It’s kinda weird how we’re all ‘witnesses’ 2 marketing, and we are impacted by the stuff that is around us. I noticed this bro from Cleveland Ohio who had actually ‘converted his garage’ into some sort of tribute to his favourite African American athlete in the world, an NBA basketball player named LeBron James who plays in the same city. It seemed weird 2 me, mainly because sports don’t really mean anything, and I thought every1 realized that sports is just some sort of intense marketing + branding experiment for males.

Sorta wonder ‘why’ this bro felt moved to convince his parents to let him turn their garage + old ppl convertible into a LeBron James Tribute Zone. I understand ‘being a fan’ since I am theoretically a ‘fan’ of a bunch of indie bands, but I feel like this would be the equivalent of painting ur car to match the Merriweather Post Pavvy cover. It seems ‘extreme’, like instead of living ur life, you are getting too emotionally attached to the characters + brands that ’sports’ create.

I am not sure why LeBron James would ‘inspire him’ to architecturally alter his property. From what I understand, LeBron James thinks that he is a ‘chosen one’ when it comes to life. Maybe he ‘convinced every1 in Cleveland’ that he is some sort of God. (seems like a tattoo that only ‘an ass hole’ would get/only 1-4 people in the world are ‘actually qualified to receive’).

I am not sure if this tattoo means that he thinks he is ‘better than every1 else at everything’ or just at basketball. From what I understand, LBron has not won an NBA Championship and Michael Jordan won 6 of them. Kinda feel like that makes Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods and Lance Armstrong’s brands ‘legit’, since they ‘won stuff.’ Seems like Nike possibly ‘jumped the gun’ on branding LeBron James, or perhaps he is the only athlete ’simple enough’ to go along with an ‘over-the-top’ campaign in our modern world where people feel ’shitty’ after seeing some1 rub their greatness in ur face.

I feel like the entity ‘LeBron James’ is some sort of propaganda to save the psyche of people who live in Ohio. From what I understand, living in Ohio is ‘a very depressing experience’, since u are ‘trapped in ur life. I feel like Nike probably recognized the opportunity to ‘trick the people of Ohio’ into thinking that their life would be improved if LeBron James won more basketball games.

This billboard seems ‘insane.’ I feel like I would understand why some1 had a ‘warped sense of self/the world’ if they ‘green lit’ this sort of billboard.

Nike understood that it was important to reach the white t(w)een bros, and lure them with the ‘opportunity to co-brand with ‘greatness.’

I am an advocate of children participating in sports/following a favourite team for a ’sense of belonging.’ It seems way more healthy than letting your tween ‘get into the Disney brand’/Jonas Brothers/Twilight books/etc. The spirit of ’sports’ seems positive ‘on the field’, but I am scared of ‘how warped shit can get’ when it comes to uppermiddle class male teen bros who ‘think that they are the shit.’

Worried that these types of bros are the ones who ‘actually fall for sports marketing campaigns.’

Nike even paid Warren Buffet to be a ‘witness’ to this marketing scheme.

Seems like important African American artists who white ppl think are ‘kewl’ even participated in this whole ‘witness’ marketing gimmick. [via Kanye Meme]

Damn. Worried about athletes/rappers/African Americans/Nike and how they brand ‘greatness.’ I feel like the ‘zeitgeist of greatness’ is something that white males are pretty into, but I am not sure if it is a healthy concept to explore before a male is truly mature enough to understand his place in the world.

TeenBros who believe that they are ‘great’ pride themselves’ in having the latest expensive shoes.
TeenBros who believe that they are ‘great’ are never ‘team players.’
TeenBros who believe that they are ‘great’ often have bad fathers who are not grounded in reality.
TeenBros who believe that they are ‘great’ often reach their physical peak during their sophomore year in high school, then go to a subpar university in order to ‘continue playing their fave sport’ and major in some field that they honestly believe will ‘enable them to stay close to the game that they love’, including ’sports medicine’, ’sports business’ and ’sports marketing.’
If my son is a sports bro, I will monitor the influence of marketing on his psyche. Mainstream Teens are impressionable too.

I don’t want my son to evolve into a TeenBro who thinks he is ‘great.’ I just want him to be happy 4 the right reasons, even if that means he ‘plays in the High School Jazz Band’/a local ska band (maybe not).

