Yall. I know that most people who seem ‘arab’/'islam’/'muslim’/whatever generalized term for people from the Middle East-ish/India/Pakistan/Afghanny are NOT terrorists. But srsly…do yall feel like as Americans, u sort of ‘fear’ people who seem a lil bit too ethnic. Would u ever party with a bro who u racially profiled, or do u just try to party with people who are your colour + 1 blipster + 1 azn + 1 half-mexi? Do u think that ‘white people’ just manage to fit in the most?

Wonder if partying with ‘the enemy’ would land me in Guantanamo Bay [via Shawkshank/Harold and Kumar].

Wonder why I feel so obsessed with racial issues. I feel excessively paranoid, like I might be ‘racist’ deep down, and there is nothing I can do to ‘unteach’ myself.

Have u ever been boarding a flight, and u look around for the ‘bro who seems like the most likely to light his shoe-bomb on fire and take the plane down’? Feel like it is usually some sort of Arab person, or a bro who is dressed like he is from the Middle East, or a very suspicious normal looking bro who is probably some sort of medical student. I feel weird when they see u looking at them, and they are like ‘fuck u bro. I’m not a terrorist. My family is richer than urs and I have a better education than u.’ It makes me feel hella guilty.

Yall. is there something wrong with me? Or am I just ‘a stupid american’ who went 2 public school? Feel worried that I am not ‘globally aware’ enough even though I studied abroad in Europe/Boston.
Srsly though… would u partie with a terrorist? What would u do? Which terrorist would u partie with? Is George W. Bush still a terrorist, or is he a chill bro now?

Photo via Lastnightsparty

Here are some hints for yall:

• He is a ‘ghey fish.’
• He sings the song ‘How Could U be S0 Heartless?” abt dating white women
• He wrote the 2008 summer anthem “Hey Ya!”
• He wears trucker hats
• He is an artsy bro who just wants 2 be white.
• He plays for the New Orleans Saints
• He is married to Kim Kardashian
• He went into the stands to fight Detroit Pistons fans
• He was recently elected President of the United States of America
• He was the only black person to win Project Runway
• He is a socialite
• He is married to an Asian woman
• He is the star of numerous action movies
• He is releasing a rap album soon
• He is known for having a big ego

“Help a brutha out.” -blck ppl

Photo by LastNightsParty

Yall. Feel stupid to ask ‘dumb questions.’ Weird how sometimes u just never ask certain questions because you are afraid ur gonna sound stupid for not knowing, but if u asked, u’d realize that 85% of the world was wondering the same thing as u. Our modern educational system has failed because we believe that any one who asks a question is ‘an idiot’ [via Nappy Dynamite voice].

but srsly…. does n e 1 know what DJs are doing when they are ‘twisting knobs’ and ‘acting all emotional’? Like the lifeforce of a song is flowing through the knobs into their body where their soul meets their body. Wish I knew more DJ techniques. Wish my parents got me DJ lessons as a kid instead of ‘piano’/'guitar’/'miscellaneous orchestral instrument’ lessons. Sad that I was never talented enough to be in a band, so I wish I could at least play music that makes ppl happy.

Photo by sharkvsbear

While I am asking, can n e 1 else plz explain what DJs are doing when they ‘hold 1 headphone up 2 their ear while bobbing their head and looking intently at their computer screen’? Sometimes I wonder if DJs are ‘really doing anything’ or if they are sort of just ‘pretending to be really involved’ to make sure that people don’t remember that they are ‘just playing music from iTunes.’

Still not sure if DJing is an ‘art.’ Can some1 plz tell me why we need 2 respect DJs/which DJs are ‘worth respecting’? Might need to listen to more guido techno electro core house.

////////////////////////////
ANOTHER SIRIUS SATELLITE RADIO SHOW 4-6-2009

The HIPSTER RUNOFF radio show airs Mondays at noon and again at midnight EST on Sirius XMU. Iff you’re an XM subscriber, you can listen to Blog Radio on channel 43, and Sirius subscribers can still find us on channel 26. If u really want 2 hear Carles Show, u can get a 3 day trial membership.

U can always listen 2 my podcasts if ur poor.

