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Vampire Weekend was the HUGE indie winner of the Super Bowl commercial war (6 comments) |
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Lana Del Rey wears baseball cap, looks TOTALLY EFFING keut (7 comments) |
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Skrillex spotted bronoodling with nostalgic human meme Mr. Belding in relevant VIP section (3 comments) |
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Lana Del Rey Album Sales: 'Born to Die' projected to sell ~60k copies, will land at #2 (12 comments) |
I have been on a neverending search 4 the perfect alternative breasts. I also discovered the perfect alternative backbone. It seems like as bros, we are all searching 4 a woman with the perfect 'bangin bod.' The 'complete package.'
Just trying to find answers to questions. What is an alternative bro/broad supposed 2 value in a female bod? Are 'huge tits' and 'huge asses' too mainstream? Are there more alternative parts of the body that a woman can showcase to woo a mate?
I feel like the 'lower torso' is a super hot part of the body this summer/festival season. QT gurls are doing everything they can to make sure their lower torsos are looking Good, bb! Even if u don't have perfect alternative breasts, having a firm core & beautiful lower torso.
Maybe the torso is so sexie, because we imagine it 'filled with a baby.'
Do u <3 or h8 when girls wear high-waisted jeans? do u feel like they are 'hiding something' [via shameful pooch]?
Do mom jeans showcase or hide the perfect alternative torso?
What do u look 4 in a lower torso?
Do u have a rock hard lower torso?
Is it important to not be 'too ripped' [via 6 pack]?
Is it important 4 ur lower torso to 'look like ur dying'?
Do u <3 or h8 ab definition on an alternative female?
Do u think the lower torso is sexier than breasts or a$$?
what is the sexiest part of the alternative female?
See more Perfect Alt Breasts
It's hard 2 be a mainstream female in the modern world
But I'm glad
I'm alt
I can really 'be me'
I know there's been tons of 'skinny bitches' in recent alt movies
Zooey Deschanel's crazy coke look [link]
Natalie Portman in the Black Swan: A Tale of Lezbo Hornie Anorexia
but I'm me
It does't matter how I look
It doesn't matter what I eat
It doesn't matter what u want me 2 be
I am free
Free 2 wear meaningful beanies, scarves, skinny jeans
Getting my nostril pierced
Wearing keut alt glasses
I love being a part of the scene
I can grub where ever I want
A vegan bakery
Chili's
Trader Joe's Olive Bar
Dunkin Donuts
Einstein Bro's Bagels
James Murphy's House of Pancakes
Chipotle
Combination Olive Garden + Red Lobster
I can be me
I can eat
whatever I want
And the indie blogosphere modern alt scene is here 4 me
I have the perfect alternative breasts
U have the perfect alternative breasts
Where I can go to an Arcade Fire show and not feel 'out of place'
Where I can listen to indie buzzbands and not be body-typially-profiled
Where I can meet the perfect altbro who <3s me 4 me
Love = Alt
Alt = Love
Me = U
Fat = Skinny
Alt = Mnstrm
I wanna become 1 with u
I wanna be me with u
I am the plus sized alt.
Alt has no size.
It feels good 2 be an alt
When alt is me and I am alt.
Does alt 'have a size'?
Can any1 be welcomed in2 the alt scene, no matter their skin color/size/ethnic background?
Do u have to be 'skinny' 2 wear 'skinny jeans'?
Do u h8 our modern mainstream society that pressures every1 2 be skinny?
So many men
Are into 'tits', 'breasts', 'knockers', 'gargonzolas'
or 'asses', 'butts', 'cans', 'rumps', 'poopers'
But I kinnda want to be in2 something more alt
A body part that is rlly authentic
Represents dedication to your personal brand
Any1 can get 'tit implants'
or even 'ass implants [via Kim Kardash]
Lately I've been really in2 girls with amazing backbone definition
U can see every bone in the spine
Making u wonder 'how do they preserve their body with 0% body fat'?
'Is that even healthy?'
but then ur like 'who cares?'
Ur giving up 'big tits' and 'a round-ass ass' when u go 4 a skinny girl
but thinking of that sexy backbone
is all u need
2 get by
2 'get u off'
Wonder if it is more difficult to find a girl with a nice backbone
than it is 2 find a girl with a 'nice tits' / 'a nice ass'
Will we evr find the perfect alternative breasts?
or even discover the perfect alternative ass?
