I saw this picture portraying a homeless man sleeping on the sidewalk. Unfortunately, he had a pee pee accident as his dark yellow urine streamed down towards the star of a celebrity. I felt tons of emotions as my brain processed this digital image. Shame. Guilt. LOLability. Snarkfactor. Sadness. AmericanBeauty. Happiness. Loneliness. Fucksocietivity. Bloggy. Alive. Dead on the inside. Alone. Without a home. Metaphorical. This is the power of photography. A simple man who peed his pants in his sleep [via no home] can say so much about humanity, society, and the struggle 2 create a better life for urself.

The sad/beautiful image of the homeless man made me think of a recent post on the globally acclaimed streetfashion blog ‘the Sartorialist’ in which the photoblogger posted a picture of a coloured homeless man, then wrote an ‘inspiring blurb’.

Photo and blurb by the Sartorialist:

I don’t usually shoot homeless people. I don’t find it romantic or appealing like a lot of street photographers, and if you asked homeless people they are probably not to happy about their situation either. That’s why I was surprised to be so drawn to taking a picture of this gentleman.

I was being interviewed for an article in British Vogue; and while we walked down Bowery back in April I barely stopped walking when I took the shot. Fiona Golfar, the writer, asked why I took the photo. At that moment I couldn’t really explain – but I just had a feeling about the power and grace of how he was sitting there. It wasn’t until later that night when I was working on the image that I realized why I had noticed this man.

Usually people in this man’s position have given up hope. Maybe this gentleman has too, I don’t know, but he hasn’t given up his sense of self or his sense of expressing something about himself to the world. In my quick shot I had noticed his pale blue boots, what I hadn’t noticed at first were the matching blue socks, blue trimmed gloves, and blue framed glasses. This shot isn’t about fashion – but about someone who, while down on his luck, hasn’t lost his need to communicate and express himself through style.

Looking at him dressed like this makes me feel that in some way he hasn’t given in or given up.

Damn. The bloggerbro’s inspirational blurb is actually kinda true… It’s like even though you might be the poorest, most worthless, homeless guy in the world, it doesn’t mean that u can’t have a little bit of pride 2 make sure that your clothes match. Never give up. Every day, u have the opportunity to brand yourself–you have the opportunity to let the world know that you are a person, and within this person is a brand which the whole world can consume.

Homelessness is not a disease–homelessness is the product of a group of people who have no pride. A group of people who don’t play by society’s rules. A group of people living in some demented reality, no longer in touch with the availability of legitimate intrinsic rewards through the power of ‘creating.your.own.image.’ We must inspire the homeless so that they can inspire us to do more than to take artsy pix of them. It is easy for photographers to take pictures of homeless people because they usually look ‘insane’, ‘urban’, and as if society has shat upon them.

A lot of people say that homeless people should ‘get a fucking job’–now I firmly believe that they would get a job if they dressed nicely, and treated people with respect. It seems like they could some how get a job at an investment bank, or perhaps a McDonalds, similar to the plotline of the popular Will Smith joint ‘The Pursuit of Happyness.’

After reading that inspired blurb, it sort of makes me want to tell this guy to ‘get his shit together’, and ‘have a little bit of pride.’ U can’t go around pissing on urself and wearing lame ass clothes if you really want to turn ur life around.

It doesn’t matter if you can’t control your bladder, or if you are mentally challenged, or if you are having ‘terrible flashback dreams.’ Every day, you need to take pride in yourself. You need to realize that your personal brand is being interpreted by every1 who sees you. Do you want to depress your viewers? Or do you want to inspire them? Be a valuable person–not just to yourself, but also to society as a whole.

This is a blog post about hope.

Hey yall. Had a super busy weekend. I have been awake for the past 72 hours, doing tons of addy (adderal), a lil bit of blow, 5-hour energies, Diet Red Bulls, and even tapped into my ‘emergency reserves’ of Sparks. My first design school project is due tomorrow, and the critique is gonna be super hard. My professor was a guest judge on Project Runway, so I really need to impress him if I want to get an internship with some1 relevant.

The assignment was ‘make a piece of clothing that represents u.’ I chose to make a sweet jacket. I’m new to sewing, so I needed something that would rlly ’stand out’ without exposing my technical flaws. I think the rugged aesthetic of my jacket really works. It looks formal, but also ‘chill’ since there is some denim. There’s also a patch of my fave game, Super Mario World, on it. Really feel like this jacket is me.

I am afraid of my critique, yall. Afraid of ‘having to justify’ why my work of art exists. Not sure if I will ‘get fucking grilled’ for some of my design decisions. Worried that there will be some hi level art fggts who make better stuff than me. Worried about ‘not being the best’ in my class. Don’t want 2 b made fun of. This jacket is ‘actually me.’ Just hope people accept me 4 who I am.

