HIPSTER RUNOFF

U might not recognize this band, because it is the band Blink 182, before they 'blew up like crazy.' (L to R: Travis Barker, Mark Hoppus, Thomas DeLonge)

It's kinda weird these days. I feel bands want to 'make it' in a way that means 'not becoming a huge brand that can sell a bunch of shit to markets that u don't respect.' Whether it is tweens or people over the age of 36 who still buy Green Day albums, it seems like bands want to be 'successful' in a way that is like 'i just want 2 solid albums, and tons of indie cred.'

Feels weird looking at pictures of Blink 182's latest tour. Can't believe they almost 'broke up 4 good.' Seems retarded for these types of megaBands 2 break up 4ever. I think that they make like several hundred million dollars per tour. It seems 'too good to pass up', even if u 'didn't get along with some other bro in ur band.' Wonder if Grizzly Bear / Animal Collective / The Postal Service / Death Cab 4 Cutie will ever 'grow old' with their listeners, and eventually get to play large scale concerts where u overcharge for seats and make tons of money [via selling merch].

Seems lucrative to be Blink 182.

Moms line up with their kids 2 'buy merch.'

Photos via thecobrasnake

Groups of pre-altbros / maltstream teenbros form a deep bond/project their insecurities of 'being left out' by wearing the same shirt.

Tweens text & 'sext' & 'tweet' from ur show.

U have sponsors/an 18 wheeler with ur faces on it

A cellphone company tries to monopolize ur brand/get every1 to enter some text contest.

Tweens photograph u and post pix on the internet

Blink 182 has appealed to the 'Cali Bro' demographic, and bros who dress like 'cali Bros' who aren't from California. Even though they started 'smoking' and 'growing facial hair', they still love what ur band/music means 2 them.

U get to see ur older mexiBro fans mingling with tween girl fans, representing a 'bridge' across race + generation

U get 2 be a 'cool dad' and carry around ur child / human accessory

I feel like I will know I have 'made it' as a band when I play a large-scale outdoor venue, and I watch two shirtless bros embrace one another, as if they have just seen the 'sickest fucking performance' in the history of the concert going experience.

Can't believe Blink 182 has been around for 30 years. I wonder when it is time for a band 2 'hang it up', or is there just '2 much money 2 be made' if you are a respected brand with a tribe of loyal followers/fans who aren't 'connected' enough to find something new 2 enjoy.

Just want to start a band, build an 'insane' business model, and continue to let my brand grow old gracefully, continuing to rake in more money as the years go on.
Maybe the best music in the world appeals 2 the most amount of ppl and we should be happy that the bands that the most people like are the most financially successful. I feel like maybe having a 'strict brand' isn't necessary--maybe ur brand needs to be 'confusing', so that it can appeal to people in multiple demographics who 'don't understand life' and end up trying to 'be kewl' via antiquated methods, such as 'really liking blink182/green day/u2/coldplays.'

Does n e 1 else 'want 2 throw up' when u watch Bruce Springsteen 'perform live'/hear old ppl talk about his 'amazing performance'?

'I guess this is growing up, yall' - the blinking 182times

I wish I could be a little alternative baby/kid, born into mainstream alternative royalty. It would be sweet to have a dad who was in one of the most popular maltstream bands of all time. It would also be 'pretty sweet' if ur dad was some1 like Tony Hawk, or something like that, bc then u could 'get xtreme' and 'play video games.

I wonder if I would rather have Blink182dad as a dad, or FallOutDad as ur dad. Feel like Pete Wentz might be 'embarassing' because Fall Out Boy's songs are 'hella ghey' in a tweeny kind of way. Also, u might get made fun of at school since he took 'cock pix.' Would be sweet to have Jessica Simpson as ur mom, though. Heard she has 'sweet jugs' [via Nick Lachey]

Would feel sweet having Blink182bro as ur dad. Feel like he writes songs that u could actually relate to. He would also be pretty appreciative about life, since he almost lost a bro [via tragic plane crash]. Think that both dads are 'loaded', so you could probably be a consumerCore kid during ur youth years, where you are encouraged to have a loud personality, and possibly have long hair.

When I was a kid
all I ever wanted
were parents who were famous
(but at least rich)
they would encourage me to 'be myself'
Even if I didn't get good grades
bc they could get me a kewl job
when I graduated from HS
and didn't want 2 go 2 college

What kind of parents do yall wish yall had?

Previous Cool Dad Coverage
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/tag/cool-dads

Guys, usually I don't 'report' tour dates and stuff, but I think this tour is gonna be one that we remember for a long time.

What if I told u 2 of the biggest rocknroll bands of all time were going on tour?
What if I told u that u could experience some of the most influential music of all time for just the price of 1 ticket?
What if I gave u a clue, and said =w182= ?
Would u be able to guess

MTHRFCKNG WEEZER

AND MTHRFCKNG BLINK 182
are fucking going on tour

Holy fucking shit. I am a 34 year old alt, so I have been around for a while. I know a lot of tweens only know about these bands' recent stuff, but cmon yall. You can't deny that this is serious shit. Like if you told me 15 years ago when I was a kid growing up in SoCAl that these bands would be selling out huge amphitheatres, I would have told u 2 shoot more heroine in2 my veins.  Who woulda thought these bands would become rock gods?  Do you realize how influential these bands are?  They revolutionized everything.

This is fucking huge. I was fucking sad that Blink 182 broke up, but I think now they realize that 'all the small things' are important, and u should just chill out and be bros.

