design courses, learn Photoshop, and hopefully make myself more marketable 2 employers.

U've got it all Beyonce, bb! I luv LOVE LOOVE when u put ur love on top. <3

U have the BEST baby in the world!

12 Comments!!! <3




OMG! Jay-Z is the BEST bf bc he actually takes his wife out in public AND he got her pregnant. I was married to a man for a short time, but he was actually a foreigner who was just USING me to get a green card. He said he'd pay me $4000 to wed him, but then he pretended to fall in <3 with me, just to get out of paying. It turns out he SUED me in the divorce, and now I am PAYING HIM $200 / month for car insurance.

He never took me out in public, which makes me sad. I wish I was dating Justin Timberlake. He likes to go out. I'll bet he would even explain ALL the rules to me. I KNOW I would like sports, just no1 has ever explained it all 2 me . :-(

I wanna rock ur body, bb! U DEFANATELY don't need ur sexy back... u ALREADY HAVE IT!

I LOVE ARI FROM ENTORAGE. He is honestly the hottest Jew, and he LOVES his wife... but at the same time... he is VERY MEAN to that little gay azn man. I hope he grows a heart one day.

Andy Samberg is a hipster hottie, too!

OMG funny man ben Stiller! I need a man who will MAKE ME LAUGH... but he married the hottie MARSHA BRADY from the Brady Bunch. I wish I had a perfect family. Most men hate dating me because of my deep psychological issues that deal with my parents and my estranged half-siblings.

OMG! the old man from 30 Rock From the Sun! I love that show! #TeamFrenchStewart! #JasonGordonLevitt4evr!

I hope 1 day some1 takes me to a tennis tourney. I want to learn how to play! It seems like a FUN way to burn off some calories, but my calves are really swollen with waterweight, so i will probably just keep playing pingpong sitting down. :-(

Yay 4 sports! I LOVE connecting with guy interests because it makes them <3 me more.

#TeamTennis!

6 Comments!!! <3




Beyonce BB! OMFG! I love love LOVE ice cream! Waffle cone is DEFANATELY my preferred way of eating it, but sometimes a waffle bowl can be fun, too!

Yummy. Not just B BB, but also that ice cream. She looks SUPER HOT on the cover of DAZED Magazine. I am DEFANATELY gonna pick up a copy!

I am SUPER JEAL of Beyonce's BANGIN bod... how does she eat what I eat except she stays nice and thin? Share ur secrets with me! It was so emberressing to go to Golden Corral with my ex, and he would finish eating in 2 hours, but I would be there for AT LEAST 5 hours after a few trips to the dessert bar. What can I say? Desserts are my kryptonite. I would LOVE to pour soft serve on brownies and then use yummy cookies as a spoon to scoop it alllll up. Yum. They also have really good roast beef and mashed pertaters if yall ever go there! Srsly though! It's a good deal.

I was actually banned from it because I stayed there too long one day and they honestly told me that I caused them to be unprofitable. It was embarassing to get the a policeman to escort u out, even if he was a TOTAL hunk.

Beyonce is AMAZING and I love LOVe love her. She is a TRUE icon.
Kelly Rowland who? #TeamBeyonce
Jennifer Hudwho? #TeamB!

I need some dessert! Sometimes a sweet treat is the only thing that keeps me going, both physically and emotionelly.

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I love love love love love Beyonce

All the Single Ladies was MY EFFING JAM

Well she's BACK with a jam for "Run the World (Girls)". This song is AMAZING and I finally have the hope I need to get over my ex. He left me in debt, 40 lbs heavier than when I first met him, and addicted to painkillers and Reese's Pieces. I know with this song on my iPod shuffle, I am finally ready 2 hit the gym.

Beyonce LOOKS GOOD and is EFFING AMAZING.

Honestly, men do run the world, but at the same time, I would be happy if me or a woman ran my workplace. I would be way happier and maybe she would understand my needs. My boss sexually harasses me and one time told choked my throat and told me to give him 'sex with my mouth.' I don't want to get into what happened next, but I still have my job and the economy is really bad right now, so u have to do what u have to do.

:-(
girls!

