Yall. I pretend 2 ‘follow fashion’ and ‘know a lot about fashion design’ sometimes, and I have heard of some bro named KARL LAGERFELD. I don’t really ‘know what he does’ but I think he is ‘relevant.’ He seems to maintain some sort of brand that is similar to ‘the bad guy in a movie’ or something like that. I am not sure how long he has ‘been around’ or ‘what he has done for fashion.’

Think he might be somewhere inbetween ‘an old Mark Jacobs’ / ‘the ghey, lovable guy from Project Runway.’

Sometimes I feel like an uncultured suburban kid. Not even sure if I will wear any of his designs unless he does some Am Appy work. Sort of hope I get him as a teacher next year when I start at Parsons.

does n e 1 know this bro?
Does n e 1 know if alternative people are going to start dressing him, kinda like the M.I.Alt or the Viva La VidAlt or even the Ryan Adams Look Alike Bag??

‘I used 2 rule the world.’
-the Coldplays

Photo via the Minneapoline

ugh. h8 fashion.
who am I supposed 2 b?
’sometimes feelin like life is just a circus, yall!’ -brit spearsie

Question 2) M.I.A. is

a) just a meme
b) pregant
c) should have stayed home
d) trying too hard 2 reach out 2 mainstream audiences
e) just taking care of herself/her career

Question 3: Deadmau5 will be remembered as

a) a zany masked DJ
b) just some weirdo at the Grammys
c) “what is that bro doing at our show?” -Taylor Swift
d) being responsible for bringing ‘masked djs’ to the mainstream
e) just a meme on the day after award shows

Question 4: This is a picture of

a) the coldplays
b) a band that steals songs
c) the writers of the rock album + song of the year
d) bros who need to retire their gimmick
e) Cool dads searching for meaning

Question 5: These bros are chilling at

a) the Grammys
b) A Cool Dad convention
c) A Kidz Health convention
d) A McDonalds playgrond
e) A liberal arts professor conference

Question 6: When I see this single, I think it is

a) Just another bloghouse mp3
b) just another crappy mp3 posted by a lame entrylevel blog on the hypemachine looking to get hits
c) worth a Grammy
d) the best Remix of all time
e) other

Question 7: Kanye West won a grammy for

a) Best frollet
b) Best blogger of the year
c) Worst black person of the year in America
d) JackOfAllTrades/Renaissance Man of the year
e) Best guy who sounds like a robot on his albums

Question 8: Who wore it better?

a) the broad on the left
b) the broad on the right
(this is a test 2 see if ur a racist)

Question 9: The Lonely Island Bros are

a) going to win a Grammy in 2k10
b) a gimmick for bros
c) comedy for bros
d) glorified bro Weird Al bullshit
e) really funnie
f) really progressive
g) going to make the Flight of the Conchords obsolete for bros
h) something for people who smoke weed and watch dvds/ funnie youtube vids

Question 10: This bro won a Grammy for

a) best assault of a broad
b) best knuckle sandwich 2 a broad’s face
c) Best job of ‘putting a woman in her place’
d) Most likely 2 be the next OJ Simpson
e) Future Ike TurnerBro
f) Strongest Pimp Hand
g) Artist of the Millennium who Hits Women
h) Bro Who is above the law
i) bro who is above society’s norms

Question 11: Daft Punk won some Grammy because

a) they deserve it for this live album thingy
b) there are too many Awards categories
c) people only heard of them after Kanye West cobranded with them for that meaningful duet about becoming stronger on the inside

Question 12: Christian Bale won a grammy for

a) being Heath Ledger’s BFF
b) being in Batman
c) becoming a viral meme on audio
d) pretending ‘to get angry’ as a marketing gimmick for the new Terminator film so that Entertainment Magazines will profile him as being ‘complex’ and ‘deep’ and ‘really into his craft’
e) he sang a lot in Newsies

Question 13: The name of this band is

a) 3 Tweens and a Blind Black Man
b) Blind, Black, and Musical: The Band
c) Searching for Our Sexuality thru the blindness
d) Bro Circle Jerk in a room with a blindman
e) Guy Who Should be able to see + need Talent Managers who protect their brands a lil bit better
f) The Grammys: Where Legends go to Make Bad Decisions
g) Steve WonderBro
h) Tweens Who Might be GheyBros

Question 14: This band in this picture is

a) the Spice Girls
b) Paramore
c) Blink 182
d) Girls Aloud
e) The Pussy Cat Dolls
f) Aqua
g) Jen Aniston and the Skanky McSkankBroads
h) Chris Brown’s “Pimp Hand”

Can’t believe I missed the Grammys. Feel really ‘out of the loop.’ Just want to connect 2 ‘pop culture’ since it is kind of the fabric of society that relates us all.

