Christianity | Hipster Runoff

Christianity

I am the Christian Guitar Rock AltBro. I am Crushing it with The Lord.

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God gave me a gift
The ability 2 live
but more importantly
the ability to shred, riff and crush it

I am the Christian Rock Guitar AltBro Bro
Crushing it on Guitar

I crush all things through the Lord Savior Jesus Christ
He is my Savior
The Buzz Guide I need
2 help me navigate thru this krazie buzzosphere

I am playing my rock guitar
all around town
EFFING CRUSHING IT
Because the Lord has allowed me 2 crush it.

I am the Christian Rock Guitar Bro
Rocking 4 God
Rocking 4 u
The Buzz God has blessed me with a gift
and I rock 4 u.

Will Christian Rock Guitar Bro 'save' the indiesphere?
Will he be able to communicate with the buzz Gods to end the buzz drought?
Have u ever played ur guitar around town?
Because of God

R u giving up anything alt 4 Lent?

Photograph: an alt priest did a conceptual doodle on my forehead


Lent is a time where ur supposed to give something up because God died or something, or Jesus, or la Virgin De Guadalupe peaced into heaven or something. Anyways, you are supposed to give up a luxury item, or something that makes ur life better. It never really made sense 2 me bc why would God invent stuff and then want u 2 stop using it? Anyways, don't want 2 get in2 the story of when I told my congregation that they were 'full of shit' and got my parents banned from their church...

But I just wanted to ask YALL the question.
Interact with the alt middle-class.
Hear from REAL READERS like U...

Which alternative luxuries do u take for granted?
If there was some sort of 'Alt Lent', what would u give up?
Would u use Lent to make your personal brand 'more alt' or give up altness 2 'go mainstream'?

Here are some alternative luxuries that I am considering giving up/changes I can make to improve my life and the lives' of the ppl around me:

  • Stop Living at my parents' house rent-free
  • Help my mom take out the trash and do the dishes
  • Giving up meaningful Buzzbands
  • Stop DLing free, leaked illegal albums
  • No more Twitter
  • Deactivating Facebook
  • Activating Myspace/Friendster
  • No more Blow
  • No more Four Loko
  • Stop 'Partying'
  • Set free my sex slaves
  • No more Watching buzzbands Jimmy Fallon
  • No more JOing to Vicki LeGrand
  • No more impure thoughts of Alice Glass
  • stop 'cyberbullying' buzzbands
  • Stop Pretending that my dog is an alt celeb pet
  • Give up eating at Subway
  • Stop eating at Chili's just to hit on 'trapped in their lives' waitresses
  • Delete all of the 'browser button shortcuts' at the top of my browser
  • Refrain from visiting my favourite websites and blogs
  • Will use a Windows computer instead of a Mac
  • Will delete my entire music library
  • Will delete this blog
  • Will stop ordering garbage products from Etsy
  • Will stop being unemployed
  • Will stop yelling at my parents for living in suburbia
  • Overtweeting abt how sweet SXSW is gonna be
  • Overtweeting abt my 'coachella countdown'
  • Overtweeting abt how hard I am partying and how meaningful my bros are
  • Being more buzzband tolerant
  • Accepting the Lord Savior Jesus Christ in2 my life
  • Apologizing 2 my ex 4 that time that I ruined her life
  • Stop being alt
  • Go mainstream
  • Finally accept that AnCo is 'overrated' and 'will never outperform MPP'
  • Unvote for Barry Obama
  • Get a divorce from my wife so I won't have to be a cool dad any more
  • Start listening to NPR so I can try to understand lamestream overgrounders
  • Start shopping at Am Appy and Urby Outty again
  • Apply for a job filtering search results at Google
  • Crash my gas guzzler, claim it was totaled, purchase a hybrid
  • Open a Subway franchise
  • stop using wifi and use a long ass ethernet cord
  • stop going 2 coffee shops and just drinking from a water hose
  • getting to know my drug dealer 'as a person' instead of just using him 4 drugs
  • stop human trafficking foreigners promising them that I will marry them in 2 years to give them Green Card Status
  • Pull a 'Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan' on LeBron James while wearing a vintage Cleveland Cavaliers jersey
  • Become vegetarian
  • Become a vegan
  • Become a freegan
  • Shop at Whole Foods but eat unhealthily
  • Give up pastries at Panera Bread
  • Learn how 2 <3 again
  • Stop using the '<3' symbol
  • Stop chatting with ppl on the internet, use the phone 2 call them
  • no more txt mssgs
  • no more sext mssgs
  • no more JOing to Miley sexts
  • Stop eating ice cream
  • Stop eating 'froyo'
  • Stop going to all-you-can-eat froyo buffets
  • Stop being a lamestreamer
  • Become a streamer
  • Become a mainstreamer
  • Sacrifice altdom
  • Finally 'let go' of chillwave
  • End my crappy blog where I just make 'snarky' listicles bc I am a subpar writer who can't piece 2gthr real ideas + thoughts
  • Learn more abt ur mainstream sibling's way of life
  • Study abroad in suburbia
  • Stop ruining your current relationship by making ur exGF pretend she is Regine, and engage in a complex roleplaying scenario where you play Win Butler.

Is Christianity full of chill, alt ideas? Do yall miss Jesus when he is metaphorically executed bc of his irrelevancy, then comes back on Easter with a KILLER album that gets every1 buzzing again?

Are yall gonna use Lent 2 become a better person?
What alt stuff r u giving up 4 lent?
Is 'Lent' authentic? Do yall miss Alt Jesus when he disappears?
Do we take many alt day-to-day luxuries 4 granted?
What alt luxury/resource/lifestyle choice could u NOT do without?

In 2k11, will I ride Christian_waves instead of slutwaves?

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2k10 seems like it was either the year of the slutwave or the rapegaze. Sorta wonder if there is going to be a reactionary response where we just want to 'get conservative' and connect with the Lord Savior @JesusChrist. New genres will be created that take Animal Collective's family values 2 the next level.

Might get rlly in2 Christian music, touch the lord. From what I understand, u can be 'alt' and 'Christian', just as long as u accept His love in2 ur heart.

Really feel like I potentially wasted the last __ years of my life, focusing on all of the wrong things. I realize that 1 day I am going 2 die, and I need 2 figure out whether or not I want 2 chill in heaven. It seems like 'now' would be a good time 2 commit 2 riding Christian_waves.

Instead of spending my time in relevant dive bars, I will spend my time in relevant 'community centers' that smell like old ppl.

No more slutwaves, no more 'being hornie', no more 'hard peens'/'wet vagines.' Need to take His message 2 the masses.