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Beyonce bb! Rihanna who??? #TeamB

Jay-Z is SO LUCKY to be d8ing this bonafide sexi bb.... I honestly have loved Beyonce since Destany's Child. But at the same time, the name of the group always made me sad, because I wondered if I was the opposite of destiny's child... maybe I was 'leftover child', 'abandoned child', 'psychilogically abused child.' It sucks to not feel special and sometimes feel like i don't have a purpose to live and to want a boyfriend who likes me despite my flaws. I just want to be happy.

But Beyonce LOOKS GOOD and FIERCE and I lovelovelove her hair!

I love Billboards! In my book, they are still a GREAT way to advertise, especiallly the electronic ones!

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BB! Beyonce looks GOOD and TONED and is teaching exercise to Americas future woman. They are SOOOO LUCKY!!!! If Beyonce was MY gym teacher I would DEFANATELY have a bangin’ bod!

Beyonce proves u can LOOK GOOD while u WORK OUT! I need 2 HIT THE GYM but I need good gym clothes  Wish I could wear high heels to the gym LOL!! I LOVE LOVE LOVE HIGH HEELS that alongate your legs and make u TALLER + A FIRMER BUTT. My exBF h8ed everything I wore. He would always try to reinvigorate our love life by purchasing sexie lingerie for me, but I couldn't even fit into it. I was too big for the stretchiest elastic bands.

(Sidenote: My gym membership expires soon. Should I join a new gym so I can GET PUMPED abt my workout routine, or stay at my old gym. Hrm)

She is A TRUE INSPIRATION to single ladies everywhere!
I would LOVE to have her as my Biggest Loser Coach :-)

I honestly wish I could go back in time and start to be healthy from a young age.

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I love love love the KIDZ BOP franchise because it reminds me of my youth. I used to be in a choir, but then my mom got a second job and couldn't take me to practice, so I ended up watching a lot of TV.

I wish I could have sung on the KIDZ BOP version of a song when I was a kid. Rebecca Black who? #TeamKidzbop

My exBF used to HATE the music I played in the car. He never embraced pop music, and never embraced my interests. He only did drugs and watched sports and porn videos. Looking back, maybe he had an addiction, and that was why he lost interest in me physically. Honestly, I wish he had put a ring on it. I wish any1 would put a ring on it after the Royal Wedding

Beyonce who? This version is bttr, IMHO.

I need a husband. :-( But I'll start with a boyfriend.

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I lovelovelove the new BEYONCE video. It makes me miss 'Single Ladies', but at the same time, it is WAY BETTER.

Beyonce is a GREAT DANCER, and if I danced like that, I'll bet I could lose a lot of weight... It is funny how this takes place in a school cafeteria... I have a lot of bad memories of school cafeteria. Well, the food was really good. Sloppy joes. Chicken Nuggets, Meatloaf. Cookies galore! But maybe that's when I started over-eating because my parents were poor and I got free lunch. I was so ashamed of getting free lunch that I would eat everything in 5 minutes, then go to the line where they sold other food and eat a second lunch.

My high school boyfriend was kinda grossed out by me, and eventually we broke up.

Beyonce LOOKS GOOD.
Rihanna who?????
Bee is back! #TeamBeyonce

...I hope Jay-Z is good 2 her and never pulls a Chris Brown...

Sometimes men make me feel like I'm the only single lady in the world...

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Beyonce bb! U look good... I see a lil bit of sideboob...

She looks STRONG and CONFIDENT, showing off her skin... but u can't help but wonder if u see some signs of an implant.... If would do what she did too, just get a small, modest implant that really perks up my breasts... After I get a breast reduction for my pancake titties. :-( She does LOOK GOOD and FIERCE, though.

I could honestly never show much of my body due to a really bad previous relationship. I 100% H8 my ex . I rele thought that he loved me 4 who i was & i started feeling comfortable for once in my own body after we got 2gether. OMG-was I wrong. just bcuz my weight shifted from 170-??? should NOT make a difference (Editor's Note: afraid 2 step on a scale). he totally ruined my life and broke up with me over livejournal. i will NEVER love or TRUST a man again! Heck. I have a hard time loving my own body.

Beyonce is FIERCE and is sending a strong message to Rihanna that Beyonce is HERE 2 STAY.

I hope Jay-Z gets more than sideboob in the bedroom! #TeamBeyonce

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Beyonce BB! U look good as u stand on a balcony in France.