Should I convince my parents to convert my garage into a tribute 2 ______________?

This post is intended to appeal to the sportsbro and post-teensportsbro demographic.

Yall. I feel confused when I see these Nike gladiator shoes. I think that they are supposed to be ‘athletic’ but also ‘trendy.’ I am not sure if they were designed to give your feet/body adequate support. I think it might be for people who are ‘only interested in looking kewl’ but also possibly for ‘people who play xtreme sports.’ Haven’t really followed Xtreme Sports since Tony Hawk died in a skateboarding accident-prank with Tom Green.

These gladiator Nikes are for:
a) streetwear urban bros
b) streetwear urban bros from suburbia/Los Angeles
c) LeBron James
d) Kobe Bryant
e) replacing the ‘chill soccer sandal’
f) going to build a time machine and sell them 2 actual gladiators
g) something about the show “AMERICAN GLADIATORS”
h) wrestlers [via Mickey Rourke/Brooke Hogan]
i) boxers [via Manny "Pac Man" Pacquiao]
j) the homosexual demographic
k) the now-defunct ‘metrosexual’ demographic
l) bros who wear Ed Hardy
m) bros who want to look chill but also be ready to fight
n) giving away for free at Coachella Pool Partie
o) black people
p) Choose.Your.Own.Response

Confused about gladiator sandals/shoes.
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/t/gladiator-shoes

Not sure who I even am any more, and what brand represents me the most/best.

‘ugh’. Think that sometimes I assume that everything Kanye West makes is ‘beautiful art’ and don’t realize that he is actually just ‘trying to make money’, or what rappers call ‘hustling.’

Feel manipulated. It’s kinda like when I see a beautiful logo that I would consider getting as a tattoo, but then I realize that it is part of a global brand. Thought I was gonna get this tattoo, but then I realized it belonged to CHILI’s.

(Fortunately, I found out that it is a kick ass restaurant.)

In my digital art class, I actually made a symbol that looked like the ‘Nike Swoosh’ without even ever seeing it. I thought it was beautiful, but then my classmates accused me of ‘ripping off Nike’ and wondering ‘how could u have never seen the Nike logo b4?’

Feel dumb when art = advertising, and I appreciate it too much when it I thought I was just admiring something beautiful.

But I did like the recent Am Appy custom Woody Allen campaign. Feel like it really went viral.

wish websites had ‘billboards.’ Think ‘billboards’ might be the most authentic artistic medium.

Felt sad when I read that famous street graffiti artist Banksy was actually hired by a Coalition of the Eastern world to spread anti-American messages [via internet viral campaign].

Does n e 1 know where I can get an advertising/marketing internship?

[Sneaker shoe Via Craftzine]

Maybe I’ll just be a zany maze guy. It will represent how I am ‘lost’ and ‘trying 2 find my way in the universe.’

Or I guess I can just grow a stache and wear a ‘Beatles wig’ and be a MSTRKRFT (masktercrafts).

Guess I’ll just have to stick with Jeffrey Dahmer dressed as Justice unless yall can think of some1 better.

[via the google images database of funnie pix]

I think it’s fair to say that NIKE will always be the best ‘lifestyle brand’ for both mainstreamers and alts. They have a dual identity. While the probably have well-developed research facilities to develop cutting edge products for the top athletes & the best ‘kids who play a sport and have parents who love them too much’, most of the alternative branding is done with ‘old products that aren’t incredibly comfortable, but people enjoy how they are perceived by others when they wear the product.’ AKA ‘The Convese All Star Theory’.

Sneakers/shoes/footwear are a HUGE representation of ‘who u r’, so I figured I should breakdown what popular shoes mean about U.

Good examples are:

The Samba - I wonder what would happen if people who owned Sambas were required to register for an indoor soccer league. Overall, a ‘humble yet alt’ look that I would compare to a modern take on the Converse All Stars.

Nike Air Force 1s - They are for both black and white people. For people who have advanced beyond having a desire for owning the shoes that belong to a popular athlete.

Generally, Air Force 1s are colourful, and these colors can be used by generic altbros to differentiate from ‘the pack.’ People think they are supposed to be interested in interesting colors on shoes.