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It feels good to be starting 2k11 with a new goal, a new Lord, a new God, a new reason 2 live. Maybe if we pray harder for bloggable MP3s, God will give us more buzzbands, more mp3s, and a bountiful buzz harvest in 2k11. I'll do anything 2 prevent 2k10 from happening again, even if it means accepting the Lord Savior Jesus Christ in2 my life.

Do u <3 slutwave or Christianwaves?
Will Christian + positive themes be 'hella prevalent' in 2k11 indie music?
Will indie music get really 'values based' as altbros reach the twilight of their '20somethings'?
Do u know any altChristians?
Do u feel sad abt altChristians because they look like they shop at some sort of Christian Hot Topic?
Does white Christian America make u sad?
Is showing ur love + devotion 2 God the ultimate form of self-expression?
Is ur personal brand stronger if ur on #TeamGod?

Ke$ha

Alternative Celebrity, Buzzband

Ke$ha is a slutwave autotune rapper who takes pix of men cumming on her.

Read more>>>>

Is the Arcade Fire Christian Music? Is Win Butler = Jesus Christ? Christianity = Buzzbandology?

Have u ever wanted to watch a new wave Christian sermon abt how the Arcade Fire is Christian music? R u bored with the indie blogosphere and seeking something 'more spiritual' in ur indie existence? Do u ever look at Win Butler and see Jesus Christ? Then u will probably connect with this preacher bro.

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It must be pretty crazy to be a young person who is looking for a way to connect with God in a modern Christian setting. It's so weird how the modern church as evolved to be all about 'live music' [via bros on acoustic guitar], 'exploring teen issues', and 'using social media, podcasting, and webstreaming' in order to engage their tribe/congregation. Christianity seems to be competing with modern media for the attention of young people in our crowded social media landscape. Feels like it is better to be Justin Bieber instead of Jesus these days [via huge twitter following].

Anyways, just watched this 'bat shit insane' Christian youth group pastor from Canada who did a 20 minute sermon on how the Arcade Fire has a bunch of Christian themes woven throughout their music. Basically 'creams his pants' over the album The Suburbs, and talks about how the 'nostalgic images of youth' that it inspires are those same vibes of innocence that Jesus is looking to inspire on a regular basis.

This is basically the flow chart of his sermon:
Youth = Love
Love = God
God = Christianity
Christianity = America
America = The Suburbs
The Suburbs = Love
Win Butler = Jesus
Jesus = God
Win Butler = God

Specific highlights include

  • Talking abt how The Suburbs is abt connecting with ur youth
  • Comparing Win Butler to Jesus
  • Talking about local tastemaker "Brandon" who has been to over 5000 concerts
  • Quoting 10 to 20 Arcade Fire lyrics, then relating them to Bible verses
  • Using sweet Arcade Fire album art to display his points
  • Saying that him + his wife are going to an Arcade Fire show
  • Uses 'buzzbands going mainstream' as some sort of analogy/metaphor for Jesus going mainstream & gaining a huge following, but still maintaining his authenticity
  • Describing the brilliance of the music / lyrics with a Pitchforkian voice.  Wonder if he should 'apply 4 an internship' and review Xtian albums / analyze social values in music.
  • Encouraging people to go to Arcade Fire's website and watch their interactive music video

I wonder 'what the eff' this pastor is trying to do. Maybe since he is from Canada, he is just trying to 'be cool' and 'connect with the kids who are in2 Canadian indie rock.' On the other hand, starting to wonder if authentic indie music with high level themes is just 'perfected' Christian music.  Wonder if any album that comments on the state of the modern American existence is indirectly a Christian album.

Seems intense to have to manage ur brand as a modern preacher / pastor / church leader. You have to do more to 'relate to kids' and be sure not to isolate them, but at the same time, u can't really have a dark pedophile personal brand any more. Seems like this old dude is just trying to get more twitter followers or something.

Just wish I could be his graphic design intern. Would capture some high resolution Google images off the internet, write some chill ass Bible quotes on them, then put them into the Apple keynote powerpoint. Would try to find images of the Arcade Fire that made them look like they were 'disciples of Christ.'

Wonder if Win is 'pissed' at this bro for saying his music is Christian, or if he would be 'flattered' that he was able to project vague commentary on modern spirituality/social identity into his ideology. I always thought that The Suburbs was all about Win saying 'Fuck the Suburbs. Eff America. Eff Christianity. Eff strip malls. Eff mega churches. Eff consumerism. Want something more authentic... There has 2 be something beyond the sprawl... A spiritual fabric that ties us all together, something even more authentic than generic Christianity.'

Just want to live in Middle America/rural America, and integrate God into my day-to-day life. Hitting up Wal Mart, high school football, and taking my GF's virginity in the back of my vintage, non-ironic SUV.

When u hear Win Butler sing, do u hear the voice of Jesus?
If u really think abt it, maybe all music "Christian Music" because God has created everything in this world: humans, animals, art, buzzbands, collectives of animals, architecture, brands, and even franchised restaurants.
Should more indie bands market themselves as 'Christian' to 'crossover' into Middle American / Walmart Rock demographics?

Is the Arcade Fire CHRISTIAN ROCK?
Is Indie Music = Christian Music?
Is Win Butler just trying to invent some sort of new-wave indie Christianity [via Neon Bibles]?

Is The Suburbs about the Lord Savior Jesus Christ dying for our sins, and rising again on the third day?
Should the Arcade Fire write a Christian album with songs with album titles like "Body of Christ", "One Bread, One Body", "Footprints" and "Holy Mary, Mother of God, Pray for us Sinners, Now and at the Hour of our Deafs" and "AMEN SOCIETY"?
Do yall wanna get 'jacked up' on the new indie buzzband Joel Osteen?

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If u fill up a basketball arena with listeners/ur tribe, are you officially 'a Christian prophet'?
Should modern new wave Christian preachers market themselves as indie buzzbands, trying to get a 'perfect 10.0' on Pitchfork?
Do u wish that when u were a developing youth tween, u had a preacher who connected with u by demonstrating life themes using modern media, buzzbands, and imagery that truly resonated with u?
Do u wish ur cool dad was a respected community leader and preacher?
Do u think this cool dad preacher is going to 'cream his pants' when they play "Wake Up" at the encore?

Is God real?
Does God exist in the vibes of indie music?
Will my local Christian church raise enough money to build a 'mega-church' in suburbia?
Are Christians just trying to brainwash u in2 their crazy cult any way possible?
Does this preacher bro need to 'LEAVE INDIE ALONE'?

Arcade Fire

Buzzband

The Arcade Fire is a 2k0s indie band that went mainstream because their songs sound like meaningful anthems. They pretend to be Canadian but Win Butler (lead singer) is actually from Houston, TX.

Read more>>>>

Win Butler

Alternative Celebrity

Win Butler is the lead singer bro of the Arcade Fire. He is married 2 some girl in his band named Regine. He is from Houston TX but now claims 2 be from Canada.