'Hip definition' seems chill, too
but there's nothing as metaphorically as 'sexy' as a girl with a nice backbone
A girl with a solid support system
Structurally-sound
A QT who can literally 'stand up 4 herself'
Oh backbone girl
Not sure how u did it
But u made me realize
that 'tits and asses' are overrated
Do backbones 'turn u on'?
R u hornie 4 backbones?
Are 1 piece floral print bathing suits gonna be 'huge' this winter?
Is objectifying a woman with tits + ass = mnstrm?
What is the sexiest body part on a female?
Is it 'unsexy' whenever a girl has a backbone/spine that is 'too defined' or does it demonstrate that they are dedicated 2 being skinny?
I was browsing the popular alternative brand American Apparel's website, and saw that they had a social media gimmick, probably meant to drive traffic to their site, strengthen their brand, and inspire sales. They seem to have built a web tool that searches for the best alternative ass/bottom.
http://i.americanapparel.net/storefront/UGCStyle/BestBottom2010/
It seems like 'social media/community building' is truly the future, as we have seen by the facebook, myspace, and twitter. The website features 'complete functionality' for a 'rich user experience.' User submission, progressive commenting features, ass rating scale, and an excellent user interface. I think the goal of the site is to 'turn u on' and 'get mad hits' from the hornball demographic.
I am not sure if this site is something that women will browse. From what I understand, when women gain weight, it goes 'straight to their thighs + ass.' It might inspire young alts to make sure their ass stays in perfect shape, but older alts who are gaining weight/past their prime might feel insecure and defect from the brand. Not sure if they would showcase their 'cottage cheese' bottoms on this site, unless Am Appy meets the demand for aging alts by creating a 'plus size' site.
What is ur ass like?
What do u look for in the perfect alternative ass?
Here is relevant commentary on some of the most notable bottoms displayed on this American Apparel social media experience.
'Dear Lord. Let me see that tong-ta-tong-thong-tlong.'
Always wanted a cute alt ass in an Am Appy onesie.
Always had an Am Appy knee-high sock fantasy.
Feels good to be closer to my Afrikaan Fantasy.
I think this broad is 'cheating' because she is trying to showcase her luscious vagina lips.
Wonder if 'butt cleavage' is going to re-emerge as a relevant alternative trend.
[via the joke 'I'd got something I'd love to drop in that coin slot.']
Not sure if this is 'progressive underwear' or just a 'wardrobe malfunction.'
Wonder why the 'lil twink asses' are getting such low ratings.
What was ur fave ass?
What is the best type of Am Appy underwear?
Have American Apparel briefs 'gone tweenstream'?
Are thongs still 'relevant'?
Are g-strings the new alt underwear?
R u an 'ass man' or a 'tit man'?
Do u think this gimmick will help Am Appy's brand, or will they turn into a 'hipster porn site'?
Have u ever pleasured urself while looking at the Am Appy website?
Wonder if the search for the perfect alternative ass will replace the search for the perfect alternative breasts?
Explore the alt ass website
http://i.americanapparel.net/storefront/UGCStyle/BestBottom2010/
Sometimes I wonder if I 'worry 2 much'
about 'shit that doesn't matter'
like 'the way I look'
and 'how other ppl perceive me.'
Kinda just want to listen 2 Daft Punk
and 'gain a shit load of weight'
by eating 'bad ass foods' that
'taste awesome' but are 'probably killing me.'
I wish that there was some sort of 'plus size' solution
to look fashionable
and 'seem hip' and 'in the know'
But I think that part of 'being fit'
means that 'u care about being alive.'
wonder if Am Appy will come out with a 'plus size' line in 2k34
when their core market 'gets all old and fat'
Just want to 'be myself'
and like 'chill' and 'go to Chili's' and 'eat McDonalds breakfast'
and 'go out to binge eat Mexican food'
and 'eat lasagna' like the popular cat Garfield
but 'who will love me' for 'who I am'
It would take a strong person
to want to 'cum on'/'cum with'
some1 who is 'larger than life.'
Worried that my heart will stop
or something like that
R u happie with the way u look?
do u end up looking in the mirror for extended periods of time
thinking about the person u will be after u 'get in shape'?