I was looking for summer looks, and I noticed this bro wearing huge athletic shoulder pads. I think that they are supposed to be ‘protective.’ Might be inspired by ‘all of the drama in Iran.’ Like the whole world is about to turn into ‘a massive battlefield’, and we all have to be prepared for ‘riot police’/'nuclear weapons being dropped.’

I kinda feel relieved that Obama is in office now. If George W. Bush was in office, he would probably make us ‘nuke’ Iran, and we would probably have to go to war with them. Would be hella worried about ‘getting drafted.’ Not sure if I want to be drafted into a war. No sure how that would go. Wonder if the military camps would have wifi. Wonder if I could take my Macbook, or if I could only use compys in compy labs. Wonder if I could still download relevant mp3s from mp3 blogs.

I don’t wanna be drafted, yall. :-(

N e ways… Think that football pads seem pretty ‘alt’ in our modern world, but might become ‘mainstream’ soon. Might buy some ‘leopard print’ leggings to set myself apart. Just looking for a summer look.

Sorta reminds me of the most alternative bro of all time, John Alt.

http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/08/the-worlds-most-alternative-athletes.html

Do yall have any good ideas 4 summer loox?

I sorta miss the old days, back when it was kewl 2 wear ur BF’s clothes the day after you slept over at his place. Used to just usually be an ‘oversized oxford shirt’, but think the trend is expanding. Think it is a sign that ur ’seriously committed to some1′–like a cobranding opportunity. This broad is proud 2 show off that she ’spent the night’ with ‘a very handsome man’ who chills in blazers and Oxford shirts. She even added some height by wearing some sort of platform shoes/shoes with rollerskates in them.

I feel like the ’swinger mentality’ might be ‘going out of style.’ Think that it is important to be in a relationship, and find ‘the 1.’ As fun as it might be to ‘put ur peen in a lot of holes’/'have ur holes filled by a lot of peens and fingers’, there comes a time when u just need to grow up and get into a long term relationship. Some1 who will be there 4 u. Some1 who u can grow old with. Some1 who u can ‘not get tired of’ and ‘won’t resent them as u see them growing older and fatter.’

Might build a time machine and spend my youth ‘becoming a twink’ so I can get a ‘bear’ boyfriend and sleepover at his place, get ‘rammed up my poop shoot’ and wear his big clothes. Feel like that life might be a good one. Just wanna be with some1 who loves me/lets me wear his work clothes+buys me nice things.

Previous sleeping over at BF’s and wearing his shirt coverage
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/tag/wearing-my-boyfriends-shirt

OR CLICK ON A GIRL FOR A VINTAGE HRO MEME

Wish I coulda slept with all of them.

Have yall ever worn ur significant other’s clothing?

I am not your standard bro.
I see the world with a different pair of glasses, which are not ‘rose coloured.’
I mix elements of Christianity and the Matrix in2 my personal brand.
I do not believe in concepts like ‘time’, ’space’, and ‘love.’
I do not find pleasure in any sensory activities.
I try to have ‘no aesthetic’ but unfortunately people try to call me ‘fashion forward.’
I walk down the street and people stare at me. They wonder ‘what is up with that bro.’ They would never be able to understand what is up with me.

“I” do not “exist.” I am just sort of here to ‘challenge’ people and their ‘realities.’ I make you uncomfortable because I do not exist for the same reason you exist. I am a conceptual bro. I want to make u ‘think’ about ‘the big picture.’ Want to make u ask ‘why?‘

I want to be noticed. I do not want to be noticed.

This is me.
These are my rings (collected while my family vacationed in Arizona and New Mexico).
This is my cross. This is my faith.
This is me underneath my dark hood.

I am sort of like a ‘fameball celeb’ who makes u wonder WHY/HOW ppl get famous.
I am a think piece.
I am more than just a human who is ‘alive.’
I exist for a reason that extends beyond ‘general humanity.’

I have always wondered what instrument will help me seem the most authentic. I feel like too many people play guitar, and tons of people can play ableton/turntables, so I’m just searching for something that will make me stand out a little bit more. Would like to start some sort of authentic folk band and get ’significant coverage in p4k magazine.’ Might buy a banjo. Feel like people who can play the banjo are always respected as pure musicians. Feel like people always ‘respect’ folk music no matter what.

Might buy a saxophone instead. Possibly start a ‘pazz and jop’ band like the TelevisionsOnTheRadios.

Might write an album about every state in the United States, and get it done before Sufjan does.

