HIPSTER RUNOFF

I recently read a story about a group of 50 bros dressed in all black who 'caused mayhem' on some street, then threw some rocks/beat in the windows of an American Apparel store. This indicates that 'retail terrorism' might be recycled into a relevant alt trend.  I feel scared because I was sorta getting behind the concept of buying stuff from trusted brands to express who I am. Like the concept of 'consumerism' has sort of become 'chill' these days, as opposed to something that we are supposed 2 h8.

Recently, another bro crashed a small airplane into an Internal Revenue Service building in Austin, Texas.

It seemed like he was sort of trying to promote a similar brand, like 'money is bullshit' or something, or maybe that 'the government enables this bull shit society in which we are trapped.'

I feel shaken up by these recent acts of consumer + retail terrorism, like the idea of being anti-government + anti-consumerism is 'back', and I might have to ride that wave in order to be considered an 'interesting person with a relevant opinion.' I like the way things are now, where I just have to keep up to date on buzzbands to be interesting. I think being a self-aware American is fun and chill, since we sort of just get to 'cope' with other ppl abt how we are trapped, but then just watch viral videos and forget about it.

Worried I might have to 'backpack bomb' a local suburban mall or something in order to be alt + authentic.

Sorta wonder if the post-1990s vibe of 'Fight Club' is 'coming back.' Like we 'hate consumerism', and we need to perform snarky acts of chill / metaphorical terrorism to free ourselves'. Miss u Project Mayhem / Fight Club.

Did Fight Club help us 2 become more authentic consumers, or did it 'set back the anti-consumerism' movement 20 years?
Seems like formative alternative bros probably chilled with Fight Club posters in their rooms. Miss u Ed Norton + Brad Pitt.

Sorta miss the days Ed Norton's career when he was 'budding into a relevant alt actor' and it was 'kewl' to say he was ur fave actor. I remember in American History X when he committed an act of retail terrorism against a local market that was hiring illegal immigrant workers.

I feel confused, since terrorism is 'violence', but maybe 'standing up for something' in the real world will become a more popular trend. There will be backlash against 'cowards who only exist on blogs / the comment forms of blogs.'

Is 'retail' bullshit?
Is eCommerce the future/the past?
Should we blow up all of the credit card company buildings across the world?
Should we start regional Fight Clubs with our bros?

If u had a relevant chain of branded clothes + apparel, what type of mall would u put it in? Maybe a safe indoor mall.

Maybe outdoor malls with security guards seem 'safe', since they are tucked away in suburbia

do yall trust 'mall cops' 2 protect ur merch, or is retail inventory 'so cheap' that it doesn't even matter?

R u gonna keep buying stuff from retail outlets or commit metaphorical terrorist acts on them?
Should Am Appy use more animal fur to attract a new demographic of protesters?
How can I perform an act of 'retail terrorism' on Amazon.com?
Should I get a summer job at Hot Topic, then set it on fire?
As tweens grow into their teen years, will they experience a consumer backlash against Jonas Brotherian/Hannah Montanian ideals which they once 'bought in to'?
Will Brad Pitt's most memorable role always be _________?

Hey yall. As yall know, I spend most of my time on the internet, but sometimes I like to escape 2 a different reality by playing some video games. Decided to 'smoke a bowl of marijuana cigarettes' and unwind by playing this new chill game. Had to go on a 'mission.'

Damn. This game seems 'mad violent.' Like stuff that they use to train terrorists/miscellaneous evil people in the world who do things like 'shoot up high schools/colleges/work places.' I wonder if it is good to have progressive games like this. Do u think they offer 'truly sick people' a reality where they can enact their rage, or is it more of an incubator for terrible I.R.L. things 2 happen? Sometimes I feel happy that some of the most 'fucking pathetic' people in society are lost in a world of video games, pornography, and Doritos/Hot Pockets. It makes me happy that they live indoors, and don't even know what it feels like when the sun hits their skin. Feel like they get most of their perspectives on the world from movies like 'The Matrix' and other ideologically-charged action scifi movies.

Do u think it would be sweet to play a video game with these scenarios?

• driving a UHAUL with a bomb up to a federal building and 'blowing that shit up'
• going on a serial killer type of spree where u rape/murder/bury bodies beneath ur house
• flying planes into buildings
• backpack bombing public areas
• shooting up a school and having 2 kill over 50% of the students
• trying to ignite a bomb on a commercial airliner

I wonder if video games are 'better than ever.' Maybe this is the type of stuff that all humans want 2 do, but now we finally have a realm where it is safe 2 do it.

