HIPSTER RUNOFF » Kevin Barnes

Should I have gone 2 Sasquatch Music Festival? Seems more authentic than Coachella.

Carles — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 18:39:37 +0000

Yall. I <3 music festivals. As I always say, they are the only place where I feel like I am 'home.' I get to chill with people who like like me and have similar interests, and I get to see my fave alt celebs performing/spy on them through the security gate.

Feel like I missed out on a lot of meaningful experiences.

I could have beta tested new Am Appy designs with Karen O of the Ya Yea Yeas.

Photos by Chris Graham via Brooklyn Vegan

Could have seen some zany bro.

Could have made zany faces while singing meaningful Passion Pit songs

Could have made zany faces while singing meaningful AnCo songs [via Avey Tare]

Could have made scary faces while singing with King Of Leon alphabro

Are alt music festivals all going 2 have comedy now? Might watch ADULT SWIM LIVE starring Tim and Eric. I read in a blog that they direct music videos or something.

Could have sang Karaoke with my political science professor/T.A.

Could have made angry faces about TV on the Radio’s Dave Sitek about having to play to a crowd of bros even though ur a production genius

Could have talked about music industry issues & channeling ur hurt/anger into transcendent rock anthems with Trent Reznor.

Could have chilled with Kevin ‘Bisexual JokerAlt’ Barnes during a zany OfMonty set

Could have had ‘my junk’ eaten out by a tiger

Just coulda chilled with bros, sat in the sun on a blanket, listening to some sweet, sweet alternative tunes.

Might have also met a tuggle of entry-level girls who were just under-18 who u get drunk & ‘take advantage’ of.

Whenever I miss a music festival within 3000 miles of my own home, am I missing out on one of the most potentially meaningful experiences of my life?

[Photos by Chris Graham via Brooklyn Vegan]

“Who Has the Most Authentic AltPenis?” – some FGGT

Carles — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 17:11:04 +0000

YaLL!
Just wonderin’ which popular alternative indie rock front man has the most authentic peen?

Is it Of Montreal’s Kevin Barnes’s penis?

While some artists get ‘nude’ ‘in the name of art’, we can all agree that Kevin Barnes gets n00d in the name of ‘zaniness.’

Or is it Devendra Barnhart’s penis?

“Watch out with that knife! h8 it when people slice my peen in halfsies (hotdog style cut)”

Did Devendra Barnhart steal the ‘natural’ peen aesthetic from John Lennon? Are you sad that Natalie Portman dumped him so that they couldn’t pose 2gether n00d? (wonder if she would have ‘grown out’ her ass to match Yoko Ono’s ploppy caboose)

Am I ghey for looking at other guys’s peens/johnsons/rods/zuneshafts/cobrasnakes?
Have yall seen any other altCeleb nude pix lately?

The Sexiest Man Bangs on Earth: An Open Search

Carles — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 19:04:56 +0000

Does Claudio/Ethan from Crystal Castles have the kutest Man Bangs on Earth?

HRO usually focuses on finding kute bangs on grls, but maybe it’s time to start searching for kute manbangs. Alternative men in the post-Emo era sport some of the kutest bangs evr. While swoopy bangs will always be in the spotlight, we can’t forget ’spikey bangs’, ‘bowl-cut bangs’ and any other type of innovative bangs that we might discover in the next 100 blog years.

Will ‘receding hairline bangswoops’ be big in 2k30 when alts grow up?

Remember when Of Montreal used to be the ‘Default Festival Lineup Band to Attract People Who Are Unable to Decide for Themselves What Good Music Is.’ (MGMT has taken their place.)