Nike Dunks - Are these the same as AirForce1s? I can’t rlly tell.

New Balance 991s - A shoe made for mainstreamers/frat bros/girls who wear athletic shorts+a university t-shirt. These shoes are built for comfort. I wonder if they selected a comfy shoe on purpose, or if it was an arbitrary decision.

Reebok PUMPS - Worn by some one who is probably a VERY dedicated alt or a self-proclaimed ’sneaker freak’ who wants to stand out more than Nikes would allow him to. When it comes to ‘form’, I don’t see why any one would prefer a Reebok design over a Nike design. However, the guy who ‘is wearing pumps’ really wants your attention.

Vans - You might be an entry level ’scenester’ if you wear Vans.

Checkered Vans - You might be a future FGGT/GHEY/future-failed-alt who gets too involved with marijuana and being quirky


The awkward Nike shoe that looks like an indoor soccer shoe/Van – what kind of ass hole would wear this? Probably a failed cool dad.


Adidas Gazelles - If you want an Adidas indoor soccer shoe, you should buy a Samba. Gazelles are kind of like alt-Vans (that’s a bad thing).

Steve Madden Men’s Shoes - It’s probably ‘business casual day’ if u r wearing these shoes.

Keds - You are REALLY being an ass hole if you wear KEDS. You are probably a ‘kid who thinks he/she is smart even though you go to community college and only wear Earth tones/pastels and actually still have Wes Anderson posters up in your room.’


Doc Marten Sandals - Ur probably taking a bath in Abercrombie cologne and shaving your 14 year old pubes in preparation for your ‘first sexual experience’ if you wear these.

Asics - these are for people who are still trying to find themselves/are trying too hard to differentiate.

LA Lights - The type of person who wears these would also like to have a conversation about shows that were on Nickelodeon when you were a kid. ‘Remember Pete&Pete?’


Regular Converse -a classic look that often justifies itself/leaves much to be desired at the same time. It sort of says ‘I am a humble person’ but still lets people know that you are either 10-25% alt or 100% post-alt.

Quirky coloured converse - You were probably in a ska band in high school and are attached to your image as ‘the smart kid who was also artistic and also had a quirky side that his teachers absolutely loved!’

Interesting print Converse - The weekend shoes of mainstreamers.


Converse All Star Xtra High - If u wear these, u do not contribute anything positive to society. Your legs should be removed from the knees-down, and your legs should be used to keep kids in Africa warm.

Awkard Puma soccer/turf shoe - You should have bought some Sambas instead of being a weirdo.


Womens Reebok Freetyle Hi - I have yet to meet a girl who would actually wear this.

Why is Reebok trying to trick French people who like tecktonic into thinking their shoes make them dance better?

Yelle is more important to Reebok than Michael Jordan is to Nike.

Have u seen this Funny YELLE product placement commercial for Reebok?

On the subject of alt-celebrities promoting shoes…
I still can’t believe Converse hired the guy from the Strokes, the black guy from The Pharrell, and Santogold to write a song to promote Converse. This quirky video that forced music blogs to sound excited about an MP3 from multiple artists from different target audiences was one of the biggest hoaxes of the modern bloghouseosphere era.

The song is pretty funny. I feel like sneaker companies forget t
hat ‘normal people’ wear shoes. It’s not just people who ‘think their shoes make them look cool.’ This song is the type of song that ‘people who think that listening to certain new/buzzworthy artists makes them cool’ would listen to on their way to the mall.

I feel like music blogs have a bad reputation because up to this point because of this type of content. A lot of ‘d-bags who think the are supposed to find a collaboration like this interesting’ are the main proponents of mp3 blogs as a news/culture source. So while bloggers feel pressured to ‘blog about this new [HIGHLY BLOGGABLE] content’, the marketers/companies gain promotion but subtract from the authenticity of their message & the authenticity of the targeted blog as a tastemaking source. Advertising to ‘alts who are too cool for anything, but still kind of impressionable’ is difficult, and companies must hire better marketing teams in order to reach the new ALT MARKET, as opposed to advertising to the circa 2002 HIPSTER MARKET.

