HIPSTER RUNOFF

Photos via the cobrasnake

I remember when digital cameras first came out. Every one was 'pumped', thinking things like 'I don't have to take my disposable camera to get developed any more.' The advent of an affordable digital camera was almost as liberating as when God invented 'the mp3' and we didn't have to buy music any more. We all thought 'we can capture as many moments as we want, snap all of our friends, and never forget anything for the rest of our lives, and we get to do this by saving money on bullshit like film and going 2 the grocery store to get the film developed.' (Ppl get rlly excited when they think that their lives' are becoming 'better' while they are 'saving money.')

Unfortunately, the digital camera experience is no longer authentic. U r just '1 of many ppl trying 2 capture life with a camera.' Ultimately feel like it is a bad thing that so many ppl have the capability of 'capturing moments 4evr.'

It is sad that the digital camera experience is no longer an 'authentic one' because too many people have them. Because too many people have cameras, too many digital images exist. Because so many digital images exist, posted in places like facebooks, blogs, twitpics, and flickrs, all images became less meaningful. This falls in line with the Theory of Authenticity.

(this theory also applies 2 'so many ppl ruining social networks', and 'so many fans ruining bands')

Because so many digital images exist, there is no point in even taking a picture. Whether it is a picture of your friends, family, an artistic shot on your trip to NYC, or an image out the window of the airplane while you are flying, your images are less meaningful. You should stop trying to take pictures. Also feel sad that it's sooo EZ 2 jam a camera into a phone. Seems less meaningful when you turn a technological item into a 'combo', sorta like those DVD player + VHS player 'combos' that old people got bc they wanted to make sure that their VHS movies were still 'useful.'

I honestly feel superior to mainstream point-and-shoot camera owners. Totes h8 'mainstream bitches' who take pix in bars, and then will crop their friends out of the picture just so that they can have a sweet facebook user pic. Also the 'bros who take pix at concerts and then post them 2 their facebook 2 show how close 2 the band they were.' Digital Cameras just became 'too mainstream' when they became 'affordable' for parents to buy for their tween kids as a 'solid birthday/xmas gift.' Seems like something that 'frugal, manipulative' parents would buy for their kids now, wanting their kids to think that they 'spent a lot of money on them, and really sacrificed 4 their happiness.'

S000 tired of ppl thinking 'making fun of myspace style pix' is revolutionary comedy.

From what I understand myspace is now a 'digital graveyard', and only the blacks, latino gheys, and white tweens who live in rural areas and haven't received the message that ppl use 'twitbook' now.

I seriously think I'm going to 'destroy' my point-and-shoot camera [via putting it on ebay] and using money to buy 'marijuana cigarettes' and 'cocaine bumps.'

Really miss the 'thrill' of consumer technology when ur on the forefront of it. Like the first time u went to 'youtube.com' and searched for something zany and random, and thought 2 urself 'this is gonna be the start of something...and I'm definitely 1 of the first ppl 2 find out abt it. I'd better tell a bunch of ppl abt it so that they know that they learned it from me.'

Just need 2 admit that I don't use technology bc it makes my life better--I used it bc it seems to make me 'kewler' if I have it 1st.

Photo via Gizmodo

Sometimes I see stuff
that I think looks meaningful
and wish I could take a picture of it
capturing the moment/meme forever

Every day I see thousands of images
and some of them are 'meaningful'
or 'get my attention'
and other ones are 'meaningless'
and somewhat 'forgettable.'

Sometimes I wonder
what is the most authentic photograph in the history of the entire world?

Is it a photo of a human?
Maybe a bro like Jesus
Abe Lincoln / Obama
OJ Simpson / Jimi Hendrix
Harvey Milk / Sean Penn as Harvey Milk
some anonymous bro
like a soldier or victim of war or something.
Maybe an animal
or some ppl 'mating' [via porn]

Is it a photo of an event
like a plane crashing into a building
or some sort of festival in a 3rd world country
or like some zany event like 'the running of the bulls'

Or is it a picture of something that most people will never see
like some sort of entity that exists 'in space'
or 'a lunar/solar eclipse'
or a 'screen capture of something funnie.'

Or is it a party pic?
Like some bro with a ginger peen
Or some 'skank in a bathroom'
Or an entry level alt
or a super sweet 15 party 4 alts

Should we stop appreciating photos
and start to embrace 'video'
Worried that I am missing out on 'what makes a picture beautiful'
Might buy a huge DSLR or something
so that I can take HI RESOLUTION N00DZ
And license them to Am Appy 4 advertising

What is the most beautiful picture in the history of the world, yall?

Photo by Lookbook

Yall, I was tweenhunting on lookbook, and I came across this beautiful young woman with some sort of gadget by her face. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to tell if this is some sort of 'retro gadget' or if it is like a cutting edge new wave gadget. H8 the modern world, and how I can't even stay 'up to date' with new consumer technology blogs.

Is this gadget
a) a vision test machine
b) an iPod shuffle
c) Oakleys with an MP3 player built in
d) a digi camera
e) an iPhone
f) an iPhone shuffle
g) a mixtape player
h) a muxtape player
i) peeping tom binoculars
j) an RSS reader
k) Am Appy X-Ray goggles
l) the new Macbook Lite
m) a smart car
n) Wayfarers
o) shuttershades
p) slanties
q) Wall-E's decapitated head
r) a tamagachi
s) a polaroid camera
t) a lomography camera
u) Choose.Your.Own.Response

??????

Just trying 2 stay modern. Might use a Best Buy Gift Certificate 2 buy 1 of them if it turns out 2 be the 'must-have' item of 2k9.5.