Maybe all humans want the same things.  Maybe we just want 2 cum at all costs.

Just want a room full of vaginas to make love to.

Need a way to take out my tween angst.

So many different video games. Wonder which 1 I would be if I 'loved video games.' Feel like I might either be a tween who plays a Nintendo DS, and has digital friends/pets/possessions in a simulated world, or maybe just an old person who plays Wii to battle Alzheimer's/depression/arthritis/diabetes.

Wish more video games brought humans 2gether, instead of promoting the killage of humans.

Want to connect with my local retirement community scene, coming together, celebrating our last years on Earth.

Feeling confused. At the beginning of this post, I thought video games were terrible for humanity, but then by the end of my internet research, I determined that there are positive uses for video game simulated technology. I feel like we need to promote human connections, but it would also be acceptable to round up the major threats to society, and allow them to get most of their life experiences in a simulated version of a violent reality.

It seems like if we programmed some sort of violent video game that took 40-100 years to beat, we could really save a lot of communities/international relations. Just want 2 live forever, and eliminate violence.

Not sure abt video games.
Do yall know of any video games that are safe/violent?
Are video games a 'waste of time'?
Do u know if we could build some sort of system where we plug human brains into a hyper-reality, but actually use their body heat to create the energy that powers the computers that run our society?
Are video games 'the master art' since they combine all elements of modern art?

Previous Video Game Coverage
Game Boy Necklace Blipster....
Beatles Rock Band = ghey
Landing in the Hudson River video game

Photo via lastnightspartie

Yall. I know that most people who seem 'arab'/'islam'/'muslim'/whatever generalized term for people from the Middle East-ish/India/Pakistan/Afghanny are NOT terrorists. But srsly...do yall feel like as Americans, u sort of 'fear' people who seem a lil bit too ethnic. Would u ever party with a bro who u racially profiled, or do u just try to party with people who are your colour + 1 blipster + 1 azn + 1 half-mexi? Do u think that 'white people' just manage to fit in the most?

Wonder if partying with 'the enemy' would land me in Guantanamo Bay [via Shawkshank/Harold and Kumar].

Wonder why I feel so obsessed with racial issues. I feel excessively paranoid, like I might be 'racist' deep down, and there is nothing I can do to 'unteach' myself.

Have u ever been boarding a flight, and u look around for the 'bro who seems like the most likely to light his shoe-bomb on fire and take the plane down'? Feel like it is usually some sort of Arab person, or a bro who is dressed like he is from the Middle East, or a very suspicious normal looking bro who is probably some sort of medical student. I feel weird when they see u looking at them, and they are like 'fuck u bro. I'm not a terrorist. My family is richer than urs and I have a better education than u.' It makes me feel hella guilty.

Yall. is there something wrong with me? Or am I just 'a stupid american' who went 2 public school? Feel worried that I am not 'globally aware' enough even though I studied abroad in Europe/Boston.
Srsly though... would u partie with a terrorist? What would u do? Which terrorist would u partie with? Is George W. Bush still a terrorist, or is he a chill bro now?

Yall. I have been reading CNN.com, and found that Obama is on a 'rebranding' campaign through the Middle East. I think he wants to 'prove that we have changed' and that we're 'not ass holes any more', and we 'need their help' so that Iran doesn't bomb the USA.

I thought that once George W. Bush left office, our nation would be safe again, cuz the rest of the world would realize that we had 'some Texan racist bro' as our President. Guess it's 'not that ez.' Wish I could live knowing that America/my local mall/business center isn't gonna get bombed by some krazie ppl.

Got sad when I saw Obama getting 'stomped on'

I just wish these people understood how 'cool' and 'normal' Obama is, so that maybe they could accept him, too.

Think this is a metaphor that Obama is 'still the enemy' even though he is in a different mask

I think she really cares about Obama going home because she took the time to trace out the sign with a pencil before putting marker ink on the sign.

YALL. Do you think America will ever be 'cool' in the eyes of the Muslims/Arabs? Do they know that he drinks brewskies at basketball games and participates in March Madness?
I think we need to send them large television screens that they can put in public spaces and watch more American television.
Does n e 1 know the difference between 'Muslims', 'Arabs', 'Middle Easterners', and 'terrorist cells'?
Do u think it is time 2 give up on peace in the Middle East?
Should we just build a metaphorical firewall around America?
Should we put a boot in their ass?

Can we send 'Arabia' some sort of care packages full of leftover Obama Presidential Campaign t-shirt, stickers, and miscellaneous tactile memes.