HIPSTER RUNOFF

[meme hijack via tumblrdore]

This is a list of countries that I would want to live/study abroad in. U can learn a lot about 'the world' based on how many computers every1 has.

More computers = more wifi
More computers = more bros on social networks
More computers = less poors (at least for now while good computers are >$999)
More computers = more 'culture'
More computers = more 'educated people' to have relevant conversations with
More computers = more coffee shops
More computers = more people who go out in public with the hope of 'being street fashion blggd abt'
More computers = more people 'being productive' with their time
More computers = more tolerance
More computers = more people who voted for Obama at change.gov
More computers = less people watching the local news.
More computers = less 'h8 crimes'
More computers = less 'brown-ish ppl'?
More computers = more jobs for the coffee shop economy
More computers = more digi cams 2 'capture life'
More computers = a thriving economy
More computers = a thriving meme economy

Are these assumptions true? Can yall think of n e more? (Just using logic. srry if u don't 'get' why I think that, but I am positive that all of these are true.)

Before I move to a new country, I will make sure that I am aware of the computer-to-ppl ratio, and the wifi network-per-100ppl ratio. It's important 2 do research b4 u go somewhere. Even if you are just booking a hotel. Make sure you call the hotel to ask if their internet solution is stable enough to meet your day-to-day needs.

Kinda weird how Israel is #1 on that chart. Kinda makes u think 2k9 might be the year of the JewAlt/AltJew. Just don't want 2 live in any country with less than 100 computers per 100 ppl. Am I being unreasonable? (h8 u Japan, USA, 3rd World, Brown countries, the Land of the Poors, etc)

Should I plan a pilgrimage to 'chill at the home of Jesus', and smoke a bowl/do a line with him [off my iPhone nano] while we chill on our Macbooks and have the TV on in the background?

Needless 2 say, I am NOT looking forward 2 the Third World getting computers for free on the cheap. I always see commercials about how I need 2 give my hard earned paycheck [via wasting time on the internet at work] to African kids to give them a handful of rice/mush/ cream-of-wheat/gritz/porridge/go-gurt/ecto-coolers so that they can stay nourished. Now yall r telling me that they need social networks + Microsoft Word + Solitaire?

I had to 'grow' into my laptop, spending most of my childhood on a desktop (without portability)...kinda wish they had 2 go through the same 'trials and tribulations' that defined my childhood.

This is a post about computers/technology/the internet/U.
This is a poem about technology/consumerism written by the pop rock band The Daft Punks

Buy it, use it, break it, fix it,
trash it, change it, melt - upgrade it,
charge it, pawn it, zoom it, press it,
snap it, work it, quick - erase it,
write it, get it, paste it, save it,
load it, check it, quick - rewrite it,
plug it, play it, burn it, rip it,
drag and drop it, zip - unzip it,
lock it, fill it, curl it, find it,
view it, curl it, jam - unlock it,
surf it, scroll it, pose it, click it,
cross it, crack it, twitch - update it,
name it, read it, tune it, print it,
scan it, send it, fax - rename it,
touch it, bring it, obey it, watch it,
turn it, leave it, stop - format it.

Take some time 2 think about what exactly that means b4 yall go2 bed 2nite. There's more 2 it than 'just being a dancey song.' This is a post about trying to get yall to 'reach a higher thinking level' and be able to pick up on stuff like this without going 2 a blog every day that teaches u how 2 look at the world. Sometimes I feel like a progressive History/English Teacher who is challenging my students' perception of reality by using 'deep' Literature and discussing a lot of societal injustices+transgressions. One day, I will release yall like a 'mother bird' knocking it's babies out of the next so that they learn 2 fly [via the foo fighters song].

n e ways... kinda just wrote this post bc I have a 'technical question' and maybe some1 will know.

Does n e 1 know the universal password 2 crack locked wireless networks?
a) god
b) sex
c) pussy
d) dragon
e) pussydragon69
f) fggt
g) 123456
h) Obama
i) SteveJobs69
j) BillGatesBro
k) DialUpInternet3rdWorldBros
l) MacbookHax0r
m) theMovieHackers
n) JenAnistonBrangelina
o) brosb4skanks
p) cumonmyface69
q) BrokencydeFreaxxx
r) blog
s) linksys
t) googlebros
u) siliconvalleyyall
v) SetMemeOn
w) cd/passwordbro
x) Select * from passwords where password_user like "stephen_aoki" or "crystal_castles" or "the_Justices" or "HRO_2k8_go2_gimmicks"
y) carlesrunoff2k24suicide
z) Choose.Your.Own.Response

For future reference:

[Photo by The Street Walker]

Hi mom,
Haven't really tried to communicate with you since mother's day. I appreciate the fact that you have kept money flowing into my account. I'm working on getting a job, I promise. Things are just busy at design school. You'll be happy to know that I have a set of very demanding professors who are getting the best of me. Needless to say, I have big dreams.