Did u 'lose a lot of weight'/'gain a lot of weight' recently? Why?
Hope u r okay.
want u 2 b happie with who u r
Best,
Carles
Zooey Deschanel used to be an insecure teen. However, she eventually evolved into a premium 'piece of indie a$$' and her personal brand has been effectively monetized via movies, music, and mid-market clothing brands. While you are likely to just get older, uglier, and fatter, Zooey Deschanel has won 'the genetic lottery'. So it is 'totes ironic' that she wrote this letter 2 Vogue when she was 17 years old, telling them how effed up they are for making girls feel like they have 2 be skinny.
Sometimes I strip naked look at myself in the mirror and think, "I wish I was Zooey."
Zooey Gibbard married her husband Ben when he was 'thick', so maybe she doesn't care abt hefty/skinny, or ugly/pretty. Or maybe 'hefty Ben Gibbard' is 'what she thinks she deserves.'
Is Zooey Deschanel 'full of shit'?
Has she 'always been pretty'?
Do u wish u got to make a 17 year old Zooey D 'feel like the only girl in the world'?
Did u ever write letters 2 magazines?
Is 'commenting on blogs' the modern equivalent of 'writing letters 2 magazines'?
I really miss her crazy coke eyes/extreme skininess
Is Zooey Deschanel ur alt thinspiration?
Zooey Deschanel is an actress turned indie songstress in the mediocre buzzband She & Him.
Some artist / photographer made a 'think piece' art project that attempts to demonstrate the fact that American Apparel company branding experts are 'misleading consumers' by trying to make it seem like their models are 'every day women.' I feel like it worked. Basically, the artist had her disabled friend pose in fake advertisements that were supposed to mirror 'legitimate' Am Appy campaigns.
Does this send a message? Do u think she looks the same as most Am Appy models?
Official Project Description:
'American Able' intends to, through spoof, reveal the ways in which women with disabilities are invisibilized in advertising and mass media. I chose American Apparel not just for their notable style, but also for their claims that many of their models are just ‘every day’ women who are employees, friends and fans of the company. However, these women fit particular body types. Their campaigns are highly sexualized and feature women who are generally thin, and who appear to be able-bodied. Women with disabilities go unrepresented, not only in American Apparel advertising, but also in most of popular culture. Rarely, if ever, are women with disabilities portrayed in anything other than an asexual manner, for ‘disabled’ bodies are largely perceived as ‘undesirable.’ In a society where sexuality is created and performed over and over within popular culture, the invisibility of women with disabilities in many ways denies them the right to sexuality, particularly within a public context.
Too often, the pervasive influence of imagery in mass media goes unexamined, consumed en masse by the public. However, this imagery has real, oppressive effects on people who are continuously ‘othered’ by society. The model, Jes Sachse, and I intend to reveal these stories by placing her in a position where women with disabilities are typically excluded.
This work is part of a group exhibit for CONTACT 2010 and will be showing on over 270 digital screens in 50 Toronto Transit Commission stations on May 6, 11, 22 and 31.
Do u think American Apparel models are supposed to 'look a certain way' or is every1 free to be an Am Appy model?
Is this 'shocking'? Do you think you would buy from American Apparel if they had disabled / less-attractive models? What makes a model 'attractive'?
Is being alternative an 'equal opportunity' subculture? Do u discriminate against race, religion, mental + physical disabilities + other random ass criteria? Sorta feel threatened by this, like my world has been turned upside down, now I have to question my reality where I just 'followed my erect peen' towards truth. Maybe there's more to life/humans than sexual attraction + marketing.
Do u think this was a 'legit project' or is it just a well-executed meme that taps into the Am Appy zeitgeist?
Should American Apparel offer the disabled model a contract, just to generate blog buzz?
If brands don't have 'hot models' showcasing their clothes, will the brands be irrelevant?
Will handicapped / disabled people ever have the same rights as normal humans?
Are 'alt models' the new 'mainstream models'?
Is the 'hipster porn' strategy the best way to reach alt markets?
Did this 'progressive art project' send a message, or was it the same as any sort of low level American Apparel criticism / mockery meme that involves poorly utilized Helvetica + sexy model humor?
Would this have been more relevant 2 years ago?
Should every1 be equal, or is that an unreasonable expectation, and we all sorta just need 2 accept our faults/natural selection and moveo n?