I'm gonna see all of my favourite songs. Rivers Cuomo is seriously a rock god and a genius. Did u know he went to Harvard? The guy can seriously take a shit, and it's a masterfully written pop song.

I am seriously fucking pumped yall.

(There is also an opening band called the Fall Out Boys.  I think they are a local band or something.)

WE FINALLY DID IT. INDIE MUSIC HAS ARRIVED.

But srsly....what tshirt should I wear to this concert?
a) Blink 182
b) Weezer
b) Angels and Airwaves
d) TRV$ DJAM
e) Boxcar Racer
f) Pete Wentz
g) Ashlee Simpson
h) Ryan Cabrerra
i) Further Seems Forever
j) Saves the Day
k) Red Hot Chili Peppers
l) Switchfoot
m) an Atticus shirt

n)  Choose.Your.Own.Response

[photo via thecobrasnake]
Yalll. It's good 2 see that M.I.A. is retired, but 'still likes to chill pretty hard with Los Angeles' biggest alternative celebrities.' One day, I hope to get pregnant, but still be able to chill hard and watch hulu/vimeo/youtube videos on my Macbook. Don't want to sacrifice 'my daily internet routine' to take care of a child. Guess that means I am 'still just a kid' and probz not ready 4 responsibilities. Just wanna chill with my fave DJs and 'get my party on [via pouring grey goose in my mouf].'

It's kinda weird how we're all 'growing up' and assuming more responsibilities. One day, I will be a father. One day I will be a grown up. One day, I will not drink/'do drugs.' One day I will own my own alternative business that contributes to society and the economy.

Being a parent must be challenging, yall.

"So I guess this is growing up."
-the Blink 182s

"Someday, Someday."
- the Strokes Bros

"I am jealous of M.I.A.'s baby because he will be brought into a post-Obama world, and he will not get to experience the pain and suffering that I have gone through."
-Carles

M.I.A.

Alternative Celebrity, Buzzband

M.I.A. is known for thinking that the American government is out 2 get her.

Lists: rappers, indie songstresses, annoying ppl, 2k10 buzzbands

Read more>>>>

Steve Aoki

Alternative Celebrity, DJ

Steve Aoki is an AZN DJ.

Lists: indie minorities, bros who love 2 party, beards, indie hunks, Record Label Owners, AZNs

Read more>>>>

The Cobrasnake

Alternative Celebrity

Mark Hunter is the Cobrasnake, some bro who travels around the world taking pictures of alt shit so now he has a lifestyle brand.

Lists: Photographers, Jewish, indie hunks, Californians, altbags

Read more>>>>

Does n e 1 know where I can get a 2-for-1 deal on salvia+an altBroad in a bikini?

Yall. Kinda weird how life has changed so much in the first 20 days of 2k9. I feel 'more grown up' and less interested in stuff that I used to be interested in. This includes stuff like 'partying', 'getting shitfaced', 'doing blow off my iPhone nano', 'electro music', 'DJ culture', and 'alt stuff from 2k6-2k8.'

(Note: I am still interested in tuggable skanks in any context/environment/setting, no matter what kind of babble is splurging out of their mouth.)

2k9 is a beautiful new year. I am getting more conceptual, learning to appreciate music, spending less time partying, and more time 'in nature.' [via the conceptual forest] Nature is my party animal.

"I guess this is growin up." - blinking 182 times

I'm looking forward to February so that I can stop worrying so much about this being the new year/being shellshocked about how different everything is.

[Photo by thcbrnsnks]
I never realized the drummer for the hit band that created hit songs like "all da small thangs", "dammit (yall)", and "What's my Zany Age Again?" has a BOOMBOX TATTOO on his tummy. People love getting audio equipment tats. I think it proves that they are genuine music fans. A lot of people think 'reading music blogs' makes them authentic music fans, but until u get an audio equipment tat, u don't truly luv music.

I don't think his boombox is as loud as this tat boombox. But some people don't like boomboxes and just get headphone tattoos. Some people with headphone tattoos also get turn table tattoos. Has n e 1 seen an iPod tattoo, or are people afraid to get those since they change them every 6 months? I guess we'll have to settle for people getting APPLE logo tattoos.

(What other logos should this bro get to represent his personal brand? Mountain Dew? Hot Pockets? Halo 4? )

N e ways...What's the deal with Travis Barker? He gets to 'remix' a bunch of songs by drumming over them. I think that if he lived in Blogville, he would be executed in public because that's what happens to teen-electro remixers who just put electronic drumbeats over mp3s and call them 'remixes.'

Do u remember the days when Blink182 was able to jump on the bursting Boy Band bubble and give mainstreamers a product that helped them distance themselves from taking boybands seriously?

'say it aint s0,
I will n0t g0,
turn the lytes off,
carry me h0me.'
-HIPSTER RUNOFF, 2k8

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "READER APPRECIATION POST":

Appreciate me!

Anons need love!!

HIPSTER RUNOFF: It's for teens who just want 2 b part of something 'bigger than themselves.'
HIPSTER RUNOFF: A little bit too 'insincere' for first wave Yupsters who view music as a search for revolutionary new artists with unique sounds.

DOES HIPSTER RUNOFF MAKE UR WORLD GO ROUND?

Thanxxx for the rainbow. HIPSTER RUNOFF <3s GHEYS

D.A.R.E. 2 <3 HRO

<3 <3 ANON CMMNTRS <3 <3

Commenters like U keep me from listening to "Adam's Song" and hanging myself in my closet.