What would u do if ur bro started 2 chill around town bare naked, except for a kute lil shuttershades necklace?
a) have an ‘intervention’ with him about his personal branding choices
b) take him on an am Appy shopping spree
c) take him to JC Penny’s so he can buy a chill bro blazer
d) encourage him to ‘become a mainstreamer’ so he can wear cargo shorts, Hollister shirts, Old Navy flag tees, etc.
e) distance yourself from ‘bro status’ with him
f) ‘roll with him’ so that u can get attention by ‘knowing him.’
g) craft a pair of shuttershades for ur peen head
h) tell him about a kewl new band called ‘the jousteeces.’
i) travel with him to the woods, listen to the Grizzly Animal Bear Collective, and spend a nite talking about existentialism/societal norms
j) Try to make a viral vid with him while he walks down a busy street naked in Paris, France.
k) become ‘bi’/'homosexual’
l) try to compare ‘cock sizes’
m) start a blog with pix of him and hope u ‘go viral’/'get a book deal’
n) get a job at McDonalds to get u more ‘in touch’ with ‘real ppl’
o) ‘murder’ him
p) Go up behind him, and yell ‘YALL GOT RUNOFF’D, mother effers!’
q) Choose.Your.Own.Response

Feel embarrassed about my current situation. Like my bro is ‘losing his f*cking mind.’ Think it might be part of ‘growing older’ or something, and wanting 2 stay young forever [via Peter Pan {subVia Michael Jacksons}]. Think he is trying to be innovative or something. Feel bad if his lil necklaces represent a minimemorial 4 a ‘fallen altbro’ or something.

Sorta miss the days when shuttershades were still ‘relevant’ and ‘only kewl people’ were wearing them. h8 tween proliferation.

http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/tag/shutter-shades

I can’t be 100% certain what is happening in the picture. Is it a house party? Is it a meaningful electro concert? Is it a picture from the Running of the Bulls? Is it a group of bros being executed as a group? Is it a group of people singing the song “Losing My Religion” by R.E.M.? Is it a group of bros trying to go viral via their youtube channel? We’ll never know, yall.

“I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try” -The R.E.M.s

But part of me kinda likes not knowing. While I usually yearn for certainty, this time I feel at peace without knowing an answer to all of my questions. I know I’m not the only one.

There’s more to photography than yall think.
Beautiful Photographs Make U Think About Life.

(Maybe it was just an artistic decision 2 try to hide the Shuttershades bro)

miss u 2k_
As we move forward in time, are we realizing that 2k_ was the best year in the history of the world?

[Photo by the Preggers Goldfish]

Yall. Because of Universal Warming, the sun is getting brighter/hotter. Eventually, the sun will be able to burn through our corneas and possibly our retinas. This means that we are going to have to wear more Protective Technologies, like Shutter Shades, blind people glasses, and flickr blockrs. In an effort to reduce time spent out during daylight hours, men and women will be forced to dress in black & wear humble loafers. We will carry fannypacks that aren’t strapped around our fannies full of nourishment & emergency medical supplies.

Are yall scared of the future?

Here is a diagram of the human eye for readers who obtained education which focused in the Arts & Humanities (instead of Math & Science).

Guys, we have to make sure that we don’t lose our vision. If we can’t look at computer screens/the way other people look, then how are we going to construct ourselves? Would h8 to have to listen to the radio to consume all of my information. And we wouldn’t have the opportunity to ‘get’ funnie viral videos/sillie internet pix of cats that want veggieburgers.

Should I buy these functional shuttershades to protect my eyesight?

[Photo by Domestic Fine Arts]

Or should I become a welding masked DJ?

How Innovative r u when it comes to products & trends?

On this graph:

• AZNs/Japanazns/It Girls/designers/alt-celebs = innovators.
• AltBros who read too many blogs = Early Adopters
• AltBags/AltBros = Early Majority
• Mainstreamers + Maltstreamers + entrylevel alts= Late Majority
• Cool Dads + PostMainstreamers wearing costumes = Laggards

[Please help me revise the theory behind this graph!]