BUT SRSLY…
IS IT REALLY NECESSARY TO PROMOTE THE CONVERSE ALL STAR? If I were the CEO of Converse, I would stop making every non-AllStar shoe and cancel their initiatives with high-profile athletes like Dwayne Wade.

Converse should just start distributing through thrift stores and be happy with ‘letting people pay what they want’ for their shoes. It worked for Radiohead’s “In Rainbows” and I think this product is similar.

Overall, I think Nike is the powerhouse with all of the history to make the best marketing campaigns. They realize that alts buy their products, but they don’t dedicate that much direct marketing towards them. They let ’sneaker designing boutiques’ and popular athletic figures who every1 liked as a kid to keep the brand’s presence strong with the alts.

This commercial appeals to both mainstreamers and alts with powerful imagery/iconography that we can all associate with. In addition, it utilizes that anthem by the Killers about having soul but not being a soldier (this song theoretically appeals to every1/sounds like the kind of song that mainstreamers-who-are-unaware-of-new-bands will go out and buy, then have conversations about ‘hearing this awesome song in a Nike commecial and the CD is actually really amazing.’)

[HIGHLY RECCD ENDING WITH A SPRINTER WITH NO LEGS]

I don’t think Nike’s alternative advertising is very heavy-handed. They keep their mainstream markets as a top priority as opposed to trying to ‘take over the alts.’ For example, this Nike Soccer commercial was directed by Guy Richie, who is theoretically an indie director (who banged Madonna), so every one can feel comfortable liking it.

N e ways…What kind of shoes do you wear?
Which lifestyle brand do u trust?
Which business is the best?
What shoes will be big in 2k9?
Do u feel like u r way 2 valued as a ‘hipster’ consumer by d-bags who have brainstorming sessions where they try to identify ‘what makes a hipster’?
What is a ‘hipster’?
What is an ‘alt’?
What is a ’scenester’?
Should I buy shoes only based on comfort?
Should I buy shoes that are made by lil AZN kids/women who are being underpaid?
Does being a ‘responsible consumer’ make the world a better place?
Remember hippie kids who ‘didn’t wear shoes’?

Since most men can’t wear clothes like these/they don’t sell clothes like these in the Old Navy Men’s section, alternative society has turned to the glorification of ‘wearing jeans, a t-shirt, and tennis shoes.’

Also, we are in an era where men receive a gold star for wearing an accessory that lets people know that they are trying to differentiate from the standard bro. Whether it is a pair of sunglasses, an alternative Livestrong bracelet, or some clunky hat, men can achieve fashion recognition by wearing something that is only 10% differentiated from a mainstream un-cool Dad on vacation.

For example, being a male who is recognized for ‘having good fashion sense’ is only about 5-10% differentiated from this old man. All he would need is a MembsOnly Jacket swap, some bigger print/a more obnoxious graphic on his t-shirt, jeans that cost $20 more, and a Yankees cap with the logo upside down or some gimmick like that.

Anyways, all of this is inspired because I saw this TERRIBLE video that glorifies these generic ‘urban wear’ bros. The thing I don’t understand about all of this urban wear is that they really take the whole ‘LIFESTYLE BRAND’ too seriously. Theoretically, life style brands are good for culture. Realistically, they are just a way for marginally creative people to change the colours of products that already exist and sell them to a niche market.

When I watch this video, I just imagine all of these bros saying in their urban-y dialect ‘fashion is like, art, that people wear around to places.’
[HIGHLY RECCD VIDEO]
[SRSLY THIS VIDEO MADE ME WANT TO LIVE NAKED IN THE WOODS WITH MGMT, Nell, and Henry David Thoreau 4 THE REST OF MY LIFE]

Which 1 of these featured men is ur fave?