Read more>>>>

Does it make more sense to start a shitty band that goes viral, as opposed 2 wanting 2 change the world with 'good music'?

"Shine" by "Final Placement" (Original Video) from F.P. Shine on Vimeo.

I recently saw this video by the Christian Rock band Final Placement.  At first, the internet music fan is 'sucked in' because it sounds like Pavement/the Dirty Projectors, but then it degenerates into post-Modest Mouse post-Lifehouse Nickelback hopefulwave Christian High School rock.   It seems to have 'gone viral' because it is 'so terrible' and 'totally rips off the modern crappy rock band aesthetic.'  Since they are a Christian Rock band, there is also an added element of 'EPIC FAIL' according to mainstream internet users who process memes as either 'WIN' or 'FAIL.'  While this meme does a good job of tapping into elements of high-level unintentional comedy, it seems like the meme might have larger ramifications for the indie music sphere.

We find new music on the internet from a series of trusted websites, since we know that these sites will curate a content stream of mp3s that 'appeal 2 us.'  In recent years, this process has become exhausting, and the pressure to find a lifechanging mp3/band is higher than ever. This music video meme is an indie music game changer. Consuming this 'shitty band's' song + video will probably be imprinted in my head as one of the most memorable products of 2k10.   Maybe we need to 'shift' our expectations 4 new music, and accept low quality products that are failed imitations of previous products, as opposed to 'searching for something new and exciting.' Maybe the acceptance of chill wave into the indiesphere was the beginning of this process, except it was 'packaged' as a new+exciting wave of music/collective of artists.

It seems like this new band has totally 'transcended' the internet, creating a new model by which bands can reach a mass market of listeners. Maybe the goal needs 2 change from 'trying to make good music', but instead, making a laughable meme that appeals to millions of internet users.

Wonder if post-Lifehouse North Face bro Christian rock is 'the future' of relevant music.  It seems more realistic to consume 20-30 new shitty meme bands per year, as opposed to thinking you will find 20-30 new albums/bands that make u feel more fulfilled than 'having a good lil laugh.' It is also a convenient model, because you can also 'forget about the band' and not feel bad about it, as opposed to thinking u have to keep giving them another chance to 'recapture the magic.' It is a great consumer-to-band relationship, since we don't have to commit to a long term relationship with them just based on 1 good product, sorta like Interpol.

It seems like the pure spirit/core goals of a band are to:

  • create a project that u think is 'cool' with a universally identifiable message
  • 'copy' bands that u r 'inspired by', but then differentiate a little bit
  • reach millions of people, even if they don't pay for ur product, cuz u 'love the music, man'
  • spread the word of our Lord Savior Jesus Christ, the only Son of God

The band Final Placement has succeeded on all of these fronts, but possibly should have had some 'merch' ready to sell to die hard fans of the meme. Who would have thought that 4 teens from Midland TX could have 'captured the hearts of the internet.'

Sorta wish I could go back in time 2 high school, and watch shitty bands practice/perform/simulate 'being rock stars' based on the bands that they cite as direct influences.

Miss the days when bands just had to chill in abandoned warehouses until record labels found them and gave them a deal.

Miss the era of 'So Cold in the D', back when making fun of failed musical endeavors was more abt the racial divide of internet users vs. 'dumb black ppl.'

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Wonder if whites are backlashing against the poor whites who 'believe in God' and give educated whites a bad name.

Just want a remixable meme.

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Just want 2 be in a band that is heard by 1-5 million ppl.
Just want 2 find music that I can discuss with my friends that makes it clear that I 'get' 'it.'
Just want to share memes with the world.

Is North Face the most functional winter outerwear available in the current fleece marketplace, or was the brand just bolstered by the formative bro bag market?
Is Patagonia the alt North Face?

Do yall prefer 'good' relevant music or 'shitty' relevant music?
Which type of music is more fulfilling?
Do u feel deceived by mp3s, bands, and albums that are 'packaged' as being a 'good product', but are actually a shitty product?
Is Final Placement's "Shine" the most important song of the 2k10 decade?

Good Music == Shitty Music ?
Hella confused.

Should I get a tattoo 2 show the world that I am a good Christian?

Photo by the cobrasnake


Yall. Been going through a lot lately. Actually 'turned to the Lordbro' to get through in my time of need. I feel like there are 2 things I my life that I truly love--God [via The Lord] and 'sweet titties.' I decided 2 'kill 2 birds with 1 stone' and get a picture of Jesus, the New Lord, and put a pair of sweet lil tits on him. It is also kinda a metaphor about my relationship with Jesus, and how my parents forced His 'fairy tale ass' on me.

Sometimes I even 'jerk off' and I cum all over Jesus. I try to get my semen on his face, and sometimes I rub them on my tattoo's nipples. It's sweet. I feel like some people would tell me that I am 'weird' but they probably aren't in touch with their sexuality. I just want to test the limits. I want to cum so hard with a huge, erect cock. I just want to push the limits, kinda like the movie Eyes Wide Shut. Feel like David Carradine, also known as Bill Kill, knew what life was all about since he just wanted to get off.


Sorta hope I die in a hotel room with some AZNs, and have a rope tied around my neck/cock. Seems like the last thing I wanna do b4 I die is 'blow my load.'

Do yall have any dark sexual secrets/secret tattoos that u would like 2 share? [via getting a regrettable tatty on spring break back when u were a masintreamer]

Dear Lord, Thank You for My Blog. Love,


Dear Lord,
My blog has come a long way. I have never really taken the time to thank u, kind of like what celebrities, minorities, aggressive white people, & athletes with highschool educations do when they win an award. I feel like I have won an award. U have given me the 'self-awareness' 2 'get' life, and the 'communication skills' 2 write a 'socially relevant blog.' U have given me the opportunity 2 do things that put me in touch with the modern alt-common-man. I am s000 self-aware. and s000 funnie. and s000 creative.
I'm really thankful. if ur up there. I went through an 'atheist phase' when I was younger, but then I outgrew it. Back then, people thought it was 'progressive' 2 not believe in U. But then I realized how many gifts Yall have bestowed upon me. Whether it is my new Macbook Air, my Mazda Hybrid Priusmobile, or my $1200/month rent--I have a reason 2 be alive. This reason was given 2 me by u, GodBro.

Believing in God is the new 'h8ing organized religion.'
Faith will be critical when 'we all lose our jobs' in 2k9.
BELIEVE.

We must get more involved in our communities. We must stop 'connecting with people' on the internet, and go out and MEET people, and SHARE life experiences with them. There's more 2 life than 'going to clubs and getting drunk', yall. We have to go back to the place that CREATED us.

We must go back 2 church.

Find a preacher who u can identify with, yall.