Kinda feel like this picture represents the state of modern music.
In this picture is everything that we want.
We want bloggable content with stars who attract viewers by saying zany things and being progressive enough to blurb about.

Did yall hear M.I.A. is pregnant?
Are yall excited about how twitter gives u such direct and instant access 2 ur fave celebs while they are at a meaningful event like the Grammys?

[via diplo's drunken memes during the Grammys blogspottwitter]

/// Just want 2
/// look at shit
/// that looks ‘cool’
/// on the internet
/// then re-blog it
/// making my own blog
/// look ‘cooler’
/// we are branding 2gthr

////////////////////
Animal Collective – My Girls

It’s always interesting when a widely respected band makes a ‘mediocre conceptual video’ that is excessively ‘praised’/'meme-ed’ as an extension of the band. Kinda boring video, never really ‘goes anywhere’, and just makes you think about how ‘uninteresting’ AnCo are as humans. Sure they ‘make good/relevant music’, but videos like this make u wish they ‘had more to offer’ as humans/ambassadors of some ‘message.’ But I guess that’s why it is easy to ‘like’ them since they are ‘just music-making bros’ and not Bono/Chris Martin/Ricky Martin/Brandon Flowers/Susan Sarandon/ Ben Gibbard / Kanye West, etc.

Overall just kinda tired of reading reviews/hearing dbags say that Animal Collective’s music is ‘textural’, and this video kind of just reminds me of how much i h8 pre-modern music criticism / when people try to describe the non-aural elements of sound (if they exist). But ya. the video is s0000 textural, just like their music.

N e ways, do yall like AnCo showcasing their meaningful technological instruments in this vid?

/////////////////////
Friendly Fires – Skeleton Boy

I liked this vid/song more than I liked the “My Girls” experience. It makes me feel more ‘alive’, and ‘looks cooler’ than the AnCo video. Sometimes, u just have 2 admit that some things are ‘cooler’ than other things, and ‘coolness’ is the most important thing sometimes. The song kind of makes me want to ‘buy a car’ after being inspired by an upbeat/meaningful/dancey song in a commercial.

//////////
The Coldplays – Some song about Puppets

Coldplay has a pretty interesting existence as a ‘globally recognized band’ because they don’t really have a vision of ‘what they want to be as a band’–instead, they just kind of re-use already accepted concepts/ideas that were already executed by highly regarded bands and artists. I wonder what ‘the mainstream world’ is looking for when they decide to ‘honor’ the Coldplays as a relevant/listenable band.
Can’t believe they are sticking to the ‘colonial war’ uniform gimmick [via puppets].

“I used 2 rule the world.” – George W. Bush + The Coldplays duet

//////////
BUT SRSLY
Which conceptual music video do yall ‘like’ the most?
Or is ‘the music video’ a dead art form?
In the future, will all music vids look like iPod commercials/capture the same positive consumer-core zeitgeist?

Just wanted 2 share a meaningful art & craft with u. I know every1 is pumped about Barres Obama getting into the ‘Black House’, so thought I might share this tribute art & craft challenge.

What u need:

• Crayola Markers
• Military Costume from the 1700s.
• Swaddling Cloth or miscellaneous wrapping cloth
• Leader with a catchy name who represents hope

Step 1: Put on ur jacket. Write a song abt how ‘u used 2 rule the world.’
Step 2: Wrap a lil cloth around your arm, making a meaningful arm band
Step 3: Figure out a creative way 2 symbolize/create a tribute 2 some1 who represents something that you want 2 ‘let the world know that u appreciate.’
Step 4: Talk 2 people abt ur art & craft. How u made it. Why u made it. All that kinda stuff.

This is your what your final product should look at.

Does n e 1 know what this stands 4?

Should I make 1 for my blog website?

Email me if yall have n e good recipes, arts & crafts ideas, or other authentic d.i.y. procedures. Think I’m gonna stop blogging about alt crap and start blggng about meaningful crafts, etc.

Or should I just buy Hot Topic / emo /mainstream bro wristbands?

Or stick with LIVINGSTRONG?

Or just fake an injury to get attention and have people who would never ordinarily talk 2 me ’sign my cast’?

