HIPSTER RUNOFF

I was reading some mainstream snarky blogs and zany meme aggregators, and they showed off some guy who had a model of child predator glasses tattooed on to his face. Some people said that he is a 'hipster', but I feel like he might be more of a GenX-alt4lifer, who probably has a bartending job or something. Most people who have invested heavily in tattoos don't have a 'real job', unless they are an African American professional athlete.

It seems like people who get tattoos 'just want to bring more attention to their personal brand', but this bro took it a step further. After covering his whole body with tattoos, he needed something more than I.R.L. ppl looking at him like 'omg.' He needed to create a lil bit of social media that 'took the internet by storm.'

The process seems straightforward.

Have a 'tattoo artist' doodle/trace some glasses on to ur face/skull.

Make sure every1 is chill.

Make sure my mnstrm bro is filming it

Try not 2 'lol' cuz of the pain.

Reassure urself. Say 'when ppl look at my body during my open casket funeral, they will see an old man who had zany glasses tattied on to his face. They will truly understand me. This tatty is worth it 4 my long term brand goals.'

Get ready 4 the ink gun.

Bleeding a lil bit. Feeling pain.

Need 2 take a breather since it hurts so much.

Almost done... Wonder if a 'tattoo artist' has the same skills as a 'sandwich artist' [via Subway].

Does my GF like it? She will look into this face as I make love 2 her. This face will sit across from her parents at Thnxgvng dnnr. These bifocals will enhance the view of my son exiting her birth canal. This bro is me.

Feeling pumped about my new brand. Like I could get a job at some sort of rugged Gen X alt lifestyle magazine like Vice or Street Carnage and Television Boners.

Feel happy 2 b alive. Feel happy 2 have a girl who will support me no matter what.

Is this bro a 'hipster'?
Is this a 'hipster meme' that is as strong as 'the hipster olympics'?
Is this bro 'trying 2 hard'?
Is this bro 'fucking bad ass' and 'not a pussy like u' because he got a face tat?
What type of sunglasses would u get tattooed on to ur face? Wayfarers? Child Preds? Shuttershades?
Is this bro's brand enhanced, or 'in the shitter' with his new face tat?
Is Mike Tyson the ultimate face tat bro?
Do u think he could hold down a job in Corporate Middle America?
Do u think this decade will have solid human memes?
Does it 'hurt' 2 get a tattoo?
Is the only pain that hurts u 'emotional pain'?
Is there more 2 life than 'how kewl u look'?
Is the GenX alternative brand 'too raw' 4 u, like they don't value their own consumer power?

Do u ever miss 'the old u', before u transitioned ur brand into something totally new and different?

Ever just wish u could go back in time and chill with ur bros, back b4 everything got complicated?
Do u ever regret some of the personal branding choices/personal interests that ur personal brand implemented/absorbed?
Should I get a _________ tattoo on my _________?

Previous Child Predator Glasses Coverage
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/2009/01/forecasting-the-child-predator-glasses-economy.html

Previous Zany Tattoos
http://www.hipsterrunoff.com/tag/tattoos

[Photo by the Preggers Goldfish]

Yall. Because of Universal Warming, the sun is getting brighter/hotter. Eventually, the sun will be able to burn through our corneas and possibly our retinas. This means that we are going to have to wear more Protective Technologies, like Shutter Shades, blind people glasses, and flickr blockrs. In an effort to reduce time spent out during daylight hours, men and women will be forced to dress in black & wear humble loafers. We will carry fannypacks that aren't strapped around our fannies full of nourishment & emergency medical supplies.

Are yall scared of the future?

Here is a diagram of the human eye for readers who obtained education which focused in the Arts & Humanities (instead of Math & Science).

Guys, we have to make sure that we don't lose our vision. If we can't look at computer screens/the way other people look, then how are we going to construct ourselves? Would h8 to have to listen to the radio to consume all of my information. And we wouldn't have the opportunity to 'get' funnie viral videos/sillie internet pix of cats that want veggieburgers.

Should I buy these functional shuttershades to protect my eyesight?

[Photo by Domestic Fine Arts]

Or should I become a welding masked DJ?

Are shuttershades no longer mainstream-alt, yall?
Is there a new glasses trend that we need to be aware of?

Does n e 1 work for a design firm that is creating the next big sunglasses trend? Will it be martini glasses? I need to know if I should invest in a certain type of sunglasses stock.

Does n e 1 know if AZN glasses are going to be big in 2k10?

The Olympics in China have been really successful, so I think a lot of people are going to 'try to be AZN' or something like that. U know how the world is... when they see something that they think is 'alt', they try to align their personal brand with it. s00 annoying/inauthentic.

Does n e 1 know if white framed sunglasses are still 'underground'/'indie'/'unique-core'?

Should I just buy some zany coloured Wayfarers and match them to my clothing?

Or should I buy sunglasses that enable me to take the lenses out for days when it isn't sunny?

YALL.
I'M SO CONFUSED. I HATE THE TAIL-END OF TRENDS. IT'S LIKE I DON'T KNOW WHO I AM N E M0RE. SUXXX SO BAD.

N e ways...Summer is almost over... do u need to wear sunglasses in the non-summer? Or are they a summer-exclusive accessory?
r u gonna miss the Shuttershade era?
R.I.P. Kanye West. U had a good run.

Remember when Shark Vs Bear did the Concept Gallery 'STUFF IN MY MOUF'?
Well, Claytonhauck@EveryOneIsFamous just did a new concept gallery built around taking pix of QTs in sunglasses who attended Pitchfork Music Festival.

Sooo many alts--not enough interesting sunglasses! The local thrift store economy/Sunglass Hut must have seen a boom in order to make these galleries s0 perfct.

View the gallery
http://everyoneisfamous.com/chicken/071908/1.html

Does n e 1 care about bands at music festivals any more? I am more interested in pictures of festival bros + alt-broed out alt bros who are proud to be attending their annual [HIGHLY BLGGBLE] regional music festival.

Have u ever read a festival write-up/'review' and thought, 'Wow. I rlly wish I could have been there. Seeing ////Prince cover Radiohead/JayZ sing "Wonder Wall"/watch (upcoming indie band) captivate an audience as the sunset/// would have RLLY made my life more meaningful.'

What's the deal with LIVE MUSIC, yall?