Find some1 who 'speaks ur language' even if it means going to a Teen Church where the sing Christian Rock songs.

Find a 'Youth Group' leader who knows how 2 play acoustic guitar and can cover songs by Jack Johnson, the Nickelbacks, and the CreedBros ft Jason Mraz.

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We need to stop 'not believing', yall. We need 2 be more thankful for high speed internet connections. And sexual education. And the ability to 'express our personal brands.'

A lot of ppl wonder 'how can I end the drama within my scene?' It's like every1 is so caught up in trivial social bullshit and entire groups of friends end up fractured. Even though we have important things in common, like the stores where we shop & the bands that we listen 2, something eventually tears us apart. We need to stay together. We need to Believe, yall. We need to believe in GodBro a.k.a. the LordBro a.k.a. the Virgin de Guadalupe de CaliforniaAlts a.k.a. Pontius 'Not Cool Bro' Pilate a.k.a. the 12 DiscipeBros a.k.a. Noah's Arc (when he had 2 build a ship that would hold 1 of every1 piece of technology in the world).

We need 2 explore our 'faith' and 'belief systems' before this Obama guy wipes away religion from our Constitution/Declaration of Independence.

We must dedicate our lives' to 'teaching people from the Underworld/3rd World/Poorville' what we're all about. We have to teach them how they can use our ways to make their lives' better. Most of them are 'funny looking', 'brown' and can 'only speak savage babble', but we still need 2 take our message to them. We need to give them food, the word of the Lord, and low-speed internet access (and clean drinking water).

in 2k9, I'll probably only go into meaningful spaces that have a prevalent glowing cross.

But n e ways, yall. Sometimes I 'want 2 quit blogging', but then I realize that there's a REASON that I am alive. I am here to blog. I am here to generate memes. God gave me my 5 senses so that I could be a blogger. U have to BELIEVE that ur special. GodBro is your BromeBoy. Jesus a.k.a. the Lord wants you to succeed.

PRAY.
We're gonna need it.
Let's use positivity [via faith] to build back up what our society has destroyed.
Will u be an altChristian in 2k9?
We must UNITE against Barry Obama under the wing of GOD.

I thank the lordbro for giving me HRO, and for my audience of AltChristians. I am happy that we 'get' society, and that we're ready to start 'mobilizing' our FAITH and cultivating it 4 a greater good. I believe in us, Yall--I really do. God Bless us [via every1].

HR0 3.0 HAS OFFICIALLY LAUNCHED: KRAZIE KRISTIAN EDITION.

"Housekeeping." [Read this title in a derogatory Mexican voice.] (NSFW)


It's kinda unfair how some people are born in2 situations which they can't control. For instance, when these two people popped out of their mother's wombs, their lifepaths were already set. One was destined to be a housekeeper at a high end hotel. The other was destined to be a girl who took n00d photos and railed dudes. I'm not sure which life path I would want. While one is a little bit more priviledged and means I would have to work harder, the other life option might make life a little bit more meaningful. The harder you work, and the less that is handed 2 u [via silver platter], the more meaningful your life probably is.

(Wonder how my life woulda been different if I wasn't middleclass/uppermddleclss when I was a kid? Would my perspective of the world be ttly diff or the same? Or would I have a 'chip on my shouldr'?)

There's just s0 many ppl on Earth, yall. Kinda feel 'blessed' that I have an opportunity to be the only me on this planet. It's a privilege, and I respect the process of choosing my authentic career and forging a meaningful personal brand around it.

[Photo by LastnightsParty]

Should I start reading books abt how my life is special & how I can do whatever I want?

Should I start going 2 church in basketball arenas to be 'part of something bigger than myself'?

Should I become a party promoter/positive ChristianBro? Should I stop being a trivial electro producer and start dressing like a bagmainstreamer who srsly plays the acoustic guitar and wants to 'make it' as a Christian band?

What Music Will Sound Like in 2008 (Part 7 of 5)

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zHfzrqLIniE&hl=en&fs=1]
I think in the future, we won't be able to tell the difference between what is ALT and what is CHRISTIAN.

For example, we don't know if the popular band JUSTICE (aka Jousteece) is a Christian rock band, or a band from France/the Vatican.

What will the cover of Justice's next album look like? Does their graphic design team have a way to convert this powerful image into a quirky, interesting aesthetic? I think the plain 'cross' is getting boring, so they probably need to 'spice it up' with a little bit of Savior, if u know what I mean...

(H8 u Pontius Pilate)

Good luck, So Me!

VIDEO: The Kickstarting Non-Self-Aware Alt Christians perform a buzz song 4 the Lord

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You might remember the Non-Self-Aware Alt Christians, some alt Christians who launched a Kickstarted to raise $5k to make money to go on tour to do things like drink coffee, and spread the Gospel of the Lord Savior Jesus Christ. What was their plan? "Be artist-y and go places with other Christian Artist-y ppl." What if I told you that right now, they are travelling across the country, with BIG THANGS POPPIN for both the Lord AND for their careers as a relevant [Christian] indie buzzband.

It seems like they recently took the time to shoot this video, where they praised the sweet Lord. As u can see, during the song, they utilized an acoustic guitar, a xylophone (manual jimmy jangler) and an accordion to summon the spirits of God to make this world a better place.

It is clear that they are using our Kicktstarted money on something hella relevant.

Do u think they are drinking plenty of coffee?

Are they putting the $$$ to good use on A Tour Of Sorts?

Are they ur fave band?
Did they crush it?
Do u feel closer 2 God?
R u in sync with His Message?
Do u think they miss Portland?
Do u vibe 2 this buzzband/mp3?
Are they the purest souls in indie?
What will Christian Pitchfork give them?

PREVIOUSLY
Watch the dumbest alt-art-project Kickstarter video evr, made by non-self-aware alt-Christians


The Non-Self-Aware Alt-Christians

Buzzband

This is a band that received a $5k Kickstarter donation to spread the word of the Lord Savior Jesus Christ around the Country.

Read more>>>>

Watch the dumbest alt-art-project Kickstarter video evr, made by non-self-aware alt-Christians

Writers.
Students.
Aspiring artists.

We have ideas.

Thrift store frequenters.

We want to do things.

ART.

We are going on tour.

The message.

Connecting.

Like-minded individuals.

Conversation.

Community.

Across the country.

Micro-connections.

Interfacing with other artists.

Creating dialogue.

Renting a van from Enterprise Rentacar.

Macbook Pro.

Grassroots musicians.

Bound by a common thread: We are People.

Adobe Final Cut Pro

Buying a pastry at a coffee shop.

Getting back to basics.

Art is not about the individual.