1. Bailey Roberts (the deep fashionista wearing blind people glasses) did yall hear about ‘the colorful shit dying down’/that people need to start having beach parties to save fashion?
2. Maestro – he makes videos. I hope that provides him with enuff $$$ to buy colourful shoes.
3. Aaron Williams – he is wearing old lady Golden Girl Glasses
4. Joey Calderon – Mexi or AZN?
5. BJ the Chicago Kid – he thinks ur ’swag’ is really important.
6. Kyle Awtry – I feel like this white guy is what Panda Bear would be if he listened to too much rap/rap-rock during his formative years and didn’t attend a school for the Arts.
7. Geoff Nishimoto – There is always an AZN who gets mixed up in perceived-as-alt-&-authentic black hiphop culture. O well. he listens 2 Crystal Castles and makes AZN Honda Civic gang signals.
8. Dom Kennedy – He is dressed like a ‘janitor who is trying to be cool and is a little bit ashamed to mop elementary school floors even though he drives a Mercedes. Also, he talks to his girlfriend who is also at a low-paying night job on his blue tooth for the duration of the night on the job.’
9. Cecil Bernardy – forgettable lil Andre 3000 bro.
10. Jay – He looks like a guy who walks into a Chili’s with a Blue Tooth headset and a mistress, and treats her like she is

“Flashing Lights” by Kanye West: A “deep” song for black people/people who are trying to be black people?

[VIDEO FROM GVB Tumblr]

I am a huge fan of letting your consumer decisions represent your inner-soul/personal brand or whatever, but I just find it hard to take some of these bros who are involved in the ‘urban wear’ scene seriously. While we are all looking for our ideal profession or even just some sort of reason that we are alive/what we can contribute to humanity, all of these bros must look themselves in the mirror and understand that no one was put on this earth to doodle on t-shirts or change the color of Nikes.

Also…Is it fair to assume that women have an easier time simulating their adoption of ‘high-end’ fashion trends? Do they have more opportunities to accessories, or are there better stores for women where they can buy stuff that’s ‘in’?

Bros will be bros. Bros will always wear jeans, tennis shoes, and shirts with or without collars. Not rlly a big deal, yall.

Needless to say, this halter top TURNS ME 0N.

Should I blog more about Native Americans & Pacific Islanders? Am I giving the AZNs, gheys & alt bros 2 much attention?

Were all alts created equally under 1 alt G0D?

[Photo by Playlust]

HIGH SNOBIETY says:

In this picture you see the “Pedro Winter” shoe, which is the right shoe. The left shoe is designed by So_Me and in fact the shoes are having a conversation, when looking at the graphics. Another highlight is the rainbow sole.

I feel like SoMe, the graphicologist for Ed Banger Records, probably just did both shoes. They both probably recognize the opportunity for a sustainable alternative symbiotic relationship.

Do you think some one will wear the Justice jackets with their Busy P dunks?
Should they have just written the lyrics to “D.A.N.C.E.” on these shoes?
Is this Ed Banger’s greatest creation since Uffie?
Does any one know if Daft Punk is still affiliated with Busy P?

xx BONUS BUSY P topless pic xx

[Image by Last Night's Partie]

We live in a world of tiny men in bulky basketball shoes.

Do u like Arts & Crafts? (the activity, not the record label)
I think it’s good to express yourself, but I don’t think you should make your own shoes without the proper orthopedic support. You should definitely spend $80 or more on shoes to make sure you get ample comfort and support.

Just because you made your own shoes doesn’t mean they are more relevant or meaningful than a pair of dunks a little AZN kid could have made 4 u.

Every consumer good was made 4 a reason: 2 Make Ur Life Better.

Do u wear comfy shoes?
Or do u just like kute shoes?
Are Nikes that comfortable?
If you wore Chuck Taylors for a year of your life, should you expect to have re-constructive ankle surgery by the time you are 60?

RACISM IS DEAD, YALL. If a sea of Mexican children can hold up an AZN man, then there are clearly no problems–there’s no such thing as skin colour. Every one needs to chill out and listen 2 more remixes, and just have fun, and wear Air Force Ones.

The Global Economy will end racism.
-the topic sentence of HIPSTER RUNOFF’s thesis before he had to drop out of NYU to partie, 2005

[the Cobradank]

xx NEW HIPSTER RUNOFF GIMMICK xx
…in search of… WHAT DOES CORY KENNEDY EVEN DO?

Cory Kennedy: She stands in front of stuff and looks BLOWN/like she wants to give you a tugjob.

If you were founder of Nike, Phil Knight, would you do everything in your power to keep this picture from weakening your global brand?

Find out more about Cory Kennedy at her Myspace 3.0 page
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cory_Kennedy