I have always wanted to show the world what is inside of me. I want them to know 'who I am' and 'what I am made out of.' While I often approach this from a 'personality-based' perspective, maybe I should start trying to convey to the world what is inside of me (physically). If I can find a tattoo artist/doodler who is willing to tattoo all of my organs+skeletal system on me, then I will be 'transparent.' People will know that I am human after all.

2k9 may or may not be all about 'getting back 2 basics' 2 find out that 'we are all the same' from a biological/anatomical perspective because we don't want 2 seem like 'care about' 'material things' like fashion/trends/social status.

My other Rebranding option is getting a tattoo of all of the things I own on my body.

[via wemadeoutonce]
I think the task of tattooing all of my personal belongings on to my body might be tedious. For example, will I still be using a Macbook in 1-10 years? Will I still have my Blackberry Razr? Will I still be ordering pizza from Papa Johns? Will my TV only be a 104 inch flat screen in 2k40? I need 2 figure out how long I plan on being alive, and then predict which products will still be in my life in 2k__. How dumb would I have looked if I had a can of SPARKS tattied on my palm?

If I am scared to get a tattoo because of the 'pain', I might just morph into a digital camera. This would make me a CameraBro. I think having the opportunity to be 'half-human-half-technology' would be kinda like being a robot, except without 'losing ur sense of humanity/emotion/feelings that humans experience.' There are a lot of movies that have robots who 'want 2 b human bc they can't feel emotions', but if I were just 50% camera and 50% bro, I think I could

I still have 2 decide whether I want 2 morph into a Point-And-Shoot Camera or a dSLR. Point-and-shoots are kinda entry level at this point. If I choose to be a dSLR, I think I will have more opportunities to implement other accessories, like flashes and lenses. However, being a point-and-shoot means that I will be really portable, and won't be a huge douchebag. I just need 2 make sure that I come with a pre-installed way to upload my photos 2 the web [via flickr/photobucket/ tinypic/facebook/cobrasnakeHTMLgenerator/etc.]

What do yall value in a digicam?

Do yall know what I should do to upgrade my personal brand in 2k9?

[via lookbook]
I have been asking for a new camera for the past year.
This Christmas, I finally received one.
This Christmas, my life Changed.

(I actually already had a camera, but the resolution wasn't high enough for my needs)

My camera will travel with me everywhere.
It will be your gateway to my perspective of the world.
What I find meaningful
will be captured
forever

What I find meaningful
will exist
until my hard drive crashes

What I see
is what I find meaningful
because my eyes
are seeing it
and my heart
is feeling it
and my mind
is thinking it
and my me
is being it.

I like the way I look
I like the way my friends look
I like the way my city looks
I will create a picture
which represents my life

This bro is me.
This bear mask may or may not be a metaphor

I can take a picture of all nouns.

One day I will tire of digital photography
and 'get back to basics.'
While my pictures will not be
easy to share with friends and family
[via popular photo sharing websites]
If a photo is unsharable,
does that make it more personal,
therefore
more meaningful to me?

Digital Photography will not meet my needs
I want
instant gratification
[via printed out photo]

I will pin these photos on my wall
or put them on my dashboard
or put them in a photo album
that only 5 people will see
gathering dust on a shelf
(Part of the photo hardcopy never dies)

I will take a photo of
last night's party
last night's meaningful convo
last night's night drive
last night's wardrobe
last night's face hunt
last night's face hunting cobrasnake
last night's last night

I recently received a new camera.
Next year my parents will buy me an accessory for my camera
which allegedly makes it more 'practical'
if u live [via the past]

The camera is my mirror
It is my pen // I am a writer
The camera is my livejournal
The camera is my blogspot
The camera is my xanga
The camera is my wordpress
The camera is my tumblr
The camera is my twitpic
The camera is my myspace
The camera is my facebook
The camera is my friendster
The camera is my personal brand
The camera is my internet brand
The camera is my youtube account
The camera is my google image search
The camera is my 'hot hot sex'
The camera is my phone.
/// // ////
Does my phone have a camera in it?
Or does my camera have a phone in it?
Or does my Macbook have a phone in it?
Or does my Mac have a photobooth in it?
Or does my Skype have a vlog in it?
Or does my _____ have a ______ in it?
(This is a metaphor and/or post-rhetorical question.)

This is AltBrodom in a single photograph.
This is alternative camaraderie.
This is what it means to pick out your neon accessories with one of your best bros.
This is what it means to follow blogs with your best altBros, and get 'totally hyphy crunk' whenever a new track by _____ drops.
This is what it means to look over at your best altBro with excitement all over your face when you hear the first distorted chord/riff at a _____ show.
This is what it means to drive 100+ miles to see your favourite bloghaus act.
This is alternative bro.

A lot of people who just bought a digital camera wonder 'What makes a good photograph?' They wonder why there are professional photographers who get paid to do what they do. The truth is, 'photography' isn't just about what YOU see, it's about what EVERY ONE can see. Were u able to capture a moment in time that represents something that humanity as a whole can relate to?

For example, this picture could be passed down from generation to generation when lil alts in 2k70 ask 'Grampy, what was an AltBro'?

This picture is worth 1,000 blog posts.

When some ass hole creates an 'alt museum' in the middle of the United States, this picture will be blown up to cover up a whole wall. Kinda like how this picture represents ww2.

And this picture represents the War with Osama & Obama

And how this picture represents America

/////////////////////////////
XX BONUS FUN GAME XX
////////////////////////////
The winner gets 50 HRO points.

PUZZLE: In this picture, do u see m0re altBros or m0re digital cameras?

[Photos by the Laperolog]