Please fund our vacay.
Please fund our dream.
Please fund our art proj.
Please fund my life.
Please fund me.
Please.
Please fund this meaningful experience which will be documented.
The artist [via me] is present but I need #FUNDING [via you].
Kickstart my life
Kickstart me.
Plz Kickstart evrything.

Plz fund my kickstarter.

We were artists.
Plz send money
Plz snd food.
Care package [via donation]

Four restless kids traveling cross country, cameras and instruments in hand, to share and discover the relationships between art and community.

One day a group of friends sat down, coffee in hand, and had a conversation about community. He makes music. She has a way with words. His stage presence is unordinary and she plays the accordion like nobody’s business. But what do you do with that? How do you use seemingly abstract talents to make a difference?

So we dreamed a big dream. Let’s find out. Let’s charge our cameras, pack our journals, fill our gas tank, throw our instruments in the van and hit the road. Let’s drive across the country and find out how other people answer those questions.

That’s the big picture. Here are the details.

Starting June 1st, the four of us are driving across this beautiful country to do 3 things.

1. We are going to share our art. We’re playing shows from Los Angeles to New York. Philadelphia to Boulder. Everything from house shows to bookstores. We will write and photograph and film along the way.

2 .We are going to network. We are tired of the Christian being known as the inferior artist. We serve a God of excellence and we want to see how others use creativity outside the walls of the church. We are traveling around, cameras and notepads in hand, asking the question: “how do you use your art to make a difference in your community?” We are interviewing individuals in every city we visit to gain a better perspective of the American church and its relationship with the arts. We will post videos and interviews on our blog along the way.

3. We are going to encourage others. We want you to be a part of this adventure. Parents, friends and strangers alike. This part of the tour is two-fold. First, we want to open up our lives to you. Being on the road will not be comfortable and we want to share that with you. We’d like to tell you our stories; for you to be able to relate to our struggle for community. To achieve this, we will be blogging and posting videos on a regular basis. Secondly, we want to support others who are doing incredible work in our communities. To us, this means partnering with other artists and entrepreneurs on the road - using what we have to support and enable others to succeed.

Here’s how you help: This project is costing us nearly $7000. We decided to be conservative and set the goal at $5000. This goal will get us, at bare minimum, across the country. But we NEED your help. In case you are new to Kickstarter, this is how it works:

We have a limited number of days to meet our financial goal of $5000. By making a pledge you are helping us reach this goal (not to mention receiving some fun rewards in the process). If we don’t reach the $5000 mark by May 28th, we don’t get any of your pledges. So please, don’t wait to invest in this project.

Our heart is to be as transparent as possible. This is where your money is going:

Over 8000mi of driving: $4000

35 dollars a day for 4 people for food: $1500

Insurance, emergency funds, car maintenance: $1500

I have an idea.
Plz donate and I will stop clogging ur FB/twitter feed.
My idea will add value 2 the world.

R u going to donate 2 this 'art'?
Does God approve of Kickstarter, or should u just #pray?

My mother kickstarted me out of her womb.

CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIVES: Was God trying to send a message with the Radiohead stage collapse?



My name is Father Lucas Flynn, and I run a few prominent, well-attended youth groups in my local community. Don't let my appearance fool you. I'm a music lover just like you, even planning a trip to a regional music festival later this summer.

I wanted to write this about something important that happened, and how young people can use real life events to try to make sense of this crazy, crazy world we're living in. That's what I do--I tie in lessons from the real world into the Bible so that we can all have a better understanding of His Message to us.

This Saturday in Toronto, a tragedy happened. No, not because the Radiohead show was cancelled, but because of why it was cancelled. The stage collapsed, tragically killing one person. Please keep the people directly affected in your prayers.

As a pastor, I can't help thinking. Perhaps the Lord was trying to send a message. I am the first one to say that He works in mysterious ways. But sometimes we have to ask tough questions to find out anything about His Message to Us.

I thought about a world without Thom Yorke. He has spoiled us with so many years of music. Maybe it's time for him to take a break, find out what he wants to give to the world as a Christian, not just as a indie rock musician. Don't get me wrong, I'm a HUGE Radiohead fan. I've been known to strum along to 'Karma Police' and 'Creep' after Teen Bible STudy, when we're just jammin along.

(FYI: My nickname is Father Cool, because I am the 'cool' pastor.)

Is it time for Thom and the boys to hang it up? Perhaps he is telling Radiohead to no longer play together as a band. Take a break, guys. It coulda been you. It coulda been the worst thing to ever happen in indie.

God once said that sometimes you have to pack up your suitcase, and move on. Heck, even Jesus did it, and even he got to rise again. Radiohead could have been on that stage as it collapsed, and we would have lost some indie rock legends. Even if you guys go away, there is a chance that you could come back.

There's more to life than making money off concerts.

These concerts that we go to are beautiful events where communities are united. But maybe God wants us to clean up our act. Ensure that He is being worshipped adequately at EVERY major music festival. I say that there should be a Christian stage at EVERY major festival, so that the Lord knows that there are people willing to JAM on him.

A stage collapsed. But maybe there is a message in this wreckage. We can learn something from this. Radiohead: Don't be afraid to take some time off. Listen to God. His message is powerful, and he is not afraid to send another one.

In His Name We Pray.
Amen.

Father Lucas Flynn is a contributor to HIPSTER RUNOFF and the youth group leader at Christ Hill Christian Church for New Beginnings. He specializes in youth groups with a specialty in high school teen issues.

Please comment on what your interpretation of God's message.

Radiohead

Buzzband

Radiohead is a conceptual band that ppl like to think is kewl because u can do drugs and get deep 2 their music.

Read more>>>>

Thom Yorke

Alternative Celebrity, Buzzband

Thommy Yorke is the lead singer of the Radio heads. He dances around like a free spirit.

Read more>>>>

Christian Version of Rebecca Black's "Friday"!

by the UlTiMaTe LaMeStReAmER!!!

I love love love this new version of Rebecca Black's hit song "Friday" called "Sunday."

It is sang by a girl who clearly LOVES the Lord Savior Jesus Chris and is not afraid of showing her love and devotion to Him. #TeamGod The song is BRILLIANT and captures the spirit of modern Christianity, and even features wonderous shots of her local megachurch. I would LOVE to worship with her, but mainly because there is a foodeteria on their church campus #jk :-P

I used to be a party girl, but then God really did help me get thru a really bad breakup where I had nowhere to turn, and I was homeless for a stretch. I would come to the church for free coffee, oatmeal, and cookies, and it would be the only place that would take me in and feel loved. I considered becoming a nun, but they aren't allowed to read pop culture blogs all day! #eff_that #lol

Sunday, Sunday, worshippin on Sunday!