Do yall know what the most authentic instrument to be able to play is?
Or is it better to ‘be a production genius’ who is decent at every instrument?
Did ur parents get u musical lessons when u were a kid? Do u wish u took them more srsly so u could be in a relevant band 2day?

Think that I am going to cast two bros as the lead bros.

Photos via histiley

Bro #2 also seems chill.

Think that there are a lot of different directions 2 go in.

Might decide to cast a woman and have the bros be entrepreneurs.

Might make the sitcom about teen issues.

Might make the sitcom more of a ‘teledrama’ about dead bros in the alt scene and crimes and shit like that.

Might make the bros mutilate themselves’ and film it. Will make them do shit like ‘cut their peens in half’ and other stuff that the Bam Margera/Johnathan Knoxville/Verne ‘Wee Man’ Troyer did.

Might import a funnie show from Britain and do my best to Americanize it so that it is ‘critically acclaimed’ even though it is empty.

Thinking about writing some sort of tween mystery show to get an authentic following of tweens who are both smart and lonely/not allowed 2 have BFs/GFs [via the Twilight audience]

Might make it a snarkie social commentary cartoon for adults only.

Might have an ensemble cast of alt people living life in a meaningful city.

Might name one of the bros in my sitcom ’seinbro’ and have him get

Feel like maybe a reality show would work. might include ‘fighting and death.’ I have read articles that cagefighting is the new sport that people are into since 79% people only watch sports to watch ppl ‘get severely injured.’

Do yall have any ideas for a good sitcom about alternative people in our modern world? Sometimes I feel like I can’t come up with ideas that are original. Just feel so influenced by images from my youth. Wonder if I will ever create something that is totally my own, and not influenced by anything else.

Feel free to pitch some ideas in the comments section of this post, and I will relay your ideas to people I know within the industry. What types of characters + themes + plot + setting are necessary for the modern show that realistically portrays alternative ppl? Or is this show already on television [via GossipGirl/Skins/TheApprentice]?

Sometimes I wonder what we will be like when we’re old, yall. Like will we still be the same size, and still look the same? Will we have grey/gray/white hair/go bald? Will we be like ’suddenly everything has changed’ [via the Postal Servicing]? I feel inspired to ’stay young 4evr’ by this beautiful old woman wearing an altbro colour palette.

I hope that when I’m old, I’m still able to stay ‘fresh.’ I just want to be kewler than my kids and grand kids, and I don’t really want to let them experiment with trends that are doomed 2 fail. I just want them to be a lot like me, and if they ever stray from the path of authenticity, I will lash out at them, like I am deeply disappointed in 1 of their life decisions. Not sure if I even want them to be successful, but I think I just want to know that they aren’t ‘wasting their glory days.’ Miss being seventween, yall.

1 day I will be on my deathbed (wearing Am Appy)
and I will look back on my life
and I will say ‘i was a chill ass bro
who just wanted to have a good time
and there’s nothing wrong with that’

Scared about getting old, yall. Don’t want to lose ‘the most important’ parts of ‘me.’
What do yall wanna be like when u grow up and are about 2 die?

I feel like PattyWolfAlts might be invading local scenes. Seems like it must be a pretty intense lifechoice. Personally, I would probs rather just wear Am Appy.

Photo by the streetwalker

Not sure if PattyWolf Alts are twinks or post-sexuals. Feel like they just want to ’stand out’ and possibly ‘be fierce.’

Not even sure it Patty Wolf is a ‘relevant artist.’ Does n e 1 know some 1 who buys his records? Can some1 tell me what he sounds like?

Feel like the Brandon FlowersAlt/KillerAlt might be more relevant.

miss u

I’ve got soul but I’m not a soldier, yall.

Yall. Just saw this blipster wearing a necklace with a Game Boy on it. I wasn’t born when these gadgets were around, but I know that they were a pretty big deal. Kinda weird when people apply the whole ‘vintage’ mindset 2 technology. U assume that things ‘continue 2 get better’, but some people prefer aesthetics from the past. Kinda weird.

What portable gaming device would u use as a necklace?
a) PSP
b) Nintendo DS
c) Gameboy
d) Gameboy colour
e) Game Gear
f) blue Game Gear
g) Portable DVD player
h) Tamagachis
i) an iPhone with no music or service, but just games
j) a Super Nintendo tied around ur neck
k) a Wii controller
l) the band ‘the Ataris’
m) Choose.Your.Own.Response

Hope that the increased demand for these old machines doesn’t make the price go up. Need 2 get a good deal on ebay.

Previous HRO video game analysis
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2009/03/i-am-thinking-about-buying-a-new-video-game-because-it-looks-cool.html