HIPSTER RUNOFF

The darkest music lovers in the world are ppl who 'love vinyl' because they honestly believe that they have a more real relationship with music because of their willingness to seek out and overpay for music that is stored on some sort of weird plastic. Because they are aging, and have outdated music playing technology, they believe that they are 'the last authentic music fans standing'. Fortunately, record stores across the country continue to close down every day because tweens love using iTunes to purchase individual songs instead of entire albums of pointless noise for grown men to spooge their pants over because they probably never spooged in a woman's vagina to create a mainstream life for themselves when they had the chance to make a child with the one woman in their lives' who would ever love them. Simply put, even cool dads 'impulse buy' off iTunes these days. They love technology.

Anyways, some random bro made 'Shit Record Collectors Say' in order to go viral. This isn't even very funny, or well done, but we are all just trying to 'capitalize' off the Shit _____ Says meme while it was still hot. Hopefully this bro gets a coupon at his local record store, or maybe a handjob, or something. I feel like he should probably try to sell his old records, invest in a fast food franchise chain, and just move forward with his life. Do u think this bro 'effin nailed it' with solid production, witty commentary, and great set design?

The Childless UnCool Non-Dad is just searching 4 something that is his own... [via vinyl record collecting]

Will this bro go 'alt viral'?
Does he provide relevant commentary on the state of vinyl record sales?
Do u feel like he evr has sex with the hole in the middle of the record?
Do u prefer MP3s?
Are 'vinyl records' 4 'effing dbags'?
Should 'the record' die?
Do u feel bad 4 childless uncool non-dads?
Should we all just listen 2 everything 4 free out of 'the cloud' [via spottyfy]?
Was this HEE-LAR-EE-OUS?

In recent years, blogs have enabled this 'National Alt Holiday' called Record Store Day. Basically, you are encouraged to go out and support your local record store by purchasing your buzzband's vinyl records thru these dying record stores. I think bloggers have been really into it because they feel 'guilty' for changing the music industry so much, so feigned nostalgia for 'supporting small biz owners' seems like an authentic thing to do.

Anyways, some dude who STARTED Record Store Day just went out of business. "If only we could find a way 2 make Record Store Day every day..."

The man behind Record Store Day has been forced to shut up shop.
Eric Levin, who founded the day to help promote independent record stores, will close Criminal Records in Atlanta, Georgia in November (11), according to the Atlanta Journal Constitution.
Levin says, "We've been underwater since the economy became distressed. We've been on a rescue mission for three years. I'm done paying for it by myself.
"I gave myself until the 20th anniversary and if I was still drowning by August 2011, I'd pull the plug."

It is definitely always sad when some1's 'passion project' business goes out of business bc of evolving technology/business standards & practices/etc... But at the same time... KINDA FUNNIE/IRONIC... right? :-P

The man who came up with the last great record store gimmick finally 'came up short'. :-(

Do u support Record Stores, or is 'every day Record Store Day on iTunes/Spotify?'
Do u feel bad for this bro 4 going out of business, or does this happen in every line of work if u fail 2 push your business model 2 evolve?
Do u h8 Record Store Day?
Do u think this bro still gets $$$ for 'inventing' Record Store Day?
Is it 'too crowded' when u try to purchase ur fave band's limited edition vinyls?
Has Record Store Day become 'too commercialized' anyways? [via buzzbands piggybacking it 4 press]
Do u support ur local record store, or just stream shit / buy it off itunes / steal it / Spotify it?
Would u rather just order ur vinyls 'totally cheap' on the internet so that artists get 100% of the profit?
Were Record Stores always overrated anyways?

NPR is an influential overground tastemaker that provides 'interesting content' for boring ppl who actively want to be cool. Since every other relevant new media outlet has written about 'the exciting resurgence of vinyl sales bc of indie music', NPR wrote a segment about it. Because most NPR listeners are 'sheep' who use it as a GROUPON-esque tastemaking service, you know that most overground cool dads might start to build a vinyl record collection now.

Anyways, did a standard interview with some record label called "Mexicans in the Summer" that probably releases indie tejano music or something.