Community Christian Church presents the OFFICIAL PARODY of Rebecca Black's "Friday", Sadie B's "Sunday." Featuring BP and Master E. Visit us on Easter Weekend (worshippin' worshippin' yeah!) at one of our many locations in Chicagoland - find out more at http://www.communitychristian.org

This song is THE BOMB and if Christians made more songs like this and Lifehouse songs, I would definitely listen 2 it more.

#TeamGod

Friday who? #TeamSunday
Patrice Wilson who? #Team_Youth_Group_leaders

I need to GET BACK IN TOUCH with my Spiritual side. I also need to hit the gym. Ugh! Getting stressed thinking abt it. So much stuff to do to improve my life and I have a lot of dishes in the sink.

I <3 <3 <3 "Sunday" and I am definately hitting up the Teen service at my church this weekend, because teen Christian themes really resonate with me. God is COOL and more non-believers need to realize that and get in touch with cool God.

Lady Gaga dresses like a whorish nun & offends Catholics

by the UlTiMaTe LaMeStReAmER!!!


Lady Gaga is at it again! Check out Queen Slutwaver and her controversial new outfit... There is no way she can top this 1 unless she comes out on stage with a 'cross dildo' shoved in her changa!

Check out this nun outfit from her tour where she dresses like a nun, but at the same time, shows off her sexi lil B-cups! I like that she used white electrical tape instead of a bra. She rlly knows how 2 innovate, but I hope she doesn't accidentally peel

I wish she could be my Sunday School teacher, yall... But most of the nuns at my church seemed kinda like 'closeted lesbians' or something creepy like that. :-(