Playlist after the jump
Au Revoir SImone – Anywhere You Looked
Phoenix – Too Young
Coconut Records – West Coast
Neon Indian – 6669 (I don’t know if you know) [MP3]
Kaiser Chiefs – Never Miss a beat (Cut Copy Remix) [link
Friendly Fires - Skeleton Boy
Hot Chip - Just Like We Breakdown (DFA Remix)
Digitalism - Apollo Gize (Breakbot remix)
Ladyhawke - Back of the Van
Grizzly Bear - Cheerleader [link]
Here We Go Magic – I Just Want To See You Underwater
Panda Bear – Bros
Foals – Big Big Love (Fig. 2)
Port O’Briend -I Woke Up Today
Deerhunter – Nothing Ever Happened
Felix Da Housecat – Ready 2 Wear
NYPC – The Bomb (Teenagers Remix)
Miami Horror – Make You Mine
Poney Poney – When Do You Wanna Stop Working (Pacific Remix) [MP3]
The Teenagers – Homecoming
Empire of the Sun – Half Mast
Holy Fuck – Balloons (Foals Cover)
AnCo – Brothersport

Just saw this bro front row at a MSTRKRFT show wearing a MSTRKRFT mask.
Kinda reminded me of the past. One time some lil altbro wore a mask of theirs, and then some time when an authentic bro wore a non-golden mask to prove that he was their biggest fan.

Still trying to figure out if it is ‘kewl’ to wear a band’s t-shirt to their concert/show. Feel like it was something that entry-levels do, but I think I might start making my own t-shirt that proves that I am a more authentic fan than every1 else.

For example, I might wear a shirt to a Panda Bear concert that says ‘We’re bros who are comfy in nautica.’ Or might wear a shirt to a MSTRKRFT concert that says ‘I listened to the one bro in ur band when he was in Death From Above 1979.’ Or might wear a shirt to a Metallica concert that says ‘h8 napster, yall!’ Or maybe will wear a shirt to a Coldplay concert that says ‘I used 2 rule the world Gwyneth Apple Yellow.’

Does n e 1 remember that song ‘Romantic Rights’ by DFA1979? Was music more authentic back then? Do u think the MSTRKRFT bro should have stayed in that band

Does n e 1 know the difference between DFA1979 and DFA Records?

Kinda wonder if it is more difficult to make a MSTRKRFT mask or a Daft Punk hemlet. Might go to a design school/technical college.
Need 2 make more arts + crafts to prove that I am a high level fan of bands that I ‘love.’ Need 2 do more 2 set myself apart from all of the ‘mainstream losers’ who go to see bands just because they think it makes them cooler and they have nothing better 2 do.

Have yall ever rlly had 2 use the restroom 2 the point that u even used a portapotty? Have yall ever entered in2 a portapotty, but then got confused about ‘how 2 use the restroom’? Just wanted to post this picture because it is ‘tuggable’, ‘dark’, ‘nonsensical’, ‘funny in a meme-ish way’, and kinda like ‘alt porn.’

Just trying 2 ‘find the hole’ 2 ‘dump’/'pee’ in. Kinda weird how we’re all so simple and we all do the same stuff. Eat, sleep, feel things, have sex, and go to the restroom.

Sometimes I wish bathrooms were as EZ 2 use as iPods. :-(

Previous girls who ‘got all confused’ in a bathroom
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/12/wtf-is-a-bathroom.html

More bathroom coverage
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/t/meet-me-in-the-bathroom

Sometimes I take life for granted. But then I stop to think about how EZ and awesome my own life is. I really don’t have much to worry about, yall. I don’t have any ‘real commitments.’ I do what I want, and I don’t owe any one anything–not even student loans.

There are people in the background of my life who make my life easier.
The men who pick up garbage.
The women who clean up hotel rooms that I metaphorically ‘trash.’
The people who work for cable/electronics/networking/computer companies who ‘make my internet/computer work’ somehow.
The janitors who clean up the bathroom/classrooms at my private school.
They are the people who put alcoholic beverages into cans and bottles.
They are the people who sew my Am Appy tshirts.
They are the unfortunate AZN pre-tweens who glue together my Nikes.
They are the people who die to donate clothes to thrift stores that I can purchase.
They are the people who carry heavy stuff like garbage, crates of Macbooks, and other crap.
They are the people who harvest organic products + drugs.
They are the people risking their lives’ to smuggle drugs to suburbia.
They are the people working ‘desk jobs that I would kill myself if I had to do’.
They are the people with jobs in 99% of industries that ‘pay well and have good benefits.’
They are people who wouldn’t even know what to do if they had the opportunity to waste time at their computer-based desk job all day.

While ur life may feel ‘menial’
and u might not even be able to grasp the concept of ‘a better life’ from my point of view,
I just want you to know that without you,
my life wouldn’t be what it is

I just want you to know
that I appreciate u
and what u have done 4 me.
I will not think about u again 4 a long time
but KNOW that u r important 2 me
and if u had a paypal account, I would donate some money.