I remember one of the most astounding technological innovations in the history of the Alternative Economy was the creation of a pair of glasses without traditional lenses that still offered u the opportunity to block the sun from irritating ur retina. The Shutter Shades were one of the most amazing products some1 has ever designed, kinda like an iPhone or a Pringles can. It’s just good to know that glasses makers are still pushing forward, trying to find something new.

It’s good to know that Innovators are still willing to take risks, and keep introducing trends into the alternative trendosphere.

Does n e 1 else miss the golden age of Shutter Shades?

N e ways…since I am basically Teenager HQ on the internet, here is a song that was left off REALITY CHECK but included on some single in a foreign country.

They are working on new stuff. Wouldn’t u be tired of playing ‘Homecoming’ to entry-level alts who just heard it last week, too? Does n e 1 else miss remixes by the Teenagers? Bloghouse was so innocent back then. :-(

[MP3]
The Teenagers Trouble

Myspace
http://www.myspace.com/theteenagers

XX BONUS SHUTTER SHADES PIC XX


XX BONUS ALICE GLASS SIGHTING XX

Is that a Mr. Potato Head Tattoo on her wrist?
[http://flickr.com/photos/theteenagers]

Does n e 1 know if AZN glasses are going to be big in 2k10?

The Olympics in China have been really successful, so I think a lot of people are going to ‘try to be AZN’ or something like that. U know how the world is… when they see something that they think is ‘alt’, they try to align their personal brand with it. s00 annoying/inauthentic.

Does n e 1 know if white framed sunglasses are still ‘underground’/'indie’/'unique-core’?

Should I just buy some zany coloured Wayfarers and match them to my clothing?

Or should I buy sunglasses that enable me to take the lenses out for days when it isn’t sunny?

YALL.
I’M SO CONFUSED. I HATE THE TAIL-END OF TRENDS. IT’S LIKE I DON’T KNOW WHO I AM N E M0RE. SUXXX SO BAD.

N e ways…Summer is almost over… do u need to wear sunglasses in the non-summer? Or are they a summer-exclusive accessory?
r u gonna miss the Shuttershade era?
R.I.P. Kanye West. U had a good run.

[photos by Every1isFamesies]

Mainstreamers+festivalBros got rlly mad at alts for ‘taking over the scene’ and attracting ‘a bunch of artists that no1 has even heard of.’

I’m just glad the alts handled themselves with grace and post-post-ironically giggled it off. They also came prepared with headbands and bandanas to wipe up any excess blood.

Kid Sister, also known as Hillary Banks 2.0, looks to have played at the festival. I’m glad she got all dolled up 4 it, instead of treating it like ‘a bunch of nobodies from Milwaukee.’

It seems like festival security was kind of lacking. Some old lady wandered up on to stage after taking too many of her meds. She was in a pair of golden granny panties.

Remember ‘band photography’? R.I.P. He should trade in that lens, and invest in a Canon Party Pic 3000 lens.

I wish I could be young again and know what it means to appreciate modern culture for all of the right reasons. (I wish my parents had the money to encourage me to appreciate the arts when I was a kid. Do u think they got dropped off, or was a parent stuck there in the Dance tent watching bloghouse DJS?)

Lollapalooza set attendance records because there happened to be a MAINSTREAMALTBRO Convention going on in the ballroom of a nearby Holiday Inn.

Do u wish u had gone?
did u go? Who did u see? did any thing ‘zany’ or ‘meaningful’ happen?
Or was it just ’same ol shit’?
2ManyAlts? Not enough authenticity at music festivals n e m0re?
Who r u? U’ve changed a lot in the last 5 years.
What’s the best Musie Festival?

More Lollapalooza coverage at
http://www.everyoneisfamous.com

XX BONUS ALT CELEB WITH A SHITTY BEER PIC XX

Beers with lime in them were made for Latino Markets & Popular Mashup DJs.
[Alt Polaroid by Gorillavsbear]

Remember the time I blggd abt Coachella?
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/04/coachella-quizzin.html

<3 covering music festivals for yall <3

‘Glasses with no lenses’ may now also be referred to as ‘Shutter-shades with no shutters.’

[Photo by Every1IsClaytonHauck]

KUTE AZN GIRLS: the world’s #1 source for emerging trends?

[Photo by ReadySetGlo]