<3 <3 <3 <3
#GagaIsBetterThanGod

~~~Slutwaves evr&evr~~~~~

WAVVES rolls a joint out of the Bible. Has he gone too far?


I just saw on twitter that the popular buzzband WAVVES (aka Nathan Williams) wanted to get high, but he didn't have any sort of 'rolling papers', a 'bong', a 'pipe', a 'soda can', an 'apple', brownie mix, or any other contraption that he could use 2 get high.

Instead... he opted for the most extreme option possible... The complimentary copy of the Holy Bible in his shanty motel room.

Shame on u, WAVVES. The Holy Bible is filled with tons of inspirational, true stories, sorta like an ancient "Chicken Soup for the Soul" book. Who do u think u r? Do u think God/Jesus/The Virgin Mary/Pontbro Pilates' life is just a job? Shame on u.

We cannot confirm that Best Coast also 'took a hit' from this Bible joint.

I know ur new goth brand is all abt h8ing God... but u have to realize that if u want to appeal to Middle America, u will have 2 become one with God. U will have to appeal to the believers.
wavves goth
Has WAVVES 'gone too far'?
Do they grow dank in hell or just in heaven?
Do u get 'more high' when u smoke dank rolled with Bible rolling papers?
What is the chillest Bible verse / story / blog post that u can get high 2?
R u on #TeamGod or #TeamWAVVES?
Is WAVVES 'trying too hard' 2 'be controversial'?
Is it 'alt' not 2 believe in the Lord Savior Jesus Christ?
Is this 'the begining of the end of WAVVES career'?

"I believe in the power of authentic buzz. Through His chill vibes, I can accomplish anything. His chillwaves shall grant me neverending relevancy."
-Chill 3:16

Wavves

Buzzband

WAVVES is a fuzzy buzzy buzzband that sings about aliens, marijuana and being a failure in life but laughing abt it because u r high.

Read more>>>>

Some article abt a church in Brooklyn that 'welcomes effing hipsters'


I sorta want to re-brand myself as a freelance journalist who goes from paper to magazine to zine to local reader, and just writes trend pieces about hipsters. I will locate a community with tons of young ppl who are kinda 'hipster', and try to find a place that they are 'infesting.' It will be an opportunity to educate old people about 'hipsters' and maybe get some young ppl ironic traffic/mad hits.

Anyways, just read an article about HIPSTERS in WILLIAMSBURG BROOKLYN who started GOING TO CHURCH.

Here is the intro that manages to use the buzzwords 'irony', 'tattoos', and 'skinny jeans':

On Sunday evenings, a Hispanic Lutheran church on the gritty south side of Williamsburg transforms into a hipster religious revival with plenty of fashion but no irony.
Worshippers with full-sleeve tattoos, skinny jeans, stocking caps and square glasses pack the pews of Resurrection Presbyterian Church on South Fifth Street.

Sounds so hipster, yall.
Rlly a bzzwrthy trend piece. Young Ppl vibing out at a cultural location/meeting place.

Do any weird ppl go there? Like ppl who don't look like mainstreamers in church?

"The fellowship with everyone here is amazing," said Shaun Lee, 30, a skinny, scruffy East Village bartender who sports a skullcap and cargo jacket to service.

Can 'effing hipsters' be Christian? Do yall know if relevant/buzzworthy humans are Christians? Would I feel comfortable there?

The aisles are full of artists, actors, fashion stylists and musicians.
Even the pastor, the Rev. Vito Aiuto -- trained at the Princeton Seminary -- is in a band, and has recorded music with indie hero Sufjan Stevens, an occasional congregant.

Oh damn. U know Sufjan? Might vibe out at that church if the pastor gives a sermon abt why his new album is 'effing terrible.' Sorta want a pastor who talks to G-d abt buzzbands, and can relay to me what Godbro thinks is relevant.

Live jazz accompanies the collection, and church suppers include plenty of red wine, but the holy hipsters are serious about Christ. During services, parishioners raise their arms in prayer and confess that God saved them from "the power of the devil."

Feeling the power of the devil
inside of me
Need 2 cleanse myself
of 'hipster sins'
PBR
fixed gear bicycles
relevant buzzbands that use curse words
relevant buzzbands that have 'gothic' prnl brands
casual sex on the reg
dank on the reg
cocaine blow on the reg

Do yall believe in hipster christianity?
Can alts believe in God?
Is God real?
Is God 'alt' or the ultimate mainstreamer?
Or is he a chill mainstreamer, but has too many lamestreamer friends?

Jesus 'dressed as an effing hipster' is on the cover of a Christian magazine


I just received my monthly copy of Christianity Today magazine and my #1 bro Jesus is chilling on it. Mad props to him. I know him 'behind the scenes' [via prayer] and he has been working out a lot, giving up carbs + sodas to trim some weight before his magazine cover shoot. He didn't tell me what He would be doing on the cover, but promised me it "would go viral." Little did I know that He would go so viral on the hipster bashing circuit.

Really gotta give it up to my bro JC. Dude 'killed it' in his wayfarers + skinny jeans. He said he wanted to be holding a can of PBR, riding a fixed gear bike, listening to his iPhone, but they were like 'no, let's keep it simple.' U gotta give him props for thinking outside the box.

Not sure why Christian mags keep doing these 'pieces' on 'Hipster Christianity.' Seems like they are just trying to let their followers know that 'u can be KEWL and be an authentic hipster' or something. Seems like a solid message in suburbia.

Did Christianity today 'exploit' Jesus by dressing him up like some sort of 'effing hipster'?
Does JC look good on the cover?
Will this magazine sell tons of copies because a famous teen global icon is on the cover?
Did u read Christianity today in ur dentist's office?
Do u hope the Christian magazine industry goes under?
Should Christianity 'leave alternative culture alone'?
Do u think Jesus <3s buzzbands?
Which buzzbands would he enjoy?
Is Jesus 'the biggest mainstreamer of all time'?
Do u think JoJo and Mary are 'ashamed' of their 20something son who thinks he is 'God's gift 2 mankind'?

INFOGRAPHIC: Only Poor People Need “God” 2 distract them from having crappy lives


I have been trying 2 find faith in my life, connecting with some version of a white or brown God, but I've been having trouble because I am 'upper-middle class.' Some scientist/sociologist/anthropologist just made this 'infographic' that demonstrates how poor people 'love God.' Rich countries are kinda into God, but they don't really need it as much because they are busy spending money on 'material things.'

Why do yall think that poor people / poor countries need 'God'?
Do u have a God bro in ur life?
Do only poor Americans 'need God'?
Do 'religion' and 'capitalism' go 'hand in hand'?

Here is the infographic:

What did u learn from this?

  • The 'brown' parts of the world believe in a 'brown' God
  • South Americans + AZNs chill with some sort  of Religious system
  • American Christians h8 being Catholic, but <3 their white God
  • Great Britain also likes to ride the protestant wave
  • Japan believes in some God even though they are ric
  • U should move 2 Scandinavia / a kewl European country if u want to be rich but not believe in God

R u Muslim, Catholic, Protestant, or 'other'?
Which country has the zaniest God in the World?
Do u wish this infographic was just a huge bubble that represented the world adopting a new wave Christian religion that helped us to 'get rich quick'?
R u happy u live in a rich country?
Would u rather be rich or have 'mad faith'?
Is religion and important part of ur daily life?
Do u wish 'harvesting buzzbands' was a religion?
Should P4k convert 2 become an indie deity?
Why do poor people need God so much?
Do white American poor ppl <3 God [via Walmart]?
Should we go into Third World countries and try to make them 'Christian' [via modern crusades]?
If we give them high paying jobs in factories, will they be willing to abandon 'God'/adopt a new version of God that tells them to make more iPods/sneakers?

Some a-hole writes book abt how teens are inauthentic Christians, calls them ‘hipster X-tians’


In high school, it seems like there is usually a 'group of Christians teens' who love 2 get together and talk about God, play acoustic guitar, and gather in some1's parent's huge, upper-middle class house [via being able to buy a huge house due to low property values in suburbia]. The event is usually catered with un-smart snacks and mediocre baked goods, because teen metabolisms can handle any type of food. Many question if these teens 'truly love God', or if they are just getting together for social reasons. Since these kids are usually white and rich, they love 2 'drink and fuck', and just try to seem 'holier than thou' cuz they chill out in youth groups while some 24 year old counselor bro 'talks about God' with them + throws down some Jack Johnson-like acoustic duets. Hella 'inauthentic' cuz tweens just wanna be teens--they don't rlly care about God.

Seems like there is usually a 'rival group of alt Atheists' who want to point out these Christians are 'full of shit' and that they 'don't really believe in God'--they are just searching for some sort of moral approval + opportunity to gather in their 'rich white social circles.'

What were ur religious beliefs like in high school and what are they like now? Did yall h8 going to church as a kid, realizing that it was a mainstream process that wasn't really an effective use of time?

Anyways, some1 wrote a book about this phenomenon of 'inauthentic Christians' because they 'compiled data'/interviewed teens who are 'Christians.' Not sure why they called them 'hipster christians'. Must be some sort of commentary on 'the hollowness of hipsters' or something.

She interviewed teens about their faith after helping conduct research for a controversial study called the National Study of Youth and Religion.

The study, which included in-depth interviews with at least 3,300 American teenagers between 13 and 17, found that most American teens who called themselves Christian were indifferent and inarticulate about their faith.

The study included Christians of all stripes -- from Catholics to Protestants of both conservative and liberal denominations. Though three out of four American teenagers claim to be Christian, fewer than half practice their faith, only half deem it important, and most can't talk coherently about their beliefs, the study found.

