HIPSTER RUNOFF

Sometimes I wonder if I should marry a man or a woman. I think it would be great to provide a traditional heterosexual environment for my impending spawn so that they would feel like they 'fit in' at school. But then there is also the option of settling down with a GHEY bro. I think that 2 cool dads could provide a positive environment without the shortcomings & insecurities of a female.

100 Simple Rules For Raising my Alternative Child

• When I am a father, I will not let my kid watch television.
• I will only let my son/daughter watch vimeo.
• My kids will only listen to podcasts.
• My kids will only eat Kashi brand products and no red meat.
• When they are fully grown into tweens, I will remove meat from their diet.
• My kids will not learn how to write in print or cursive. I will give them a Macbook Air with only a single font available for use--Helvetica.
• My kids will not learn how to play the guitar or piano, but I will hire some one to teach them Ableton.
• I will not let my kids vlog until they are 19.
• I will monitor my kids' personal brand, not letting them commit to any trends that will be eliminated within 1.5 years.
• My kids will be homeschooled. They will not read textbooks--only wikipedia entries and blog posts.
• 80% of my children's curriculum will be for the sake of self-expression.
• Other kids will not 'get' my children, but I will teach my kids that this means that they are better than mainstreamer children who eat refined sugar.
• My kids will go to the top design/art schools in the world. I will let them take a year off, but make sure they are 'doing something free spirited and constructive.'
• My kids will be tolerant. They will create pro-Ghey signs.
• My kids will live in a world without Comic Sans.

I want to be the most effective alternative father in the history of the world.
How will u raise ur kids?

SRSLY tho... is love ever wrong? (gonna miss the gheys after George Bush eliminates them the day b4 he leaves office.)

Should I blog about social change/parenting tips more often?

Do yall think it was unfair that they left 'GHEY ROBIN' out of The Dark Knight just to make money? I understand that mainstream audiences are unfamiliar with 'the ghey community', but there comes a time when we need to be a lil bit more tolerant.

But SRSLY...is being 'ghey' a choice, or r u born with it kinda like how a spider knows how to create 'web 2.0' right when they come out of the womb?

[Photo by The Friend Attack]

Hasn't ROBIN always been 'a lil bit bi'?

N e ways...kinda buzzed on a Sparks Martini right now. Every time I 'check out' a girl who is kute, her background morphs into the shirt that she's wearing, kinda like Zach Braff in Gardy State. Is this what 'the LSD' feels like?

What are yall doing this weekend? Oh kewt I'm seeing Girl Talk/MGMT too.

Is Scandinavian Pop rlly that good? I seem to prefer it when it is lipsynched by two sexually ambiguous outgoing scene bros with Tegan & Sara haircuts.

<3 Dramatic headturns + ironed hair + scene bros = HEAVEN <3

Their effort is actually a mammoth landmark in capturing the GHEYNESS of the original video for Alphabeat's "Fascination." The bro in this band looks like he is squeezing out a kute, pastel-coloured turd while he sings.

For every "Young Folks," there are thousands of "Fascination"s that leave u wondering why some people think it's so c00l to love Scandy Pop. Would u rather listen to BANGERS for the rest of ur life, or Scandinavian Pop?

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY...
What's the difference between scene and alt?

These two alternative mainstream girls love their Big Ghey Uncle because:
a) he takes them to PinkBerry to talk about their problems!
b) they wear the same kute clothes since their uncle has the self-concept of a 15 year old girl
c) they hang out together on myspace and try to get hot guys to send them cock pix.
d) he convinced their moms to let them put a streak of pink/blue/green in their hair
e) they get to practice giving him tugjobs, but it doesn't matter cuz he's ghey
f) He buys them 6-packs of wine coolers on the weekends
g) Choose.Your.Own.Response

I post a lot of lezbos, AZNs, and plain white chicks with bangs, but I haven't posted many black people. And I don't post enough homosexual males. Just felt like 'killin 2 b1rdz w/ 1 st0ne', if you know what I mean.

Do black people read HRO? Or is HRO still too racist?

[Photo by SharkVsBear]

What is a blipster?
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=blipster

Who the hell says BLIPSTER?

Could some one do some analysis on my site readership demographics?
Are there demographics that I need to do a better job of appealing to?
Should I just forget about certain social/racial/sexual groups?

Am I REALLY A racist if the majority of my audience is the [HIGHLY COVETED] GHEY-AZN-PRETEEN-MYSPACER demographic?

[TakeMorePhotos]

Do you remember the last time you were at a concert, and you were moved to share an intimate moment with your lover?

I think the last time that happened to me was during the last 2 minutes of Interpol's "PDA" in 2002.

Since I don't talk about live music much, this post is dedicated to discussing the power of music in the live setting.

Multiple Choice (Pick One)
When was the last time you were moved by live music?
a) Gun Shots during an M.I.A. song?
b) An amazing beatmatch transition by Steve Aoki between a Soulwax RMX into a Bloc Party Remix?
c) Justice putting the "D.A.N.C.E" lyrics over "Phantom pt II"?
d) A Dan Deacon secret concert orgy that he tried to convince you was 'performance art'?
e) Making out with a 15 year old wearing American Apparel for the first time to a Girl Talk concert
f) Hearing Broken Social Scene's "Lover's Spit" for the first time when you were in a relationship with a mainstreamer searching for his/her inner-alt, and listened to Broken Social Scene + The Postal Service?
g) Taking advantage of some one on LSD at an Animal Collective concert?
h) OTHER