Miss u Gwenny

“I used to rule the world.” -Coldplay
“It was all yellow.” – Coldplay
“The Scientist, yall.” – Coldplay

Rlly eggcited abt the grammies, yall. Hope Coldplay wins. I think that would mean that ‘alt’ has officially overtaken the mainstream.

In honor of Coldplay, I will post the top albums in 2k8 that were purchased on the internet music shoppe called ‘iTunes.’

2008′S ITUNES TOP ALBUMS

Do yall use iTunes?
Should I buy more music from iTunes since they give like 80% of profits to the artists?
Should I do blow off my iPhone?

• conceptual
• earnest
• meaningful
• arty
• artsy
• artistic
• have a direct relation to my alternative lifestyle
• retro
• modern
• postmodern
• campy
• serious
• not designed to ‘go viral.

Which artist has the most authentic music video aesthetic?

Is it M83 with their 80s video camera music videos?

M83 – “Graveyard Girl”

Or maybe it’s Thieves Like Us with their earnest music videos that remind us what it of what it meant to be young & authentically care about things/relationships.

Thieves Like Us – Desire

It’s DEFINITELY NOT Ratatat with their College Video Art Project Aesthetic. (If I wuz their professor, I would give them a pity “B-.”)

Ratatat – “Schempi”

Coldplay’s “Viva La Vida” utilizes a Photoshop Smoke Effect. Do yall know how to use photoshop to make ur youtube videos look like children’s boox?

Coldtug – “Viva La Vida, Yall”

I feel like at this point, it might be Frankmusik. In this video he utilizes the post-pop Tom Hanks in the movie BIG dancing on neon piano keys aesthetic.

Frankmusik – “Three Little Words”

Should I Blog more about Thomas Hanks / dancing on supersized piano keys?

Which post-bloghaus/indierock/meaningfulcore band has the most authentic video aesthetic?
What do yall look for in quality videos?
Should pitchfork.tv merge with youtube or vimeo?
Should vimeo merge with youtube or xtube or porn0t00b?
What makes a music video meaningful 2 u?

Sigur Ros

Coldplay

I wonder what they are fighting for/against?
I wonder what Coldplay’s colours mean?
Do any other bands dress like they are going to war against something meaningful?

I wonder if Tom Morello is still fighting in a war against ’stuff that is wrong with the world, like capitalism, Republicans, George Bush Jr, and other stuff where poor people don’t get to listen to faggy electro, rap-rock, or mainstream alt-rock every day.’

Does n e 1 know what Che Guevara fought for? I have a poster of him chillin in my room. He smokes dank, right?

I can understand when bands wear one colour, or have a certain fashion gimmick, but SRSLY, what r they fighting for?
Why don’t I ‘get’ things that are intended to be meaningful & present commentary on the way the world is so crazy, kind of like a war, and stuff like that.

EDITOR’S NOTE:
SRRY ABT THE LACK OF UPDATES. I WAS MOVING INTO MY DORM ROOM AT PARSONS THIS WEEKEND. S0 EMOTIONAL SAYING GOODBYE TO MY PARENTS. LOVE ALL YALL. THANKS FOR ALL OF THE COLLEGE TIPS.

Whenever one of these indie bands releases an album, people are like ‘omg! I can’t believe it’s #1 on iTunes! WTF? They r indie! I used to listen 2 them, but not any more.’ When it comes to music that white people listen to, I think popular mainstream and indie bands are fighting against all of that Soulja Boy type of stuff, so it’s probably time for them to unite into one genre.

MEANINGFUL-CORE MUSIC: Presented by HIPSTER RUNOFF

MEANINGFUL-CORE music can be described as
1. music that makes a general mainstream consumer think that his/her life is more meaningful
2. music that an alt or mainstream person can talk about in a conversation and make them seem ‘with the times’, ‘interesting’, and ‘on a quest for self-awareness.’
3. music that is structured to seem directly meaningful, cryptically meaningful, or if the singer just looks/sounds earnest and meaningful in some form
4. music that is made by a predominantly male band, with a male lead singer (the voice of a male offers more meaning than a female can offer)
5. music that is created by a band who ‘meant it’ on their first album, then experimented, then ‘got mainstream’, then ‘meant it’ in a cool-dad kind of way later in their career. (no matter what, they always sold out large venues)
6. music that music critics respect, and you can put on a mix CD for a person of the opposite sex to make them think that you ‘understand love, life, and everything else that could make a relationship work.’

