HIPSTER RUNOFF

[Photo by thecobrasnake]
This is a beautiful photograph. U can't really see what's happening, but that is kind of a metaphor. We need more metaphors which will help us to reflect in 2k9.

I can't be 100% certain what is happening in the picture. Is it a house party? Is it a meaningful electro concert? Is it a picture from the Running of the Bulls? Is it a group of bros being executed as a group? Is it a group of people singing the song "Losing My Religion" by R.E.M.? Is it a group of bros trying to go viral via their youtube channel? We'll never know, yall.

"I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try" -The R.E.M.s

But part of me kinda likes not knowing. While I usually yearn for certainty, this time I feel at peace without knowing an answer to all of my questions. I know I'm not the only one.

There's more to photography than yall think.
Beautiful Photographs Make U Think About Life.

(Maybe it was just an artistic decision 2 try to hide the Shuttershades bro)

miss u 2k_
As we move forward in time, are we realizing that 2k_ was the best year in the history of the world?

I used to be a party photographer
with my own website on the internet
filled with pictures of culture
and youth and fun and love and relevant bands

But then 2k8 ended
and I had 2 grow up
My hair went grey/fell out
and the youth which I documented
grew up and/or died

It was time to make a choice
did I want 2 work at Arby's/Chili's?
or did I want 2 put my dSLR skills to work?
After Obama I watched Obama launch his new website/get inaugurated
the choice was an obvious one

I decided to spend my life documenting
more important things
like politics
& nature
& 'historical events'
& relevant celebrities (not paparazzi stuff, tho)

I want to be
more than just a bro
taking pix of me/people who look like me
with my hi-end camera

I will spend the rest of my life
taking meaningful photos
that are more than just 'blogworthy'
I want them to go in the textbooks
that are issued to my children
and my children's children.

I will invest money
in technology and travel
to be at the most relevant events
freelancing
and finding my photos in relevant periodicals (not on the web/a flickr account)

Yesterday, I took this picture.

This picture may or may not be a metaphor.

I also took this picture

This picture may or may not be a metaphor.

I also took this picture.

This picture may or may not be a metaphor.

I also took this picture.

This picture may or may not be a metaphor.

I have grown up.
Grown as a photographer
beyond taking pictures in dimly lit clubs
of an alternative population
who show off their tattos & tits

I started 2 capture LIFE
through my lens
because there's more 2 life
than electroBloghaus parties
and meaningful band photography.

I am photography.
I am in touch with humanity.
I am documenting humanity.
I am PhotoBro 3.0.

[Photo by The Cobrasnake]
When I grow up into the alt that I will one day be, I want to have a cut of hair in the shape of a spacious mixing bowl, with a well-defined plane of man bangs. (Sorry yall--still just trying 2 trendhunt a lot in 2k9. Not sure if I'm going to convert my progressive 1999 Caesar cut into a bowl cut just yet).

This bro is me.
This browl cut is me.
The bowl on my head is my hair.
These are my man bangs--they are functional
/// keeping the bowl out of my eyes.
/// and my metaphorical 'head' held 'high.'

XX BONUS PHOTOGRAPHER BRO XX

I am a photographer bro
in a sea of alts
Searching for
meaningful images
to capture 4evr

While I don't believe in G-d
or an afterlife
I kind of believe in souls
because I capture something when I take pictures

Learned how to hack the web
and build a site
that is web 1.0
making it more authentic than web 2.0 bullshit

These are my dreams
to one day become a relevant photographer
for magazines
and blogs
and nightlife
and life
and pix of my bffs
with a valuable site
that people fly me to 'cover'

In 10 years, you will look back on my website
and it will be kind of like a relevant cultural museum
kinda like
the graveyard that is myspace

A lot of different elements need to come together to get a perfect party pic. You need more than just a hot slut, a sexie pose, a high priced lens+flash, and a formidable background.

Here's a great 'behind the scenes' shot by Nicky Digital:

You have to search for the right angles. Sometimes you have to cut slits in the knees of your jeans. You have to be an art director, which means telling people that they can't have Bud Light long necks in the picture.

Sometimes you just have to pray that you'll run into a girl with a wardrobe valued over $40, provided by Forever 21 and Claire's.

I wonder when Party Photographers are going to unionize. Probably by 2010.

What makes u admire party photographers?
When will art schools start offering a minor in Nightlife Photography Studies?

[Pics by Nicholas Digital]