There are people in the background
who make my life what it is.
Without them, I wouldn’t feel special
and I wouldn’t want ’something more.’

Tonight, I will have a drink in ur honor.

It was a night out with the bros. Everything was going really bro-like. We had even picked up a subGroup of bros to merge into an all out bro-pack. Spirits were bro-ish as the night progressed. We were more than just bros–tonight was a rare night where I was able to experience true brohood. I was just being a bro, grinding up on bitches and making hand signals to my bros about how ‘jacked up’ I was to be alive/at a bro-friendly club.

But then one of my bros got too bro. He drank so many shots/jaeger bombs that you would think he thought he could be bros with an alcoholic beverage. Things got way too bro way too fast. There were some nonbros there who were actually in their own bro-ternity who were acting unbrolike to our BroGroup. Needless to say, things got really unBro really fast.

All because my bro had to get all broed out.
Shit, bro.

My bro kept drinking, making all of us bros uneasy. I’m just like any other bro–all about having a good time with as many bros as possible. However, when a bro gets behind the wheel after too many drinks, he’s endangering his innerBro, as well as unknown bros on the streets. Bros don’t let bros get behind the wheel after too many bro-juices.

We tried to get my bro to give up his keys. He wasn’t very bro-ceptive to that idea. He had a very unbroistic meltdown, but eventually his body went dead. We did what any true bros would do. We came together as bros to use our brains and brawn to carry our bro to safety.

Overall, the night was pretty bro on many levels. Bro-like times with my best bros. Sometimes when you think you might not be a bro, something bro inside of u teaches u that without bros ur nothing, and everything is bro. You, bro, and every bro we know.

WWBD?
What would Bro Do?
This is what it means to be a bro.

Photo by lastnitesparty

This woman looks like
a) Uffie
b) Britt Spears ‘Baby 1 More Time Era’
c) Lovefoxxx of C.S.S.
d) The lead singer of the Ting Tings
e) Karen O
f) Celine Dion
g) Audrina Partridge
h) a Vivian Girl
i) Agyness Deyn
j) Twiggy
k) Audrey Hepburn
l) M.I.A.
m) M.I.A.’s second child
n) Jenny Lewis
o) Feist
p) Au Revoir Simone
q) Gwen Stefani
r) Lady Gaga
s) Little Boots
t) Sigourney Weaver
u) Whitney Houston
v) Nicole Richie
w) Lykke Li
x) Choose.Your.Own.Response

Can’t take my eyes off of her, yall! Driving me crazy! Who does she look like???

I think that products unify people. Some products last forever, staying relevant with each new generation. For example, most ‘normal people’ have eaten at McDonalds during their lifetime. I am trying to identify products which unify the alternative community. One product that I think most ppl have owned and built their brand around is the Chuck Taylor All Star. Not sure if ‘high tops’ were for every1, but I think most people who have wanted to build an alternative personal brand sometime in their lives’ invested $20-40 in this simple show that isn’t as comfy as people pretend it is.

Can’t believe they played basketball in these shoes back b4 I was alive. Probs resulted in a lot of shin splints/stress fractures. But I don’t think ‘black people’ were ‘flying above the rim’ back when these shoes were ‘athletic’ so maybe it was more manageable.

Just glad that this timeless, humble, unisex shoe is there for all of us. Any time I want to look like a humble, approachable alt who isn’t ‘too intimidating’ and is probably open to any sort of experience or genre of music, I put my lowtop Chuck Taylor All stars on. Think it’s kinda keut when girls wear them. Think it’s keut when mainstream tweens who are experimenting with altness wear a pair of these shoes.

Can yall think of any other products that unify the alternative population? We just have a lot in common sometimes with all genres of alt, like ‘black t-shirts’, or ‘blank CD-Rs’ or even ‘Macbooks.’ We all kinda just want the same thing, and we all have the same tools to achieve our social goals [via mall in suburbia].

“We’re all kinda the same, if u put all of the purchases during our lifetime into a big Excel spreadsheet.” – Jesus

Previous Shoe Coverage
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/08/which-shoe-company-represents-u.html
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2009/01/product-review-kanye-wests-new-zany-shoe.html
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/10/should-i-be-nike-4-halloween.html
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/08/kute-azn-of-the-day-snkr-edition.html

The baby
must be nourished
from a teet
which spouts
top shelf vodka
(This is a metaphor)