I have NEVER left the country... in fact I have never even stayed at a legitimate hotel. Usually just La Quinta Inns. One time I had to stay at an extended-stay motel for 6 months while my horrible landlord (who was actually kinda my BF at the time) said that I had mold in my apartment. I turned out he was using my apt as a meth lab, then I had to do some time for aiding and abbedding meth even thought I wASN't THERE. #notcool

I actually accidentally was involved in a human trafficking ring that was stationed in a series of Best Western hotels.

Beyonce LOOKS GOOD, and if u ask me, Rihanna is a TRAMP WHO WAS ASKING FOR IT compared to Beyonce, but at the same time, Rihanna is a STRONG SURVIVOR, but Beyonce wrote a song about being a SURVIVOR a loong time ago.

Beyonce looks good, bb!

<3 <3 <3

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GUESS WHICH HOTTIE CELEB IS SPORTING A SEXIE BIKINI AND RIDING SLUTWAVES IN THE OCEAN....

<3 <3 CLICK HERE 2 FIND OUT <3 <3

<3 <3 CLICK HERE 2 FIND OUT <3 <3

<3 <3 CLICK HERE 2 FIND OUT <3 <3

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Yall! Look at African American rapper Jay-Z and Beyonce sitting courtside @ a New Jersey Nets game. Jay-Z apparently owns the team bc he is really rich from white ppl wanting to be in2 rap.

Ughhh I am so jeal of Beyonce for being so effing flawless. If I wore leggings, u'd probably see a little bit of cottage cheese because I have put on some weight in recent years, tbh :-(

But ya I don't really like sports. My exBF used to just sit around and drink beer and watch sports and ignore me... so let's just say I'm a bit scarred. At first he tried 2 explain 2 me what the rules were but then he just said I was dumb and told me to go make him a sandwich :-(

I hope Beyonce gets 2 drag him 2 romantic comedies #romcoms

<3 <3 <3 Crazy in Love Lovers <3 <3 <3

Rihanna Who?
Kanye Who!

#staytogetherforthekids

15 Comments!!! <3




Beyonce! What r u thinking, gurle?

Ur wearing blackface... but ur already black... and u already appeal to white ppl... so why would u remind them that you are really, really black?

Beyonce's photo shoot for L'Officiel Paris' 90th anniversary issue. The pop star poses in traditional African clothes and pays homage to Fela Kuti.

Cmon Bee... Jay-Z is gonna be so pissed abt this 1...
I don't care if it is for art, this is just wrong.

After everything that our people have already been thru...
Shame on u, Beyonce.
This is not FUNNY
This is not ARTSY
This is not GOOD 4 AFRICAN AMERICANS

#TeamJenniferHudson!

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LOL LOL LOL LOL ROTFLMAOLOLOCOPTERS

Look at Jay-Z and Beyonce at the 2011 NBA All Star Game. They really know how 2 canoodle, if u know what I mean.

U gotta give Jay-Z props, though. He avoided the West Coast vs East Coast rap wars, then married a member of Destiny's Child. Not bad 4 just another hipster from Brooklyn. Amirite?

Love the shoes, Beyonce! I might go 2 Payless and buy some cheap whore shoes, then bedazzle them with cell phone bling from Wal Mart.

MMmmmm. save some soft pretzel 4 me, yall!

U gotta love couples who aren't afraid 2 share food. Because ya know, if u've already had genital-to-genital contact, what's wrong with sharing some cheesy nacho fries?

(Don't tell my personal trainer, but I had some of those last nite :-P)

Say what u will about Kanye West, but until he settles down, no1 is gonna like him except 4 indie ppl trying to be into black music.

<3 u Jay and Bee. @ me on twitter when u have the chance.

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Jay-Z and Beyonce go to another music festival, bro down with some ethnic comedian


Jay-Z and Beyonce are both a 'mainstream' power couple, and an 'indie buzzband' power couple. They seem to have a deep appreciation for indiewave artists because they usually 'headline' music festivals, but then spend time chilling out, watching buzzbands performing on stage. They also like to 'namedrop' indie buzzbands in mainstream articles to try to get blog cred + 'help' indie artists 2 cross over.