Even the people who service vinyl's small but devoted audience are cautious when describing the format's resurgence.

"Vinyl is definitely growing, and will continue to grow. But I think there's a ceiling," says Andres Santo Domingo, the co-founder of the label Mexican Summer. "I don't think it'll ever become the prevalent format. I think it'd be crazy to think that."

Leave it to NPR to produce content that is 'boring and sensible' and probably features a bunch of ppl talking in calm voices.

I sorta wish this article was more 'bold' and they really sold vinyl records as 'being back' just because the headline made it seem like vinyl 'was back' but now they are like 'well, KINDA...'

Abrahamsson says the small resurgence vinyl has enjoyed lately is easier to understand as a reaction — and a complement — to the options available online.

"I think it definitely was a reaction to the mp3, but I think the two of them together make perfect sense," he says.

Oh well, at least I learned that vinyl is made out of pellets.

I feel kinda weird that ppl can listen to the local-news-esque trend pieces on the radio and 'feel more interesting.'

Is NPR the most relevant music blog?
Is NPR the #1 influencer in the altosphere?
Is vinyl 'back' or will it never be 'back' because it can't fit on a computer?
Are ppl who collect vinyl records 'complete ass holes'?
Do records + CDs + cassette tapes have 'too much' of a carbon footprint?
Should I go to my local Best Buy and buy a laser disc hybrid record player?

NPR

Blog, Company

NPR is some dying radio station that is trying to brand itself as an 'indie tastemaker' because of their cool dad audience.

Lists: cool dads, radio, blogs and magazines

Read more>>>>

From what I have read on the internet, vinyl sales 'surged' in 2k10, since people no longer buy CDs, but they want a more authentic experience than just 'purchasing an mp3 from the internet.' Some people are really in denial abt the future of the music industry, so they are just trying their best to 'be authentic' by purchasing bulky packaging + outdated technology 2 play on their outdated record player just so they can be all like "U can really tell the difference, this sounds amazing!"

Anyways, bc of those types of cool dads with too much money, vinyl record sales are 'at an all time high' or something like that.

Though overall album sales dropped 13 percent in 2010, sales of vinyl increased by 14 percent over the previous year, with around 2.8 million units sold. This is a new record for vinyl sales since 1991, when the format had all but disappeared in the wake of the CD boom, according to a report released yesterday by Nielsen SoundScan.

This really isn't a big deal if u 'look at the numbers' because it is just cool dad music, mainstream indie, and boring old bands like The Beatles and Michael Jackson. People probably thought they were 'purchasing a collector's item' or something.

Top Ten Vinyl Albums, 1/4/2010 - 1/2/2011
1. The Beatles Abbey Road (35,000)
2. Arcade Fire The Suburbs (18,800)
3. Black Keys Brothers (18,400)
4. Vampire Weekend Contra (15,000)
5. Michael Jackson Thriller (14,200)
6. The National High Violet (13,600)
7. Beach House Teen Dream (13,000)
8. Jimi Hendrix Experience Valleys of Neptune (11,400)
9. Pink Floyd Dark Side of the Moon (10,600)
10. the xx xx (10,200)

Top Ten Vinyl Artists, 1/4/2010 - 1/2/2011
1. The Beatles (36,700)
2. Black Keys (36,000)
3. Radiohead (30,500)
4. Arcade Fire (28,600)
5. Jimi Hendrix (26,400)
6. The National (24,600)
7. Pavement (24,200)
8. Vampire Weekend (21,900)
9. Metallica (20,000)
10. Bob Dylan (17,000)

Are the Black Keys the ultimate cool dad band?
Are the Beatles 'overrated'?
Did people just buy Beatles + MJ albums to use as 'posters' in their roomes?
Should indie record labels pointlessly sink tons of funds into pressing vinyl records instead of releasing CDs + MP3s 2 the general public?
Can some1 do some research on 'cassette sales' 'booming' in '2k12'?
Do these stats mean anything?
Will there be enough mainstream indie bands who release vinyl records in 2k11 to keep this trend moving upwards?
How many vinyl records were sold in 1977/some other random year b4 8-tracks/cassettes/mini-disc players existed??