Seems like tweens are 'too stupid, and self-obsessed' to be actual Christian. Makes sense. Teens don't really 'like' anything, u just sorta have to construct trends for them to buy into for that window of their lives'. Christianity seems 'the same as the Jonas Brothers'/'an alt buzzband.'

Seems like teens only know how to talk about sex, money, material things, people they h8, and other inane things. Unfortunately, they don't really 'get' authentic Christianity.

Many teenagers thought that God simply wanted them to feel good and do good -- what the study's researchers called "moralistic therapeutic deism."

Some critics told Dean that most teenagers can't talk coherently about any deep subject, but Dean says abundant research shows that's not true.

"They have a lot to say," Dean says. "They can talk about money, sex and their family relationships with nuance. Most people who work with teenagers know that they are not naturally inarticulate."

Sad that my church doesn't have the social tools to help me deal with real life/teen issues. Wish I understood why life was so unfair. Why did my parents get divorced? Why won't they buy me an iPhone? Why do I only have a pay-as-you-go phone? H8 the Lord God Bro for not explaining these things 2 me [in 140 characters or less]

Corrie, echoing the author of "Almost Christian," says the gospel of niceness can't teach teens how to confront tragedy.

"It can't bear the weight of deeper questions: Why are my parents getting a divorce? Why did my best friend commit suicide? Why, in this economy, can't I get the good job I was promised if I was a good kid?"

Seems like God really needs a twitter account, or need to learn to offer text + chat based prayer answering services. He might have to outsource some work to India, and it might hurt his American Brand.

Can u blame Christian parents for creating inauthentic Christian kids?

Did ur parents 'drag 2 church'?
Did it help cultivate ur faith, or did it just make u feel like 'Church is for mainstreamers'?

Wish my parents would have 'done something simple' to show me the 'way of the Lord'. Seems like maybe they were 'too middle class' to be able to prove what it meant 2 be a Christian:

She says parents who perform one act of radical faith in front of their children convey more than a multitude of sermons and mission trips.

A parent's radical act of faith could involve something as simple as spending a summer in Bolivia working on an agricultural renewal project or turning down a more lucrative job offer to stay at a struggling church, Dean says.

But it's not enough to be radical -- parents must explain "this is how Christians live," she says.

"If you don't say you're doing it because of your faith, kids are going to say my parents are really nice people," Dean says. "It doesn't register that faith is supposed to make you live differently unless parents help their kids connect the dots."

Feel like I woulda turned out to be an authentic member of God's white army if my parents 'manned up', gave up their middle class jobs, and chilled out in Central America teaching 'dumb Mexicans' about the way of the Lord/white man. Feel pissed @ my parents for not getting me on the path towards God.

Do u believe teen Christians are 'inauthentic'?
Are teens 'authentic followers/fans' of any trend, brand, band, or religion?
Should teens feel 'empowered' or should all humans be required to own some type of property before they are allowed to vote/have an opinion?

Should I join a national youth group network, such as YOUNG LIFE? Will I be able to connect with a group of likeminded tweens, or is facebook a better way 2 talk abt life + trends with tangible humans?

Should I go on some sort of hiking/skiing trip with my youth group, sneak out late at night, get 'effing drunk' and obtain my first 'beej'?

Should I decide not to go to college, and just become a 'youth group leader' so that my parents 'get off my back' for being a societal failure because they will just think that I am 'serving the Lord' and if they question me they will be 'spawns of Satan bro'?

Do yall know any 'hipster Christians'?
Should I buy the book "Hipster Christianity" or does it look like a crappy blog post turned into a book?

Do u think this author abused the word 'hipster' just to get 'blog buzz'?
Is 'hipster' an adequately descriptive word, or are book titles just constructed to 'get mad hits'?
Is it 'alt' to be Christian?
Have yall ever been in a prayer circle that involved an acoustic guitar and a dead-end 20 something wearing a Northface fleece?
Are you a former mainstreamer who 'used' Christianity as a way to get ur parents off ur back?
Are all authentic alts post-god?
Should God take out 'banner ads' on alt blogs to reach 'the hipster demographic'?
Do alts 'believe in God', are they 'atheists', or just 'hella chill agnostic bros'?
What do u believe in?
Is God real, or just 'bullshit'?

Indie Christian band SWITCHFOOT ‘effing kills it’ at Lollapalooza


Switchfoot is a bad ass Christian rock band that plays sweet rock tunes, except they are about positive vibes [via the Lord Savior Jesus Christ]. From what I understand, 'God' and 'alt rock' go hand in hand, since Jesus was apparently in a local alt rock high school band during his formative years in Bethlehem.

N e ways, it seems like Switchfoot 'effing killed it' at Lollapalooza, putting to shame every single other act. Whether ur an indie band or a headlining slutwave artist, no1 'sleighed' quite like Switchfoot. Wonder if more alts will start getting in2 God, and there will be a demand for Christian wave indie music.

Sorta feel like I need to be inspired, and indie buzzbands don't really 'do it 4 me' any more. They only sing about deadbeat summers and feeling it all around. Need some1 to tell me there is a positive bro in the sky looking out for me in the form of a GodBro.

Feelin' glum? Go to a Switchfoot concert. The San Diego quintet are pop-rock motivational speakers with hooks for days, and Jesus is on their side. They started as Christian rockers but hit the mainstream by the grace of feel-good anthems like "Meant to Live" and "Oh! Gravity." Longhaired soul-surfer-dude Jon Foreman wants his songs to connect: During "This Is Your Life," from 2003's The Beautiful Letdown, he climbed the stage, instructed a sing-along from the speakers, then jumped into the crowd and reached out to touch as many fans as possible. This all while belting, "This is your life / You are who you want to be!"

Jesus. Seems like he is some sort of 'prophet' who is delivering the Lord's word via alt rock vibes.

Here is video footage of a bunch of Christian alt rock bros vibing out to Switchfoot, putting 1 hand in the air, rockin' out, feeling closer 2 G-d. (NOTE: There is some fat broad 'signing' the show for the hearing impaired. Not sure if every band at Lollapalooza had this gimmick, or if it is just standard operating procedure for Christian bands/preachers.)

</embed>

Is every1 in this audience a 'Christian tool' or are they probably happier/more likely to chill in heaven than u r?

R u gonna get into Christian music?
Do u dig Switchfoot?
Did switchfoot 'sell out' by going mainstream?
Is Christian music gonna be big in 2k12?
Does Christian alt rock outsell indie buzzbands?
Should all bands work Christian themes in2 their music?
Should I start a buzzband called 'Killin It' so that every blurb about my live band's live show can say that we 'killed it'?
Do u believe in God?
Should religious bands stick 2 their own festivals, and take their messages elsewhere?
Do u feel bad for people who listen to Christian rock, like they are living in some Middle American 3rd World Country?
Should I become an alt rock Christian bro, getting buff and wearing graphic tees that depict biblical images in a 'kewl way'?

NYTimes writes article about Christian counseling 4 female porn addicts, includes photo of hipster porn addict


I don't think this post is even really that relevant. The NY Times wrote an article about female pornography addiction counseling. I don't think they really 'care about' porn addiction like it is a real problem, but it seems like something that could get a lot of hits, since it involves religion, females, and pornography. It also really helped that they had a photo of an entry-level alt girl as the physical representation of female porn addiction. Do u think she uses her keffiyeh as a cum rag?

I wonder if the journalist who wrote this had 'a laugh riot' when he/she attended one of these counseling sessions. Seems like it must have been crazy to go 2 Kansas 2 see this go down:

LENEXA, Kan. — It was the final session for the women at Westside Family Church’s Victory Over Porn Addiction group, and the youngest member, a 17-year-old named Kelsie, had not had a good week.

“I slipped two nights this week,” she said, to nods of support from the other women in the group.

“I decided that every time I’m tempted I’ll just let everything out to God,” she said, “then pray specifically for someone else, do selfless acts, to get away from being selfish.”

Damn. R u a Christian?
Do u watch porn?
How do u know if you are addicted to porn?

For the graduation ceremony, Ms. Renaud passed out balloons and asked the group to write down the things they were giving up. Out came the bad stuff: Porn, Masturbation, Lustful Thinking, Cutting, Feeling Useless, Dad’s Bad Choices, Self-Gratification, Self-Mutilation, Unhealthy Thoughts.

They finished by popping the balloons and hugging. Ms. Renaud allowed that the culture’s forces were against them.

“This group should be much larger, but they’re afraid to come forward,” she said. Even after seven years without pornography, she told the group, looking at it too long it might attract her. Recently, she said, she watched “Titanic,” including the nude scene, without a relapse.

Is this 'kinda like a Daily Show segment' except in written format?
Have u ever masturbated to the nude scene in Titanic?
What's the most amount of times u masturbated in 1 day?
R u addicted to porn?
Have u ever written all of ur problems on a balloon, then popped it to metaphorically represent 'overcoming' personal demons / problems?

Are all entry level alt girls from Kansas addicted 2 porn?
Can God help u get over any addiction?

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