In this picture, Jay-Z and Beyonce pose at Bonnaroo with the ethnic comedian Aziz Ansari. (Note: Not sure if that is Beyonce, or possibly 'another woman' who is trying 2 cover her face.) Seems like they were all chilling VIP style at the relevant Tenesseeianese music festival which appeals to bros and college streamers who live in the middle of the country. Not sure which music festival attracts more white trash from Middle America: Lollapalooza or Bonnaroo. (besides the Gathering of the Juggabros).

Not sure what the deal with that ethnic comic is. Unsure if he is funny, or if he is just 1 of those modern bro comedians who does zany 'web shorts' that appeal to a limited audience, relying on the same gimmick(s) over and over again. Never really vibe that hard to comedy. Seems like it is 'trying 2 hard' or something.

Do u think Jay-Z and Beyonce like 2 laugh at alt comedians?
Is Aziz Ansari 'funny as fuck'?
Will Aziz Ansari 'crossover' into the mainstream, able to carry his own movie franchise, or will he sorta always be a C-rate mainstream celeb?
Does Aziz Ansari just tell 'jokes that make fun of black ppl 4 white ppl' because he is sorta somewhere in between?
Do Jay-Z and Beyonce need to 'make up their goddamn minds' abt how indie they want 2 be?
Do u feel 'uneasy' whenever the Knowles sisters are around?
Will creepy video footage of Jay-Z and Beyonce watching a buzzband emerge?

Solange Knowles kinda looks like Beyonce Knowles


Have u ever noticed how alt hipster blipster songstress Solange Knowles looks a lot like popular mainstream pop hit singer Beyonce Knowles?
Do u know if they are related?
do u know which 1 has a better voice that can be utilized in an indie band?
Which 1 is more authentic?

Alternative Celebrity Look Alikes compares the personal brands of alternative celebrities with other famous and microfamous humans. This ALT REPORT gimmick was inspired by the mainstream version of this meme at totallylookslike.com. Please submit your alternative celebrity look alikes at the ALT REPORT TIP LINE.
Beyonce releases official 'fuck doll' to appeal to more male fans


Beyonce is the wife of popular rapper Jay-Z. Beyonce's ass has been branded as 'bootylicious' after she wrote a song with the same name. Part of becoming a popular female pop star means branding yourself as a sex object. Beyonce has mastered her personal brand and is one of the greatest sex objects in the industry right now (especially after she collaborated with Lady Gaga).

The upside of this doll is that she is branded as having '3 holes that love to be filled.' (You can simulate oral, anal, and vaginal sex with this doll.) Many men find themselves in relationships where they are lucky to have 2 holes to fill. In addition, you 'don't have to put a ring on this slutty siren', meaning you don't have to marry her even though you cum inside of her, because she can't get pregnant.'

"This Single Lady Has All the Right Moves." This doll seems genius. Some bands create cool websites, others make viral videos, and some bands even make iPod apps to reach their fans. But if you really want to be connected to some1, you have to let them 'make love to you', so that they can look into your eyes while they cum and establish the most personal connection

Is the Beyonce Sex Doll a good idea to extend her brand to more male listeners?
Will men be paranoid that Jay-Z will h8 them if they make love to this doll?
Can you either be a Jay-Z fan or own this doll?
Would Jay-Z make love to this doll if Beyonce was away on business, or would he just cheat on her?
Is Beyonce still the 'hottest black woman on the planet' or did Jennifer Hudson / Whitney Houston replace her?
Are fuck dolls the future of 'band merch' / band brand extensions?
Do men appreciate female artists, or do they only care about how 'hot' they are?
Should I buy a sex doll?

Which other female artists should look into creating a sex doll?

Is the Lady Gaga + Beyonce Video ‘trying too hard’ or should u just let it give u an erection?
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Costume change. Nudity. Dancing. Singing. Weird hair style. Colors. Overrated plot.
Is Lady Gaga / Beyonce 'relevant'?
Does their 'art' mean anything?
Are female diva musicians more than just 'sex objects'?
Did this video just 'rip off' Kill Bill?
Are female pop icons 'original' or are they 'copy cats'?
Will Lady Gaga get 'gang banged' 4 the sake of art (as long as she is wearing something zany)?
Does Lady Gaga have 'staying power' or is she already last year's meme?

"Just dance...it'll be okay, yall.'
-Lady Gaga
-the only thing females can say to other females 2 help them feel more chill about life?