ALL | ALT REPORT | CLASSIC
Super Mario
My first design school project.
Photo via the Style Scout


Hey yall. Had a super busy weekend. I have been awake for the past 72 hours, doing tons of addy (adderal), a lil bit of blow, 5-hour energies, Diet Red Bulls, and even tapped into my 'emergency reserves' of Sparks. My first design school project is due tomorrow, and the critique is gonna be super hard. My professor was a guest judge on Project Runway, so I really need to impress him if I want to get an internship with some1 relevant.

The assignment was 'make a piece of clothing that represents u.' I chose to make a sweet jacket. I'm new to sewing, so I needed something that would rlly 'stand out' without exposing my technical flaws. I think the rugged aesthetic of my jacket really works. It looks formal, but also 'chill' since there is some denim. There's also a patch of my fave game, Super Mario World, on it. Really feel like this jacket is me.

I am afraid of my critique, yall. Afraid of 'having to justify' why my work of art exists. Not sure if I will 'get fucking grilled' for some of my design decisions. Worried that there will be some hi level art fggts who make better stuff than me. Worried about 'not being the best' in my class. Don't want 2 b made fun of. This jacket is 'actually me.' Just hope people accept me 4 who I am.

Should I attempt 2 reconnect with my past & attend a Super Mario themed party?


I feel like I've lost touch with the person I used to be. I remember being so happie as a child, close to my siblings and my parents. But now I am just a shadow of a 'real person', unable to have authentic connections with n e 1.

I might select an iconic staple from my youth, and try to utilize it in a way that helps me reconnect with my past. Probs gonna do this with the popular network of characters spawned by Nintendo's classic game Super Mario Bros. Those bros have been there with me through everything. Sorta think that Super Mario Kart is pretty chill.

It would be chill to chil with Toad again / get a tugjob from Princess Toadstool.

Photos via VillageVoice

Might find a ghey version of Donkey/Diddy Kong who is some sort of sexie cage/gogo dancer.

Probs gonna chill with Wario or something.

Thinking about chilling down a pipe and never returning, ending up in some chill ass world where I can run free, jumping and collecting coins.

Miss the days when I could 'escape' and just play a video game. Can't believe I am 'grown up' now and people are doing 'fun shit' like having Mario Partiez. Feels 'not very real.' I want 2 curl up in a ball and pretend that I am a child again. I am scared of life. I am scared of my retirement plan/real problems.

What type of 'ironic' vintage party would yall have 2 connect with ur past?

Is Super Mario Brothers 3 Authentic?


[Photo by The Sarty]
Sometimes I wish I could be a blipster so I could wear a lot more 'street wear'/'gimmicky products' without looking like a complete ALTBRO-who-is-trying-too-hard. Just wanna wear video game t-shirts that I purchased from my local Hot Topic/videoGameStore. Just wanna create lego accessories. H8 that this bro can 'pull off' his semi-quirky look, but m0st people would just look kinda like 'zany-core' fggts if they wore this.

What is the most authentic video game thingy?
a) Super Mario
b) Mario 2 (only in America)
c) Mario 3
d) Super Mario Land
e) Mario Teaches Typing
f) Dr. Mario
g) Mario 64
h) Paper Mario
i) Super Mario Kart (authentic one)
j) Mario Kart 64
k) Mario Tennis
l) Mario Gold
m) Mario Party
n) prefer Wario products
o) prefer Luigi products
j) The Mario Brothers movie starring Dennis Hopper as Bowser
k) Mario FGGT
l) violent games that never end which u can play on the internet with people u don't know
m) Choose.Your.Own.Response

XX BONUS ALT'S BEST FRIEND XX
Should I get my dog an altBro bandana?

[Photo by GlamCanyon]