I know that sometimes you don't 'get' my lifestyle. That's okay. One day you will. The truth is that I am an artist. I need to tell the world who I am and what is on my mind. Whether it's the way I dress, the content in my facebook profile, or the doodles that I make on coffee shop napkins, all of these small things represent me. (Even though they are small, I have learned to consider them meaningful.)

I've had a lot of false starts on my journey towards adulthood, but please know that I have really matured. I voted for the first time in this election, and I felt like I was part of something bigger than myself. I know you weren't an Obama supporter, but hopefully I can change your mind at Thanksgiving dinner. Maybe we can also talk about how I don't believe in God any more, if time permits.

You see? I have my own mind now. Free of being impressionable. I am unique these days, mom. You'd be proud of me. The other night, my friends and I stayed up til 6 a.m. drinking box wine and talking about life/philosophy/design/consumerism. I just think things are really headed in the right direction for me. I might have to study abroad soon to make sure I am immersed in a meaningful culture where authentic ideas can really soak into my brain.

Thanks for all of your support, mom. I know sometimes you don't 'get' why I am the way that I am, but one day, it will all make sense. Tell dad I said hey. I hope he isn't still mad at me for quitting sports in high school. Sometimes I play frisbee golf.

Your son,
AltKid Growing Up

PS: In this envelope, you will find 3 CDs of bands with female singers. You will like them.
a) Feist
b) Crystal Castles
c) Uffie + Beach House mix CD

Give them some times. You'll grow into them.

P.P.S: Please send a little bit more money. The seasons are changing and I need some new jackets and stuff like that. I have my eye on this black leather one, or maybe a pea coat.

______________________
Previous letter to my mom
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2008/05/mothers-day-means-a-meaningful-hro-tribute-to-mothers-of-alt-kids.html

What's the deal with fashion designers making women cover up? I thought that since we live in the 'Western World', we are allowed to objectify women in public. It's rlly not fair to try to create a new fashion gimmick using the same ideology that our terrorist enemies use. I hate oppression, yall.

I would NEVER live in the Middle East/Far East because I couldn't eyeball fuck hotties/kreepily gaze at [barely illegal] hotties. Does n e 1 know why they make them 'cover up'? Do they like tugjobs over there, or are they just like 'over-protective boyfriends' who don't want their GFs to look sexy in public so they make them wear denim jumpers?

I would never live in a country/a cult where every woman had to wear possessive boyfriend jeans.

Would u move to Dubai? I hear they give you a lot of money to buy nice stuff (like Sharper Image closeout items and leather goods) if u move there. They also build a lot of stuff that isn't rlly very practical. That place is going to look like a Pixar movie in like 2 yearz.

What's the deal with HIJAB fashion?
From wikipedia:

Hijab or ħijāb (حجاب, pronounced: [ħi.ˈdʒæːb]) is the Arabic term for "cover" (noun), based on the root حجب meaning "to veil, to cover (verb), to screen, to shelter".

It's srsly taking over. I wish every1 could live in a world where women could be objectified. More importantly, I wish every little girl could live in a world where she constructed her self-concept based upon her objectification levels from ages 3 to 35. I'm a dreamer, though. :-( Call me crazie...

[Hijab meme stolen from Tumbledore]

Remember the simple days when life was all about chillin in Palestinian Scarves that didn't 'cover up too much'?

N e ways... I'm just saying that I am least likely to study abroad on the following continents:

• Africa
• Asia (except Japan and maybe the Euro part of Russia)
• Antarctica
• Iceland
• Guantanamo Bay
• Brazil
• South America/ n e where below the USA on a map

I am most likely to study abroad in

• A country where they speak English like the UK/Australia
• A country where they speak English like Germany
• A country where they speak French like France
• A country where they speak Mexican like Spain
• A country where they speak electro like France/Australia
• Toronto
• Honolulu (I hear it's really alt over there now)

What's up with the world? When did it all get s0 'random' (in a bad kind of way, not a funny kind of way)?
I will blog for social change more often. I feel like a better person now.