I think meaningful-core can help explain how the popular mainstream bands and popular indie bands have merged into this one classification. Zach Braff was an innovator by lumping meaningful-core hits into the Garden State soundtrack. At that time, consumers began to think that the music within their iPod should ‘give them a more meaningful soundtrack for their lives’.’ Each song can make an event like looking out a car window seem really amazing.

DCFC: they look like they really ‘mean it.’

Meaningful-core bands can take your existence to the next level. They will help you relate to more people who are searching for meaning in their lives’. Meaningful-core will help you connect with impending sexual partners in a meaningful-kind-of-way. Their albums are important snap shots of the global economy of feelings.

Other bands or artists can have a ‘meaningful core hit’, but it doesn’t always mean that their other stuff will be interpreted as ‘meaningful on a mass scale.’ For example, that Iron and Wine dude covered ‘Such Great Heights’, but I think only girls liked that song and that guy. A band like Death Cab can gimmick mainstream bros and entry-level altbros in with lyrics like, ’so this is the New Year… and I don’t feel any different. :-( ‘

Meaningful-Core bands are able to transcend our society as a whole. They transcend media outlets, and they re-think ‘antiquated methods of album distribution.’ They have a sea of fans who are into being their fans. They have street teams.

Americans first learned that Coldplay was [Highly meaningful] when the music video for ‘Yellow’ showcased a rising sun throughout the duration of the video.

Subgenres of meaningful core:
Cryptically meaningful bands in an artsy-ish way
(These bands may or may not achieve success in sales, but garner a lot of critical acclaim for being really meaningful)
1. Sigur Ros
2. The Microphones
3. Animal Collective/Panda Bear
4. The Avalanches
5. Boards of Canada
6. The Books
(These bands appeal to people who want meaning through conceptual stuff that is less approachable to mainstreamers.)

Earnest Electro meaningful
(After people ‘fell in love with the Postal Service’ they were searching for some replacements of earnest electronic music.)
1. The Notwist
2. The Go Find
3. Air
4. Frou Frou
5. Lali Puna
6. only the song “Digital Love” by Daft Punk
7. Only the song “some one great” by LCD soundsystem

“leave me paralyzed, love” – the Notwist

Mainstream rock bands that add ‘meaning’ to mainstreamers who think they are really unique in a ‘I still wear a ying yang necklace’ kind of way
1. Incubus
2. Linkin Park
3. Creed (R.I.P.)
4. Tool

******
The Shins sing that 1 song about Caring being Creepy, right? Soo true (and so random)

******

So in conclusion, people are looking for meaning in their lives’. They want to know why they are here, and why their perspective is more special than yours or mine. Music offers a wide range of products that can help users believe that they are more unique, more authentic, more alterntive, more mainstream, and more intrinsically meaningful. While we all have different interpretations of ‘what it means to mean something meaningful’, we can all find an artist that helps us to feel like we truly connect with what it is that connects those of us who ‘understand the human condition.’

Meaningful-core songs are in 25% of iPod commercials. (25% is dedicated to upcoming female stars, and 50% is dedicated to ‘dancey fun stuff that alternative people listen to.)

Filling this iPod with meaningful-core music could make your head start secreting the gel-form of meaningfulness.

Plz elaborate on or refine any theories proposed in this bl0g p0st.
<3 yall r smart. Yall should be consultants 4 EMI/Geffen/SubPop/XL <3
<3 When Soul Meets Body <3

What’s the deal with their song ‘Viva La Vida’? I feel like it’s a song that people would cream their pants over if the Arcade Fire sang it, but instead, people will say ‘it doesn’t sound enuff like CLOCKS, which I played on the piano at my high school talent show.’

Who IS the next U2?

I think the most important part about Radiohead giving away their “In Rainbows” for free is that they avoid being every other major band that will look bad when they only give away one track for free.

That being said, I can’t believe Coldplay only gave away 1 single for free. They only care about making money. I wish they’d get back to their roots, and write songs more like “Yellow,” or maybe experiment with bangers.

What’s ur fave Coldplay video? The one where the sun comes up? Or the one where Chris Martin’s GF flies through a windshield in reverse slow motion?

What do the following popular artists have in common?

a) They are all having remix contests
b) They all have recently released albums
c) Their record companies deposited an undisclosed sum in the creator of HypeMachine’s off shore bank account.

HIPSTER RUNOFF: The World’s Only Source for Hype Machine Analysis